🍗 Deathfat Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

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FarmVille said:
Yeah hymens can't grow back, that's a myth but i doubt ALR could reach her vagina to check
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Oh no, ambers has not only held on into her 20s, but has been stitched back up before. The doctor sewed it back or whatever after her surgery. Bless them for restoring our gorls honor as a fair lezbean maiden who only does clit stuff.
Amber loves larping as a young girl that wishes to be wed and has her whole life ahead of her.
FickleFuck said:
I am positive that the reason they had a hard time with her cooch issues is because of all the fat she carries in her gut. That shit is pressing down and making it damn near impossible for a vag doc to do shit down there. Her muscles are garbage and she's probably all prolapsed or will be, especially now that her uterus was yeeted.
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Her weight up top must be making her essentially leak urine just a little bit all day too. Everything just pressing on stuff below, she must smell like straight up piss if you get close enough to her. Theres no amount of showering that will stop her bladder from being just slightly leaky forever.

Yellow Monday said:
I would suggest vaginismus, which is involuntary contraction of the vaginal walls. Once that happens, it would keep even The Rock out. Doesn’t matter if you are experienced or a virgin - once it kicks in, there’s no going further. If it keeps happening, they end up sedating/anaesthetising you to be able to get anywhere.
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I wonder if obsessively brushing one's teeth will help with that.
 
mythical mother said:
“I’m writing a novel that is plotted around that topic”

Writer-Lynn, future NYT bestselling author and expert Laygo architect.

View attachment 3000459
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Yeah, that's gonna be a hard pass for a multitude of reasons. Although it would be mildly interesting to read what Amber's misguided and ignorant interpretation of what a BDSM relationship would be
 
Destiny was answering questions on Snapchat or similar. These can be found on Faxx Machines community tab. They were all "This or That" questions.

One of the questions was "Jade or Becky?"

Weirdly, she didn't answer "Who's Jade?"
 
Yellow Monday said:
I would suggest vaginismus, which is involuntary contraction of the vaginal walls. Once that happens, it would keep even The Rock out. Doesn’t matter if you are experienced or a virgin - once it kicks in, there’s no going further. If it keeps happening, they end up sedating/anaesthetising you to be able to get anywhere.
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Vaginismus would’ve shown up before though. She certainly wasn’t complaining about it when Density was fingering her on the regular.
 
What's the excuse du jour?


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MirnaMinkoff said:
The fact that Amber felt the need to say this shows she’s really fucked in the head. I think Amber’s relationships don’t end with lesbian bed death, they just start with it.
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I think if she were honest, she'd classify herself as asexual.


Yellow Monday said:
I would suggest vaginismus, which is involuntary contraction of the vaginal walls. Once that happens, it would keep even The Rock out. Doesn’t matter if you are experienced or a virgin - once it kicks in, there’s no going further. If it keeps happening, they end up sedating/anaesthetising you to be able to get anywhere.
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I was going to suggest this as well. It makes sense based on what she's told us.


Hentai-4-Senpai said:
I blame @FickleFuck and @Situation Type Deal Gorl
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Go fuck yourself, my dude. LOL


Insulin reid said:
Her weight up top must be making her essentially leak urine just a little bit all day too. Everything just pressing on stuff below, she must smell like straight up piss if you get close enough to her. Theres no amount of showering that will stop her bladder from being just slightly leaky forever.
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I bet she smells like the men's bathroom at the end of a football game.


Free the Pedos said:
Vaginismus would’ve shown up before though. She certainly wasn’t complaining about it when Density was fingering her on the regular.
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But was Density actually doing that, I wonder. There's no reason for her to be yammering about not liking penetrative sex if she were already used to it from the Density Era.
 
