🐱 Biden Issues Presidential Proclamation, It Is VROOM VROOM BEEP BEEP!

Biden Issues Presidential Proclamation, It Is VROOM VROOM BEEP BEEP!

Better than anything the last loser ever said.

www.wonkette.com

Joe Biden is the president of the United States, and he is such a self-proclaimed "car guy" that The Onion has been making gabillions of dollars selling shirtless posters of him washing his Trans Am for years. (Shut up, Wonkette, we don't know how The Onion makes its money.)

And that guy went to Michigan today to tell the American people that fuck you, shut up, don't tell me I can't drive anymore just because I'm the president, you shut your mouth with that malarkey, I'll fuck you up, VROOM VROOM BEEP BEEP, God bless America. (OK, maybe that is neither an exact quote nor a presidential proclamation. But it should be.)

Look at this guy test-driving the new electric Ford F-150.


Sorry, it's not a very good video. It could be literally anyone driving that truck. It could be Hunter Biden's laptop driving that truck.

Here's a better shot:

And another one, from White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki. (This is your press briefing for the day, it is VROOOOOOM BEEP BEEP.)


"This sucker's quick," said the president, who had just gone VROOM VROOM.

As Car & Driver explains, the new F-150 Lightning is officially coming out tomorrow, but Biden just leaked it like a common leaker when he stood in front of it and talked to people.

See? Here he is, just standing in front of shit and leaking electric truck secrets.


Shots fired, Chevy truck owners. Shots fired.

Anyway, yeah, then he drove it.

For comparison, here is video footage of the previous president going VROOM VROOM.

Our bad, that's not what that footage was at all.

If you want to know more about Biden's trip to Detroit, read a different damn news website.

 

[W00K #17]

This reads like it was written by a genuine retard.

 

[soy_king]

This reads like it was written by a genuine retard.

Reading Wonkette makes me think the Supreme Court had it right in Buck v Bell.

 

[White Devil]

This reads like it was written by a genuine retard.

It was.

 

[Corpun]

I'm sorry what the fuck am I reading? Either I am too stupid to understand this or this journos needs his meds.

 

[The Last Stand]

This reads like it was written by a genuine retard.

Who's to say it wasn't? I got lost after the third paragraph. Are they trying to spin Biden as a car guy?

 

[Jewelsmakerguy]

I'm sorry, but who the fuck hired this incomprehensible tard?

 

[Slimy Time]

I'm sorry, but who the fuck hired this incomprehensible tard?

He's the fucking editor.

 

[Bland Crumbs]

Joe Biden is the president of the United States

Yeah...people keep saying that.

 

[Troon Destroyer]

How can these journalists still be employed? All they do is write POO POO PEE PEE AM LIBTARD DO WHAT I SAY UNCLE JOE IS OUR SAVIOUR AND IF YOU DON'T THINK LIKE THAT YOU'RE NAZI

 

[Captain Fitzbattleaxe]

Is this pro or anti Biden?

 

[mario if smoke weed]

You people know a lot about trucks!

 

[Blamo]

I got soy poisoning from the whole page.

 

[Calooby]

I didn't know a terrible excuse for "shitposting" could land someone a job. When do I start?

 

[Jewelsmakerguy]

He's the fucking editor.

Holy fuck, that's even worse. No wonder it reads like an autistic 2nd grader's report.

 

[thx1138]

Who's to say it wasn't? I got lost after the third paragraph. Are they trying to spin Biden as a car guy?

Take my hand, lean in close, we'll find our way through this nightmare maze of a post, somehow, together. (meaning I couldn't figure out what the fuck it was all about either. Are they trying to spin Biden as a "cool guy", by creating a forced meme? Mocking him? Something something pickup truck?! TLS, get me my glucose tablets, I'm going to faint again.)

 

[The Last Stand]

Take my hand, lean in close, we'll find our way through this nightmare maze of a post, somehow, together. (meaning I couldn't figure out what the fuck it was all about either. Are they trying to spin Biden as a "cool guy", by creating a forced meme? Mocking him? Something something pickup truck?! TLS, get me my glucose tablets, I'm going to faint again.)

I've read it five times over. STILL can't understand it. Im guessing it's meant to be a joke.

"See, WE are critical of Biden too!"

 

[Vic Viper T301]

Wasn't this the same day that Biden 'jokingly' said he was going to run over a reporter who asked about Israel? Jokingly. It was just a joke when the President joked about running people over and then drove away without answering a question. Vroom vroom!

 

[More AWS-8Q Than You]

I wonder how long the battery in Ford's Electric Truck boondoggle would last if you put even the slightest load in it? Or pulled a trailer with it? How many reporters and peaceful protestors could it handle before giving out? These are important questions.

 

[cactus]

Wasn't this the same day that Biden 'jokingly' said he was going to run over a reporter who asked about Israel? Jokingly. It was just a joke when the President joked about running people over and then drove away without answering a question. Vroom vroom!

Buckle up Buckaroo!