🐱 Not Your Fetish

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CatParty


Think about the last time you pored through a bookstore’s erotica section. Chances are you saw buff white men and skinny white women on the covers of books with titles like Hot and Steamy: Sexually Inducing Stories and Erotic Pleasures: 69 Tales for You and Your Man. These books often convey ridiculously normative notions: Men have cocks, women have pussies, straight sex is the only way to elicit pleasure, and trans people simply don’t exist. Transness is almost always missing—even in ostensibly queer and feminist adult anthologies. At most, trans characters appear in one or two stories, and then often only as a cisgender character’s partner. There’s a simple reason for this: Mainstream adult content centers the desires and gazes of the most privileged in society, which means that the lion’s share of erotica caters to cis, straight, and white readers.

As both a trans woman and a columnist for the Daily Dot, I think a lot about this erasure of the trans experience. My column, “Trans/Sex,” explores an array of topics, including the best sex toys for pre-op and non-op trans women and the best approaches to unpacking and affirming trans women’s sexual fetishes. Opening up about the impact of these and other issues is a raw, vulnerable process for me, but a column like mine is sorely needed in a world where so little of the available sexual literature is dedicated to helping trans people figure out masturbation, safe sex, and other elements of our love lives. Unfortunately, trans bodies are still stigmatized in bathrooms, locker rooms, and erotica. Erotica isn’t the only genre that overlooks or misrepresents trans people.

Coming-of-age stories like Kim Fu’s 2014 novel For Today I Am a Boy hyperfixate on trans people’s coming out while cyberpunk novels like Annalee Newitz’s 2017 Autonomous tackle gender in a capitalist dystopia but leave little room for transness. When books across genres are oversaturated by the cis gaze, trans people—particularly trans women—are shoved into a binary that paints us as either disgusting abnormalities or obscene fetishes, both of which reinforce a desirability politics in which the most conventionally attractive bodies are privileged while the least so are conversely told to fuck off. Of course, trans writers regularly challenge the cis gaze by writing about our sex lives and bodies. In 2011, Morty Diamond edited Trans/Love: Radical Sex, Love & Relationships Beyond the Gender Binary, an essay collection that featured prominent writers like Julia Serano and Cooper Lee Bombardier tackling trans sexuality in all of its messiness.

Trans/Love wasn’t edited with cis readers in mind; Lambda Literary’s TT Jax hailed the collection for digging into everything from fatphobia in the queer community to “the disappointment of finding your fantasy butch Daddy in a diaper.” For many readers, Trans/Love was the first time they picked up a book where trans people were talking about their own bodies, sexuality, and love lives. Trans/Love not only paved the way for trans people to write openly and bluntly about their sex lives; it also told trans people that their bodies are desirable. In 2017, queer porn creator and performer Tobi Hill-Meyer edited Nerve Endings: The New Trans Erotic, a powerful trans erotica anthology that delved into threesomes, dysphoria-inducing hookups, cisbian and lesbian dating, having sex to cope with the world, and making love to bond with other trans folks.

Good erotica, like Trans/Love and Nerve Endings, makes us all think deeply about who we desire and why we desire them.


Both Nerve Endings and Trans/Love continue the long history of trans writers sharing stories about their bodies through blogs, fanfiction, open mic readings in queer bars, and various other avenues. “I definitely don’t think Nerve Endingswas unprecedented,” says Jeanne Thornton, copublisher of Instar Books, the publisher that released Nerve Endings. “Trans people have produced erotica long before 2017 and will continue to do so long after; it is one of our magic powers.” If Trans/Love taught trans readers that their bodies are beautiful, then Nerve Endingsshowed a new audience how to write smut about trans people and their fantasies. Two years after publication, Nerve Endings is still Instar’s top-selling book, with orders coming in from well beyond “coastal cities and cultural capitals,” according to Thornton.

