Well well well, if it isn't my old nemesis Big Al, the losiest loser that ever lost. Not weight, mind you. Every single challenge she's ever set for herself.
Feb 18th weighin: 496.4
Says that since starting Noom three days ago, she is down 1.6pounds, and she feels "really good about that". About what? That it's equal to nothing to do with real weight loss and instead is just a normal days fluctuation or probably what would be to you a small shit? OK.
Says she is logging all the calories she eats, but she's not going to show us what those calories are, presumably because we'd see she is indeed eating like shit.
SUPER busy, guise, because she has to pack to go to "a friend's house"
for a sleepover to spend the weekend. However will you manage to get packed with your bursting at the seams life, Big Al? Given that you do nothing and go nowhere in general (both metaphorically and liiiiidurally) I figure it's got to be super easy, barely an inconvenience. She's also been cleaning up a bit. LOL
She's taking the scale with her. Claims the "gf" weighs in every day. Also claims the shirt she's wearing didn't fit her before but it does now.
Sitting in the car with Twinkie while the "gf" pops into a convenience store to get an energy drink, and naturally big Al needs to have a snack for the drive. And a diet coke, to cancel out all the terrribleness that is the snack she's going to hoover. Hey, you know what make a good snack? A nice complementary serving of a balance of protein and carbs. Something like a cured meat - salami maybe, or perhaps pepperoni - maybe a little cheese, and a few crackers to give it all a little textural mix. Imagine if something like that existed!
It's now Feb 20. Of course she did not vlog while at the "friend's" house. She also did not weigh herself. That's the spirit! Of course you can skip days! You only said 100 days of weighing in. you didn't specify WHICH days! With a logical mind like that, I bet you could go to law school and teach all those folks a thing or two, LawyerLynn.
She had "such a good weekend," she says, as she does that stupid pinching motion with her fingers and thumb, like she's fucking Italian. As the weekend was ending, she told herself, "I wish I woulda filmed." Says she didn't have permission to film inside her "friend's" home, so didn't weigh in, even though the only thing that would have been filmed in the scale, so none of that makes any sense, as usual.
You see, Big Al, I think when you are finally piled up on your deathbed, the last things going through your mind are all the "I wish I woulda" molments you've had in your life, thanks to your insistence on being a deathfat.
They went places - like the mall. Says she thoroughly enjoyed it. Of course you did. Says they "didn't feel" like going to the grocery, so they did InstaCart and it will be here any second now. Such dedication!
Feb 20th weighin, complete with excuses already (full meal, being swoleeeen in the car, drinking alcohol this past weekend, etc.) so she can set herself up for gaining: 500.6.
Stupid grocery haul. Already peeled garlic (lazy). baby carrots, already chunked pineapple and watermelon, a pint of Haagen-Dazs - which she is going to eat tonight "It is what it is." No, what it is is someone who is going to a shrink for an eating disorder they don't have thinking they'll o a last hurrah and stop their gobs with shit food before they see said shrink. And stop fucking saying "it is what it is". no, it is not. You're choosing to eat that entire pint by yourself, just as you're choosing to eat a sodium bomb of ramen. Skipping the rest of the groceries, she won't be eating the oatmeal or all those fruits. Also bought wet ca food and PointerLynn shows us the case of diet coke, which she also should not be drinking.
It's now the next ay, and she shows us two big Dunkin' Donuts bags. Go hog wild, Big Al! Blathering about the "Refreshers" DD has, and they are going to try all four of them. She's going to try them on camera and "obviously" the "gf" will not. She hates them all, especially theone with coconut, even though she claims to like the other two. Since she isn't having a foodgasm over the other two, we know that's a lie.
She finished her expert laygo piano, She's now moving on to a lego wall art map of the world.
It's now Feb 22. She is no longer going to show her weighins on camera (aka she is not going to be weighing herself at all), so the 100 days is over), because she's at a bad spot with her "eating disorder". This is no different than the phase you went through where you mentioned your (nonexistent) bipolar disorder every five fucking seconds. Now it's all eating disorder this, eating disorder that. Still attempting to shove responsibility off on anything or anyone but yourself. She is so happy that after nine years of people telling her to seek professional help (and her telling all of them to go to hell because she "knows what works" for her) she finally got help. So we're in the honeymoon phase of the cycle: Big Al talks to doctors, even tough they do not understand nutrition like she does, or anything about her incredibly unique "eating disorder". Claims dieting is making her eating disorder worse. No, that would be you, Big Al.
Feb 22 weighin: 503.4
Says that is horrible and she feels it. Was talking to the "gf" about it - it's so weird. Apparently there's some magical line or fairy dust or possibly - probably - a good bit of stupidity going on here, because when she crosses into 500+ pound territory, even something
as simple as 503, her breathing gets worse, her layygs are super swolleeen, it's harder to walk. Nope. That is all in your head. There's no significant difference to a morbidly obese fatty like yourself if they weigh 495 versus 505. That shit is all in your head.
It's the next day, and she's having a gross Amy's microwave meal. BTW, she says, she thinks some people are confused because she said her appointment was for next month, and people thought that meant the appt was a month away. In reality the appt is in a couple of weeks, and she is excited about that.
It's laundry day. She's done three loads of laundry. And guess who's ben reading the farms? That;'s right. (Cued as usual)
She makes it a point to tell us she's washing the sheets from the bed.
After that, she hopes we enjoyed it and she will see us in the next one.
Stupid outro.
TK;DW/DR: Big Al continues to pretend that she has friends, spends time on expert laygos, has an appointment to talk to a shrink, seems to be doing a last hurrah tour before her appointment with the shrink; does laundry, tells us she won't be talking about her weight any more to YT.f
