623-36-4798

  • Want to keep track of this thread?
    Accounts can bookmark posts, watch threads for updates, and jump back to where you stopped reading.
    Create account
1766566720794.png
 
So I'm listening to the videos she put up on Youtube yesterday or the day before. I think I'm starting to understand her schizophrenia though I do think its a coping mechanism for personal trauma. I think the two "cats" that she keeps mentioning - Momma Meow and the other one - might represent a child or children she aborted in her past relationship. She seems to blur the lines between children and cats and dogs. Kind of like some sort of avatars she's created. I also think that the person she thinks she's talking to in her Youtube videos is an actual delusion that represents both an ex of hers and some man who abused her when she was a child. That's why she keeps accusing him of killing her baby cats(i.e. forcing her to get an abortion) and why she says a lot of the really messed up stuff that doesn't make sense. The guy she thinks she's talking to(who she accuses of saving and recording...) is this avatar of the men who abused her and her brain has him talk to her kind of like how your brain thinks when you're slightly awake but still mostly asleep. Like you know how you have a lot of irrational thoughts where you connect things together while mostly asleep or even in dreams? Well, this part of her mind is wearing the mask of her former abuser and she's arguing with him and this is making her also mentally groggy at the same time.

So there's some prick out there who abused a scizo girl and fucked her up so badly that she's basically spending much of her life arguing with a strawman of him. She thinks he's hearing her through her videos which is why the videos sound like an argument one would have in a dream and not content that's meant for a wider audience. I don't think therapy could help her with this issue only because therapists don't want to address the root issues(forced abortion and molestation) that cause her to be the way she is. California fights hard to protect abusers. She needs to accept that she was harmed in the past by some loser(s) who are no longer part of her life. Some anti-psycotic medication might be able to help her but she needs to seek that out. It would at least shut up the annoying voice of the guy she's arguing with.

Anyway, hope she can overcome this fight but its a fight that only she can win.
 
I also think that the person she thinks she's talking to in her Youtube videos is an actual delusion that represents both an ex of hers and some man who abused her when she was a child.
Is his name "Jack"? Because that's her ex-husband, who fled for greener pastures many moons ago, at the start of the original thread. She accused him of many nasty horrible things which were not at all believable. Poor bastard.

Anyhoo

Hark the Herald Angels Sing

Hark, the herald Angels sing,
Glory to the newborn King!
Peace on earth and mercy mild,
God and sinners reconciled!
Joyful, all ye nations rise,
Join the triumph of the skies,
With Angelic host proclaim,
Christ is born in Bethlehem!
Hark, the herald Angels sing,
Glory to the newborn King!

Christ, by highest Heav'n adored,
Christ, the everlasting Lord!
In a manger, born a King,
While adoring Angels sing,
Of peace on earth, to man goodwill,
May their tremblings all be still,
Christ, on earth has come to dwell,
Jesus, our Emmanuel!
Hark, the herald Angels sing,
Glory to the newborn King!

Hail the Heav'n-born Prince of peace,
Hail the Son of Righteousness!
Life and light to all, He brings,
Risen with healing in His wings!
Mild, He lays His glory by,
Born that man no more may die,
Born to raise the sons of earth,
Born to give them second birth,
Hark, the herald Angels sing,
Glory to the newborn King!
Hark, the herald Angels sing,
Glory to the newborn King!
 
Is his name "Jack"? Because that's her ex-husband, who fled for greener pastures many moons ago, at the start of the original thread. She accused him of many nasty horrible things which were not at all believable. Poor bastard.
Kind of like I said days or weeks ago, with paranoid people, they tend to blame an innocent party for the actions of a guilty party because its safer but it also shows everyone that there's an actual issue. Kind of like how people who are paranoid of the government may be genuine victims of malicious family members but they blame the government since its a safe proxy that allows them to express their their victimization without alerting the actual party. So I don't think its her ex husband or father who she has issues with. I think its someone else who abused her in the more distant past.

Funny thing is that she's really bad at lying. In the audio recordings I'm listening to, she denies certain things about herself that are likely true. I think the hour+ recording where she ear-raped anyone listening on headphones she denies ever doing oral. She also denies being desperate. So there are 2 things I can glean from this:
1) She is desperate.
2) She's given head.
 
