🍗 Deathfat Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

[ADHD]

I can see her loading Bowie on a Quantas flight, waiting two hours, then calling Nick and telling him Bowie is on his way, and he's Nick's problem now.
Sadly, I've known a couple of people that did just that. One sent her kids to Missouri because she didn't want to be a mom any longer, and that's where dad lived, another sent her kids to Tennessee because her new boyfriend didn't like kids, and he was more important to her than her kids were.

If she did decide to ship him off to Nick, that would essentially mean Nick's parents would get stuck with him, right? Do we know anything about his parents? Might that actually be the best option for Bowie?

 

[George Floyd Sneed]

If she did decide to ship him off to Nick, that would essentially mean Nick's parents would get stuck with him, right? Do we know anything about his parents? Might that actually be the best option for Bowie?

It’ll never happen. A one way ticket from LAX to Sydney is about $800. That’s a lot of champagne cakes.

 

[DefCon Dumb]

Would any decent airline allow an unaccompanied minor that young, never mind on such a long trip?

 

[Cheesegirl78]

Would any decent airline allow an unaccompanied minor that young, never mind on such a long trip?

I've heard of airlines doing that, the child is tagged as an unaccompanied minor, and the flight attendants keep an eye on them.
Or they used to, I don't know if they still do that for the younger ones.

I was thinking more along the lines of her shipping Bowie off when (if) he hits his obnoxious teenage phase.

 

[BIG DADDY]

For someone so in love with her body she sure does choose the high waisted styles all the time

 

[Water-T]

For someone so in love with her body she sure does choose the high waisted styles all the time

No material on Earth could actually reach around her gunt and not burst at the seams the minute she sits down.

 

[Cheesegirl78]

No material on Earth could actually reach around her gunt and not burst at the seams the minute she sits down.

Who is making the Spandex for those shorts? Goodyear?

 

[Angry New Ager]

"Wouldn't trade being a mom," lol. She already did that the moment she kicked Rylee out of her life.

Actually, she did that not too long after Rylee was born, dumping him on her disabled mother so she could run off to Seattle to be an alt/pinup moddle.

Also, Bowie is the spitting image of Nick. How long until that along with his emerging bad attitude from her poor parenting triggers her to ship him off to someone in her family or Nick's? I can truly see her getting rid of him around 12/13 just like she did with Rylee, maybe even earlier so she can have her forties to herself. Little kids are cute; mouthy tweens are not.

She can't afford to ship him off to Nick, and Nick is never going to scrape the money together to fly him to Australia, so his parents would have to pay for it, and take care of Bowie (because Nick's just not going to do that). But, since Nick has been the source of a major narcissistic injury for Tess, she may refuse to ever send him to Australia at all. I don't think Nick or his family are going to see Bowie again for years. And Tess clearly despises her remaining family enough to not send him back to Mississippi unless she (or the state) has absolutely no other choice. Being a Narc, the last thing she'd want is her kids hearing stories from her brother about how terrible she really is, and always has been (Narcs like to keep people in their lives compartmentalized, so they can't get together and compare notes). Also, she might be keeping the boys away from her mom and other family as a way of punishing them--her mother went back to Mississippi rather than stay in LA and raise Bowie for her (while, no doubt, being constantly scolded by Tess for being an embarrassing hick from the South). And now that Tess is trying hard to play elite-level Woke in Public, no way would she let her kids be around her "backwards" relatives.

So if we're starting a betting pool, my money is on Tess finding a gay couple who think they want to be dads, but haven't been able to adopt, and parking Bowie with them. Among all the gays she's dealt with as hairdressers and makeup artists, there's got to be somebody who knows somebody who is willing to take a loaner kid. She'll probably use the same excuse as she has with Rylee, claiming that she wanted him to stay in the same school he'd already been attending. Which may be true, but that she's effectively homeless and can't afford to house him appropriately, and that he was already putting up resistance to her exploitation of him, aren't reasons that get you on the cover of Parents magazine.

That stripe on those shorts is so unflattering. If i were her, I would not have posted those.

She doesn't have much choice; she desperately needs that Flabletics sponsorship money, for as long as it lasts, so she'll wear whatever ugly shit they send her and do her best to pretend it's amazing. Flabletics really needs to start sending her clothes in her actual size, however (assuming they make those pants in a 5X), because it's so obvious that everything (especially the bottoms) is much too small on her. Those sweatpants? Sweats are supposed to be loose-fitting, and she's got those stretched so far out, it didn't even occur to her to tie the drawstring at the waist. Nice going, Tess.

ETA: I just checked, and Flabletics only makes clothes up to a size 4X, which is still not going to be big enough to accommodate Tess's ass. Tess'd better cut back on the champagne cakes while she can; the day is rapidly approaching when she won't be able to wedge herself into those spandex sausage casings at all.

 

[FuckDuckSeagull]

Omg that comparison picture is amazing! I suppose it was a "friend" again that shoooped without her knowing.

Edit. I just noticed how goddamn stretched those shorts are. You can see her underwear

 

[JambledUpWords]

 

[Water-T]

ETA: I just checked, and Flabletics only makes clothes up to a size 4X, which is still not going to be big enough to accommodate Tess's ass. Tess'd better cut back on the champagne cakes while she can; the day is rapidly approaching when she won't be able to wedge herself into those spandex sausage casings at all.