Even in areas with smaller queer and trans communities, people want to read erotic stories that center trans voices. Thornton says the collection’s success is also due to Hill-Meyer’s connections and skills as an adult creator. “Tobi [Hill-Meyer] found and cultivated stories that [discuss] trans erotic lives in ways that aren’t fundamentally fetishistic,” Thornton says. “There’s space for caring and disappointment and loneliness and all the extra shades and colors of erotic experience that may easily be left out.” Good erotica, like Trans/Love and Nerve Endings, makes us all think deeply about who we desire and why we desire them—and giving everyone the channels they need to explore their own desires and desirability.
 
Ana (I don’t even have to look I know it’s him), everyone already knows, based upon actual peer-reviewed research, that no one wants to fuck you. “Cis” don’t, males don’t, females don‘t. Gays, lesbians, straights, bis, nobody does. It was what, 3% overall who would be willing to even try it, and of those they were *all* only willing to have sex with a troon of the birth sex they were attracted to?

People want to *read* about fucking you less than they want to fuck you. There are definitely a few dudes who don’t want to read about you who would be willing to let you blow them if no one would find out. Reading is a solitary, personal thing, and is it not supposed to be labour.

Are you going to pay people to read about fucking you? Because in bookstores, see, the books are there for people to pay for because they want to read them. Therefore, the books for sale are ones they believe will find an audience. Who will pay.

You would have to PAY US, to get us to do something as undesirable as read erotica containing shit we do not find erotic and have no interest in. Are you paying?

Learn to live with the discomfort of being found undesirable by roughly 97% of the planet. Learn to live with the discomfort of not being able to control other people’s thoughts. And desires.
 
"Men have cocks? Ridiculous!"

I guess there were more words after that.
 
Mainstream adult content centers the desires and gazes of the most privileged in society, which means that the lion’s share of erotica caters to cis, straight, and white readers.
I’m fairly certain that, like most industries, it follows where the money is. Big surprise, straight smut sells better. I wonder if thats because theres a larger percentage of people who are straight?

One day I’ll learn to stop reading these kinds of articles.
 
It's like going to a gay bar and asking where all the women are at-- oh, wait... Bad example... It's like going to a gay torrent site and asking where all the straight porn is. Complaining that the vast majority aren't forced to sift through the interest of an overstated minority show, yet again, that the interest is more in imposing on people than being free to be oneself.

Also, I'm truly sick of hearing about random people's sexuality and sexual interest far more than I even think about my own. I mean, I may be gay but I'm still a huge prude.
 
It's like going to a gay bar and asking where all the women are at-- oh, wait... Bad example... It's like going to a gay torrent site and asking where all the straight porn is. Complaining that the vast majority aren't forced to sift through the interest of an overstated minority show, yet again, that the interest is more in imposing on people than being free to be oneself.

Also, I'm truly sick of hearing about random people's sexuality and sexual interest far more than I even think about my own. I mean, I may be gay but I'm still a huge prude.
I cannot tell you the degree to which I have lost interest in anyone’s bizarre sex lives and desires. Back in the late 90s which is when I became aware of such things, it was interesting. All freaks were. I had an anthropological interest because I have an anthropological interest in men. This is because when I was in high school I read this Ayn Rand quote: Show me what a man finds attractive, and I will tell you his entire philosophy of life. I am super interested in men and how they think so of course I wanted to aware myself of various perversions, and why they might manifest.

Now? There is nothing I haven’t heard of, and if there is, I know without further investigation that I do not want to hear of it.
 
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Trust me dude, no sane person sees you as their fetish, much less sees you as fuckable. The idea of you seeing yourself as spank material speaks to your narcissism. Even the most liberal of people I’ve talked with once pressed say that while they’ll respect your pronouns and all that shit, they’re still not comfortable getting into bed with aberrations like you. Rest easy, you’re no one’s idea of a fetish
 
At that point just post an article with just your axe wound on it.

It's more expedient AND more controversial than bitching about it.
 
The only genre that should feature these people is science-fiction. It's the only place where their fantasies can become true.

Also, what a nerve of this man to talk about fetishes when women are their own fetish, that's why they try to be us.
 
