💼 Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[jspit2.0]

The second they abolish the filibuster, they cross a Rubicon that they'll never be able to uncross. It essentially removes any notion of checks on the governing party's power, and they will regret that when they lose.

Pah, by then he'll be on Mars with his Jetpack fool!

Watching Bob change his beliefs on Puerto Rico daily in order to copy what a certain boricua who he wants to shag says will never not be funny.

Bob's probably still recovering from the bad orange man winning the brown people. Imagine how badly Trump 2020 Texas and Florida shattered him. He probably couldn't eat a taco for a week. (Don't worry, Big Mac's stepped up to handle the load).

It looks like he's currently thirsting after some fake geek girl called Jenny Nichole.

 

[Ita Mori]

So I don't buy for a fucking second Robert went "oh my goooooddd!!!" over a character he had to look up at the wikipedia later on, or the second he saw that tentacle, yep! That is starro, just like his 1960 debut against the JLA! that's my boy!!! yeah, uh-hu, totally happened.

I'm not one of those asshole that act as if people need to pass a ridiculous pop culture trivia before enjoying shit, let people like what they like, but I can't stand posers like Robert acting as if they have this investment over this D lister DC villain when in reality we all know that acting as if he is super duper excited for Starro is just another way for him to flex the "I CLAPPED WHEN I SAW THE THING I KNOW" which on Robert's mind, makes him the professional pop-culture commentator and the rest being the rest.

It's the whole "Hulk buster suit" from the Age of Ultron trailer posing all over again.
Where no one except 1 nerd knew what it was and exclaimed, then 20 different posers repeated his words 1/2 a second later pretending they knew what they were talking about trying to impress a room full of posers like him.

Lindsay Ellis deleted her Twitter after crossing some Asians by insulting that Raya movie, Robert should reach out to her, give her a shoulder to cry on. They can talk about Starro. And Jarro, their favorite Starro offshoot.

It's ok baby, I insult Hispanics who believe in Jesus all the time!
Sex at my place or yours, colleague??

 

[Ralph Barnhardt]

Bobby saw his brother scratching his belly, and somehow he thinks about "primus":

In the event that someone doesn't understand the...reference?

There's no greater meaning or deeper lore or any cleverness whatsoever. Bob saw a big brown beaver and bleated out "PRIMUS" because this is the same big brained, referential intellect that jumped up and shouted "OH MY GOD" at a trailer. Also something something only 90's kids probably.

 

[Lasersuit Larry]

It's the whole "Hulk buster suit" from the Age of Ultron trailer posing all over again.
Where no one except 1 nerd knew what it was and exclaimed, then 20 different posers repeated his words 1/2 a second later pretending they knew what they were talking about trying to impress a room full of posers like him.


It's ok baby, I insult Hispanics who believe in Jesus all the time!
Sex at my place or yours, colleague??

Maybe it's just that I don't hang around circles that attract many Disney drones, but I know a few of people of a South East Asian persuasion who aren't impressed with Raya either. People are catching on to the fact that Disney's animated movie strategy seems to be 'make as many different ethnic variants of the same three highly similar stories as possible'.

It's cute when it's a fetish of your favorite foreign cuisine, but it's a mob when you realize that each of these movies is a flesh golem made of someone's childhood fairy tales, and now it's your turn.

 

[Giga_Nigga_28]

in which Bob confuses "public service" for literally "serving the public":
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"Food service workers are the backbone of our civilization," no Bob your reliance on fairly small servings of McDonalds is in no way representative of the importance of food service workers to the general population and definitely not civilization as a whole. If all food service workers were to disappear tomorrow people would just cook there own food now if all cops were to disappear well... we've all seen the state of Minneapolis haven't we?
It also such a bizarre statement and really exemplifies Bobs narcissistic worldview where things only have value with reference to him and his taste, so the wagie who serves him his food is somehow elevated to a pillar of civilization itself but those dirty, racist cops? Who fucking needs 'em?

 

[Alexander Thaut]

Why did they put a female Ratcatcher in the new SS movie?

If you want another female for diversity sake, why not go with a canonically female villain, instead of gender-swapping some random Z-lister?

fair, but it's Ratcatcher.

I don't think anyone's a die hard Ratcatcher fan.

