🎨 Artcow Iconoclast / Jonathan Mack Sweet - The Chris-Chan of Arkansas

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Just more evidence that Sweet is very similar to CWC. Just as Sweet believes he can get more money via collecting cans than working, so Chris believes his tugboat gives him more money than a job. At this point, I think his tugboat is roughly equivalent to Virginia's minimum wage, but he could work part time and still get his tugboat. I wonder what Sweet's tugboat looks like; regardless, they could both get part time jobs and keep their tugboats and actually do... well, not well for themselves, but not terribly.

Also any time I took a "cubicle drone" job I made at least a couple of dollars above minimum wage. Even basic data entry places go above minimum wage.

It seems that no matter the circumstance or subject matter, Sweet has to pose himself as the hero, the winner, the one who's right. Any idiot* could easily see that having a job would net him more money than scrounging around through other people's garbage**, but Jon has to rationalize and applaud his reason for perpetual unemployment as a desire to put 'freedom' and personal satisfaction over monetary gain.

"I make more collecting cans than I ever did on all three of those [previous] jobs anyhow", he says. No doubt. As Absinthe said above, while Jon doesn't necessarily out-and-out lie (not like CWC, for comparison), he's still dishonest, often obfuscating or framing the truth in a way that benefits him. Of course Jon makes more money recycling cans than in his other three jobs. His other three jobs weren't jobs and didn't pay. The Herald was a student newspaper that he occasionally contributed to, they wouldn't have paid him, or if they did, it would be minimal. His work in his mom's boyfriend's [?] store was unpaid physical labor. And the third shop never materialized. Jon's never held a paying job to begin with, so selling plasma would net him more pay than any of his former employment did.

He's not done yet. He's gotta finish up with "and out on the road I have a lot more freedom and happiness than an easily-replaceable cookie-cutter cubicle drone like you could ever dream of." Wotta poor, pathetic little man. There are at least three things Jon is trying to do here, and he fails miserably at each one.

1. He tries to equate collecting cans to steady employment. Collecting cans is not a job. A job involves discipline and hard work, even if you're self-employed (heck, probably even more so if you're self-employed). Jon can walk about at his leisure along the road. If he finds a can, boom - he considers it work. Not the same thing, of course, but heaven forbid Jon actually exert himself.

2. He tries to put down his critics. Again unable to make a decent argument, and in a laughable attempt to look like a tough guy, Jon has to rely on invective, specifically "easily-replaceable cookie-cutter cubicle drone". What he fails to realize is that, comparatively speaking, this is not an insult. First off, it doesn't apply to all of us here; not all of us work in a cubicle (I'm a kindy and elementary teacher in South Korea). Second, the "easily-replaceable" jab fails to take into account that some of us may be considered kind of a big deal where we work. Jon was easily replaceable, so he's projecting that on to us. Which leads us right into:

3. He tries to frame his failure as a success. MarineTrainedTard put it perfectly: There's one common element behind all of Jon's firings, at that is Jon Sweet. He's unemployed because he's lazy, immature, and disrespectful of the property and person of others. Thing is, he's a wimp who can't withstand confrontation, thus he's quickly and easily booted from whatever position he's in without getting a say in the matter. Jon is totally beaten here. He can't win. So what's he do? He re-frames the narrative to reflect his "freedom" from "rules" and "browbeating", when in fact what's actually happening is that he's too classless and stupid to get an actual job. This is the Sweetian narrative: He needs to be the hero, no matter how much of a loser it proves him to be.

*To be sure, none of you folks are idiots. Just Jon.

**When other people do it, then they are helping the environment and putting a little jingle in their jeans. When Jon does it, he's scrounging through garbage
 
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It seems that no matter the circumstance or subject matter, Sweet has to pose himself as the hero, the winner, the one who's right. Any idiot* could easily see that having a job would net him more money than scrounging around through other people's garbage**, but Jon has to rationalize and applaud his reason for perpetual unemployment as a desire to put 'freedom' and personal satisfaction over monetary gain.

