💬 Off-Topic [6 Dec 18] Phil Has A Nightmare - Defends his hovel with totally bad ass gunfighting against Kiwi Operatives / Literally Shaking

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If we raided his apartment, the toxic stench would suffocate us. He has nothing to worry about since he is so toxic that he had immunity to his own stench.
 
Monolith said:
Lol, he thinks he'd catch us.
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Of all the videos of Phil out there, none show this fatass actually running. Now, if we're to say actually invade Phil's hovel, and we got away with something precious to him, I believe we would be able to outrun him, hell, we wouldn't even need a getaway car. If Phil can actually run, he probably runs like Chris does, with the added benefit of tripping over those trenched feet of his. So long story short, we have nothing to worry about because we will be long gone before fatass decides to start running for us.
 
Tragi-Chan said:
Maybe his body could be sold as pig feed, but that’s the best I can think of.
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These poor animals don't deserve such a cruel treatment.
Better force-feed his body to the captured trannies and observe the results Mengele style.
 
I'm already working on the screenplay. This'll be the hit action movie of 2020.

Of course it's not complete without an all-star cast:

Vin Diesel as Philip Delici aka Izzy Hell
Willem Dafoe as Null
Danny Devito as Toren
Carmen Electra as Xochi
John Cena as Ravenor
And Danny Mcbride as Mexican nieghbor
 
MasterDisaster said:
I'm already working on the screenplay. This'll be the hit action movie of 2020.

Of course it's not complete without an all-star cast:

Vin Diesel as Philip Delici aka Izzy Hell
Willem Dafoe as Null
Danny Devito as Toren
Carmen Electra as Xochi
John Cena as Ravenor
And Danny Mcbride as Mexican nieghbor
Click to expand...
I’d have represented Phil using practical special effects, like the blob monster from Weird Science.
 
nvrwastetree said:
Of all the videos of Phil out there, none show this fatass actually running. Now, if we're to say actually invade Phil's hovel, and we got away with something precious to him, I believe we would be able to outrun him, hell, we wouldn't even need a getaway car. If Phil can actually run, he probably runs like Chris does, with the added benefit of tripping over those trenched feet of his. So long story short, we have nothing to worry about because we will be long gone before fatass decides to start running for us.
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While true we could do a grab and run and get a block and a half away before he could waddle down the stairs. It'd be a waste of a perfectly good Race War van, hell if he made it to the street we could pop her in reverse and see how fast he can run! Only down side would be having to wash the mashed potato off the bumper. But hey that what car washes are for.
 
DumbCWCQuote said:
While true we could do a grab and run and get a block and a half away before he could waddle down the stairs. It'd be a waste of a perfectly good Race War van, hell if he made it to the street we could pop her in reverse and see how fast he can run! Only down side would be having to wash the mashed potato off the bumper. But hey that what car washes are for.
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We could clean it using the tears of those who mourn for - actually, yeah, the car wash.
 
Lol @ 'I had a nightmare so give me money'. Not sure I can think of a more pathetic attempt at ebegging. Of course, Phil makes sure to say that the money is solely for his morale, so you know it's nothing important.
 
MasterDisaster said:
I'm already working on the screenplay. This'll be the hit action movie of 2020.

Of course it's not complete without an all-star cast:

Vin Diesel as Philip Delici aka Izzy Hell
Click to expand...

Are you kidding? This guy would be more accurate.

Laurence R. Harvey.

iu
 
Mr. Isaboy REALLY wants people (especially us) to believe he owns firearms. He even goes as far as taking photos of BB guns and airsoft toys (the cheapest ones available no less) to try to pass them off as real. He seems to get like this when he's feeling particularly powerless and ignored.

Pro tip: we all know Phil is too poor due to the evil Capitalist system to be able to afford real firearms.

And if anyone decided to invade Phil's home it would be an absolute cake walk. He is not only a weakling and a pushover, but he's also chicken-shit and would freeze up and shit himself if someone busted in, making him an easy target. If anyone actually wanted him dead, he'd be in Commie Poseur Hell by now. Stop playing the victim, Mr. Isaboy. No one cares enough about you to kill you. Not even us.
 
He failed to prevent a single elderly fat alcoholic from invading his bedroom, so what are the chances that he could stop a force of heavily-armed Kiwi agents?
 
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