- Joined
- Sep 3, 2014
I've only seen two memes crawl out of it: Traitor!, and Lobster Troopers.
I guess Rose toys not selling is one too, but it's only funny in the corporate failure sense.
Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off
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I guess Rose toys not selling is one too, but it's only funny in the corporate failure sense.
- Joined
- May 3, 2019
I was just thinking about this myself. The ST feels like a Focus test product.
- Joined
- May 31, 2019
CONFESSION TIME: The Original Trilogy is the only Star Wars property I recognize. The rest of the movies were unnecessary cash grabs that should never have been made. Oh, I understand WHY they were made. I understand that no one is made of stone and to leave a profitable franchise like this on the table for the sake of artistic integrity would require willpower that no human possesses. I understand the strength of the worldbuilding and that people would want to make side stories and non-canon works surrounding the Original Trilogy for fun and profit. I even understand why the Holiday special and those damn Ewok Adventure specials were made. I just think that the Original Trilogy works better as a standalone creation, than it does as part of a greater series of movies.
TL;DR: Prequels and sequels to the OT could have been done, but changes would have had to have been made to the fundamental structure of the series. George's quest to "Make the Prequel Trilogy" was pretty much doomed from the start, thanks to the existing episode numbering system. And I haven't even gotten into how creatively destructive the idea of setting the Sequel Trilogy 30 years after the ROTJ movie was. But that's a rant for another time.
I rarely hear people talk about the biggest problem with the Prequel Trilogy, namely, the fact that it's not a damn prequel at all! The films are numbered 1, 2 and 3. Which means that they are intended to be watched in the order they are numbered in. The problem is, that the film series works better overall if Episodes 4,5 and 6 are consumed first. Watching the events of the prequels before the OT reduces the OT's dramatic effectiveness,; the OT is a story that thrives off of suspense - off of not knowing what's around the corner. The discovery of Luke's parentage must be as much of a surprise to the audience as it is to Luke, as that's the meaningful moment that opens up another level to the story and robs Luke and the audience of a "simple solution" to the heroes' problems. Now if Luke kills Vader, he's killing his own Dad, a man who still loves him and who might be spiritually redeemable in spite of his terrible acts. Ignore what FlightoftheBumblebee says, - the "Luke I am Your Father" twist is one of the great movie twists of all time. And if said twist gets spoiled by watching Episodes 1-3 before watching Episode 5, it gets deflated and loses its effectiveness, as anytime you see Luke on film, you're thinking "Aw, when is he going to find out that Vader IS his father?" Then when the reveal finally happens, you're thinking "Aw, Luke found out Vader is his father and now he is sad," instead of thinking "HOLY SHIT! VADER is Luke's father? This fundamentally changes everything!"
Another example of a twist being ruined by watching the "Prequel Trilogy" first: the whole lesson about Yoda. Luke goes to Dagobah to get trained by Yoda, expecting Yoda to be a big strong warrior guy. Instead Luke discovers that he is a little gnome type thing, thus learning the lesson that strength in the Force isn't dependent on a person's physical status. This lesson loses its impact if we watch Episodes 1-3 before watching Episode 5, because we already KNOW that Yoda's a strong Jedi master - we're just waiting for Luke to get up to speed with that info. If we discover the true identity of Yoda at the same time Luke does, then WE learn the same lesson that Luke does, at the same time that he does, thus causing us to reflect upon our own prejudices and take said lesson to heart.
So why did George Lucas number the original Trilogy Episodes 4-6? Because he (at the time) probably believed that the "rest" of the series would never get made, and he wanted to use the numbering as a gimmick, as an homage to the old Republic movie serials of his youth; to give the audience the feeling that they were stepping into a bigger story and give the universe a sense of epic grandness. Unfortunately, the numbering doesn't WORK if you go ahead and MAKE the rest of the serial as numbered, since a film other than Episode 4 now becomes first in the watching order, and the "Prequel Trilogy" isn't technically a prequel at all. If Lucas had wanted to make the PT an ACTUAL prequel, he should have changed the numbering of the movies, making the Original Trilogy the first set of movies that should be watched, and set the events before the original Star Wars in a set of sequel movies, told via Flashback (like parts of Godfather 2.) You could have a "sequel trilogy" that involves the events that happened post-ROTJ, with Luke trying to set up a new Jedi order and Leia and Han cleaning up after the defeat of the Empire. Then you have Luke learning the story of his father's life and training, with those events being told via flashback scenes. A narrative within a narrative, if you will.