Robert doesn't "know" who Starro is either. Normies and Robert know Starro from that one episode of Batman Beyond with the justice league, and that is it.

On the comics Starro might show up here and there, but he never had much else going for him, maybe in the legion of Superheroes, but who the fuck reads the fucking Legion?

So I don't buy for a fucking second Robert went "oh my goooooddd!!!" over a character he had to look up at the wikipedia later on, or the second he saw that tentacle, yep! That is starro, just like his 1960 debut against the JLA! that's my boy!!! yeah, uh-hu, totally happened.

I'm not one of those asshole that act as if people need to pass a ridiculous pop culture trivia before enjoying shit, let people like what they like, but I can't stand posers like Robert acting as if they have this investment over this D lister DC villain when in reality we all know that acting as if he is super duper excited for Starro is just another way for him to flex the "I CLAPPED WHEN I SAW THE THING I KNOW" which on Robert's mind, makes him the professional pop-culture commentator and the rest being the rest.

And this kind of attitude isn't exactly new, it is just taking a new shape on these internet age. But the core of the sentiment is "I know more than you", and if ever been in a comics convention in the 90's early 2000's, this was typical scene you would see everywhere:

https://youtube.com/watch?v=eTAGIkYsAdY
But really, acting out for fucking Starro? fuck off Robert.

Starro didn't die for this.

"Food service workers are the backbone of our civilization," no Bob your reliance on fairly small servings of McDonalds is in no way representative of the importance of food service workers to the general population and definitely not civilization as a whole. If all food service workers were to disappear tomorrow people would just cook there own food now if all cops were to disappear well... we've all seen the state of Minneapolis haven't we?
It also such a bizarre statement and really exemplifies Bobs narcissistic worldview where things only have value with reference to him and his taste, so the wagie who serves him his food is somehow elevated to a pillar of civilization itself but those dirty, racist cops? Who fucking needs 'em?

they gotta be paid to haul the wheelbarrows.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Bob's fixation on James Gunn is getting creepier than his thirst over hot dog girl. With Lindsay there was the excuse that Bob is an incel who wanted m'lady's affections but his thing with Gunn is reaching "wants to wear his skin" levels of creepy. The guy feels like he has a personal connection with Gunn and feels like he should have the success Gunn has too because of reasons I don't care enough to look up again.

Time for some Armchair Psychology.

I think, and I'm sure a lot of you would agree with me on this, Bob is aware of how pathetic his life is. He knows he's a fat loser who'll die without knowing the gentle touch of a woman. He knows his YouTube channel is collapsing, he knows his Patreon consists of pity bucks and people who've forgotten they're donating to him, and he knows his precious blue checkmark is all he has left. So, when he looks at James Gunn, he sees a man who is everything he isn't.

This, I think, is leading Bob to subconsciously try to live through James Gunn. Yes, I say subconsciously. Bob is too much of a consoomer and too much of a nobody to consciously try to live life through James Gunn. But given his fixation on Gunn, and on what Gunn has accomplished, Bob on some level equates Gunn's success with his own. So when James Gunn is fired, it's the worst thing ever, because that somehow means Bob has failed. When Gunn's movies succeed, that means Bob has succeeded (suck it, obsoletes!)

I'm certain Bob wants the success Gunn has. But given that it will never happen, Bob lives his (idealized) life through Gunn.

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

Time for some Armchair Psychology.

I think, and I'm sure a lot of you would agree with me on this, Bob is aware of how pathetic his life is. He knows he's a fat loser who'll die without knowing the gentle touch of a woman. He knows his YouTube channel is collapsing, he knows his Patreon consists of pity bucks and people who've forgotten they're donating to him, and he knows his precious blue checkmark is all he has left. So, when he looks at James Gunn, he sees a man who is everything he isn't.

This, I think, is leading Bob to subconsciously try to live through James Gunn. Yes, I say subconsciously. Bob is too much of a consoomer and too much of a nobody to consciously try to live life through James Gunn. But given his fixation on Gunn, and on what Gunn has accomplished, Bob on some level equates Gunn's success with his own. So when James Gunn is fired, it's the worst thing ever, because that somehow means Bob has failed. When Gunn's movies succeed, that means Bob has succeeded (suck it, obsoletes!)