"I make more collecting cans than I ever did on all three of those [previous] jobs anyhow", he says. No doubt. As Absinthe said above, while Jon doesn't necessarily out-and-out lie (not like CWC, for comparison), he's still dishonest, often obfuscating or framing the truth in a way that benefits him. Of course Jon makes more money recycling cans than in his other three jobs. His other three jobs weren't jobs and didn't pay. The Herald was a student newspaper that he occasionally contributed to, they wouldn't have paid him, or if they did, it would be minimal. His work in his mom's boyfriend's [?] store was unpaid physical labor. And the third shop never materialized. Jon's never held a paying job to begin with, so selling plasma would net him more pay than any of his former employment did.

He's not done yet. He's gotta finish up with "and out on the road I have a lot more freedom and happiness than an easily-replaceable cookie-cutter cubicle drone like you could ever dream of." Wotta poor, pathetic little man. There are at least three things Jon is trying to do here, and he fails miserably at each one.

1. He tries to equate collecting cans to steady employment. Collecting cans is not a job. A job involves discipline and hard work, even if you're self-employed (heck, probably even more so if you're self-employed). Jon can walk about at his leisure along the road. If he finds a can, boom - he considers it work. Not the same thing, of course, but heaven forbid Jon actually exert himself.

2. He tries to put down his critics. Again unable to make a decent argument, and in a laughable attempt to look like a tough guy, Jon has to rely on invective, specifically "easily-replaceable cookie-cutter cubicle drone". What he fails to realize is that, comparatively speaking, this is not an insult. First off, it doesn't apply to all of us here; not all of us work in a cubicle (I'm a kindy and elementary teacher in South Korea). Second, the "easily-replaceable" jab fails to take into account that some of us may be considered kind of a big deal where we work. Jon was easily replaceable, so he's projecting that on to us. Which leads us right into:

3. He tries to frame his failure as a success. MarineTrainedTard put it perfectly: There's one common element behind all of Jon's firings, at that is Jon Sweet. He's unemployed because he's lazy, immature, and disrespectful of the property and person of others. Thing is, he's a wimp who can't withstand confrontation, thus he's quickly and easily booted from whatever position he's in without getting a say in the matter. Jon is totally beaten here. He can't win. So what's he do? He re-frames the narrative to reflect his "freedom" from "rules" and "browbeating", when in fact what's actually happening is that he's too classless and stupid to get an actual job. This is the Sweetian narrative: He needs to be the hero, no matter how much of a loser it proves him to be.

*To be sure, none of you folks are idiots. Just Jon.

**When other people do it, then they are helping the environment and putting a little jingle in their jeans. When Jon does it, he's scrounging through garbage

Jon looks down on those who work to support themselves when that work may not be ideal. The idea of doing work you actually "enjoy" is a relatively recent development in human history and is still pretty much a first-world country notion. It's easy for him to feel too good to do the kinds of labor that keeps his mouth fed and body clothed when he can just live off others' sweat by collecting welfare in his mother's house.
 
Jon looks down on those who work to support themselves when that work may not be ideal. The idea of doing work you actually "enjoy" is a relatively recent development in human history and is still pretty much a first-world country notion. It's easy for him to feel too good to do the kinds of labor that keeps his mouth fed and body clothed when he can just live off others' sweat by collecting welfare in his mother's house.

I find people who think they are entitled to their dream job infuriating. Who hasn't had to work a job they hated to pay the bills? Lord knows I've worked my fair share of jobs that I despised, but I put a smile on my face and sucked it up because as a reasonable adult, I was able to rationalize that it was more important to pay the bills that needed paying than to be in love with my job at that time.

That is not, however, to say, that you cannot change jobs if you are unhappy, but you have to actually put effort into doing so if you want results.
 
I find people who think they are entitled to their dream job infuriating. Who hasn't had to work a job they hated to pay the bills? Lord knows I've worked my fair share of jobs that I despised, but I put a smile on my face and sucked it up because as a reasonable adult, I was able to rationalize that it was more important to pay the bills that needed paying than to be in love with my job at that time.

That is not, however, to say, that you cannot change jobs if you are unhappy, but you have to actually put effort into doing so if you want results.
And the worst part of it is, the "drones" he looks down on are the ones earning his welfare checks for him by doing such drudgery. He could at least say, "Thank you."
 
And the worst part of it is, the "drones" he looks down on are the ones earning his welfare checks for him by doing such drudgery. He could at least say, "Thank you."

