🐮 Lolcow Russell Greer / Mr. Green / Russell Greee / Russle / Brothel Prince / @ just_some_dude_named_russell29 / A Safer Nevada PAC - Swift-Obsessed Sex Pest, Convicted of E-Stalking, "Eggshell Skull Plaintiff" Pro Se Litigant, Homeless, aspiring brothel owner

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Rasputin's Side Piece said:
Okay, I know this is late, but I've been catching up on the thread today and I wanted to share an observation.

Regarding the two lovely cheerleaders who posted with pictures of their escorts, prompting Russhole to leave a couple of disparaging comments: It's like, what the fuck, anyway? Nobody's talking to you, Stupid. But you see a nice couple minding their own business, and you have to intrude. Perhaps the guy (or girl) sees the comment and, not understanding who this jagoff is, is a little hurt by said comment. It's just a mean thing to do. It's as though every time this bastard sees a punchbowl filled with delicious punch, he has to shit in it and ruin it for everyone.

He cannot stand to leave people alone. He has to ruin everything.
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He has no problem leaving couples alone if she's a fatty mcpatty or otherwise less than a 9 - in every other case, the woman is his property by law and you should keep your dirty hands off of her
 
Poop Chute said:
Work on his magnum opus, of course.
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It's a considerable shame that Greer's epic works tend to manifest in prose and movie script form, especially now that blockbuster cinema is on life support, and no studio will greenlight any project conceived by the slobbering Spielberg of Salt Lake City.

I would very much like Russell to write an autobiographical musical in the abstract style of The Who's Tommy. I think, instead, what we will get is an album's worth of songs, all with girl's names as titles, with a disturbing cover-version of Every Breath You Take, originally by The Police, tacked onto the end.
 
Rasputin's Side Piece said:
Okay, I know this is late, but I've been catching up on the thread today and I wanted to share an observation.

Regarding the two lovely cheerleaders who posted with pictures of their escorts, prompting Russhole to leave a couple of disparaging comments: It's like, what the fuck, anyway? Nobody's talking to you, Stupid. But you see a nice couple minding their own business, and you have to intrude. Perhaps the guy (or girl) sees the comment and, not understanding who this jagoff is, is a little hurt by said comment. It's just a mean thing to do. It's as though every time this bastard sees a punchbowl filled with delicious punch, he has to shit in it and ruin it for everyone.

He cannot stand to leave people alone. He has to ruin everything.
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You have to understand that in Ratmouth's world, he's the only guy that treats women well, he's a total stud and he's literally a 10 on every single scale. So he's just informing them how he's there for the woman when her obviously trash boyfriend acts like a total jerk around her, sleeps around with other women and generally turns into the douchebag he really is underneath it all. As we've established, Russ is the only true stud around so no other guy can be.

When in reality he's a little goblin of a man who even if he didn't have that facial paralysis he'd still be little goblin of a man that women wouldn't want to be with. The only difference then is that he's be able to close his mouth.
 
PolexiaAphrodisia said:
I mean, he does like pretty women. Cheerleaders and models are conventionally attractive women, and I'm sure Taylor Swift and Katy Perry would certainly be considered sexually appealing by most men, and dating (or fucking) one of those kinds of women is probably a pretty common fantasy.

Russell's one single solitary redeeming quality is that he works and doesn't sit around on disability welfare all day.

He isn't picky about the kinds of jobs he takes either. He will prefer to take a job he can spin into something cool, like "I work at a law firm [scrubbing toilets]," but he'll take grunt work at Wally World if he has to.

Ironically I would actually prefer him to sit around on disability welfare, because he is actually disabled and it would keep him away from situations where he could harass female coworkers and customers. However I also think that work is one thing that keeps him from going 100% cuckoo bananas, since it forces him out of the house and into some normalcy.
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I think Russ is forced to work, does his deformity even qualify as a disability making him unable to do any form of manual or physical labor? Except driving a UPS van (supposedly, he has bragged about owning a car like a big boy at least twice now) I mean.

I'm not an avid scholar of the American welfare system so I don't know, just thinking if I were American I wouldn't want my tax money so Russ can hire toothy whores on my dime.

Also I disagree, watching Russ scramble from job-to-job, wearing down his options, leaving 1 star reviews in an epic revenge crusade is much more entertaining than just giving him money because he has a gimp face.
 
Angry New Ager said:
On this point, I disagree. Instead of harassing co-workers and customers, he'd end up harassing women in various low-level service jobs--baristas, restaurant workers, supermarket checkers. They have to wait on him, they have to be nice, and unless they're lucky enough to have a manager who listens to their complaints about creepy/abusive customers, and is willing to give Russell the boot, they're stuck dealing with him. Co-workers and customers, on the other hand, can complain about his harassment and get results.
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He already does this, and when he doesn't get results he leaves their place of work one-star reviews.
Rustled Jimmies said:
I think Russ is forced to work, does his deformity even qualify as a disability making him unable to do any form of manual or physical labor? Except driving a UPS van (supposedly, he has bragged about owning a car like a big boy at least twice now) I mean.
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If you can get disability for being fucking fat or "anxious" or autistic, you can get it for having a facial paralysis that leaves you completely unsuited for any kind of communications work or customer service.
 