I'm certain Bob wants the success Gunn has. But given that it will never happen, Bob lives his (idealized) life through Gunn.

That's similar to how I feel about Bob's opinion on Kevin Smith.

Like, Bob thought of Smith as though he were a sort of avatar of Bob's generation. So when Smith started slacking off and making crappy movies with little effort while becoming an even bigger pothead, Bob felt that it was somehow an indictment of his entire generation.

 

[The Valeyard]

That's similar to how I feel about Bob's opinion on Kevin Smith.

Like, Bob thought of Smith as though he were a sort of avatar of Bob's generation. So when Smith started slacking off and making crappy movies with little effort while becoming an even bigger pothead, Bob felt that it was somehow an indictment of his entire generation.

A generation that Bob isn't even part of as being born in 1981 makes him an early Millennial instead of Generation X like Smith.

 

[Mr Snek]

Pretty much this. The concept had legs back in the 80s because of the Cold War and you could have the SS poking around Syria or the USSR trying to uncover homeland security threats. Also, the original run typically had a revolving cast of different villains depending on who got locked up in other comics; I remember the Penguin was in a storyline after Batman put him away.

It used to be a vehicle for writers to take obscure characters from the 60s or 70s and play around with them. Now it seems that you're destined to get killed off unless you're Deadshot, Harley Quinn or Capt Boomerang.

I always wondered why they never made a Suicide Squad movie with a cheap Trump stand in as the evil corrupt president who the SS would somehow inevitably end up stopping. That's what I expected the first movie to be.

 

[The tired cat]

Especially since the actual Robert DuBois version of Bloodsport was a Vietnam draft dodger who became a LARPER when his brother got his limbs blown off pretending to be him. Bloodsport was given weapons by Lex Luthor along with a teleporter to give him access to the whole arsenal. But hey, why not just turn him into a bootleg Iron Man?

I could be wrong, but like Deadshot got changed a lot from motivations to character designs, wasn't it the same story with Bloodsport as well?

 

[The escape....?]

looks like Bob got the last laugh...

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

But it's already happened three times the past decade. The Dems did it when the GOP were blocking every of Obama's nominations and the GOP did it twice, to nominate both of Trump's Supreme court nominations.

The rubicon has been crossed and will continue to be crossed, seeing as how Washington has broke down into ineffectual political posturing/pandering and legislative cock blocking anytime one party doesn't have a trifecta.

That was over judicial confirmation, which though bad is slightly less bad than doing it to pass legislation.

Most of Breadtube are unapologetic tankies who think the USSR was totally cool, so you can imagine what Bob's rants about wanting to bulldoze the entire midwest and replace all the low-income homes with shopping malls make them feel.

Breadtube, the DSA, and that whole collective of middle-class white leftists with beards that would put a Russian Orthodox priest to shame, try to care about the working class, even if that ”trying” looks like Ralph Wiggum trying to help. As such, I don't think they're fans of Bob's ranting about how everyone earning under $30k a year should get the gas.

Imagine how badly Trump 2020 Texas and Florida shattered him. He probably couldn't eat a taco for a week.

That's implying he eats any form of spicy food.

At best he faults Marx for failing to envisage the so-called "intellectual" and "creative" industry:

To go back to what me, @Sexy Senior Citizen and @TowinKarz were saying on Thursday, albeit in a very joking way, Blob really doesn't realise how much his side hates him.

In the event of an actual revolution I doubt Blob would have much luck explaining to Commisar Cleetus Macdonald and Party Secretary Jamal Tyrese LeShawn that they both need to become neoliberals, or that he's their natural leader because he's a ”creative-class worker”, or that they need to stop tearing down Hollywood for being bourgeois and make him the Secretary for Revolutionary Capeshit.

 

[Malagor the dank omen]

I hate that nerd culture went mainstream. I love comic books and cartoons and anime, I grew up with it but ever since it became popular it’s attracted some of the nastiest people around. People like Bob who talk about morals, politics, what constitutes as good fiction and brag about how nerdy they are. And some of these freaks are downright homicidal. Did you guys know the Steven Universe fandom almost drove a girl to suicide a couple of years ago? It was all over some stupid fanart too.