Amen.
 
Sweet has been somewhat subdued of late. Perhaps he's just catching up with his comic now that he's got his new laptop working.

Another helping of mixed Sweets!

Firstly, an answer to the question of what his rooms smells like. (If someone could shoop Sweet's face onto that infamous picture of Chris leaning back, surrounded by junk, I would be ever so obliged.) Observant newspaperkoalas may spot potential clues as to why Sweet suffers from laryngitis...

Jonathan M. Sweet said:
Dust, mold, soiled clothing, and the ghosts of many old burritos. I should really clean the room and air it out, but my idiot brother broke the window over a year ago, so it's been boarded up.
(Source, backup)

On whether he had tried using duct tape to solve the window situation.

Jonathan M. Sweet said:
Yes, but that created a new problem when moisture leaked in and cause the plaster to rot. Now I've got several gaping holes in the wall in addition to the broken window.
(Source, backup)

How to fix a cartoon strip that lacks mass appeal? With misogyny!

Jonathan M. Sweet said:
So your complaint/observation is that "Ron's View" is too esoteric. Perhaps if he did a strip parodying something, or had two characters watching TV and making rude comments about the program? That'd more relatable to casual browsers. Example: I bet every man has had this experience: they're watching TV with their wife/girlfriend/mom, and they have to explain every plot point or joke to her because she's too all-fired thick-headed to "get it", so--

Insert KIM expression image "colonial 5" here.

--and I've said too much. ;D

(Source, backup)

Finally, a very enlightening exchange from March 2014

CB said:
Do people still follow your movements online Dr. Belch? It seems to have died off. I haven't seen anything new about you online, though I don't actively search you either.
Jonathan M. Sweet said:
Not in a while. I could start actively posting at the CWCki again, just to stir the pot. I actually planned to post some of my Chris-Chan-related artwork last month, around Feb 24 (Chris' birthday), but then he went and set his got-dang house on fire...so anything I could have done would have been overshadowed by that.
Hoomajocky said:
Do you like being in the spotlight like that, even negatively from those goons? Some say, all press, even bad, is good press.
Jonathan M. Sweet said:
It bothers me when they get too personal with their attacks, like claiming my father wanted to die just to get away from me. Losing my dad was very painful for me, because talking about it actually cost me my girlfriend. On the other hand, it does show what kind of people the left truly are--ignorant, nasty, and cowardly monsters who won't even stand by their own ugly words (since most of the sites where they say this things shut down or disappear shortly after I start linking them to my blog). That will make my dream of ultimately destroying liberalism in America so much easier.
(Source pt 1, source pt 2, backup pt 1, backup pt 2)

There we have it, Koalas and watching Patriot Bronies. Sweet Bro came here to "stir the pot". He looks for our attention. He bumped his thread, looking for a reaction, and then runs away to throw insults from a distance when he gets scared at how strong the reaction is.

The stuff about his father was almost certainly Encyclopaedia Dramatica. It certainly wasn't us Kiwis. ED is a very different place to here, and their "house style" isn't really welcome on our site. Our admin has set up the Lolcow Wiki to provide an alternative to ED which sticks to the facts and doesn't indulge in cruel, childish attempts at humour.

That being said, Sweet's bald selfishness is rather dumbfounding.

"Losing my dad was very painful for me, because talking about it actually cost me my girlfriend."

wow
 
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it does show what kind of people the left truly are--ignorant, nasty, and cowardly monsters who won't even stand by their own ugly words (since most of the sites where they say this things shut down or disappear shortly after I start linking them to my blog). That will make my dream of ultimately destroying liberalism in America so much easier.

:story:
 
Doesn't he mean "The high-school girl who was trolling me decided I was no fun/too depressing/not worth poking with a stick anymore"? I mean, assuming he could be translated to English. Also, we totally need the "horrifying" rating up in here.
Yep, I think when the Chris-Chan you're Julaaying treats the death of his father as one guilt-fueled ticket to China, it's safe to say that any BlueSpike would want to Cash out :D
 
(If someone could shoop Sweet's face onto that infamous picture of Chris leaning back, surrounded by junk, I would be ever so obliged.)