Russ's repeatedly-demonstrated ability to find paying janitorial work would absolutely bar him from receiving disability unless he could claim that he suddenly acquired some sort of new problem that made that impossible. His inability to keep his janitorial jobs is due to his own voluntary behavior, after all. Actually, to knowledgeable outside observers, like Kiwis, it's obvious that Russ has serious psychological problems rooted in profound narcissism and probably autism that cause him to repeatedly act in ways that get him fired, but the fact that he will never, ever admit to them means that he is unable to use them in a disability application. I wouldn't be surprised if he tries to claim that his PTSD worsened due to Muh Cyberstalking or something but that would invite a skeptical psychological exam that would debunk his PTSD claims and award him nothing.
 
Phil Ken Sebben said:
You have to understand that in Ratmouth's world, he's the only guy that treats women well, he's a total stud and he's literally a 10 on every single scale. So he's just informing them how he's there for the woman when her obviously trash boyfriend acts like a total jerk around her, sleeps around with other women and generally turns into the douchebag he really is underneath it all. As we've established, Russ is the only true stud around so no other guy can be.

When in reality he's a little goblin of a man who even if he didn't have that facial paralysis he'd still be little goblin of a man that women wouldn't want to be with. The only difference then is that he's be able to close his mouth.
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Now I wish those hilariously crazy Italians would come on back and make a sequel to Troll 2.

It Came From Nilbog: Russell Greer Origin
Oh no! He's Drooling on them. And then he's gonna drool on me. OH MY GAAAHHHHHHD!!!!!
 
Constellationzero said:
Now I wish those hilariously crazy Italians would come on back and make a sequel to Troll 2.

It Came From Nilbog: Russell Greer Origin
Oh no! He's Drooling on them. And then he's gonna drool on me. OH MY GAAAHHHHHHD!!!!!
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And instead of turning them into plant mush the people eat one of his Malt-O -Meal and then turn into Costco muffins.
 
DrainRedRain said:
The only thing that stops him for acting violent (for now) is his numerous physical issues. Dude can't run, can't jump, can't even move his fucking eyes around to have a peripheral vision. His fingers are short, stubby and webbed, and he has knock knees. He has zero shoulder definition and core strength, no muscle mass to speak of, and I suspect he might also suffer from some form of club feet.

But he is spiteful and malicious enough to concoct something and hurt someone for real, be it with a gun (if he ever learns how to use one properly) or paying someone to do the dirt job. We all know he loves to pay strangers to do things for him, anyway.
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If he gets a gun, hopefully he picks this one:

gun.jpg
 
Phil Ken Sebben said:
You have to understand that in Ratmouth's world, he's the only guy that treats women well, he's a total stud and he's literally a 10 on every single scale. So he's just informing them how he's there for the woman when her obviously trash boyfriend acts like a total jerk around her, sleeps around with other women and generally turns into the douchebag he really is underneath it all. As we've established, Russ is the only true stud around so no other guy can be.
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I thought about how he got into his head that he's the only nice around around, and I think it's because of his ritualistic view of courtship. He says nice things, brings flowers and other junk, and wears a suit, just like in 90s romcoms. He thinks this is what nice guys do, and he doesn't see other guys doing this (because that's not how dating works now) so therefore, he's the only nice guy around. Of course, in reality, he's a grade-A asshole as soon as he gets rejected, and he is far from the only guy who is nice to women. Many guys are nice to woman ever after getting rejected. Those are the real nice guys because they respect women's choices. Russ is nice as a ploy, not because it's the right thing to do. Russ doesn't do anything without an ulterior motive.
 
DrJonesHat said:
Those are the real nice guys because they respect women's choices.
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Most women have been approached by someone they weren't interested in or approached when they weren't looking or were already in a relationship, I'd say.

Men who are solidly okay human beings take the rejection on the chin and move on, it's a part of life. If they're told, plainly, to fuck off, they'll fuck off.

Guys like Russell who think they're God's gift to women and don't understand why it's happening? Well, Russell's an extreme case, but we saw what happened with Erika.
 
Rewire Tea said:
Guys like Russell who think they're God's gift to women and don't understand why it's happening? Well, Russell's an extreme case, but we saw what happened with Erika.
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Yeah with Russ, no doesn't mean no. It means she doesn't understand what he's trying to do, and if you just let him explain, she'll be all over him. Of course, in the real world where most of us dwell, no does in fact mean no, and if a woman says she's not interested, you leave her alone and move on.
 
DrJonesHat said:
Yeah with Russ, no doesn't mean no. It means she doesn't understand what he's trying to do, and if you just let him explain, she'll be all over him. Of course, in the real world where most of us dwell, no does in fact mean no, and if a woman says she's not interested, you leave her alone and move on.
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No, you must understand, he's the man of every woman's dreams! He can swoop women away from their multi-billion homes to his studio apartment... All the choco-muffins and Wal-Mart brand Lucky Charms she would want! All she needs to do is cut off all ties from friends and family, and her life would be full. He did, after all, kick the shit out of disabilities while using that disability as a crutch. So cool.
 
AbraCadaver said:
If the man of my dreams was Russ Greer, I’d never fucking sleep again.
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If anyone had Russell Greer as the man of their dreams I would tell them it's time to stop experimenting with the hardcore psychedelics and go see a mental health professional ASAP.
 
Russell Greer is less the man of anyone’s dreams and more the sleep paralysis demon crouching on their chest as they lay immobile and gripped with sweaty terror.
 
I'm pretty sure those domestic violence/stalker movies you can rent off of direct TV are based entirely on Russ, but they have handsome men play the villain so they can't be sued by him.
 
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