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🍔 QuarterpounderJeremy Hambly / The Quartering / MTGHeadquarters / Unsleeved Media / Midwestly - Buttblasted alcoholic manchild upset he was banned from a childrens' card game, Grifter, supporter of the cancel culture, cucked by a Jewish bull (Adam Sellers), pisses in basement, shits himself, FLAGGOT, stalks little girls in public, scammer, sex pest
If she shows up on Monday it's on sight with her from now on. How many chances do you need the get on a lifeboat and you're still running back on the sinking ship.
If there's one truly negative aspect of this thread, it's that you can reply to a post from yesterday and easily be 30 pages back. Replying to one from a few days ago? You might as well replying to something a decade ago, relative to this thread's distorted space-time continuum.
Yet, my deeply autistic need to reply to dozens of quotes so I can share paragraphs of my pointless thoughts that no one really gives a flying fuck about, compels me anyways. In retrospect, I should pick up a hip hobby like smoking cigaweetes. That's be cool.
First though, let me post the clip of Dank bringing up how hated Jer is. This was one of the later streams they did. Jer spins it as only being woke lefties who fixated on him pissing in his basement. Mind you I'm going to show you proof from his own comments section (now deleted) that this wasn't at all the case — that much of the obviously right wing TISM viewers either didn't respect him, disliked him, or had visceral contempt for him.
Another massive similarity to Ralph. In addition to being fat, an alcoholic, addicted to Xanax, overly emotional, think skinned, can't let things go, (and a million more TBH. Really, the only real differences are Jeremy isn't a literal midget, and he was a lot more successful.) they both have some sort of aura surrounding them. An aura that just causes them to irritate people, to an almost irrational degree, within seconds of learning about them.
The only real deviation being Ralph's aura predominantly causes people to want to cyberbully him, whereas Jeremy's aura just irritates the living fuck out of people. Both auras are similar and ultimately lead into the same direction, but they're kinda alternative approaches to go about it.
As someone who never read much on the Quartering as a lol cow, I only knew of him as that slob who reads new articles on Youtube about Magic the Gathering and had the reading ability of a grade schooler. That being said, what has been happening over the last couple of weeks has been very entertaining as a new comer..
I think that's what's baffling about him, for two reasons.
1. Obviously I'm speaking from my own perspective, but I rolled my eyes at his content when he started breaking out. Like, there wasn't even that phase of 'Oh, this guy makes some content I'm vaguely interested in, but I'm gonna stop watching him after a few months because he's kinda boring and doesn't say anything new.' Idk if it's because his content (and him) was just that shallow, or what.
The only real external factor I can think of is he kinda blew up around the time he got beat up at that one convention/event, I thought the person who beat him up was a tranny for some reason, and I immediately thought 'Oh wow, This guy's a fag'. Ofc, It eventually turned out/I learned that the dude who swung at him wasn't a tranny, and fairly justified, which makes everything worse.
2. I'll go with another similarity to Ralph with Jeremy's Corn Harvest. Jeremy has built up so much bad blood, over such a long period of time, and nothing ever really came of it. Well, until it did. Where Ralph's was founded upon the short-lived extreme that was Da Sektur, Jeremy's corn harvest accumulated over years of fairly mild-to-moderate shenanigans. So many of those shenanigans would teeter at the edge of blowing up, slowly fading away, but never really went away. You can attribute that to the combination of Jeremy being sleazy, disingenuous, and never ever letting things go.
This thread was only a few people posting for a very long time. It picked up some when Kino Casino started covering him last year. 99% of the people in this thread had forgotten he existed or didn't know about him at all. Jer crashed out so bad that 99% of the people here came here in the last two months, including me.
The brown light of PPP's sphincter is an ill omen for those it shines upon, much like how Null telling people "Hey, you might want to unfuck yourself because I've seen how this plays out a million times. FFS, Claude I run a message board specifically dedicated to observing people's downfall" is a harbinger of corn.
