Amberisms - Because having them in one place is funny

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Is Amber a real and raw writer?

  • No

    Votes: 115 10.6%

  • Fat

    Votes: 886 81.4%

  • Yes

    Votes: 52 4.8%

  • Has potential

    Votes: 35 3.2%
  • Total voters
    1,088
Strine said:
Technically a Beckyism, my own post from months ago but I still think how impossibly dimwitted Becky is for this.

In the BED video where Amber gives a fraudulent spiel about how she was diagnosed with something she doesn't have and wasn't diagnosed with, Becky's powerful intellect was really on display. Did anybody else's brain go off the rails trying to follow this train of thought:
"I've always been a early bird," (not to be confused with an early bird)
"early to rise, early to bed, it's always been the kind of chicken I am."
It must have been someone else driving Amber to Walmart at 3am in 140 consecutive videos this year, although in fairness becky gets up early in the afternoon and goes to bed early in the morning. This very video was filmed in the middle of the night (and indoors, which further justifies the need for a backwards hat. Gotta keep the fierce indoor 3am light off the back of your hair.)
Anyway she follows it up with an anecdote about "this one time" where her sleep was fucked up, and blood shot out of my ears at this quote:
"I've never been up at 8am before, like, and not been asleep."
Oh okay, so you've always been an early bird but you've never been awake at 8am unless you were also asleep.
Click to expand...

Despite the word salad, I understood what she was trying to say. It was Becky's feeble attempt at telling Amber she can't keep up with the weird sleep schedule while doing her best to not irritate Amber.

Becky was never the sharpest crayon in the box, had a very bad education, has no interest in improving herself intellectually and has been sleep deprived for around a year now. It's no wonder the rant came out the way it did.
 
UNSOMNIA (instead of insomnia) from her newest video "Weight loss update and torrid haul!!!". It's at 13:29
 
What was she talking about it today’s video, ”put your cover on?”

She was talking about how she felt depressed the past few days and decided to get up and make herself put her cover on. She put on shoes, makeup...and it worked, she felt better. Is that what she calls cover?

At this point in her physical state, I figured she was talking about a new King sheet set to cover up in.
 
recently.png

In her "Really hard things to talk about" video she informs us that she doesn't think she will be curtailing her intake of diet soda "anytime recently".
Eventually, her half-asleep girlfriend in the blanket cocoon behind her manages to correct her after she can't seem to figure it out.
Poor Amber, everything must be "really hard to talk about" when you have the vocabulary skills of a stunted 10 year-old.
 
This latest video also had "crulety" (3 syllables) and "I preferred it over any"
 
I couldn't figure out where this would go so I guessed it would go here? Anyway what the fuck is Rickie and Eric's other dog's name? They have Trixie, but what's the other's name? I can't tell with Amber's garbled English. It sounds like she says Chubberdee. This has been bothering me for months.
 
In the video "My dieticians rules for me" at 7:47 she says, "I haven't gone into "grave" detail. Grave detail? Then at 8:33 she says, "Without going into "grave" detail. She has funerals on her mind.
 
Bunny said:
I couldn't figure out where this would go so I guessed it would go here? Anyway what the fuck is Rickie and Eric's other dog's name? They have Trixie, but what's the other's name? I can't tell with Amber's garbled English. It sounds like she says Chubberdee. This has been bothering me for months.
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I believe this pup’s name is simply “chubs”, “chubberdee” is just a nickname, but I could be wrong. It might be the other way around.

Trixie is the real star of the house. I don’t pay much attention to the rest. JK nothing in that house has much personality.

I always think of Gullom saying “We wants it, we needs it. Must have the precious. They stole it from us. Sneaky little hobbitses. Wicked, TRIXIE, false!”

I know it’a actually “tricksy”, but I always think of that. I’m not sure why other than being :dumb:/:autism:
 
found a few gems from her donald trump video

-"Things have been said, things have been done, this world is in an outroar."

-"The reason why I did not go purposely, by myself as a person, go physically vote for Hillary Clinton is because--I could be wrong, could be rumors, it could be Hillary lying again--was because she agrees with nine month abortions. Again, I could be wrong, but I physically saw her say it herself."

-“People who are burning the flag and doing all these crimes and all this just madness, they’re upset that Donald Trump is president because his character and the way that he is as a person. And they think he’s sexist, racist, whatever, we all know this already. But the things that these people are doing—if anything, is actually the same in level of worseness—do you get what I’m saying? Racism, burning the flag…that’s pretty equal in my opinion.”
 
Scarboroughgirl said:
found a few gems from her donald trump video

-"Things have been said, things have been done, this world is in an outroar."

-"The reason why I did not go purposely, by myself as a person, go physically vote for Hillary Clinton is because--I could be wrong, could be rumors, it could be Hillary lying again--was because she agrees with nine month abortions. Again, I could be wrong, but I physically saw her say it herself."

-“People who are burning the flag and doing all these crimes and all this just madness, they’re upset that Donald Trump is president because his character and the way that he is as a person. And they think he’s sexist, racist, whatever, we all know this already. But the things that these people are doing—if anything, is actually the same in level of worseness—do you get what I’m saying? Racism, burning the flag…that’s pretty equal in my opinion.”
Click to expand...

So stupid, but this is all I could think of....
giphy.gif
 
Scarboroughgirl said:
-"The reason why I did not go purposely, by myself as a person, go physically vote for Hillary Clinton is because--I could be wrong, could be rumors, it could be Hillary lying again--was because she agrees with nine month abortions. Again, I could be wrong, but I physically saw her say it herself."
Click to expand...

This has been quoted before but it deserves the spotlight again.

This paragraph of staggeringly incoherent, inchoate, maundering word jamble is somehow both a perfect distillation of Amber's mental maladroitness and yet also a breathtakingly beautiful utterance. Frustrated writers: imagine coming up with that paragraph for your mentally deluded fat lesbian character.
 
Scarboroughgirl said:
found a few gems from her donald trump video

-"Things have been said, things have been done, this world is in an outroar."

-"The reason why I did not go purposely, by myself as a person, go physically vote for Hillary Clinton is because--I could be wrong, could be rumors, it could be Hillary lying again--was because she agrees with nine month abortions. Again, I could be wrong, but I physically saw her say it herself."

-“People who are burning the flag and doing all these crimes and all this just madness, they’re upset that Donald Trump is president because his character and the way that he is as a person. And they think he’s sexist, racist, whatever, we all know this already. But the things that these people are doing—if anything, is actually the same in level of worseness—do you get what I’m saying? Racism, burning the flag…that’s pretty equal in my opinion.”
Click to expand...


What the fuck did I just read?? (Not in regards to your post but those quotes)
 
CreedenceLeonoreGielgud said:
This has been quoted before but it deserves the spotlight again.

This paragraph of staggeringly incoherent, inchoate, maundering word jamble is somehow both a perfect distillation of Amber's mental maladroitness and yet also a breathtakingly beautiful utterance. Frustrated writers: imagine coming up with that paragraph for your mentally deluded fat lesbian character.
Click to expand...
Using fancy words doesn’t make you a good writer.

You actively exclude people who want to read it, but most people don’t understand it.

A good writer knows how to describe stuff.
Easily. Understandable. Words.

But one DOES sound like a pretentious prick, that’s for sure!
 
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