🎨 Artcow Iconoclast / Jonathan Mack Sweet - The Chris-Chan of Arkansas

[DrChristianTroy]

I heard it on the radio and thought it was funny. Big deal.

So you're not only unfunny but you tell street jokes. Your comedy is basically at the same level as Gallagher.

 

[darkhorse816]

So you're not only unfunny but you tell street jokes. Your comedy is basically at the same level as Gallagher.

I'd go one step further and say Rob Schneider.

 

[DrChristianTroy]

I'd go one step further and say Rob Schneider.

See Gallagher's stealing jokes he hears on the street and racism fit him better.

There will always be a need for printed books. They may sit on archive shelves while CD -ROMS and Kindles rule the market for a few years, but there's always old duffers like me who prefer the feel of paper under their fingertips and the smell of an old book...it's familiar, pleasant, like the waft of an old lover's perfume.

CD-Roms? Seriously? 2002 called, they wanted to tell you you've been passed by.

Magazine editor...I think I still have the e-mail saved on my old Win 97.

Another claim without any proof.

 

[Holdek]

I heard it on the radio and thought it was funny. Big deal.

So you do have a habit of plagiarizing.

wait this clown went to ASU?

not like appalachian state right?

Arkansas State

can anyone describe iconoclast in one sentence

He's basically Chris but replace "males" and "trolls" with "liberals" and add seven years to his age.

The parallels between the two are striking (see the OP).

I dont feel like reading 40 pages. How does stealing someone elses work translate to him as an over arching conspiracy to destroy his life.

It's a way for him to understand a traumatic event.

 

[The_Iconoclast]

Hardly. It's an old joke that's been making the rounds for 20 years. I just updated it with Barry-Boy's name. That's the beauty of liberalism-- same old stale, tired tricks, just change a name here and there.

I always hear about people in worse situations than me but suddenly get the Ghost or whatever and totally turn their lives around in a year, yay!...but tell me, how long does it last before they fall off the wagon and end up back before a judge? Another year? Six months? Two? One? I take about five years between every 9-to-5 gig to get my head straight, and it still doesn't work out. Sure, if it's a choice between straightening up and getting a job or rotting in prison for five to 10, I can see it... but I've been in an emotional prison for twice as long. There's no hope of parole for me.

It sounds like people also want you to experiment with things that enhance readability, like font and text placement. I agree. It would really contribute to the flow of your comic.

I've noticed I textwall a lot more when writing off the cuff or doing last-minute rewrites to a storyboard. I'm trying to have my thoughts better organized before I begin pencilling. I bought some notebooks and wrote most of seasons eight and nine longhand, and it's really working. The pages look much better now.

But in all honesty, I could do a whole comic with no speech bubbles (and have), and these pinheads would still find something to bitch about, because they are sad, broken little people who cannot look outside their narrow little definition of "normal" to embrace new ideas.

So you do have a habit of plagiarizing.
The parallels between [him and Chris] are striking (see the OP).

Yeah, that's all on you, buddy. Again--up to the same old stale, tired tricks for fifteen, 20 years. There comes a point where you cross a line between silly fratboy pranks ("Hey, duhh--let's break that crazy kid down the hall's door lock by jamming a roll'a pennies in it, hurr hurr hurr") and full-blown, prosecutable crimes (attempted murder, sexual solicitation). There is something deeply, stupidly wrong with you people, and I would love to see some of you locked up.

 

[CatParty]

Hardly. It's an old joke that's been making the rounds for 20 years. I just updated it with Barry-Boy's name. That's the beauty of liberalism-- same old stale, tired tricks, just change a name here and there.

I always hear about people in worse situations than me but suddenly get the Ghost or whatever and totally turn their lives around in a year, yay!...but tell me, how long does it last before they fall off the wagon and end up back before a judge? Another year? Six months? Two? One? I take about five years between every 9-to-5 gig to get my head straight, and it still doesn't work out. Sure, if it's a choice between straightening up and getting a job or rotting in prison for five to 10, I can see it... but I've been in an emotional prison for twice as long. There's no hope of parole for me.


I've noticed I textwall a lot more when writing off the cuff or doing last-minute rewrites to a storyboard. I'm trying to have my thoughts better organized before I begin pencilling. I bought some notebooks and wrote most of seasons eight and nine longhand, and it's really working. The pages look much better now.

But in all honesty, I could do a whole comic with no speech bubbles (and have), and these pinheads would still find something to bitch about, because they are sad, broken little people who cannot look outside their narrow little definition of "normal" to embrace new ideas.