800px-0782-CWCSpread.JPG


My pleasure!
 
"Losing my dad was very painful for me, because talking about it actually cost me my girlfriend."
I seem to remember the only reason he mentioned his father's death was for pity sex. Although I can't remember if he said it in a earlier post or it was from one of the links provided in the thread.
 
I seem to remember the only reason he mentioned his father's death was for pity sex.
Yup. Iconoclast apparently brought up his deceased father with a girl in an attempt to score some pity sex, and she felt uncomfortable and awkward and left him. Iconoclast then said it was painful to him to talk about the loss of his father, because it "cost him his girlfriend".
Of course, one can also question whether or not they were really going out.
 
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Just because I'm feeling waxy, here's a bunch of stuff from Sweet's storehouse of maturity and intellect, Fekul the Baby. Most of it is presented without comment, but take a look at this:

On that note...it might be a sensitive topic, but you've told parts of the story of your love affair with a girl in college before. How did you two first meet? What made that relationship so special? She called me one day looking for my roommate, a guy named Anthony Coleman. He hadn't shown up, so I had the room all to myself. I guess she was with him, or looking to be, but she decided to talk to me instead. So we started a little phone fling. This was six months after I lost my job. I think I may be the first man who ever had a rebound relationshipfrom a campus paper.


About nine every night she'd ring me up and we would--and I apologize if this is getting too graphic--spank off together. Her name was Ashleigh. She wanted to be a model, and could have made it. Mother of God, she was hot. She looked like a young Alicia Silverstone.

039_16321.jpg
AshleighBainks.jpg


Nope.

Again, you've already seen this, but here is the total amount of dialog reportedly spoken between he and Ashlieiegh the last (and first) day he saw her:

"What's with the get-up?" she asked me.

"It's my father's old jacket," I said. "I wear it to honor his memory. I was just about to go to breakfast in the caf over there. Would you like to join me? I'll pay for you."

"I have to go take my mom to work," she said. "You can go on and eat, and then meet me back here in about an hour. 'Kay?"

"Okay."

Terrifying stuff about the death of his dad there, huh?

Not only can Sweet not keep his story straight, he can't maintain the theme of his rants:

After my fling with the lovely Ashleigh Bainks tanked, and I began to turn up some disturbing data on her that suggested she wasn't what she claimed to be, I wrote stories like "Smitten With Her", and "Virago", and the book TIRESIAS, in order to warn people there is a very dangerous girl among you, a wolf in sheep's clothing working the ASU campus, propositioning young foolish men for sex. [...] I bet if she goes back to a guy's room, knifes him, and steals his wallet, they'll want to put her in for a Nobel Peace Prize. No one ever told me, "Good work, you're helping to get the word out, you're a hero"; instead, it was sneers and threats on my life and comments like "Aw, you're just mad because she wouldn't sleep with you" from leftist small-minds. But her, why, she's a pioneer, she's fighting male oppression, she's forward-thinking and taking back. Sure, maybe she squared up and got married and dropped two-point-five calves and put that wild life of blowing fratboys behind her. Doesn't do much for my poor boner, does it?

Uh ... wha ..... Well, which is it, Jon? Are you trying to protect others, or lamenting the unused state of your pointless reproductive organs?


Oh, hey, did you ever wonder what Jon's plan was to sue the folks at ASU? Well, I think I might have, as explained in the emboldened print in the quote below. Oh, it's as nuts as any of Jon's plans, but once again, he displays a distinct lack of basic intelligence here. Check it out:

I have spent the last five years trying to raise a war chest and build an army of loyal followers. I wrote a few books, built a website, offered to give interviews to all the local papers, and tried to hire an attorney. Here's the thing, crapbag: lawyers are expensive. It takes a while to build a legal defense fund, especially when your enemy sees to it no newspaper for miles around will print anything with your name on it. I can't work in a newsroom, get a reporter to talk to me, or even buy ad space. It's called the journalism blacklist. There's another thing, too, called the statute of limitations ... Basically it means the deadline for me to file papers with the court for the original offenses --wrongful termination, defamation of character, perjury--has passed. I might be able to get them on new charges if The Herald slips up and threatens me openly, and I can produce evidence of said threat...or if I can get my hands on concrete evidence--an e-mail, an internal memo, a phone log--documenting The Herald's efforts to derail my success in life. In other words, if I can fool someone into acknowledging the existence of the blacklist, I can use their confession as a peg to hang the faculty advisor on--and it better be a big peg, because she's a whale of a woman. This may be difficult, as all Herald staffers past and present are under strict orders not to speak to me.