Not only that. The SU fanbase bullied a girl into suicide because she drew a fat character not as fat. When news came of her on suicide watch, all of them were rooting for her killing herself. It reached a point where the creators of SU came to stop this crap and the fanbase turned on them and begun to attack them. It was a really interesting and terribly depressing shitshow that effectively marked the Steven Universe fanbase as the worst there is.

The fact that nerd culture is something that became "normalized" is something that made me jump boat a long time ago and i'm thankful for that. After all, some other nerdy stuff like Warhammer are trying to go mainstream by normalizing their content and making it more palatable to normies, which has already caused a lot of nerds to rise up in arms against GW. But everybody knows that GW doesn't listen to its fans.

We can say that nerd culture has suffered a "Bobification" process. Most, if not all, have drifted off from their initial purpose just to become products to sell and part people from their money. Just to make people CONSOOM as much as they can and give them new things to CONSOOM. Nothing has flair or charm, just another cheap piece of trash to wave around in the faces of manchildren so they watch agape and cry about how much they want it. Damn, what an age to be Bob Chipman.

If Bob understood Karl Marx's ideology he would despise the man, because his beloved Neoliberal is everything Marx hated and railed against. And his bullshit about culling the midwest "wasteland" would definitely not fly.

Marx and most communist/anarchist ideologues would despise to the core of their souls every single commie of this day and age. How many anarchists today live in communes where nothing works because they spend all their time arguing about what they should do next? Next to none, and same could be said of commies who just preach rather than lead by example, because they know they would regret that decision.

Also, how would Bob feel about knowing that Marx was against gays because he considered a vice of the burguoise that was used to divide the workers in their efforts against their enemies? I bet that would make Marx an even greater undesirable. Not only he was against CONSOOMING, he also didn't liked the gay.

Breadtube, the DSA, and that whole collective of middle-class white leftists with beards that would put a Russian Orthodox priest to shame, try to care about the working class, even if that ”trying” looks like Ralph Wiggum trying to help. As such, I don't think they're fans of Bob's ranting about how everyone earning under $30k a year should get the gas.

I don't think Bob's idea of "worthy of the superior future" is related to money. After all, most likely he will not yeet Wendy's employees no matter how poor they are. Like he said, it's "creativeness", but what the fuck does that mean with that? I keep drawing a blank on this because his descriptions are incredibly vage and he doesn't give any specific example. Is he referring to scientists? Engineers? Artists?

I wish someone pressed him on this issue, but we know that he will most likely say "You know what i mean and if you don't, you're an inferior subhuman that is definetly my enemy".

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

Also, how would Bob feel about knowing that Marx was against gays because he considered a vice of the burguoise that was used to divide the workers in their efforts against their enemies? I bet that would make Marx an even greater undesirable. Not only he was against CONSOOMING, he also didn't liked the gay.

Or his views on race:

The Jewish nigger Lassalle who, I’m glad to say, is leaving at the end of this week, has happily lost another 5,000 talers in an ill-judged speculation... he bases himself on the view that he ought to live the life of a Jewish baron, or Jew created a baron (no doubt by the countess). Just imagine! It is now quite plain to me — as the shape of his head and the way his hair grows also testify — that he is descended from the negroes who accompanied Moses’ flight from Egypt (unless his mother or paternal grandmother interbred with a nigger). Now, this blend of Jewishness and Germanness, on the one hand, and basic negroid stock, on the other, must inevitably give rise to a peculiar product. The fellow’s importunity is also nigger-like.

Like he said, it's "creativeness", but what the fuck does that mean with that?

He means ”voting (D) at every election.”

 

[Smithfield Ham]

I have a memory of Bob speaking derisively about Marx before.

He probably doesn't do it often because it hurts his feelings so much when Twitter lefties tell him to go fuck himself.

I remember him saying he wanted someone to make a Hamilton style rap musical about the life of Karl Marx. Whether he said this knowing it would be a fucking disaster or sincerely promoting the idea I can't remember, but I know it would be the real life version of "Springtime for Hitler."

 

[Tronathon242]

Ok, chicks and dicks of KF: I attended a screening of Godzilla vs Kong.

I can safely say that Bob will absolutely cream himself in his review of it. It has great monster action that is actually mostly focused on the creatures. On the other hand, it has some of the biggest piles of cinematic bullshit I have ever seen, especially the science and hollow earth stuff.