Yeah, that's all on you, buddy. Again--up to the same old stale, tired tricks for fifteen, 20 years. There comes a point where you cross a line between silly fratboy pranks ("Hey, duhh--let's break that crazy kid down the hall's door lock by jamming a roll'a pennies in it, hurr hurr hurr") and full-blown, prosecutable crimes (attempted murder, sexual solicitation). There is something deeply, stupidly wrong with you people, and I would love to see some of you locked up.

And you should also be locked up for being a lolcow

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

The more I try to read this thread, the bigger a migraine I get. Jesus Christ, I thought I had issues. My elderly schizophrenic roommate is less delusional than this guy---& this is a woman who talks to her "spirit guides" in the shower at four in the morning.

 

[Holdek]

Last night I dashed off an e-mail to the University president, presenting the new evidence and requested he reopen my case.

Oh yeah. So what was his response?

 

[WWWWolf]

Oh, yes, that long nattering review where you said absolutely nothing. Just vague complains and veiled insults. I didn't hear you say one word about what you would have done different if you'd written the story. I bet you would have had David smash down the wall and run around the city like a great, buffoonish invisible Godzilla. And then you say something like, "Well, hey, if you would only change everything about your story and write something that goes completely against your fundamental beliefs, then I'll love you and tell all my friends to buy your books!" Screw you. I hear arrogant little critics like you talk, and it makes me want to peel the skin off their faces with a knife. I had one little prick of an editor who told me a story I gave him, based on my shop experience, could be the next To Kill A Mockingbird if I would submit a total rewrite in which the "racist shopkeeper" was the villain and I extolled the virtues of the poor colored boy who steals an item from his shop. He didn't get it. It was based on my life, and I despised that kid. He hung around and pissed me off continually asking stupid questions and constantly touching the merchandise--never bought anything, just wanted to be a nuisance. I told my idiot partner to send him away, but he thought the kid harmless and let him have the run of the shop. So one day he sold Dale a mower for $20, and we came to find out later it was stolen. The police showed up and I had to talk them out of probably pressing very serious charges. And that angers me. I'm very defensive about my work, because it's highly personal. When you attack on of my stories, you attack me, my life, my friends, my experiences and perception of events. "Better" books aren't necessarily the books I want to write. Changing my drawing style will make the work less real to me. In short, I won't sell out.

Ah, so your problem is that you cannot utilise my critique as is and need more useful, practical advice. Very well, enough with consumer advice and more on practical writing advice.

I think I already made one point perfectly clear - I didn't think the basic premise of the story was too terrible. I don't know where you got the idea that I'd make the protagonist "smash down the wall and run around the city like a great, buffoonish invisible Godzilla". You probably know, just like everyone who reads or writes knows, that overall plot is usually the least interesting part of the narrative. Things happen in the stories, and the audience has no choice but to accept it. At this point, I absolutely won't throw The Hero with a Thousand Faces at you and say "see, your plot progresses pretty much as Campbell said it did". Why? No one cares. We enjoy stories even when we have seen the exact same plot structure literally everywhere. (A while ago, I watched The Terminator. Found it bloody awesome that Sarah Connor is literally facing mythological struggles of all memorable heroes since times immemorial, except this time it's to kick-ass 1980s soundtrack. Don't try this sort of literary analysis unless you're drunk, though. It's more amusing that way.)

In short, plot is something the stories have. The audience can accept anything as long as something interesting happens. You can't usually salvage a story by simply changing its direction.

Instead, my first criticism with the story was that it didn't really have much substance around that story. You had come up with an interesting story premise, and you had come up with lots of very interesting little details. Even your writing style was okay - I always maintain that you have some writing skill, make no mistake at that.

Purely as a story, I found the story defensible enough. What I questioned was its worth as a marketable piece of literature.

So what would I have done differently? Good question. A damn good question.

You see, the story is something that I have kind of written many times over. Like I told you before, I absolutely defend the idea that you can write stories based on your dreams and weird little ideas. There have been number of times that I've gotten this weird little idea that I've started obsessing over. I get the inescapable feeling that I have to commit this idea to the paper - that I need to write that story down before I die, goddamn it.
...but then I notice that the story probably doesn't have commercial potential.
And I don't give a fuck about that. I just drop it off in the Internet. For free. I believe in the story. I realise people might even hate the story, but I don't give a damn. It's out there. I always hope someone finds it interesting. Every now and then, I get messages or emails that say that those were prett cute stories, thank ye so much. Makes me happy.
A lot of writers make the mistake of just shelving those stories indefinitely. Screw that. If you really believe in a story, just stick it out there. Get the damn thing out.