Couple problems with this.

1. Jon acknowledges that the staff at the Herald won't talk to him. Torpedo.

2. It is unlikely that the Herald would slip up and threaten him openly, as all evidence indicates that the Herald wants nothing to do with him (such as point number 1).

3. Using the exact same tactical brilliance he displayed when he openly admitted he was going to troll this thread, Jon blatantly announces that he intends to trick someone into acknowledging something that doesn't exist in order to win a court case. Winning a case on evidence you know doesn't exist is dumb enough, but no - he had to go further and tell his plan to the internet.

This other stuff is just because I thought it was interesting. It's spoilered only to make it less cluttered. Thanks for reading.

The only difference between what I did and what a legitimate journalist does is a press badge. I simply did my research and followed up a few leads to figure out just what I had gotten myself into, something I only regret I had not done sooner. Originally, still having feelings for her, I had used the phone number she gave me to track her down to arrange a reconciliation. However, the more I learned about her, the more I realized that some of the things she told me didn't add up. A very rude phone call was made to me by Ashleigh in Aug 2000, denying everything. Caller ID confirms she made this phone call from another phone line at the same address she had used three years ago, and her comments about recieving my letters indicates she has been known to recieve mail there. Yet her father denies she exists. He's either lying or a complete dupe, and I can't tell which is worse. It is possible she has an accomplice, whose name she mentioned in our talk. The name she gave led me to a girl who was student at Arkansas State University back in 1997--in which case she is guilty of aiding and abetting a minor in an act of prostitution and should be questioned.

Yes, I said a minor. Ashleigh's school records indicated she graduated in 2000, three years after our affair began, indicating she may have been below the age of consent despite her claim that she was 18. They also confirmed an earlier suspicion (the one thing Generally Wasted is right about, proving even a blind pig finds an acorn now and again) that she used a fake name with me. All this information I gathered is up at my website, as a public service to the men of A-State. She may still be out there running this game, propositioning men for sex over the phone. She'd be between 23 and 26 now, which means she'd have to pare several years off her age instead of adding them to pass for 18. She may or may not still be working with her accomplice from the old days. They may have recruited other young girls from Trumann and the Jonesboro high schools as part of their scam. This problem has gone unnoticed and unreported by either the Jonesboro Sun or The ASU Herald, for both lack of conclusive evidence and a healthy dose of judicious ass-covering by A-State, who can't bear the slightest whiff of scandal. The blind, deaf, and mute monkeys at administration are all too willing to risk the lives and health of its young men in the name of their own self-interest.

Oh, and that subtle little inference near the end that I'm abusive? Yeah. Totally cheap and uncalled for, asswipe.


Never substantively debate when you can just tire out the opponent with name-calling, is the leftist motto.


Then he misrepresents me by saying I give out my enemies' addresses at my website and order their deaths. Bull. Nowhere on my site do I call for anyone's death, and I only give out Ashleigh's address and phone number in order for people to help her. It's what I call the "thousand mouths" theory: where my voice, literally and figuratively, has failed, I call upon the public to do their duty as Americans and help me to help myself and others by spreading my message. I call on hundreds of people to wake up, see the growing danger, write letters, make phone calls. Convince Ashleigh's father to admit he has a very licentious daughter who needs help and to see she gets it. Convince the people at the College of Communications to give me a new hearing and finally settle an old injustice. Where do you get from this that I want to hurt anyone, General Baseless? Think about it (I know it's hard for a leftie, but do what you can). If I have all their addresses and I really wanted them dead, why would I need your help or anyone else's? I could have just hunted them down and killed them myself. It sure wouldn't have dragged on over nine years. A few weeks, a month, tops. What I'm proposing is a peaceful protest appealing to a mass' frustrations and a bruised sense of justice. There are college students in my audience; parents of college student and young men and women heading off to college next month. Do you want to send Junior to a school where communists run the campus paper and wicked underage girls roam the residence halls and frathouses like horny little predators? Do you want to go to such a school? I thought not. So take a few minutes to pen a nice but firm letter asking The Herald to grant me an interview to talk about what I've done with myself since graduation, sell a few books, and discuss my views in a proper forum.

