DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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I love how the mid-stream beg tweet used to be a thing we lost our shit at months ago because it showed how completely desperate he was on the streams where he did it, but in the past few weeks it's become just another daily occurrence on his streams.

Also, happy Independence Day to all my burger-munching friends on here.
 
ALERT! ALERT!

With yesterday's slow stream and $865 out of the 6 streams since introducing the $150 goal, the average amount of tips per stream has fallen BELOW the $150 threshold. Goddamnit, paypigs, why are you letting this happen? This is UNACCEPTABLE! DSP needs help with tips now more than EVER this month.

It's only this month, you guys, just this one time. After this, he'll be good to go and everything will go back to normal, I swear!
 
Haven't seen it posted yet, so for those who may have missed it:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=kD4alxTFBfsThis motherfucker is seriously complaining that the food he just cooked is hot lmao.
Holy shit he actually looks like he's gonna cry LMAO

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I'll just say it again, what a sad and pathetic existence to have your life revolve around food and gacha.
 
"It's not Italian flavours, there is no tomato flavour or oregano!"

Fuck me this is gold dust. Bet they didn't ask you to pour a cup of sugar in either eh?
Part of me wishes he'd have enough money to visit his ancestral homeland Italy just so he can have his legs and arms broken after he tells some Neapolitan pizzeria owner that his pizza isn't authentic Itahlien enough and that it's too bland.
 
Part of me wishes he'd have enough money to visit his ancestral homeland Italy just so he can have his legs and arms broken after he tells some Neapolitan pizzeria owner that his pizza isn't authentic Itahlien enough and that it's too bland.
You think he'd book the correct flight when he can't identify Italy on the map? He'd goat-laugh that that isn't the correct destination and point to England instead.
 
UHHH DOOOD this pizza only has tomato sauce on it? It's whut poor fishermen ate? Bullshit uhuhuh Italy has been Americanized!
 
This Italian chef would murder Phil if he tried to order Americanized Fettucine Alfredo in Italy.

Vincenzo is also a real hard ass about Neapolitan pizza.
 
Haven't seen it posted yet, so for those who may have missed it:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=kD4alxTFBfsThis motherfucker is seriously complaining that the food he just cooked is hot lmao.
The SALT in this rant is what happens when you can't scam $150 for gatcha and Doordash and your Mom Wife doesnt cook your burgers for you

''Im very upset'' :story: Phil having to feed himself is now a bonefide detractor
 
You think he'd book the correct flight when he can't identify Italy on the map? He'd goat-laugh that that isn't the correct destination and point to England instead.
He would travel to England and get pissed off at them for telling him that it is not Italy. English people would then be right next to blacks and asians on his list of his most hated types of people.
 
Part of me wishes he'd have enough money to visit his ancestral homeland Italy just so he can have his legs and arms broken after he tells some Neapolitan pizzeria owner that his pizza isn't authentic Itahlien enough and that it's too bland.
Phil is definitely the type of guy who would go to another country and complain about there being too many foreigners there
 
So he made $166 in tips on the Fallgout stream, but only $60 on Dan-gout-ronpa. That's $226 for the day, plus all the superchat money he got. Under the old goal he'd be above the $200 he wants every day, but now that it's $300 and he "ONLY" made $60 on the night stream, so it's a disappointing night of slow support that completely erases the "positive support" he got earlier.

I love his insistence of "YOU GUYS wanted to see this, and we're so close to the end, so we have to keep playing it to reach the end". I'm sure the $50 tips from Pastricucky have nothing to do with it. Why do you actually care so much about finishing a game after Divinity 2?
 
I love how the mid-stream beg tweet used to be a thing we lost our shit at months ago because it showed how completely desperate he was on the streams where he did it, but in the past few weeks it's become just another daily occurrence on his streams.

Also, happy Independence Day to all my burger-munching friends on here.
Was thinking about stuff like this the other day. Remember the first black shirt begging video and how it was unbelievable that Phil sunk so low? Now that's his daily pitch to entice people to watch his stream.
 
I love that Kat has just given up on cooking for him. It's all frozen and processed foods now, unless she makes egg salad. She doesn't even make her famous custom homemade tuna casserole anymore. You can tell it's getting to him from that rant, maybe even having a bit of contempt for her at this point. At least he has another excuse to eat out more often now. How's that married life treating you, Phil? Is it everything you dreamed of?
 
He is so out of touch with reality that he has to complain about making Hamburger Helper. Hamburger Helper... Something that single moms routinely do. All he had to say was "Yeah we had some Hamburger Helper and it took longer than I wanted it to and it wasn't very good." Instead, we get some weird spiel about the whole process, and a review on a food that isn't supposed to be a luxury.... Really fucking weird.
 
