The Cole Smithey Thread

[HarryHowler]

It's amazing how often crazy things happen to people who desperately want attention or need to feel interesting. Not saying it didn't happen. Necessarily...

Cole's always struck me as something of a drama queen, but I think infecting himself with flesh-eating bacteria would be a stretch even for him. And the guy who wrote that article apparently witnessed this first-hand.

Maybe this is how Cole's managed to make a living for himself in Manhattan despite his film critic "fame" extending to a few small-town newspapers and the two dozen or so people who watch his stuff on YouTube; if he won a big settlement from a malpractice lawsuit, and made some judicious investments with the money he got, it could have provided him with enough financial security to live out his fantasies of being the next Ebert/Maltin/Armond White.

 

[Stud2Stud]

Cole Smithey nearly died from an infection of flesh-eating bacteria, according to this recent (but undated) anecdote in a column by Ted Rall.

Is it just me or is this Class A Attentionwhoring right there? I mean it's not like Cole wrote the piece himself, but it's still weird. Seeing how Cole is a pretentious douchebag, I wouldn't be surprised if his friends are just equally self-centred clowns. I especially like the name-dropping of a completely unrelated Hospital, just to point out Andy Warhol died there.
You know, on my way home from work, I passed a chinese restaurant and, as asia-enthusiasts will realize, China is famous for its violation of human rights.

Spoiler

I realize it somewhat ties in with the 'medical neglect' thing, but damn, it just seems like such an out-of-place remark...

 

[Henry Bemis]

"...where, New Yorkers remember, Andy Warhol died..."

Yes, because every last New York City resident is hip and jiggy with it unlike those stupid suburban bumpkins DO YA HEAR ME, MAMA.

 

[Dr.Research]

With all this coming out about how is a bit more like Barb and Chris that we may have originally thought, kinda makes you wonder what he's like as a husband and how he acts with his wife.

 

[Holdek]

With all this coming out about how is a bit more like Barb and Chris that we may have originally thought, kinda makes you wonder what he's like as a husband and how he acts with his wife.

He probably doesn't make waves, considering she's his .

 

[BALLZ-BROKEN]

“My finger is bothering me,” Cole whispered to me during a screening. After the lights came up, he showed me an index finger that had expanded to nearly double its normal width."

"I finally pulled it out of my ass, Ted, and now look at it!"

 

[Mrs Paul]

And a million Yinzers just vomited. Seriously, do not compare that pretentious douchebag to Andy Warhol, Rall. Get bent.

 

[poddlespot]

So I skimmed this thread and was like... "Yo, what does this sugar mama of Coledaddy's do for a living?" Her name's Katherine, right?

Being Coledaddy's sugar momma ain't cheap. Not only is the dude not earning money, he's spending it too- On video cameras, editing software, maintenance for his instruments and whatnot, and like food and craft beer and associated bullshit.

So I googled "Katherine Cole Smithey" and found that one Katherine Kyle liked a number of his facebook posts: https://www.facebook.com/katherinekyle Looks like that's him in the photos wit her. A twitter profile for Katherine Kyle also follows Cole, as well as a bunch of pretentious craft beers: https://twitter.com/katherinekyle

http://www.howcast.com/videos/515493-Craft-Beer-Expert-Katherine-Kyle-Craft-Beer <- Turns out this is her. She's the general manager for a hipster bar in Manhattan, and from the looks of it has been since the bar's inception in 1994.

What is the point of uncovering all of this info? None, really. I just got bored and decided to play internet detective. But I can't stop laughing at the idea that you apparently have to open your own successful business in Manhattan and operate it successfully for 20 years before you have enough disposable income to raise and support your very own Coleslaw, and help him follow his dreams.

 

[Holdek]

http://www.howcast.com/videos/515493-Craft-Beer-Expert-Katherine-Kyle-Craft-Beer <- Turns out this is her. She's the general manager for a hipster bar in Manhattan, and from the looks of it has been since the bar's inception in 1994.

She's been there since 2000, according to that page.

Does anyone know if this is the bar Cole takes you to if you win the eBay auction with him? If so, it would appear that an instinct for grifting is one thing that he should be thankful to Barb for.

And a million Yinzers just vomited. Seriously, do not compare that pretentious douchebag to Andy Warhol, Rall. Get bent.

It's funny that these two are friends, considering both of them have reputations for being unlikable d-bags.

 

[Christ-Chan]

@Dad you owe us all to go! I'll pay for the first brew for a review!

 

[BALLZ-BROKEN]

View attachment 8125

I wonder if they have Milwaukee's Best on tap?

 

[Tragi-Chan]

So Cole is married to a woman who is happy to support his passion and who owns a bar. I kind of feel like I can't really mock him any more.

 

[P-Logic]

So Cole is married to a woman who is happy to support his passion and who owns a bar. I kind of feel like I can't really mock him any more.