Another example of a twist being ruined by watching the "Prequel Trilogy" first: the whole lesson about Yoda. Luke goes to Dagobah to get trained by Yoda, expecting Yoda to be a big strong warrior guy. Instead Luke discovers that he is a little gnome type thing, thus learning the lesson that strength in the Force isn't dependent on a person's physical status. This lesson loses its impact if we watch Episodes 1-3 before watching Episode 5, because we already KNOW that Yoda's a strong Jedi master - we're just waiting for Luke to get up to speed with that info. If we discover the true identity of Yoda at the same time Luke does, then WE learn the same lesson that Luke does, at the same time that he does, thus causing us to reflect upon our own prejudices and take said lesson to heart.
So why did George Lucas number the original Trilogy Episodes 4-6? Because he (at the time) probably believed that the "rest" of the series would never get made, and he wanted to use the numbering as a gimmick, as an homage to the old Republic movie serials of his youth; to give the audience the feeling that they were stepping into a bigger story and give the universe a sense of epic grandness. Unfortunately, the numbering doesn't WORK if you go ahead and MAKE the rest of the serial as numbered, since a film other than Episode 4 now becomes first in the watching order, and the "Prequel Trilogy" isn't technically a prequel at all. If Lucas had wanted to make the PT an ACTUAL prequel, he should have changed the numbering of the movies, making the Original Trilogy the first set of movies that should be watched, and set the events before the original Star Wars in a set of sequel movies, told via Flashback (like parts of Godfather 2.) You could have a "sequel trilogy" that involves the events that happened post-ROTJ, with Luke trying to set up a new Jedi order and Leia and Han cleaning up after the defeat of the Empire. Then you have Luke learning the story of his father's life and training, with those events being told via flashback scenes. A narrative within a narrative, if you will.
TL;DR: Prequels and sequels to the OT could have been done, but changes would have had to have been made to the fundamental structure of the series. George's quest to "Make the Prequel Trilogy" was pretty much doomed from the start, thanks to the existing episode numbering system. And I haven't even gotten into how creatively destructive the idea of setting the Sequel Trilogy 30 years after the ROTJ movie was. But that's a rant for another time.
- Joined
- Oct 7, 2014
The Prequels at least had:
-More intricate fighting sequences
-"Hello there! 8D"
-Endless Palpatine quotes
-Darth Maul
-The inspiration for Genndy Clone Wars
-"This is where the fun begins."
-Ewan McGregor giving it his all
-Duel of Fates
-More intricate fighting sequences
-"Hello there! 8D"
-Endless Palpatine quotes
-Darth Maul
-The inspiration for Genndy Clone Wars
-"This is where the fun begins."
-Ewan McGregor giving it his all
-Duel of Fates
- Joined
- Dec 14, 2017
I have heard it said, and tend to agree, that in order to not spoil one of the biggest twists in cinema history, one should watch the Star Wars movies in the following order
1. A New Hope.
2. Empire Strikes Back.
3. Attack of the Clones.
4. Revenge of the Sith.
5. Return of the Jedi.
You still get all the important info, and the prequels can act more as a grand series of flashback to explain just what the fuck happened, and why Anakin became Vader.
This method also allows you to not watch The Phantom Menace, which is great because it's fucking terrible.
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2019
Wait, what? You're gonna have to expound on that.
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2018
Why would you have people watch Attack of the Clones, the worst or second worst movie in the series, over Phantom Menace? I've never been a fan of this lauded "breaking things up" method (which I can't even remember the name of) that removes Phantom Menace. It's confusing, complicated, and the person you're talking to is just going to watch The Phantom Menace anyways. Watch the OT and then if you want more, watch the PT. It's not particularly complicated.
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- Joined
- Jul 13, 2019
Fuck that, you should recite latin scripture while burning incense candles. Then, follow a strictly time coded viewers guide. Afterwards, you will flog yourself in front of shrine of mint conditioned, unopened, Bib Fortunata figures.
After the flogging, comes the offering. You must ejaculate to a signed photograph of Frank Oz..
I got a lot of kids hooked on the series...
- Joined
- Jun 11, 2018
Ever since Disney acquired Star Wars, fanpandering has probably been the one thing they're best at.