Hi All! Hope the site is getting back to normal and enjoying the geocities 1998-ish wallpaper and majestic eagle. 'Murica!

I noticed OiC trying to get attention again, so, like a good person, I decided to help him:

View attachment 2315193

You're welcome, buddy!
Hahaha don't worry, I edited what he said. Since this guy wants so bad his messages to be posted here, I decide to 'adjust' a little bit the content of said messages.

If OiC has a problem with it, just make an account here and talk directly to us.

Edit: It's kinda fun, not gonna lie
View attachment 2315248
I think your edited message is actually believable lol. Only Ingests Cum really has a chubby for Dave.
Thank You! Best whale pic in awhile.
So is he having a good time or struggling with tips? I love his double talk and noticed after he spent all 45 minutes awhile ago of no need to mention tips again, he is getting worse than usually with guilt tripping. Either there's a new champions event or the CT midfirst stuff might be on his mind. Don't know if they'll get everything, but laugh at the thought Dave might be shaking in his chair uncontrollably.
 
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He is so out of touch with reality that he has to complain about making Hamburger Helper. Hamburger Helper... Something that single moms routinely do. All he had to say was "Yeah we had some Hamburger Helper and it took longer than I wanted it to and it wasn't very good." Instead, we get some weird spiel about the whole process, and a review on a food that isn't supposed to be a luxury.... Really fucking weird.
Here's the thing - contrary to popular belief, DSP is a complete moron and a gullible faggot. If the box says 'gourmet', 'delicious' or anything like that, common sense goes out of the window. He genuinely expects that 0.99$ shit to be good. You can see that with his iconic DSP Tries It Ramen Noodles. ((off-topic) 0.99$ Ramen Noodles can be amazing if you put some extra effort, add some veggies, stir fry that shit etc.)

This borderline subhuman behavior is a result of him growing up as a pampered manbaby and becoming a pampered manchild. This is the same mentality that leads him to believe that expensive things are better by design than more affordable stuff. It's this sort of weird "i live in a video game" mentality, where you get a super-simplified view of the world.
 
Yeah, Phil's been gradually escalating the begging and the breaks to unreasonable amounts. Believe it or not, when I started watching Phil he was "Only" doing hour long prestreams with no piss-and-shit-break after it, and going off camera to do a whale call for five minutes was pretty much unthinkable. He was also playing stuff his fans at least more or less wanted to see.

It's Phil's attempt at scrubbing out the detractor community. He plays only boring shit. After the adrenaline shot that was VF5US there's been absolutely nothing worth watching. It's two sports games for kids played on very easy, an action platformer for kids, an old visual novel for weebs with a surly drunk reading aloud, Mass Effect played on Hard rather than Insanity, when it's already a notoriously easy game on Insanity, and the most interesting development is how he refuses to pick receding hairline hair for his avatars, instead making Chad Burnell on Mass Effect and Soyfaced Old Man Mii, but still with pretty good hair. Hell, the Mii hair selection even had his receding mop, and he said it was a "George Constanza" hairline and chose the buzzcut instead.

In Phil's head, there truly is a silent majority of people who love him and his streams, and are willing to toss their wallets at him. In reality, most of the viewers are heavily involved in the detractor community, either because they are a part of it, or because they want to spite it for being mean cyberboolies. You don't just build your reputation on ten years of infamy and suddenly do the hokey pokey, turn yourself around and become a gouty, ugly, scrubby version of Maximilian Dood. Phil legitimately thinks his incessant begging isn't a problem. He's been trying to improve himself by removing what he perceived to be the problem, namely how he was a clueless scrub shittalking every game with 0 authority.

What we get is this. Chill N' Beg streams with plenty of breaks, absolutely shit gameplay, and a ton of ACKTION PAHCKED children's games like Bugsnax and Ratchet N' Snatchet. I said it when Anonymouse shot him through the heart, but it really felt like the end of an era. Now Phil's been yeeted to youtube, where he tries to rally his last 100 or so viewers and 10 or so whales into supporting his lifestyle for the next 20 years, while providing absolutely nothing of value in return. As for us, I guess we'll still watch when he does something like Virtua Fighter, but even a death-ridden playthrough like New Vegas where Phil just struggles to get by on constant savestates is eliciting exactly 0 attention. Not even us pay attention to his gameplay outside of specific titles like fighting games.

Chill Beggar Phil is an all sideshow, no meat lolcow. If he keeps this up he'll be streaming to just the whales soon enough.
 
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