💬 Off-Topic A-logging Phil/ADF - He's worse than Hitler and has twice as many testicles

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I hope Phil turns his life around, gets a steady job, gets all of his stupid tattoos removed, gets a humble little house, gets his anger issues under control, drops the tranny latino latinx lesbian whateverthefuck Tumblr gimmick, reconciles with his parents and overall family/friends, controls his insatiable libido, gets some decent dental work done, gets all his health problems taken care of, and settles down with a nice woman he knows and has a couple kids while he's at it.

...Then, have a batshit insane homeless burglar rape and murder all his family, friends and kids, draw a bunch of dicks with a tattoo ink + needle all over his face, burn down his house, rape him and give him 3 different STDs, hit him in the mouth with a hammer until all his teeth are gone, rape him some more until his Libido goes nuts again and all his anger issues surface back in the manifestation of hatred for this burglar, and then shoot him in the head with a sawed off shot gun and through his gory remains in a deep, deep lake.

chill out NSA, it's just a prank
 
There should be an ADF brand of vodka, because he's the purest possible distillation of a potato.
 
I hope that a surgeon eventually agrees to remove Phil's testicles, only to then attach them to his face while he's under.
 
I hope Phil gets locked in a sweltering basement full of potatoes so he could rot with the potatoes and create the most heinous weapons-grade gas ever used by Australatina military police.
 
I hope phils small penis and very still attatched balls gets infected and fall off and he has no money for food and that he is hungry and that he eats them like a very small wee willy winkie sausage and two eggs and uses his own blood over them like ketchup.

And then he chokes on it and dies.
 
I hope Phil tries to build a drug empire like Tony Montana, and it ends like Tony Montana's.
"Say hello to my little friend!"
*removes pants*
 
I hope Phil gets his back shaved...

...by Kylie Brooks.

...with a 250 horsepower riding lawnmower.
added my own contribution.

Also, if you were to squirt a 1 gallon douchebag into his anus, 189 gallons of douche would squirt out of his mouth.

Oh, before I forget: He's got three testicles, and each is as big and dense as golfballs. His ballsack is the size of a grapefruit and as hairy as Don King's scalp.

Phil Delicatessen Ayurveda Whorel Orroyo Juanito Jingleheimer Smoot his name is my name tooooo needs to get his name official changed back to his real name of Brent Shoebridge, get back to his home in Connecticut so he can take over the family business: Shoebridge Designer Mayonnaise, Inc.
This "Hipster" phase has gotten out of hand.

I hope his ass gets so crusty from all the grime and shit and it plugs him up while he keeps eating and he'll have to try but will ultimately fail to purify himself in the waters of Lake Minnetonka.
First off, that would kill all the fish everything in Lake Minnetonka.
Secondly, Prince will STILL not fuck him even if Phil did purify himself in Lake Minnetonka.
Thirdly, That's not Lake Minnetonka.


EDIT:
P.S. Phil should wipe his ass with 60 grit sandpaper....and never stop wiping. Even if he gets all the way up to his neck.
 
I hope Phil drinks WD-40 and then his bowels get extra loose so that he constantly shits himself until he is very dehydrated and then dies and then is body is taken to prison where it is raped and then chopped up into dog food and then a dog eats it and then throws it up and then a raccoon eats it and then the raccoon dies because it is rabid.
 
I don't know how we can A-Log Taters any more than what Reality itself is already doing to him. He's homeless, in poor health, and despised by all. Eventually, the other bums will take care of the problem for us.
 
I want to treat Phil to Sizzler. :(
 
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