Let's look at Clone Wars that they canceled abruptly after Season 5.
Fans: #FinishTheCloneWars
Disney: OK, here's a few arcs packaged as "The Lost Missions."
Fans: #FinishTheCloneWars
Disney: OK, here's an arc that was written and partially animated.
Fans: #FinishTheCloneWars
Disney: OK, here's a dozen new episodes, but only if you pay to see them on our new Disney+ service.
And Rebels:
Fans: We want to know what happened to our fave characters!
Disney: OK, Season 1 will end with Ahsoka coming back and Season 2 will be a Clone Wars family reunion.
Fans: #GetThrawnIn
Disney: Fine. But we'll have him cucked by Space Aladdin and flying space whales.
Fans: Don't let Vader kill Ahsoka!
Disney: Alright. Dave, make a space anus to save your waifu through time travel.
And let's not overlook the ST as a whole. The pandering wokeness is so thick one needs a lightsaber to cut through it far enough to see anything remotely recognizable as Star Wars content. We also have Kylo Ren's line about destroying the past and leaving it behind. This isn't just a line to Rey, however. It's Disney's own mindset in demanding fans forget about pre-Disney Star Wars and learn to accept and enjoy their dreck.
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2016
Ren literally says that to the audience, not Rey. He is looking STRAIGHT INTO THE CAMERA when he says this.
Actually, that happens a lot with Rey/Ren interactions. Rey is Space Bella Swan, so this makes sense, as it allows fangirls to project more easily.
- Joined
- Jun 17, 2019
Incorrect. The true and honest way of watching George Lucas' Star Wars movies is:
1. A New Hope
2. Empire Strikes Back
3. Mr. Plinkett's review of The Phantom Menace
4. Mr. Plinkett's review of Attack of the Clones
5. Mr. Plinkett's review of Revenge of the Sith
6. Return of the Jedi
- Joined
- Jan 3, 2019
He missed the irony that it was said by a villain, you know, a character you aren't supposed to agree with.
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2016
Ren is the Edward Cullen of the new generation. That's the intent.
- Joined
- Sep 7, 2019
don't even remember much of ep2, there must be a reason I repressed it. but yeah, especially jarjar in PM got a lot of hate, which imo is a bit sad because it wasn't really the fault of the character, it was solely lucas trying to make both a kids movie (hence jarjar and his antics) and then endless dry politics and shit for the grown-ups and failing at both - although, if you ask people growing up with the PT they have much less of a problem with him. and it's not like jarjar got treated any better later on, they even whore him out to get fucked by wibblewobble wendig, which is probably one of the reasons people like the evil twist (even when kinda eh) since it gives the character some form of justice.
nothing wrong with leaving room for prequels, the main problem was even lucas fell for the "everything is about skywalker" (sure, it was about the fall of vader, but it didn't need 3 fucking episodes for that) and re-use chars which, considering it's a whole fucking galaxy, just looks stupid. ofc people want more of chars they like (which makes most series in any medium that runs too long just shit after a certain point), but that doesn't mean you can't have new characters at all. but easy toy sales I guess. new chars would also prevent shit like ping-pong yoda (dude's a force master and a midget, having a physical confrontation of all things was so exceptional stupid it bothered me even back then).
it didn't help that the main story, vader, was pretty shit and his "fall" was anything but. personally I came to the conclusion the PT works best when you treat anakin like a hick with a big dick, makes him falling for sheev's "hurr we can save her NOPE but we can try now" trick more bearable.
EP1 should've been just a fun adventure movie with more qui-gon and obi, jarjar as wacky sidekick and slowly alluding to things, then move the whole end of ep1 into 1-2 arcs of ep2 and go full blast in ep3. people would've probably whined about "no vader", but obi is older and essential to his story so there is nothing wrong dedicating a whole episode to him to set him up better - and it would save us from disney trying to destroy that character too.
- Joined
- Apr 16, 2017
Luke serves as the narrator for most of the book although I don't remember who the other narrator was. Could've been Leia or Han for all I care. They occasionally make references to irl things by comparing certain characters or items to something from the real world, like "european" or "spaghetti soup", or calling C-3PO the Tin-Man of Oz. There's also an ROTJ novelization by Disney, but all I remember about it is that they retconned the story 3PO was telling the Ewoks by claiming that Space Aladdin and Ahsoka were also part of the story he was telling and that it was Space Aladdin who started the rebellion by claiming that "he was the one who ignited the spark of Rebellion by spreading a message of hope across the galaxy" rather than Bail Organa or Mon Mothma.