Has this person thought of writing their own steamy tranny porn instead of this article? Be the change you want to see... And fuck off. Who knows maybe then you'll get laid... Hope lives in life? lol
 
Has this person thought of writing their own steamy tranny porn instead of this article? Be the change you want to see... And fuck off. Who knows maybe then you'll get laid... Hope lives in life? lol
He does, according to the website bio of him:

Ana Valens is a reporter for the Daily Dot, where she pens the monthly column “Trans/Sex.” She has been published in Waypoint, Fanbyte, and The Toast. Alongside her work as a journalist, she also writes erotica for lesbian trans women.​

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Bell:

Sylvia and Ash are two trans women lovers living together on the Lower East Side. Between evenings in the Village and mornings at the local cafe, life is peaceful enough. But when another trans woman from Sylvia's past enters her life again, Sylvia and Ash's relationship is thrown into turmoil. Faced with her girlfriend's concern, Sylvia is left to deal with a world of fear, control, kink, and lust in New York City's trans community.​

It's very generic bullshit that could work as well if you don't make the characters trans but cis instead, so it's not even anything groundbreaking. The other book about Tumblr is non-fiction.

To be fair, this is just erotica written by a man with a fetish for men with that same specific fetish. And there is a reason why erotica isn't targeted for men. Valens, being a man, wants just pornography, he doesn't have the balls (npi) to admit it.
 
Trust me dude, no sane person sees you as their fetish, much less sees you as fuckable. The idea of you seeing yourself as spank material speaks to your narcissism. Even the most liberal of people I’ve talked with once pressed say that while they’ll respect your pronouns and all that shit, they’re still not comfortable getting into bed with aberrations like you. Rest easy, you’re no one’s idea of a fetish
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This isn't fuckable to you? What are you? A fucking virgin?
 
Sylvia and Ash are two trans women lovers living together on the Lower East Side. Between evenings in the Village and mornings at the local cafe, life is peaceful enough.
God... of course it would be about Lower East Side hipsters, too. No sane person wants to fuck hipsters. No sane person wants to fuck trannies. And literally no one wants to fuck Ana Valens.
 
He does, according to the website bio of him:

Ana Valens is a reporter for the Daily Dot, where she pens the monthly column “Trans/Sex.” She has been published in Waypoint, Fanbyte, and The Toast. Alongside her work as a journalist, she also writes erotica for lesbian trans women.​

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Bell:

Sylvia and Ash are two trans women lovers living together on the Lower East Side. Between evenings in the Village and mornings at the local cafe, life is peaceful enough. But when another trans woman from Sylvia's past enters her life again, Sylvia and Ash's relationship is thrown into turmoil. Faced with her girlfriend's concern, Sylvia is left to deal with a world of fear, control, kink, and lust in New York City's trans community.​

It's very generic bullshit that could work as well if you don't make the characters trans but cis instead, so it's not even anything groundbreaking. The other book about Tumblr is non-fiction.

To be fair, this is just erotica written by a man with a fetish for men with that same specific fetish. And there is a reason why erotica isn't targeted for men. Valens, being a man, wants just pornography, he doesn't have the balls (npi) to admit it.
Ask a stupid question... Thanks for that... We all need these lessons from time to time. Fuck all...
 
That person should be glad he/she/it isnt living in the times where transexuals were hanged and thrown off roof tops or at the very least sent to mental institutions.

Trans dont really appreciate how much their existance and comfort is thanks to the kindness of their enemies.
 
The problem, to the troon, is principally one of fulfillment. It fulfills the AGP need of the transgender to be sexually wanted, and to not be wanted kills the high of autogynephilia. People's individual tastes are to be trampled over, "suck the girldick, bigot", because that is what is sexually and chemically addictive and satisfying to the autogynephile.

It isn't about "visibility", it's about fulfilling the fetish. Most people with fetishes can live their lives without expressing them constantly, not so much for the autogynephile.

Autogynephilia.png
 
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