💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Archie_Kimkicker]

I may not be a capital G gamer but the new COD looks like every other shooter. What is he mad about?

He's not incorrect, but it's not like he knows what makes a game legitimately good.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

his grills are all covered and sitting outside on his deck

he'd be able to fit some of them in his garage if it wasn't full of as seen on TV junk

Except he claims to have given away most of them.

Probably uses them once, never bothers to clean them and then just wheels it to the street with a sign. "free grill" on it and some schmuck comes and takes it because hey, free grill.

 

[Aaway]

stroke brain has memory problems. this is from the latest fat on the go video

also, lol

 

[AnOminous]

Oh god, I'm turning into jack. Ive got a 6burner gas, charcoal kettle, smoker and a portable Weber q. Lord deliver me from this evil

If you can use even one of them to produce something edible you aren't turning into Jack.

 

[GloriousRapeRabbit]

lmao she's fixing to kill him, I just know it.

Nobody will blame you Tammy. NOBODY! You have dealt with this shit too long....and Jacks pitiful existance is only painful. Set him free Tammy, and by doing so also free yourself.

 

[captkrisma]

Jr...no one gives a shit that you went to get a pedicure with your wife.

 

[Archie_Kimkicker]

LMFAO. How many times will she say this before she throws in the towel. Tammy Jr. is Dad Bod's therapist.

 

[DontEatThat]

"If you live by peoples acceptance, you will die from their rejection."

Seems his wife was trying to tell him that flexing about the dumbest shit in your life (ie, having a job and being married) and vanity muscles to the internet is a futile effort.

 

[Sasha]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=Gm5UYyx54MA

I watched a few videos of him at the beginning of the thread, and told myself "wow, that's a lot a pages, if he's still alive, then he must have improved a lot in cooking, or invented nice concepts !"
then immediately stumbled on this. I lol'd.

 

[JackIsBlack]

Jr...no one gives a shit that you went to get a pedicure with your wife.

Did you mean to include a picture?

 

[Inside_Ventura]

Jr got his feet done

 

[Hassa_Bussa]

Another relaxing video from Robert.

 

[Schmuck of Ages]

LMFAO. How many times will she say this before she throws in the towel. Tammy Jr. is Dad Bod's therapist.

View attachment 2516747

Apparrently this is from some other Christoan rapper named Lecrae. I doubt Brianna is this...pithy I guess.

 

[Aaway]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=4xznwRepyPY
Another relaxing video from Robert.

very comfy video

i took that video as rob taking a giant shit on jack for not being able to walk more than a few steps without needing a scooter or wheelchair

 

[captkrisma]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=4xznwRepyPY
Another relaxing video from Robert.

Rob shows us that he not only walks far more than Jack, but that he's a more skilled musician than Jr, having performed in front of a willing audience. He also plays drums, so he can keep a rhythm as well. Rob is pretty great, guys.

 

[rubytintedchix]

The irony of Jack posting this shortly after is not lost on me.

 

[Helvítis Túristi]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=4xznwRepyPY
Another relaxing video from Robert.

"I heard it on the internet, so it must be true" Is this a jab at Jack's facebook politics?

 

[Fatty2988]

Rob really is my favorite character in the Scalfaniverse

 

[Pig Cups]

Honestly that makes me wonder why he won't eat at the Heart Attack Grill while he's in Vegas, since some of his recipes have more calories, fat and salt than the Quadruple Bypass Burger.

As was mentioned, he wants us to believe that he’s being a responsible, admirable adult and dieting. Regardless of the fact that his broadcasted behavior proves otherwise, he still likes to cling to the idea because there are some (few, but some) people who believe he’s actually dieting, and he likes feeling that he’s above them. That’s the choir he’s preaching to in the hopes of getting asspats to have SOMETHING to feel good about. Going to the HAG would shatter that poorly constructed image even among that strongly autistic, yet important audience.

I mean, I could see him going, just not videotaping it (shit, I’m planning on going when I take my upcoming first trip to Vegas). He’s just a little self-conscious to tape himself exhibiting embarrassing behavior, which is strange when you consider how much of that he’s already put out there. HAG just thrives on a certain type of embarrassing, though. I assume Jack would weigh in in the hopes of getting free food, and those who qualify are basically notified of that in front of the whole restaurant- the scale is elevated in the middle of the dining room and is hooked up to a loud alarm. The owner claims that it’s like that by design, to embarrass the patron and coax them into seeing the error of their ways. The guy even says that giving someone a heart attack is doing them a service, as it’ll motivate them to be more health-conscious and wary of their lifestyle. The “well-meaning” M.O. of this guy is so dark, yet perfect. It’s just a cover for his true intentions which are to make money and laugh at deathfats. Pure marketing genius.

I've gotten in the habit now of imagining every Jack and Tammy picture on FB being used for the inevitable "So sad to announce Jack is being hospitalized for COVID-19 complications" post three months from now.

Part of me feels that they would keep a Jack COVID hospitalization quiet out of fear of this thread’s reaction, but nah- these people are so shameless and narcissistic (not to mention christfags that unironically believe in prayer) that they’d keep us up to date. Those FaceBook follies are so predictable and follow a common trajectory, as I’ve noticed having read through a bunch of them:

1.) “So-and-so is in the ICU with COVID. Not on a vent just regular 02 cannula, yay! Prayers plz.”

-several days of good progress reports follow-

2.) “So-and-so didn’t have a good night. The 02 levels keep falling. Prayers plz.”

3.) “Prayers plz. So-and-so took a turn for the worse. Intubation was the best option (more copium and reminisces). Prayers plz again.”

-several days of sometimes stable, sometimes worsening condition updates-

4.) “So-and-so’s 02 levels are still in bad shape, even with the vent at full power. They’re going to try ECMO for the best chance of survival. Prayers plz.”

5.) “So-and-so went home to be with jeebus.”

 

[abobe]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=4xznwRepyPY
Another relaxing video from Robert.

I was little skeptical of Rob always goofing on Jack, but this just confirmed for me that he is well aware of what he's doing. Rob also unironically makes good content.