Mario Galaxy kinda fucking sucks - Surprisingly not impressed.

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Chin of Campbell

Chin of Campbell

The Man with the Seething Brain
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Apr 11, 2019
I haven't played Galaxy since it came out and enjoyed it well enough. I completed fully both 64 and Sunshine, thus I figured it was time to do the Wii entry that's much lauded. And has that weird group of fans that insist there be a third Galaxy game? I think this group and the ones whining about Sonic Adventure 3 might be one in the same.

Like 20 stars in and I'm just fucking bored. The galaxies feel tiny and lifeless compared to the worlds of 64 and Sunshine, despite 64's early N64 creepy void vibe. The movement is fine, really precise, but it's basically just Odyssey but worse since it doesn't have unique momentum unlike 64 or Sunshine.

Now the obvious response here is that Galaxy is like 3D Land and 3D World in that it's basically just a 2D Mario in 3D, but it almost feels like Galaxy carries all of the baggage of 3D Mario without any of the good traits. 3D Land and World are slick and fast and have lots of pop and the music just gets you pumped up. Galaxy has a weird artstyle (Wii games in general kinda look like shit save a few) and there's clunky cutscenes every three seconds to show you what a button did or to show a star appearing or something. But since you're just traveling in a straight line instead od wandering around looking for shit, all of these flaws seem super condensed.

There's of course "the story" that people (redditors) will endlessly go on about, which amounts to "Rosalina mom die now she's god" or something. Of course, by accompanying this hackneyed "parents dying is sad" story with soft piano they've created a thick smokescreen of "the feels", thus rendering it immune to criticism. People will then tell you that Mario Galaxy has a good story despite it being NSMB tier "stop bowser because peach" with absolutely no flavoring at all.

So yeah, I'm kind of confused as to why this game is endlessly praised. I even used to do it, which is doubly confusing. Anyone else know what I mean here? Am I just a huge faggot? I mean, yeah, okay, I'm a huge faggot but am I a REALLY huge faggot?
 
I agree with you. Never could got into glaxy beacuse the wii controls were ass. Sunshine is still my favorite 3D mario. Just dont 100% it.
 
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The main difference with Mario Galaxy is the trippiness of traversing the spheres, and figuring out how to travel between them. Frankly, from a gameplay perspective, I think it's brilliant.

I heartily agree that the story with Rosalina is absurd and completely out of place in a Mario game. My initial response to it was laughter, and later annoyance when I found out a sizable number of fans were legitimately moved by that cheap piece of theater.
 
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I really enjoyed Galaxy, got almost all the stars (That one where you play as Luigi and have to grab coins on the platforms that look like SMB Luigi? That can fuck right off).

If you like other mario games better that's okay too. I really enjoyed the trippy gravity puzzles and stuff.
 
JektheDumbass said:
I really enjoyed Galaxy, got almost all the stars (That one where you play as Luigi and have to grab coins on the platforms that look like SMB Luigi? That can fuck right off).

If you like other mario games better that's okay too. I really enjoyed the trippy gravity puzzles and stuff.
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Yeah, I should make it clear that when I say "fucking sucks" it's in relation to other italian plumber bing bing yahoo games. Galaxy is (apparently) not my thing but it's a far cry from actually being a bad game.

On another note, while I like the inclusion of Luigi, the unlock of the super mega challenge level being behind playing the game all the way through again 100% is a bit much.
 
Personally I really disliked Galaxy/G2 due to how disconnected it felt. The planetoids were cool but I feel the game would've flowed a lot better if it was structured like Super Mario World instead of trying to be half linear mario and half exploration mario.

I wish we could go back to a big branching contiguous overworld map with secret exits. It'd make planetoids with multiple objectives feel a lot more special.
 
I liked Galaxy 1 and 2. The mechanics were a little weird, but once I got used to it, I found myself really digging the first game, and the 2nd game just followed suit from there.

Sunshine was the one I was kind of "meh" on. The island resort setting just never clicked with me (thought the haunted hotel and koopa amusement park were fun).
 
Haven't played it in over 10 years, but I do remember it being really, really long.
 
I'm trying to remember a Super Mario game that blew me away like World did. Launch titles don't get fucking better than that.
 
A podcast I started listening to, Left Behind Game Club, tended to feel the same way. It did resonate with me, because I remember playing it from over 10 years ago and being disappointed with it.

I'm not sure why it sucks though. I guess part of it was the unevenness of the levels, there was a lot of jumping around from tiny planetoids, some worlds were kind of like Mario 64 but much smaller, some worlds were bullshit platforming, and there was a lot of waggling stuff too.
 
Xarpho said:
A podcast I started listening to, Left Behind Game Club, tended to feel the same way. It did resonate with me, because I remember playing it from over 10 years ago and being disappointed with it.

I'm not sure why it sucks though. I guess part of it was the unevenness of the levels, there was a lot of jumping around from tiny planetoids, some worlds were kind of like Mario 64 but much smaller, some worlds were bullshit platforming, and there was a lot of waggling stuff too.
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Movement isn't fun to do like 64 or Sunshine. Those game you can dick around jumping and moving about and have fun, but Galaxy felt like it was trying to railroad you, and iirc the platforming wasn't a big deal and there wasn't nearly as much exploration as the other two.
and no parallel universes
 
I still haven't played it. It always looked like the worst parts of Sunshine to me (those stages that took away the water pump) so I skipped it.

I could be completely wrong, but that's how I felt at the time.
 
My only real complaint is with the constant blue star stuff, especially when you have to use them to maneuver or race.

Maybe it’s because I tend to play in handheld mode, so the constant switching of my hands makes it worse, but I really struggle with them sometimes.

The worlds themselves I find really clever and creative but the challenges are definitely simpler. I still think Odyssey is the best 3d Mario.
 
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