Share Your School Stories - Weirdos, freaks, and idiots (self-inclusion optional)

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One time the black kid i was tutoring walked into class 45 minutes late, punched me in the face, and shouted "I'M THIZZIN!!!" and just left.
The next day he was totally normal and i helped him with trig.
 
I once accidentally wore a shirt that was the color of our big sports rival on the first day of spirit week.
First part of the day I was confused when people gave me shit for it and apologizing left and right.
After I got sick of hearing about it though, I started telling people I did it on purpose because our school sucks.

I made it a point to wear that color shirt every day for the rest of the week.
 
one time after gym class i went into my locker room and found that someone had taken my shirt and wiped their asshole with it. it was a concert shirt so i was pretty sad, but i threw it out and wore my wrinkly gym shirt for the rest of the day. not sure who did it.
 
This is the craziest thing that happened me during my senior year.

So, I'm in the locker room. I'm alone in there. All of a sudden, this Asian guy walks in. He has no shirt on, just this BDSM harness, a spiky collar and tight leather pants. The second he enters, he gives me this stink eye, like he's better than me, like I have no business being there. Total asshole, right? I'm feeling a bit intimidated, so I crack a joke at his expense.

I'm like, "Hey, buddy, I think you have the wrong gym. The leather club is down the street."

I smirk because I think I totally owned this guy, but he just stared at me, totally unfazed, and with the blankest affect possible says,

"Fuck you."

I get a little pissed, so I step up to him and we start going at it (light shoving and shit-talking). We talk about settling this bullshit, and before I know it, we're fucking each other in the ass and other gay shit. We were both 18+ because we had IEPs and neither of us graduated on time.
 
This is the craziest thing that happened me during my senior year.

So, I'm in the locker room. I'm alone in there. All of a sudden, this Asian guy walks in. He has no shirt on, just this BDSM harness, a spiky collar and tight leather pants. The second he enters, he gives me this stink eye, like he's better than me, like I have no business being there. Total asshole, right? I'm feeling a bit intimidated, so I crack a joke at his expense.

I'm like, "Hey, buddy, I think you have the wrong gym. The leather club is down the street."

I smirk because I think I totally owned this guy, but he just stared at me, totally unfazed, and with the blankest affect possible says,

"Fuck you."

I get a little pissed, so I step up to him and we start going at it (light shoving and shit-talking). We talk about settling this bullshit, and before I know it, we're fucking each other in the ass and other gay shit. We were both 18+ because we had IEPs and neither of us graduated on time.

Van and Billy?
 
In 8th grade our whole class went to Gettysburg over the weekend for a class trip. Saw a statue of a Union general that died in battle that looked just like one of our classmates, it turns out it was his great-great-something grandfather.

Not really that weird, since they're related and all. He never mentioned that he was a descendent of someone who fought in the Civil War. Most of us were 2nd or 3rd Gen Americans (mostly Italian). But the resemblance was uncanny.
 
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