"Shoplifter" is really underselling the story here.
You ain't kidding.
I had been expecting just another mouthy skip-scanner thief at Walmart, not... that. This video has everything from violent assault, to child neglect, and the baboon is actively incubating another chimp throughout.
- drunk, half-empty mixed drink in console
- car smells of weed, weed detritus found throughout
- bites cops repeatedly
- taunts cops as "
gettin' AIDS and all dat sheeit" from said bites
- claims schizophrenia and bipolar disorder
- expired license
- multiple violent assaults
- shoplifting from the same (sex) store and getting caught on consecutive days
- "her placenta is low" (WTF?)
- five months pregnant
- attempted vehicular homicide
- five-year-old refers to grandfather as "G-paw"
- she "
can't breeve" ← This is the Free Space on the Bingo card
- claims to be a "free citizen", so a sovcit of some type
- threatens to make a "citizen's arrest" (while cuffed and hooded)
- her name is "Daviona"
- later tries to bite an officer while she's strapped to a hospital bed! Literally snaps at him like a dog
- threatens repeatedly to murder both cops and nurses
- later found to also be on coke, fent, and heroin
And after all of that, she received a deferred sentence. No initial prison time at all.
Oh , and this hominid has a nursing license, apparently. Sheeit, when I get old, never mind the nursing home; just leave me up on a mountain somewhere and the wolves will figure out what to do with me.