I wish we had an experienced psychologist capable of creating a psychological profile of this man, cause I have no idea how he became a multi-millionaire with such a defective brain
I want this to since it's not even like Jeremy is making subtle mistakes. Sure, he thinks he's some Machiavellian schemer, but the retarded shit he does is like "My nigga. Can you control yourself for like 5 fucking seconds? I get self-inflicted problems, but there's no plausible, positive value for 100% of the shit you're doing."
God bless, I should build a lolcow PR business of sorts to help guide these retards through their meltdowns. Ofc, they wouldn't listen since that's what makes them a lolcow, but there'd be so much value in them having some contact to ask "Should I do this?" during crisis.
What's great is the reply would almost always be "No, and here's exactly why doing that will backfire almost immediately" because non-retards (such as myself, ) know how this shit plays out. On the flip side, not only do these retards who aren't my clients (#marketing) not know how their shenanigans will play to the crowd, but they almost always lead to their other, often more embarrassing shenanigans, being discovered.
This is why I assume he's extra panicky right now. (Thank God for self-medicating through Xanax and booze, amirite fellas?) A sane human, who was in Jeremy's position, would have set aside a healthy chunk of money they made when they were raking it in as a 'Okay. Do not touch this whatsoever because I can live off this stack of cash in case I make $0 for the rest of my life' fund. There's no way he did that for a few reasons:
1) He's an immature sperg who not only can't control himself from consuming, must consume only the best of the best.
2) As baffling as it is, he thought money train would never stop. On one hand, I get it at a fundamental level. No one simply assumes there life is going to get worse, even when it's just as distinct a possibility of their life getting better. On the other, my nigga. You're a content creator (allegedly at least). I'm not sure if there's any career that balances lucrative and volatile in nearly the same way, and not just that. Pop culture is his God damn niche. WTF did he think the 'pop' stood for instead of popular? Popping pills? (Yes!)
When you're integrating yourself into 'pop culture' you're inherently tying yourself to a ship that'll inevitably sink. What I find particularly funny about Jeremy being a 'pop culture' guy is how obviously transparent and shallow it all is, in relation to him trying to embed himself within it. Which, ofc, is one of the reasons so many people find him intolerable in the first place.
3. Probably the most important, and kinda related to my first point. The retard has handcuffed himself to his soy consumerist vices so hard, that he's found himself in a Catch-22. Since he refuses to limit or restrict his soy-filled, short-lived dopamine rushed expenditures, he has to, has to, has to do everything he can to extract money out of his dying career.
However, he's already been doing that for years, irritating the living fuck out of people, and the backlash causes him to do something retarded. The problem for him is the backlash never went away and has now piled into an insurmountable mess (or Corn Harvest) that he has to, has to, has to surmount to continue those same soy-filled, short-lived dopamine infused passions.
My point being, the nigga has successfully found himself into a death spiral that's comparable to the likes of our beloved Ethan Oliver Ralph. All because he wants to have his cake, eat it too, flaunt it, and pretend the SJW's have attack his cake, all at the same time.
When are the prediction markets gonna push out a Rope Brand Rope prop, or even a 'Jeremy will do something stupid'? I'm highly curious what the market will make of the former, and I just assume the latter will have a laughably low payout.
He may be a workaholic, but all he does is shitty ragebait "news" and reading tweets. Of course he will never be fulfilled, there is no craft or valuable input. this is the perfect content to automate with AI, all you need to do is deepfake yourself and use AI to write scripts and maybe have some agents picking up the currently trending Twitter topics. You just need to check the script a little and make sure it is tailored to the braindead boomers who watch that crap.
What's weird is I'd argue it's more of a compulsion to him than being a "workaholic". I get that there's a certain level of joy in gaming the system, which worked quite well for him in the past, but it's accomplishing nothing for him at the point. If anything, it's intensifying his death spiral since it provides a plane of glass of sorts into seeing how desperate and panicked he is.
While making a very optimistic assumption here, I've got one. He's paid his federal taxes to the US, and I love those guys. I'm a huge fan of the government giving out free crack pipes, subsidized tranny surgeries, and things like that. Huge fan!
