DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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Attention fellow DSP fans: I was told by confidential mod Discord sources that if we don't tip Phil for a month straight it triggers a secret Level 2 Marathon Stream of Sonic the Hedgehog games where Phil wears the Sonic hat AND eats chili dogs. Please join me in withholding tips to unlock this achievement!
 
TheKatIsNowGone said:
I wonder if CM Punk's return (outside of WWE no less) will interest DSP? I don't know if a tryhard WWE mark like DSP could handle watching AEW.
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As far as I know Phil has never watched AEW because he doesn't have TNT and is honestly too stupid to figure out how to find a restream or torrent an episode. He also claims Stone Cold is his favorite wrestler not CM Punk despite not even watching wrestling when Stone Cold was active. That must be why he modeled his haircut and facial hair after Punk and even has that autographed CM Punk plaque, because he isn't his favorite wrestler dood!

Also, for some reason DSP likes to to publicly look down on wrestling now and claims he doesn't watch it. This might be an attempt to divert any attention or plausibility that he still plays WWE Champions. "Uhh dood I dont even watch wrestling anymore why the fuck would I play a wrestling mobile game? *snort*" He still at least has wrestling stuff in his twitter feed because he mentioned in a prestream a few days ago that WWE fired a bunch of jobbers. But if someone asks a wrestling related question in chat he acts dismissive and reminds everyone he doesn't care about wrestling anymore. Make senses doesn't it?
 
Still catching up on stuff after the place got DDoS'd (welcome back, fellow tards and tard watchers), but Piggy's going to play Hades? That should lead to some tasty salt. Even though it's a rogue-lite, the early levels will kick your ass until you earn enough darkness to get some lives and health, and the game relies on you having both decent reflexes and pattern recognition to fight the monsters while avoiding their attacks and traps, two things Phil avoids like they're the plague. While he can try to cheese the homing bow, it working at its best requires good timing to hit the dash attack properly and not get steam rolled in the meantime. Not to mention that trying to go for certain builds also depends on you putting time into the game unlocking and leveling the various trinkets, and even then there's still an element of luck as to whether the game rolls the powers you need. In other words, he'll turn on God Mode as soon as the game prompts him (which is after 3 or 5 deaths, I think) and then quit when he finally face tanks his way through the last boss for the first time, even though that's barely the start of the game. And that's if he doesn't freak out at the dating mechanics! Ok they're not really dating mechanics but giving ambrosia to people always had that sort of feel to me, and if he figures out that Zag and/or Achilles are bi, he'll probably lose his shit.
 
Zappin’ And Spazzin’ said:
Only Darksydephil can tell people that he's at risk of losing his house and then tell everyone he's planning on getting a haircut with his wife
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That haircut story of his is bonkers. I will note that I do get my hair cut quite often, once a month, because I'm a twat and want to look a certain way.
With Phil I don't see why he would do it so often, more so because he keeps crying poor and he really doesn't want to look good for his viewers. Bloke could just go for his old buzz cut, or just ignore it since we've already seen him with far longer hair. I don't want to claim he's getting his hair dyed, but the frequent visits are weird. However it could be that because he is a limp dicked reprobate, he could say "we" because Katherine is going and he has to follow her around because he knows she might pull a Leanna and realise she is wasting her life away.
Or maybe he just goes to his barber so he gets told how he isn't balding and has a full set of glorious hair so he gets his little fragile ego buff and the barber gets an easy tenner.
 
Nigel of Ukip said:
That haircut story of his is bonkers. I will note that I do get my hair cut quite often, once a month, because I'm a twat and want to look a certain way.
With Phil I don't see why he would do it so often, more so because he keeps crying poor and he really doesn't want to look good for his viewers. Bloke could just go for his old buzz cut, or just ignore it since we've already seen him with far longer hair. I don't want to claim he's getting his hair dyed, but the frequent visits are weird. However it could be that because he is a limp dicked reprobate, he could say "we" because Katherine is going and he has to follow her around because he knows she might pull a Leanna and realise she is wasting her life away.
Or maybe he just goes to his barber so he gets told how he isn't balding and has a full set of glorious hair so he gets his little fragile ego buff and the barber gets an easy tenner.
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I honestly think he would do himself a favor if he just let his hair grow out for a bit age isn’t doing him any favors
 
This excuse of Phil going with Kat to get hair cuts is BS, women get their hair cut way less than men. This is Kat being dragged along with Phil to the hair dresser.

It wouldn't surprise me if it was to cover up grey hair.
 
Swirling weeb said:
I honestly think he would do himself a favor if he just let his hair grow out for a bit age isn’t doing him any favors
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Specially if he's so skint and can't even pay his bills. Personally if I was Phil I would just do a very short buzz cut, might as well accept it and get it over with. Going bald isn't a big deal because it happens to so many men. Yes it's hard to accept, but it's not a game over. I even see birds with really awful hairlines or thinning hair.
I think however Phil's head is really fucking awfully shaped due to his parents being exceptional. As such he will protect his little greasy hair and patchy beard for as long as he possibly can. I mean fuck me mate, imagine this melon being bald and clean shaven.

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kebab4you said:
It's going to be interesting to see what his goal will be on Saturday, he had to make tip goal all streams this week or he would have to do the "marathon". Doubt he will set the goal according to this formula though: 150*2*4 (maybe 6 if Sunday+Saturday of previous week) minus tips earned during the week
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Math is forbidden.
If Phil wanted to be transparent he would just say what amount he needs between now and Sunday. But he thrives off of obscurity so that whatever he says can't be held against him in the future. His mortgage "is a big payment", if we hit the tips every day "[he] should be good," there are a lot of unspecified "bills" coming due, etc.
 
Nigel of Ukip said:
Specially if he's so skint and can't even pay his bills. Personally if I was Phil I would just do a very short buzz cut, might as well accept it and get it over with. Going bald isn't a big deal because it happens to so many men. Yes it's hard to accept, but it's not a game over. I even see birds with really awful hairlines or thinning hair.
I think however Phil's head is really fucking awfully shaped due to his parents being exceptional. As such he will protect his little greasy hair and patchy beard for as long as he possibly can. I mean fuck me mate, imagine this melon being bald and clean shaven.

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His fucking face is so puffy and I don't just mean fat, his mouth must be constantly inflamed.
 
Nigel of Ukip said:
Specially if he's so skint and can't even pay his bills. Personally if I was Phil I would just do a very short buzz cut, might as well accept it and get it over with. Going bald isn't a big deal because it happens to so many men. Yes it's hard to accept, but it's not a game over. I even see birds with really awful hairlines or thinning hair.
I think however Phil's head is really fucking awfully shaped due to his parents being exceptional. As such he will protect his little greasy hair and patchy beard for as long as he possibly can. I mean fuck me mate, imagine this melon being bald and clean shaven.

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Is the first one photoshopped or something? It looks so fucked up.
 
We Are The Witches said:
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Posted by @ReentryPhantom
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Quite frankly this would probably be his best look, maybe ditch the shitty goatee and switch to the Imperial Van Dyke like so. It allows him to shave the areas that don't grow and plays in to the whole "King" shtick he does. He doesn't have an office job, the sky should be the limit on playing with his appearance.


van-dyke-beard-1.jpg



He's as bad at grooming as he is at video games.
 
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