Hasn't there been prior postings where it was obvious that part of the outfit they gave her didn't fit and she wore a similar piece instead? If I recall, the top was supposed to have a back, but the one Tess wore had spaghetti straps instead.

So if she can't shove her manatee carcass in it, she'll just wear a look alike piece and pray no one notices.

ProTip, Tess: just because your asspatters don't notice doesn't mean we won't.

 

[bloomingcactus]

Wtf is this expression? She looks so freaking ugly. No one wears full drag makeup while moo-ddling athletic wear. Maybe the clothes are so tight it hurts to breathe.

 

[CobraPlissken]

There is that video that has been posted here I think from when she was on UK tv over a year ago and then she needed help getting up.
She is even bigger now and has purple beetus feet and we are supposed to believe she takes walks and works out?

I guess I get having plus size models but that isn't Tess any longer.
She is visibly disabling herself into an early grave.
Is cheap marketing really worth supporting something like that?

She was so much smaller back then. Now that I think of it, how did she get up after taking that recent photo where's she's sitting on the floor? I hope it's not Jolene, for her own sake. If even trained nurses (who learn about the better ways to carry weight and move patients without hurting themselves) can hurt themselves badly to the point of disablement by hauling up deathfats, it would be much worse for an untrained person.

 

[George Floyd Sneed]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=WOlDBsHAXFI
She was so much smaller back then. Now that I think of it, how did she get up after taking that recent photo where's she's sitting on the floor? I hope it's not Jolene, for her own sake. If even trained nurses (who learn about the better ways to carry weight and move patients without hurting themselves) can hurt themselves badly to the point of disablement by hauling up deathfats, it would be much worse for an untrained person.

She likely had to roll around or crawl on the floor until she found something in the hotel that gives her a good enough grip to grab and pull herself up. I think there are handicap friendly hotel rooms that have various handle bars to help her up too. That’s the only way she can get her 400+ pound body in and out of the bathtubs as well.

You’d think that while she pulls up on the bar and hangs on for dear life that it’s time to give up the sheet cakes but that’s not #radicalselflove so looks like it’s up to society to accommodate her, y’all!

 

[LetThemEatCake]

Tha video really shows how short she is. All he other non-model women are slightly taller than her. Models are typically way taller than the average woman, five or six inches above average, minimum. Tess is actually shorter than average, 5' 2" at most. I have no idea why anyone ever thought it was a good idea to hire her as a plus model given her height, never mind her girth. It really boggles the mind.

 

[FuckDuckSeagull]

I just realized. Her BMI is over goddamn 60!

I need to lie down.

 

[Polexia Aphrodisia]

I'm still baffled by the scores of people who gleefully tear apart and bully girls with anorexia, but saying ANYTHING about an eat beast is "fat shaming," "body policing," "not inclusive," or "phobic."
Seems people have no issue braying like a fucking jackass SPED: "Hurple derple eat a burger!" "Someone give her a sandwich!" and calling girls "spoops." whatever the fuck that's supposed to mean.

Anorexia is NOT a fucking epidemic. Holy shit...if it actually was, you'd never be able to stretch your arms out from side to side without hitting one. But guess what we DO have an overabundance of?

It's because being thin takes discipline and work. You have to make sure you are eating the right foods, and appropriate amount of food, and keeping relatively fit.
Or, in the case of anorexia, it's discipline to the part of disorder.

It takes a lack of discipline and work to get fat. Your monkey brain says "yummy, sugar good! Preservative good! Bright color good! Tastes good, eat more! Am bored, eat tasty!" and you listen to it, self-soothing with food even though it's not healthy for you and refusing to exercise because it's hard or not fun.

So that translates into fat people "not being able to help it" or being somehow exempt from criticism, because personal responsibility isn't the fashion these days and hasn't been for years.

It's like the burnouts and dumb kids in school making fun of the overachieving nerd valedictorians. Trying is uncool.

 

[SnarkySperg]

I'm still baffled by the scores of people who gleefully tear apart and bully girls with anorexia, but saying ANYTHING about an eat beast is "fat shaming," "body policing," "not inclusive," or "phobic."
Seems people have no issue braying like a fucking jackass SPED: "Hurple derple eat a burger!" "Someone give her a sandwich!" and calling girls "spoops." whatever the fuck that's supposed to mean.

Anorexia is NOT a fucking epidemic. Holy shit...if it actually was, you'd never be able to stretch your arms out from side to side without hitting one. But guess what we DO have an overabundance of?

More people die of obesity related complications annually than of anorexia.

"Wouldn't trade being a mom," lol. She already did that the moment she kicked Rylee out of her life.

Also, Bowie is the spitting image of Nick. How long until that along with his emerging bad attitude from her poor parenting triggers her to ship him off to someone in her family or Nick's? I can truly see her getting rid of him around 12/13 just like she did with Rylee, maybe even earlier so she can have her forties to herself. Little kids are cute; mouthy tweens are not.

Do you really think she's going to be alive in 8-9 years?

 

[JambledUpWords]

 

[Daddy's Little Kitten]

I'm pretty sure she couldn't wear that ringpop