But why did you go through the length of going through the publisher? Why is it out there?
What's the big darn principle behind charging 1€ for it? As soon as you start charging money, you need to start asking if you're going to disappoint people.
You may think that it's the principle of things that you're charging money for your labour, but you always have to remember that the readers' time is worth money, too. Even if it's arguing about as small sums as 1€. If it's about the principle of things for the writer, then dagnabit, so it's going to be about the principle of things for the readers too.

And that is why I wouldn't charge money for this kind of stories. Someone's going to find the purchase disappointing. And all of a sudden, you have a rage-filled forum discussion over a 1€ purchase. It's happening, and the rest of the world is asking why the hell is it happening.

So I consider this an inadvisable choice in general. I agree that there is one thing that is even worse than this: not publishing the work at all in any form. If you believe in the story, you shouldn't sit on it. And even if you don't, someone else might believe in it. It might make someone's day.

I believe in your story. I know you believed in the story. Someone who would just stumble on the story would believe in your story would not. I don't have any faith in totally random buyers, though. They have started longer and much much more pointless arguments over even more ridiculous things.

I totally get the personal nature of your work. I'm currently working on a story that I could only describe as a very personal and a very emotional project, and the writing has been going for years. I was devastated when I got the first feedback and everyone was telling the story was terrible. I went back improving the story. The next round went considerably better.

This is what I do with works of personal nature. I make them the best I can, and if - and only if - they are actually of marketable quality, I will actually ask money for them. You are exposing your work to the strangers, and that is always a very scary step in the publication process. I understand why you might get burned. But you can't blame the world for that failure - you need to make things better and better and better until you genuinely come to the point where you can say "this is the best damn thing ever and only lunatics can complain about this". If you let the critique get to you too much, it turns into festering bitterness. Look into the mirror and tell me if that is the case.

 

[Holdek]

I would love to see some of you locked up.

Nah, we'll be fine.

The three things all LOLcows have in common are:

1. They are crazy

2. They are amusing

3. They keep acting crazy and amusing

So, you really do need to see a mental health professional to help you get out of your "emotional prison." There's only so many ways I can give that advice. It's up to you to take it or not. You've maxed out our ability to help you.

Good luck to you.

 

[The I Scream Man]

Hardly. It's an old joke that's been making the rounds for 20 years. I just updated it with Barry-Boy's name. That's the beauty of liberalism-- same old stale, tired tricks, just change a name here and there.

I always hear about people in worse situations than me but suddenly get the Ghost or whatever and totally turn their lives around in a year, yay!...but tell me, how long does it last before they fall off the wagon and end up back before a judge? Another year? Six months? Two? One? I take about five years between every 9-to-5 gig to get my head straight, and it still doesn't work out. Sure, if it's a choice between straightening up and getting a job or rotting in prison for five to 10, I can see it... but I've been in an emotional prison for twice as long. There's no hope of parole for me.


I've noticed I textwall a lot more when writing off the cuff or doing last-minute rewrites to a storyboard. I'm trying to have my thoughts better organized before I begin pencilling. I bought some notebooks and wrote most of seasons eight and nine longhand, and it's really working. The pages look much better now.

But in all honesty, I could do a whole comic with no speech bubbles (and have), and these pinheads would still find something to bitch about, because they are sad, broken little people who cannot look outside their narrow little definition of "normal" to embrace new ideas.


Yeah, that's all on you, buddy. Again--up to the same old stale, tired tricks for fifteen, 20 years. There comes a point where you cross a line between silly fratboy pranks ("Hey, duhh--let's break that crazy kid down the hall's door lock by jamming a roll'a pennies in it, hurr hurr hurr") and full-blown, prosecutable crimes (attempted murder, sexual solicitation). There is something deeply, stupidly wrong with you people, and I would love to see some of you locked up.

If you asked your mom if she thought you loved her, what do you think she'd say?

 

[The_Iconoclast]

[W]hy did you go through the length of going through the publisher? Why is it out there? What's the big darn principle behind charging 1€ for it?

Well, I need the money, why else? I've given away most of my short stories free to online magazines or my website. I discovered Amazon Kindle about four years too late. I thought, hey, I can put something from my slush pile out there and gin up some fast royalties while I finish my next novel (which has been five years, three rewrites, and a computer crash in the making, and I'm still not quite happy with it). I'm not even sure how much it's made, or where those few cents in royalties go now that I've closed my bank account (electronic payments, my butt--I like a paper check I can hold, maybe show off to folks a little, something I endorse with my name. I have a special check-signing pen and everything!).