Nothing's Going to Ruin My Holiday by The Vandals

This is going to be the best Christmas ever.
Everything this year's been a disaster
But I won't let it bother me at all
Nothing's going to bring me down,
It's Christmas and I'm pleased as punch
I'm going to stand my happy ground.
I refuse to let my family make me crazy
I'll smile at their insults and their frowns
I'll ignore the shitty weather
'Cause what counts is we're together
Loving, safe and sound
Nothing's going to ruin my holiday
Not this time, Ya hear?. (I won't let it happen)
And If you try to ruin my holiday-
I swear you will regret it for the rest of the fucking year.
The turkey might have made the children vomit
The tree burned down and torched up all of our gifts
But I will grin and bear it
And this nightmare we will share it
Till I get my only wish- it's
Nothing's going to ruin my holiday
No act of God or family fight
'Cause if you try to ruin my holiday
I swear you will regret it for the rest of your fucking life
You'll burn in hell with hot pokers
in your eyes and acid on your flesh
This is going to be the best Christmas ever.
Soon this crappy Christmas will be over
And I'll go right back to my pissed-off self
But until that happens I'll just continue laughing
Like one of those creepy, retard, mutant, North Pole Elves.
Nothing's going to ruin my holiday
Not this year I won't let that be the case
And If you try and ruin my holiday-
I'll punch you in your fat, disgusting, turkey eating face.
Understand me
This is going to be the best Christmas ever!
 
I Saw Three Ships


I saw three ships come sailing in,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
Saw three ships come sailing in,
On Christmas Day in the morning.

Pray, wither sailed those ships all three,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
Wither sailed those ships all three,
On Christmas Day in the morning.

O they sailed into Bethlehem,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
They sailed into Bethlehem,
On Christmas Day in the morning.

And all the bells on earth shall ring,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
All the bells on earth shall ring,
On Christmas Day in the morning.

And all the souls on earth shall sing,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
All the souls on earth shall sing,
On Christmas Day in the morning.

Then let us all rejoice again,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
Let us all rejoice again,
On Christmas Day in the morning.

I saw three ships come sailing in,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
Saw three ships come sailing in,
On Christmas Day in the morning.
On Christmas Day in the morning.
 
God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen


God rest you merry, gentlemen,
Let nothing you dismay,
Remember Christ our Savior
Was born on Christmas Day;
To save us all from Satan's power
When we were gone astray.

O tidings of comfort and joy,
Comfort and joy,
O tidings of comfort and joy!

In Bethlehem in Israel
This blessed babe was born;
And lay within a manger
Upon this blessed morn;
For which his mother Mary
Did nothing, taking scorn.

O tidings of comfort and joy,
Comfort and joy,
O tidings of comfort and joy!

From God our heavenly Father
A blessed angel came;
And unto certain shepherds
Brought tidings of the same;
How that in Bethlehem was born
The Son of God by name.

O tidings of comfort and joy,
Comfort and joy,
O tidings of comfort and joy!

Now to the Lord sing praises,
All you within this place,
And with true love and brotherhood
Each other now embrace;
The holy tide of Christmas
All other doth deface.

O tidings of comfort and joy,
Comfort and joy,
O tidings of comfort and joy!

O tidings of comfort and joy,
Comfort and joy,
O tidings of comfort and joy!
 
Another personal favourite:

Good King Wenceslas looked out
On the Feast of Stephen
When the snow lay round about
Deep and crisp and even
Brightly shone the moon that night
Though the frost was cruel
When a poor man came in sight
Gath'ring winter fuel

"Hither, page, and stand by me
If thou knows it telling:
Yonder peasant, who is he?
Where and what his dwelling?"
"Sire, he lives a good league hence
Underneath the mountain
Right against the forest fence
By Saint Agnes' fountain"

"Bring me flesh and bring me wine
Bring me pine logs hither
Thou and I will see him dine
When we bear them thither"
Page and monarch, forth they went
Forth they went together
Through the rude wind's wild lament
And the bitter weather

"Sire, the night is darker now
And the wind blows stronger
Fails my heart, I know not how
I can go no longer"
"Hark my footsteps, my good page
Tread thou in them boldly
Thou shalt find the winter's rage
Freeze thy blood less coldly"

In his master's step he trod
Where the snow lay dented
Heat was in the very sod
Which the saint had printed
Therefore, Christian men, be sure
Wealth or rank possessing
Ye who now will bless the poor
Shall yourselves find blessing

Both The Irish Rovers and especially Loreena McKennitt sing a great version of this.
 
Back
Top Bottom