FickleFuck said:
I am positive that the reason they had a hard time with her cooch issues is because of all the fat she carries in her gut. That shit is pressing down and making it damn near impossible for a vag doc to do shit down there. Her muscles are garbage and she's probably all prolapsed or will be, especially now that her uterus was yeeted. Older women that have their shit yoinked out and since their muscle tone is about gone too, things will end up hanging out of there and they have to get corrective surgery to put things back up where they belong. Imagine the day Hambutt goes to wipe and there's a penis-like length of intestine busting out her dainty hole.
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the terms “dainty period hole”/“dainty hole” will never fail to trigger my gag reflex.
 
w4vy_gr4vy said:
She already made her excuse. Wasn't she going to stay with a friend over the weekend? And she's already told us how she always gains weight when she spends time with friends...
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I do not buy her statement that she is spending the weekend with friends.

1. Amber does not have friends. All her friends have been Becky's or her other girlfriends. So, who could it be? Eric and Rickie possibly but we would have mentioned them, so I say NO. Therefore, they are Jade's friends. This is strange since Jade is not from the area and to have to stay overnight means that they are not local to Lexington. Otherwise either drive back after the evening or Uber if you are intending to drink.

2. Amber and Jade are roommates the same way Becky and Amber were roommates. Amber abhors being left alone in the flat and she will tag along even if Jade has a hot date. She went to the retirement home with Destiny even if she was not working there just not to be left alone. If Jade intent to stay the night with someone, Amber has no problem staying in the next room as long as she is not alone.
 
I don't think for a second that Amber actually went anywhere, and I'm sure no one else believes her either. "Staying with friends" is Amberspeak for "I sat at home bingeeeeeen on ramen and whatever the Uber Eats guy delivered", but she's got to keep up the pretence of being a popular dainty gorl about town with a busy social life.
 
w4vy_gr4vy said:
She already made her excuse. Wasn't she going to stay with a friend over the weekend? And she's already told us how she always gains weight when she spends time with friends...
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No no no. She gains weight from riding in the car. She's like one of those plants that absorbs water and potato chips through the air.
 
I just need more information about the weirdo that is Jade Francis. I mean, all we have is she attended university. Was seemingly athletic. Has a good job which, apparently needs a certain level of intelligence and yet she has relocated to another state, a flight away from her family, to live with an internet stranger. A 550lb narcissist, youtuber who is hated by her viewers. Who has admitted to having poor hygiene and has left her ex’s hating her. Has no close family and no friends at all. I cannot see the appeal in big al at all. Except to an obvious grifter who sees Al’s money? Even then, how does she bring herself to suck on big Al’s neck, let alone her 😸? Who is this Jade? Some fetishist of the obese and stinky? Is it like when overly stressed CEO’s need to see a sex worker to be punished and humiliated, or treat like babies in order to de-stress? Or is she an under cover ‘hater’ gathering info about big al in order to write her own tell all book? 😉
 
Black-coffee-queen said:
I just need more information about the weirdo that is Jade Francis. I mean, all we have is she attended university. Was seemingly athletic. Has a good job which, apparently needs a certain level of intelligence and yet she has relocated to another state, a flight away from her family, to live with an internet stranger. A 550lb narcissist, youtuber who is hated by her viewers. Who has admitted to having poor hygiene and has left her ex’s hating her. Has no close family and no friends at all. I cannot see the appeal in big al at all. Except to an obvious grifter who sees Al’s money? Even then, how does she bring herself to suck on big Al’s neck, let alone her 😸? Who is this Jade? Some fetishist of the obese and stinky? Is it like when overly stressed CEO’s need to see a sex worker to be punished and humiliated, or treat like babies in order to de-stress? Or is she an under cover ‘hater’ gathering info about big al in order to write her own tell all book? 😉
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Is an Wifey an undercover agent that's trolling AL in the long run? Or is she a grifter with a modicum of shame and secrecy? I imagine she's the latter, as gworl got herself a shitty sports car. If she ever comes out with the hot deetz, I imagine she'll be laughed at and then lambasted off the internet. No matter which angle you look at it, it's skeevy as fuck.
 
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