I don't know where you got the idea that I'd make the protagonist "smash down the wall and run around the city like a great, buffoonish invisible Godzilla".

It was when you said the protagonist decided to just "sit there" and be "bored". In actuality, he was petrified with fear. You seemed to want him to get up and do something, but in my dream that's all he did--sit and ruminate and fight to keep his head together. Metaphor for my life? Maybe. Rainbow-headed girl, symbolic? Could be. Rainbows symbolize promises. Maybe I am a giant invisible man waiting for a promise to be fulfilled. Still don't understand why Brendan Frasier.

 

[WWWWolf]

Women's suffrage? Okay, fine. But now it's all about angry "grrl" feminism and the "slut revolution" of the nineties that my generation is still reaping the sour fruit of.

Ooh! Ooh! As someone with quite a lot of interest in modern feminism, I have seen this argument so many times.
I have to ask you this question:
Do you also describe your view on immigration policy as "those lazy-ass damn immigrants never even work, they're just taking all unemployment benefits!" followed three sentences later by "we should do something about those damn immigrants, they're taking all of our jobs! This country is fucking ruined because of them!"

Before you answer, I want to make one thing perfectly clear: I'm not trying to make an assumption about your political leanings here, or ask this just to set up a painfully obvious strawman argument. That would be clearly stupid. I'm asking this for an entirely different reason that relates to the quoted comment of yours, but pointing out the exact reason would defeat the purpose of the exercise. Many observers here can probably see where this is going. (And no, this is not a forum in-joke either. It is, however, related to a piece of rhetoric that the folks in the feminist group I follow find endlessly amusing.)

Well, I need the money, why else?

But you're taking a gamble when you risk alienating your readers, all for little to no income. You're concerned about your artistic integrity, yet you also take needless risks when you absolutely insist on the income.

A lot of bigger names in the industry realise that you can't put a price tag on everything you produce. Just look at the authors who allow fan fiction. Legally speaking, they could crush the fanfic authors, but they realise that doing that to their fanbase would be a stupid PR move and they'd lose their support.

It was when you said the protagonist decided to just "sit there" and be "bored". In actuality, he was petrified with fear.

Being paralysed with fear is a valid plot choice. It's just ludicruous to assume that if I point out that the protagonist is sitting around, I demand flashy action that takes the story completely elsewhere. As a reader, I demand that the plot goes forward. As a writer, I understand that that can be accomplished by many ways. I don't mind charaters being stuck with fear, I just demand that the story makes it an interesting, meaninful experience for the reader. Show, don't tell, especially don't dawdle around.

 

[The_Iconoclast]

No, I' worried about Ahab the Arab sneaking over the border with a dirty bomb strapped on his camel named Clyde, looking to kill untold thousands...or an Ebola patient who could infect those same untold thousands with a terrible, difficult-to-cure disease.

If you asked your mom if she thought you loved her, what do you think she'd say?

I say only an ugly, sick, broken mind would even ask such a thing. I've helped her through two failed businesses and a heart attack scare. I turn over most of my royalty checks and can money to her to help out (not welfare, despite what Johnny Tit-Knocker thinks). I've sacrificed a lot and ask hardly anything. And it's partly for her that I want to find my old business partner and ruin him. She was dating the guy, even loaned him the money to rent his shop. She was sick and depressed for weeks after he skipped town, and that's when my brother rose to power. I was too busy cleaning up Dale's mess, dealing with angry, jilted customers, and liquidating the shop assets to pay much attention to him--my mistake. She's a simple woman, and I don't always think she knows what she's doing...but to say I don't love my mom--in all honesty, if you were right here in front of me, I'd probably beat and strangle you.

 

[Randall Fragg]

No, I' worried about Ahab the Arab sneaking over the border with a dirty bomb strapped on his camel named Clyde, looking to kill untold thousands...or an Ebola patient who could infect those same untold thousands with a terrible, difficult-to-cure disease.

So, you're anti-terrorism. Good, that's a position we can agree on. So, would you support aggressive development of renewable resources (with an emphasis on nuclear and development of alternate ways of producing plastic) as a way to eliminate our use of oil from Saudi Arabia, a despotic nation with links to terrorism?
Also, what's your opinions on some of the major political issues of the day?

 

[WWWWolf]

No, I' worried about Ahab the Arab sneaking over the border with a dirty bomb strapped on his camel named Clyde, looking to kill untold thousands...or an Ebola patient who could infect those same untold thousands with a terrible, difficult-to-cure disease.