Finally, General Hateful, canning is a hobby, not my "primary profession". And even if it was, at least it's honest work, something the left fails to comprehend. I've been earning pocket money picking up cans since I was eleven. See, unlike much of the left I didn't have my money handed to me in a trust fund [...] Can money kept me in a steady supply of snacks and laundry quarters all through college. I know what it is to struggle. I come from da hood, yo. I grew up on Broke Black Mountain. Sometimes I think if I hadn't spent all my cash on candy, novelty buttons, and that silly Humpty Dance tee (which went out of style five minutes after I bought it, along with my M.C. Hammer poster) and had socked some away in the bank fifteen or twenty years ago, I could be driving a Porche by now.

When no magazine bought my short stories, rather than sit around and wait for someone to hand me a publishing contract, I invested some of my earnings in publishing two books. They mock me for this, rather than laud my good conservative incentive.

What do you do for a living, might I ask, General Tipsy? And did they train you to do it in college, and stay the hell out of your way while you learned to do it? Because all I ever really took away from college was a few new prejudices and a great recipe for taco pie--and it only cost me a few grand in student loans to do it, which I'm still paying off at this late date...all for an education I wasn't allowed to finish because a glorified copy boy didn't know how to keep his stupid yap shut. And I stand by this no matter what you or Sybs might think.

In short, Sybil, there is no sketch. I haven't seen it, so it doesn't exist. Simple as that.

Speaking of books, 6/06/06 was also the day Anne Coulter released her book Godless, all about the left and their poison religion of liberalism. Coulter's one of the few people besides me who truly understands how utterly hate-filled and depraved the left-wing things are.

[H]e thinks he can get back into college when he acts like an eleven year old? says another moron. I don't know what he/she/it's talking about. This is how I acted the first time around, and for the most part I did perfectly fine.I have not fundamentally changed in twelve years. if anyone has a problem with me there, they've changed too much to be real.
 
Wow, so much here to read, it's like Christmas came early. Thanks, HSMOF!

I like how he refers to working at the campus paper as a "job". That's... that's not what most people would consider a job.

I would love to be the reporter who took Sweet's call when he wanted to get his story about the ASU Newspaper in the local news. To be the reporter who has to listen to an insane retard rant incoherently about the disgusting liberal bastards as some college paper must be somewhat surreal.

EDIT: Hah, he doesn't know what "prostitution" means. If this "Ashleigh" was, indeed, a minor, he may actually not want the cops to investigate, or he may be in for a rude surprise.
 
canning is a hobby, not my "primary profession". And even if it was, at least it's honest work, something the left fails to comprehend.

I come from da hood, yo.



Hot coffee came out of my nose when i read this. I'm in incredible pain yet I can't stop laughing.
 
Most of it is presented without comment, but take a look at this:

Again, you've already seen this, but here is the total amount of dialog reportedly spoken between he and Ashlieiegh the last (and first) day he saw her:

Interesting. So it appears that despite the Ragnarok-like firing from the paper that he traces so much of his downward trajectory to, he was still a student on campus, presumably getting on with his life, half a year later.

And it almost sounds less like she was trolling him (since she called for his roommate) and instead just decided to peace out upon meeting him in person for like one or two minutes.

Sorry Jon, but when you get past the mythology to the facts of the case it's all just so...banal.
 
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Wow, so much here to read, it's like Christmas came early. Thanks, HSMOF!

Hey, my pleasure!

Interesting. So it appears that despite the Ragnarok-like firing from the paper that he traces so much of his downward trajectory to, he was still a student on campus, presumably getting on with his life, half a year later.

Indeed, another odd factor of this story. Also, I couldn't find the quote, but recall that Jon was hoping to procure "a little tail" from his beloved at this point, and went ahead and requested it - something he left out of the exchange above. Anyone know where I can dig it up?

Oh, also - Has anyone read Sweet's account of the dogfight that happened on his front lawn?
 
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