”I have a tendency to report the more sensational things that The Kiwi Farms is up to, the more shocking things, things like how it wants to construct gas chambers, incinerators, gulags, and concentration camps.”
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser .
Want to keep track of this thread?
Accounts can bookmark posts, watch threads for updates, and jump back to where you stopped reading.
Create account
Forum guidelines
Be civil. Don't get angry over Chris. If you need to tell people you're better than someone, you're probably not.
Limit discussion of body parts and functions. Chris is gross. Discussing his incontinence in detail is unnecessary and disturbing.
Don't roleplay in your posts. Don't write pretend dialog between people, such as Chris and his mother. Avoid writing monologues, they're also dumb.
Hide your powerlevel. Avoid revealing intimate, personal details about yourself in public boards. These threads are not your personal blog and we are not an asylum.
No trolling plans. We are not an autistic Illuminati. If you embarrass yourself or the forum trying to troll, we will ridicule you.
Write descriptive topic titles. "[14-Sep-2015] Facebook post about Sonichu" is better than "new update".
Chris doesn't read your posts. Stop trying to directly, or indirectly, chastise Chris through your posts. He does not care about what you have to say, and these rants are boring.
Don't post random articles. Unless the subject matter is directly related to Chris and his history, please do not post articles with a loose affiliation.
Talk to Staff
I want blood!
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris was an astronaut?
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris was an astronaut?
Dirty, crapped spacesuit.
If Chris could go back in time, would he try to become a woman?
Like totally bitchin'!
kiwifarms.net
This has probably been asked before, but what if Chris was a furry?
Chris is a furry...sort of...in his own weird idiosyncratic autistic way. He's obviously obsessed with anthropomorphic hedgehogs and makes all kinds of NSFW drawings of them. I'm not sure if its because he's a traditional "furry" or if he just likes Sonic a shit load and also likes to draw porn and just combines the two in a weird autistic way.
Spoiler: Would a non-furry draw this?
Last edited: May 29, 2015
Sandrat Fictionkin
kiwifarms.net
If Chris could go back in time, would he try to become a woman?
He'd try, but he'd accidentally go back too far and end up meeting Alexander Graham Bell on the day he invented the telephone. Chris being Chris, he'd end up destroying the invention through some profound act of stupidity. And then none of us would call anybody.
GS 281
Guest
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris brought the pepper spray to Impulse and he mistakes a small lover's quarrel between two nutcases for assault?
Blow your speakers with rock 'n roll
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris fucked fatties?
TIME TO SHANK SOME NERDS!!
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris brought the pepper spray to Impulse and he mistakes a small lover's quarrel between two for assault?
Think his current situation but with a bigger potential lawsuit against Chris, and a settlement from the store as they were just customers and not employees of the company where the event took place.
What if Chris grew up in a log cabin?
Sandrat Fictionkin
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris fucked fatties?
Does his mass debating count?
TIME TO SHANK SOME NERDS!!
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris fucked fatties?
The next featured thread will be titled "Seacow on lolcow action: read below"
GS 281
Guest
kiwifarms.net
He would try to act like he was a part of the crowd and get tranny trampled.
What if Chris went to a ping pong show?
Sandrat Fictionkin
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris was crushed under a pile of Barbage and came back as a ghost?
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris was crushed under a pile of Barbage and came back as a ghost?
The ghosts of Christopher, Bob, and Patty would have a new companion.
Misandric Storm Clouds are Gathering
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Earth was being invaded by aliens and Chris was humanity's last hope.
...Then all hope is lost. Might as well start looting, doing drugs, and having a gigantic fuck fest while you still can.
I want blood!
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris wasn't worthy?
Trve and Honest
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris's birthday was every single day?
Any road will take you there.
Retired Staff
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris was crushed under a pile of Barbage and came back as a ghost?
He'd sheet himself and do nothing.
GS 281
Guest
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris became one of the tranny hookers that hang out at Woodward and McNichols in Detroit?
Trailer Park Supervisor
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris owned a submarine?
What if Chris put his flag on a
Psi-moon ?
What if Chris crash-landed on a
planet with primitive single-cell lifeforms , then used tools to terraform the planet, and then created clones of himself (male and female) to populate the planet, and let the society develop for 600 years?
Last edited: May 29, 2015
The Sword of Atismu
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris bought a fat scooter and started riding around on that instead of walking?