Cole and his wife seem like pretty good people. I never understood why people here mock him in the first place. I always figured it was jealousy to be honest. Not that Cole is a high achiever, but he has a pretty good lifestyle, living in a good place and spending his time doing stuff he enjoys, whereas probably a lot of the people here who mock him live in the middle of nowhere and work jobs that they don't enjoy. There's also the whole "Mainstream Hollywood movies and Budweiser are plenty good enough for me, how dare he think they aren't good enough for him. How pretentious!" thing going on. I guess people in the fly-over states just hate people in NYC and California, and they hate people who have dragged themselves up from a shitty background in the fly-over states even more. How dare they?

 

[HarryHowler]

Cole and his wife seem like pretty good people. I never understood why people here mock him in the first place. I always figured it was jealousy to be honest.

Mmm... nope.

I will say that more than a few people seem to have fallen into the trap of assuming that because Cole isn't the hot shot film critic that many originally thought he was, then obviously he's just Chris in a smarter suit. The fact is, we don't know enough about him to make any solid assumptions about the kind of person he is. But regardless of that, his articles and film reviews depict a man with a (seemingly) unwarranted level of arrogance and self-importance. Hell, just the fact that he calls himself The Smartest Film Critic in the World is gonna rub a ton of people up the wrong way!

 

[Tragi-Chan]

Cole and his wife seem like pretty good people. I never understood why people here mock him in the first place. I always figured it was jealousy to be honest. Not that Cole is a high achiever, but he has a pretty good lifestyle, living in a good place and spending his time doing stuff he enjoys, whereas probably a lot of the people here who mock him live in the middle of nowhere and work jobs that they don't enjoy. There's also the whole "Mainstream Hollywood movies and Budweiser are plenty good enough for me, how dare he think they aren't good enough for him. How pretentious!" thing going on. I guess people in the fly-over states just hate people in NYC and California, and they hate people who have dragged themselves up from a shitty background in the fly-over states even more. How dare they?

I don't know, I live in London, so I'm hardly a flyover states kind of person. I'm not one of those people who hates Cole, but I do think he's pretentious. The claim that people think he's pretentious because he doesn't like Hollywood movies doesn't hold up - if you read his reviews, he gives positive reviews to a lot of mainstream Hollywood films, but the reviews are invariably full of pseudo-intellectual tosh that tells you nothing about the movie itself. The way he acts and the way he addresses his readers makes him come across like he thinks he's hot shit. Even that wouldn't be such a problem if he genuinely was hot shit, but he isn't. He's a minor critic at best.

 

[P-Logic]

But regardless of that, his articles and film reviews depict a man with a (seemingly) unwarranted level of arrogance and self-importance. Hell, just the fact that he calls himself The Smartest Film Critic in the World is gonna rub a ton of people up the wrong way!

One man's arrogance and self-importance is another man's confidence. I am sure there are people here who think he's arrogant and self-important just because he dares to try and be a film critic even though he's "just" a dude from a white-trash family, especially since he's often such a contrarian. He's best known for giving negative reviews to universally loved movies, and I am sure that rubs people up the wrong way, but contrarianism in journalism is a well-worn road, and it's important to have iconoclasts in culture.

It should be clear to anyone with a sense of irony that the "Smartest Film Critic in the World" thing is tongue-in-cheek.

 

[drmccoy]

One man's arrogance and self-importance is another man's confidence. I am sure there are people here who think he's arrogant and self-important just because he dares to try and be a film critic even though he's "just" a dude from a white-trash family, especially since he's often such a contrarian. He's best known for giving negative reviews to universally loved movies, and I am sure that rubs people up the wrong way, but contrarianism in journalism is a well-worn road, and it's important to have iconoclasts in culture.

It should be clear to anyone with a sense of irony that the "Smartest Film Critic in the World" thing is tongue-in-cheek.

Yeah, I agree with you here. He's doing alright for himself it seems. Is he a shitty movie critic? Aren't they all? He did the smart thing and severed.

 

[Panzer IV]

Cole and his wife seem like pretty good people. I never understood why people here mock him in the first place. I always figured it was jealousy to be honest. Not that Cole is a high achiever, but he has a pretty good lifestyle, living in a good place and spending his time doing stuff he enjoys, whereas probably a lot of the people here who mock him live in the middle of nowhere and work jobs that they don't enjoy. There's also the whole "Mainstream Hollywood movies and Budweiser are plenty good enough for me, how dare he think they aren't good enough for him. How pretentious!" thing going on. I guess people in the fly-over states just hate people in NYC and California, and they hate people who have dragged themselves up from a shitty background in the fly-over states even more. How dare they?

What the...
Is that you, Cole?

 

[HarryHowler]

It should be clear to anyone with a sense of irony that the "Smartest Film Critic in the World" thing is tongue-in-cheek.

In isolation, maybe. It's just that when combined with the other stuff he's written along with the language he uses even on Twitter, it often seems like he genuinely does think he's the world's smartest film critic. Admittedly though, there are a great deal worse things a man can be than egocentric.

As for the "contrarian" thing, Cole actually does go with the general critical consensus 77% of the time; compare this to 52% for Armond White.

 

[Henry Bemis]

I guess people in the fly-over states just hate people in NYC and California, and they hate people who have dragged themselves up from a shitty background in the fly-over states even more. How dare they?

Because nothing worthwhile comes out of fly-over states...?