Yes, but why is this fat, alcoholic retard so different? Granted, they typically don't achieve quite the same level of success Jeremy did, but most don't go into this steep of a death spiral. Do they?
I'm a huge fan of inordinate expenses of failing operations because lack of editors are certainly the problem for his empire. I'm sure throwing money at issues, instead of resolving the root cause of the problem(s), will work out because it always does. Right????
I don't really have an accurate baseline to hold this to since I don't typically watch Brittany Venti, but she seemed legitimately bothered and upset about all this. She's not fighting back tears necessarily, but you get the vibe she's shed a tear or two off stream over this. Assuming you can't solely attribute it to her being a woman, you gotta wonder if Chrissie Mayer is picking up on the deep betrayal Venti is feeling here?
The problem was never that she platformed Melonie Mac. It's that she spent several hours pretending like she had no idea what was going on and actively running damage control for Jer, when she could have turned it into a gossip segment where she asks Melonie about all the orange/weekend/flaggotry lore.
Referencing back to my new lolcow PR/crisis management business (LLC pending), this is another instance where it's so ridiculous easy to guide wee retards through shit. Since telling them 'STFU and get off the Internet' isn't an option, as it never is, you have to acknowledge drama like this at the very least. Now you don't necessarily have to talk about it, even though I believe delicately navigating that conversation is doable IMO. Now, I wouldn't ever have much faith in the capability of retards, but doable nonetheless.
However, pretending to be retarded and/or dumb has never ever ever worked out for anyone, simply because of how transparent it is. All you gotta do is say "Haha, yeah. I know, but I'm not gonna talk about it because I'm friends with these people." That's it and nothing more. Ofc, it's a lot more difficult to do that when the industry/niche you're a part of goes hand in hand with this type of drama, but it's still a hell of a lot better than doing whatever the fuck she did. (I'll reiterate my intent to set up a new Lolcow Crisis Management Firm, and I'll need help with names for the business as well as valuable employees!)
You've crossed the threshold for me, where I'm not sure if you're persistent, consistent dislike and trashcan stickers for certain funny topics is autism or serious. Similar to @The Last Stand and Hillary Clinton, or that one dude and our wife with Coke Rekieta. Regardless, it only makes me appreciate you at this point. Tee hee.
As bad as Mundane Matt was, at least his "bad headspace" led to him picking up boulders (and flagging down channels) instead of booze or Xanax. As far as we know at least.
As someone who watched every episode of TISM at the time when it aired, yes. Jer sucked. People came there for Dank and Bearing and the occasional guest. Jer was the ball and chain around the entire show.
1) Considering Ralph is either Ralph, Ralph 1, or Ralphaprime, and Matthew Vickers is Ralph 2 (TBH, I'm not sure what's worse. Being labeled a Ralph, or being labeled as Ralph 2 as someone who's older than Ralph 1.), is Jeremy now Ralph 3? Maybe we can get an Ralph: No Way Home movie where all the Ralphs of the Ralphaverse converge? Granted, they're already doing that to some extent, but I want some central plot thread where they're forced to confront each other's gaylogs in a desperate battle of acquiring Xanax.
2. Maybe Ralphaprime is angling for Jeremy to be his roommate in Tijuana when he was hollerin' about that a year or so ago? Ofc, Ralph 1 could have easily afforded it on his own if you wanna know da troof about it, but Ralph 3's finances are trending that direction. C'mon, Jeremy. Do it. Think of all the Xanax you can get!
The only real issue is Ralph 1's impending 'Mexican residence expiration saga', but I'm sure Ralph 3's income could be useful on that regard? Please, Jeremy. Hook a fella Xanny bro up!
If you don't care you don't have to comment. If you think this wasn't feature worthy, you can bring it up with the janny that featured it in TTS.
How long have you been at this for? Each time something sektur/grifter related gets featured, you complain about it. It's so easy to ignore it dude.
Can someone please explain why people like Jeremy always need to fucking write a God damn blog to explain why they're leaving Xitter? Just another use case for my future, highly lucrative and prestigious, Lolcow Crisis Management firm. Either make a short, honest post saying "I'm getting off Xitter because it's terrible for me", or just do it without saying anything.