Spoiler: Long spoiler section ahead

So, it turns out that Kong has been contained by Monarch and some giant corporation that sprang and gained power from nowhere wants to use him to reach the hollow earth. Godzilla is attacking its facilities because it is hiding a secret project that requires hollow earth energy. Godzilla fights Kong at sea and nearly wins but for a depth charge attack. He comes back to finish the job but stops because the ships turn off their power in a submissive display even though he was willing to drown the big gorilla a minute ago.

They go into the hollow earth on craft with special and powerful gravity correcting engines. All the while, the girl from KotM and some new characters sleuthing around evil corporation's facilities are trapped on a cargo container that goes on a super speed underground rail to Hong Kong. They arrive at the HK facility and discover evil corp has made Mecha Godzilla (big shock). Its AI is powered by one of Ghidorah's skulls with a pilot sitting in it and controlling MG with a helmet. Godzilla hones in whenever it is activated and heads to HK after evil CEO watches it fight a skull crawler.

The hollow earth is reached through some bizarre dimensional jump scenario or something and the place has different sets of gravity in certain spots all the while there is ground in the sky or some shit. Kong finds the energy source and evil CEO's daughter (who looks lkke AOC, so probably more spank bank material for Bobby) gathers a sample after Kong activates it by sticking an axe made with a Godzilla spike on a pressure plate. She uploads it to evil corp's computer through a spider robot to fully power MG. Godzilla senses Kong's actions and uses his atomic breath to blast a hole in the ground all the way to the hollow earth to try and stop it. Kong uses it to fall/climb back up (the gravity shit is terribly inconsistent) to HK after crushing evil CEO's daughter (Press F). The good humans follow back on another craft.

Godzilla beats Kong and nearly kills him in their second fight. MG is activated and goes rogue (shock of all shocks). It beats the shit out of Godzilla and Kong is revived by exploding the last hollow earth craft as a defibrillator. The two team up to tackle MG but it's too strong. So, one of KotM girl's friends tries to hack into evil corp's computer to shut it down. He fails and there is a security lock. To get around it, he pours whiskey that the other guy they are with has through a grate in the console to short circuit it like a la McCready with the chess computer in The Thing (I shit you not.) This depletes MG's power source and Kong hacks it apart with his axe, everyone goes their separate ways and Kong goes to live as king of the hollow earth.

It has much, much better shot monster action and nice callbacks and references to not only the first version way back when but also other movies. Nearly everything to do with the humans, however, is so mind numbingly stupid or contrived. Like KotM with Atlantis, it also just mostly skips over the most interesting concept it introduces: the war between Kong's kind and Godzilla's species.

Bob will strut like a peacock proclaiming how smart some of the science is, I am sure of it, but it only exists to look good and doesn't make much sense. I will even say that some of the scenes in here are even dumber than those found in the Showa Era. It is the ultimate turn off your brain popcorn flick.

 

[Oliver Onions]

What for? His physical appearance is more than effective enough to keep him from procreating.

Bold of you to assume the target of his affections would be consenting.

looks like Bob got the last laugh...
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"Did you learn your lesson? HMMMMMMM?"

 

[Mr Snek]

Ok, chicks and dicks of KF: I attended a screening of Godzilla vs Kong.

I can safely say that Bob will absolutely cream himself in his review of it. It has great monster action that is actually mostly focused on the creatures. On the other hand, it has some of the biggest piles of cinematic bullshit I have ever seen, especially the science and hollow earth stuff.

You know, I'm surprised no one has started up a troll campaign of claiming that the monsterverse supports nazis by talking about the hollow earth theory. What I wouldn't give to see Bobs mental gymnastics if that happened.

 

[The tired cat]

The fact that nerd culture is something that became "normalized" is something that made me jump boat a long time ago and i'm thankful for that. After all, some other nerdy stuff like Warhammer are trying to go mainstream by normalizing their content and making it more palatable to normies, which has already caused a lot of nerds to rise up in arms against GW. But everybody knows that GW doesn't listen to its fans.

Let's be honest, WH even when it's fun has always had trouble with it's nerdom/fans. You either get people who just wanna paint models and play some games with others or you have those who treat this shit uber seriously, and frankly WH is like the last franchise you'd wanna treat seriously because of how dumb its lore tends to get.