Innnnteresting.
*at this point, the camera pulls back, revealing the Conspiracy Theory Bingo Card. The "our enemies are the least effective yet somehow the most powerful movement" square got ticked the previous turn, this turn it's the time for "racial stereotyping", "nutty theories of implausible methods of attack" and "natural disasters blamed on terrorism" squares all at once. Oh, and the "crank magnetism" too for good measure.*
BINGO!
(...thought I'd go for the bingo analogy, because, you know, that was all the rage back when the Earth was cooling down)
Edit: Oooh, a dislike from you! Was it because I implied Earth was cooling down at some point in history? Sorry, it was just a figure of speech I recently found amusing, you understand.

 

[The I Scream Man]

No, I' worried about Ahab the Arab sneaking over the border with a dirty bomb strapped on his camel named Clyde, looking to kill untold thousands...or an Ebola patient who could infect those same untold thousands with a terrible, difficult-to-cure disease.


I say only an ugly, sick, broken mind would even ask such a thing. I've helped her through two failed businesses and a heart attack scare. I turn over most of my royalty checks and can money to her to help out (not welfare, despite what Johnny Tit-Knocker thinks). I've sacrificed a lot and ask hardly anything. And it's partly for her that I want to find my old business partner and ruin him. She was dating the guy, even loaned him the money to rent his shop. She was sick and depressed for weeks after he skipped town, and that's when my brother rose to power. I was too busy cleaning up Dale's mess, dealing with angry, jilted customers, and liquidating the shop assets to pay much attention to him--my mistake. She's a simple woman, and I don't always think she knows what she's doing...but to say I don't love my mom--in all honesty, if you were right here in front of me, I'd probably beat and strangle you.

You're dodging the question, Sweetie. Is it because I've struck a nerve? That seems to be the case, so lets explore this a little further, shall we?

You say here that you jump through all kinds of hoops for her and that you help her out in every way you possibly can. So why not go get a job and relieve the burden of dealing with your sorry ass? While I'm certain that your welf-I mean, royalty checks and can money are quite substantial, I still don't see how you can afford to give her any money at all Sweetness. I mean, doesn't your brother steal it all from you? Which is it?

I really think you may have some mommy issues in addition to the smorgasbord of insane stupid bullshit you also possess, because while my mom is stubborn and has differing opinions from my own on some things, at no point in time would I insult her by calling her simple or implying some sort of superiority over her. Obviously you just want something, anything to dominate and control, which is disgusting and you should be ashamed of yourself, if your ego and narcissism would allow it. And to say all these things and treat her with such disrespect while living in her house (because lets be honest, no one actually says "SHE LIVES WITH ME GUYS ")...if I was your dad I'd be ashamed of you.

One last thing: that Internet Tough Guy routine has been tried on by better than you, and it didn't fit them either. As multiple members of this forum can attest, I'm almost 7 feet tall and a hair under 400 pounds. I invite you to try, shrimpy.

 

[The_Iconoclast]

So, would you support aggressive development of renewable resources ...as a way to eliminate our use of oil from Saudi Arabia, a despotic nation with links to terrorism?
Also, what's your opinions on some of the major political issues of the day?

In short--yes. Recycle. Drill, baby, drill. For domestic oil. Against ethanol (drives up corn prices). Do not see solar as a viable option (Solyndra is a fiasco). You can't ban tag and sports with balls in schools and then cry that America's children are getting too fat. Let kids be kids. Gay marriage is a ploy. Gun control is hitting what you aim at. Why try to ban candy cigarettes and vaping are but push to have a pot shop on every corner? If you wanted a "real" black man in the White House, you shouldn't have railroaded Herman Cain. Probably much I've forgotten, but there's always the comic to express my views.

 

[Shokew]

In short--yes. Recycle. Drill, baby, drill. For domestic oil. Against ethanol (drives up corn prices). Do not see solar as a viable option (Solyndra is a fiasco). You can't ban tag and sports with balls in schools and then cry that America's children are getting too fat. Let kids be kids. Gay marriage is a ploy. Gun control is hitting what you aim at. Why try to ban candy cigarettes and vaping are but push to have a pot shop on every corner? If you wanted a "real" black man in the White House, you shouldn't have railroaded Herman Cain. Probably much I've forgotten, but there's always the comic to express my views.

The only things you're right about are recycling and improving our schools, as well as domestic oil, provided it drives prices down here like they are in a majority of South America (seriously, they pay less than a dollar a gallon for that shit...).

Other than that, you're a racist, sexist POS who needs to get outta here. This isn't good for you to be here with people who clearly can't help you nor don't want to...

 

[John Titor]

Why and how is gay marriage a ploy?