I know why they do this shit. It's for garnering sympathy, trying to get a last word or explanation in, or anything along those lines. However, the blog post exist doesn't accomplish anything besides the poster getting butthurt from the replies going "Lol yeah right you retard" while they frantically check in on the replies with the hopes of everyone going "Oh, Jeremy. No! We're sorry, and we'll promise we won't make fun of you anymore of you come back!" Now why the fuck these retards think that'll ever be the case is beyond me, but it's exactly why they do it.
This is honestly one of his biggest fuck ups since the original flag. Now we can see he's not just morally bankrupt and craven, he will go out of his way to torch things OTHER PEOPLE make, and drag them into drama in the process
I'm not even fucking sure what that accomplishes when he's certainly frantically checking out all the replies and whatnot on another account. God bless. This retard somehow finds wrong decisions to make when no decision/action was necessary in the first place.
Something I hadn't thought of for now. The marriage caused her name to alliterate. My general rule of thumb is that name alliteration is a tier S+++ red flag. Damned if it's via birth or marriage. Doesn't matter. This explains everything.
I mean, if she loved him she'd have done this eons ago.
With that said, I'm going to control myself by not looking down. I did that several times already, seeing 5+ additional pages drop in between writing this post or taking a break to reply to text messages. It was my pleasure wasting at least an hour or so of my life replying to a bazillion quotes. The only thing I'll take from this is my burgeoning Lolcow Crisis Firm enterprise, of which will surely be successful. I promise I definitely won't run into the ground ( ). First step, LLC registration. Next step? Business cards! After that? The world is mine...
In order to understand the mysteries of Scarlett Charlotte, you must first understand that she is far too much of a chad schizophrenic to experience what you and I call "cognitive dissonance."
In the first quote, she explains that she is meeting up with degenerate sex freaks who paradoxically call themselves conservative. As conservatives, they oppose birth control, but as degenerate sex freaks, they want to cum inside Scar without getting Scar pregnant. Therefore, they "want vomit," as in hardcore oral sex.
In the second quote, Scar explains that she is a strong independent careerwoman and made the business decision to be gangbanged by ebony gentlemen on camera for money. She then frames her being told by the porn director which ebony phallus goes into which hole as her being a good conservative woman and accepting male leadership in the workplace. I also don't know if "MAGA hard" is a real slogan or if she has accidentally invented one for "conservative" sex freaks and their erect penises.
If she were a character in a novel, this scene would be described as a funny meta-narrative that satirizes the Horse-Faced-Podcast-Woman's grifting attempts at mingling Christian conservatism with the porn industry. Albeit a bit insensitive, as it plays into the stereotype that schizophrenics have some kind of seemingly-supernatural insight hidden within their ramblings.
You know, it just amazes me how lolcows like this lead to such collateral damage.
Chrissy Mayr, Melonie Mac ... Literally how did you two think that Hambly of all people was worth covering for? REALLY?
Obviously Melonie Mac is covering for him because he pays some of her bills, but seriously ... She's a relatively attractive alt girl who goes on other livestreams and podcasts. She could have easily found another YouTuber to mooch from, and now she can't because she's committed seppuku to her reputation.
And Chrissy Mayr covering up ... Literally makes no sense. There's no evidence she gets money from Hambly ... So she's just being stupid covering for friends of friends? Dumbass! lol.
Heather sits alone in the den while Jer drinks in his office.
She sits with a plain, unwritten Mother's Day card, imagining it being given by a child she will never have.
They probably have, but Jer, being Jer, probably sticks his feet in the sand and refuses to admit anything is wrong with how he lives his life. Because he lives one of pure delusion and denial.
) know how this shit plays out. On the flip side, not only do these retards who aren't my clients (#marketing) not know how their shenanigans will play to the crowd, but they almost always lead to their other, often more embarrassing shenanigans, being discovered.
). First step, LLC registration. Next step? Business cards! After that? The world is mine...