Honestly, I'll never stop wondering why they made a literal Aladdin such a hot shot in SW and made a kid's show such an important linchpin for nu-Wars. The kid is Aladdin, word for word. Even his dad is an exact duplicate of Aladdin's dad from the third Aladdin movie while Space Aladdin's mom looks like Aladdin's mom from the Disney comics but with a space hijab.
Anyway, here's the big news for the day. Galaxy's Edge in Florida is doing even worse than the one in California. When even one of the top travel agents in the country says you fucked up then you know ya dun fucked up big time.
- Joined
- Aug 20, 2014
I like my order:
1) A New Hope
2) The Empire Strikes Back
3) What if Episode I Was Actually GOOD?
4) What if Episode II Was Actually GOOD?
5) What if Episode III Was Actually GOOD?
6) Return of The Jedi
But yours is better.
BTW, those links about making the prequels actually GOOD... Those are them - and what I stand by in actually making the overall crappy PT, well - not crap. Too bad Plinkett making fun of these crappy movies is much funnier, honestly (and if these 3 films were good, Plinkett's critiques wouldn't exist. I'm NOT thinking anyone would be happy with that, now would we?).
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2019
I never really thought about the angle of Disney's Star Wars just being Twilight in space, but it makes a lot of sense.
Whoa, it's doing even worse? That is just unbelievable.
- Joined
- Nov 4, 2017
That is some pretty solid fuck-up fixing that guy did.
Only thing I'd counter him with is Maul dying was important to the over all flow, where otherwise the Jedi council would have been on their guard for more sith. The main problem was Maul needed to be replaced by someone more of an obvious threat, not Dooku.
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2018
I think his Episode III video went off the rails and veered into "this is fanfiction and has nothing to do with actually making the prequels good" territory. Episode 3's problems lie in pacing, catch up work from the flaws of the first two prequels, and the continued presence of awkward acting in certain scenes. The actual story was mostly fine and outside of maybe removing Yoda and the Emperor's duel and reworking Padme's death (she should have tried to stab Anakin) I'd keep it pretty much exactly the same. I have no idea, for instance, why he decided to remove Anakin hunting down/massacring the Jedi. It was imperative we saw at least part of it on screen to prevent the kind of defenders we see now with Kylo Ren.
In fact, I really don't think a lot of his ideas would necessarily play out "better", he's doing the exact same thing Lucas is praised for, which is coming up with ideas. He may very well have fallen into the same traps regarding dialogue and directing performances.
- Joined
- Apr 16, 2017
Only version of the prequels I need is the very well edited one by a Japanese dude. Its in Japanese obviously but that honestly seems to improve the dialogue. Then again, I honestly don't really have a hate boner for the prequels (maybe one for AotC but its not as strong as it used to be) so I can rewatch them just fine (although I still wonder what could've been considering their creativity or if the whole thing had just been done as a miniseries by Genndy). I should mention that the novelization of ROTS by Matthew Stover was far better than the film itself and does a better job of handling Anakin's fall. TPM's novel also does a better job of delving into the Sith side of things. I never got a chance to read AotC's novelization though but since you seem well versed with SW novels, did you ever read it? What are your thoughts on it? Does it improve or do nothing for AotC?
Anyway, enough of beating this dead horse of a topic. Here's some more news: Reshoots are STILL ongoing and it looks like IX is turning out to be a massive dumpster fire.
Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Continues Reshoots
Fall is here and that means fans are just a few short months away from Star Wars: The Rise of [...]
comicbook.com
'Rise of Skywalker' Leaks: Rey's Rumored Ending Teased in Official Comic
"There is another."
Also Kylo Ren visited the Dark Side cave and may have been raped by Snoke there while visions of his parents watched. Predictably, fangirls on reddit wet themselves... This comes from the preview of the upcoming new Snoke comic which also supposedly hints how Palpatine survived... he just floated like Kylo Ren did...
This particular page is Snoke teaching Kylo Ren how to fly. Explaining that he never would have mastered this technique if he had continued to be pampered by Luke.
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