🤝 Community Munchausen's by Internet (Malingerers, Munchies, Spoonies, etc) - Feigning Illnesses for Attention

[Pickled Cumquat]

Sorry for second post, finally worked though.

Nate is aiming for a multi-visceral transplant, and she is way too excited about it
First video doesn't have sound on her end, no idea why.

 

[Jimmy Dean Bowl]

Great news guys, Tilly got her 'decompression' surgery in Germany! I keep reading and re reading her explanation of what they're telling her they've done and I'm not sure if she doesn't understand or I don't or what, but...
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Mummy and Olly Oxford are both there.
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Her post op post is incredible, though. She sounds, idk, aroused or something by all this.
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I can't figure out what the fuck she's had done. If it was a reroute, what was the original obstruction? And is she claiming she's resistant to NMBAs/succinylcholine with the 'my muscles won't relax' thing? Can we get an anesthetist sperg if that's even physically possible? I know it's intentional but goddamn she's obtuse...

Thousands of words and zero actual info. Never change, Tillymuffin.

Tilly is a dreadful writer. That was a pain in the arse to read.
Resisitance to neuromuscular relaxant is possible, mostly due to upregulation of the acetylcholine receptors that the drug binds to.
This can occur in conditions such as myasthenia gravis (hi Vicky!). There are also genetic variations that cause a structural change to the receptors. Electrolyte imbalances like hypercalcaemia can also affect neuromuscular blockade by increasing levels of acetylcholine, thus competing with the drug at the receptors.
More relevant to Tilly, long term use of corticosteroids can dampen the responses of neuromuscular relaxants.
HOWEVER it is very easy for an anesthetist to tell if a patient doesn't have adequate blockade. A nerve stimulator is placed (usually on the wrist) and a small electric current is passed through to stimulate a peripheral nerve. Anaesthetists use the number of muscle twitches to gauge what depth of blockade is present, and redose accordingly.
Even if Tilly was resistant to one of the neuromuscular blockers the anaesthetist would pick it up immediately.
My theory: she was told she required a higher dose than normal and she invented a scenario where her head wouldn't move (erm, no. neuromuscular blockade doesn't stop the movement of body parts regardless of how tight muscles are. Otherwise how would the patient be able to put into position for surgery?). It's not fucking rigor mortis, it's muscle relaxation.
Stupid Tilly.

 

[glioblastoma multiforme]

My theory: she was told she required a higher dose than normal and she invented a scenario where her head wouldn't move (erm, no. neuromuscular blockade doesn't stop the movement of body parts regardless of how tight muscles are. Otherwise how would the patient be able to put into position for surgery?). It's not fucking rigor mortis, it's muscle relaxation.

In addition to this informative response I would like to add- we have seen pictures of her head in different positions. It moves just fine.

Re her "You have been in so much pain for so long that you have held your muscles so tightly..." beyond the above about how, in fact, an anesthetist will ensure they're relaxed:

Medics will manhandle the fuck out of you and at no point will they give a shit about causing you more pain if its required.

Spoiler: Slightly OT anecdote

Anecdotally, if you need surgery to repair a fragmented joint and arrive late in the day, you can opt to wait for surgery because the surgeon will have done loads of operations that day so is tired. If you choose a fresh surgeon (not guaranteed, multiple car crash victims requiring immediate life-saving surgery can come in directly after the anesthetist comes to say they'll be prepping youu shortly), they may need to move the fractured limb so that the cartilage won't be further damaged overnight, You can tell them that absolutely no way are they moving it, morphine might be barely touching the pain. and they'll just say "OK here's some gas" and do it. i After you've come round the surgeon will pop by and say 1 or 2 sentences regarding success and prognosis, then go off to do their next operation.

Maybe its a public surgery for actual problems vs private munchie-panderers but at no point have I ever heard about fawning about pain or tenseness. If you have something "interesting" then other people in the hospital might come over on breaks to look at the patient making their colleagues' day less mundane, like a zoo exhibit. But most surgeons have too many surgeries to sit around having deep conversations about what a brave warrior you are.

Also- isn't holding something manually for longer than you think you can fucking dangerous? She doesn't say what the tube was or where it was going but given its head related wouldn't moving it by accident if your muscles tired potentially cause serious damage? In this age of robotic surgery why the fuck are they doing this? I've never designed a robot but I'm pretty sure I could come up with a better solution than just holding it in 5 minutes.

I'm so confused by Tilly's story- it doesn't match what we've seen of her previously (head moving) or my own limited understanding of how surgery operates. I'm amazed people buy this bullshit, but we could all say that about all munchies.

 

[Jimmy Dean Bowl]

But most surgeons have too many surgeries to sit around having deep conversations about what a brave warrior you are.

So accurate. They don't hang around because they've got shit to do. Surgeons are notorious for having poor bedside manner because they cut, visit the patient afterwards and say "it was a successful surgery". That's it, no hand holding, no sperging about how brave and speshul the patient is. She's been watching too much Grey's Anatomy.

She doesn't say what the tube was or where it was going but given its head related wouldn't moving it by accident if your muscles tired potentially cause serious damage

Spoiler: Incorrect information

LMAO, the stupid bish is talking about the suction tube. Someone (usually the lowest man on the totem pole, sometimes a medical student) has to use suction to clear the surgical field of blood in order for the surgeon to see what they're doing. An essential part of surgery amd not unique to her by any means.
It sounds like she's had the munchie shiny prize of MALS surgery. This is where the surgeon releases the median arcuate ligament which compresses the celiac artery and surrounding nerve plexus, allowing maximal blood flow. MALS surgery is mostly done laparoscopically (keyhole) or robotic assisted. Open surgery of this kind is only really required if the blood vessel is damaged, very complex cases, or when the surgeon can't see shit (excess bleeding). If she had open surgery some poor bugger would have had to hold the retractors for a few hours. No-one is holding her head, the head isn't even involved in a MALS surgery.
It could have been decompression of a cervical disc, but given Tilly has always been on about her GI symptoms I believe it's far more likely to have been MALS, which isn't done often in the UK.

Edit: OK I've reread her posts and I'm wrong about the surgery type. I missed her talking about the jugular vein. She's a had a decompression of some vessel in the cervical spine. It's preferred nowadays for the surgeons to access the spine via the front of neck to avoid the spinal cord (anterior surgery). Her talking about cauterization of the vessels is completely normal, it's done in any surgery where there will be bleeding (ie. most). The surgeons so work through a tube to visualise the surgical field better and avoid damage to surrounding stuctures.

 

[Flourishing Pinecone ❧]

LMAO, the stupid bish is talking about the suction tube.

It might have been the camera if it was laparoscopic, still given to a junior to do but usually someone who at least knows what you're meant to be looking at so it can be aimed in the right spot.

I think the best part of her story was the Butcher Surgeon already giving her a bullshit reason as to why she hasn't woken up with instant relief. Oh you'll just have to be a bit more patient, Tilly! Just a few more months and it will get better. Oh it's not better? Gosh, I've just discovered why it's because you have [some new bullshit vascular difference of uncertain importance], we should schedule you for surgery right away.

 

[Tram Fan]

Ace: posts
Trammy: happy

An ambulatory wheelchair user is such an oxymoron, too disabled to walk, work or live her life independently, yet she'll be dammed if her room is nothing short of Pinterest-perfect. So how did she get those butterflies on the roof and walls?? Seems like she's pretty well independent with ADLs when she needs to be. That "decorated commode" genuinely is a fetish.

Slight disagree, in the cases on non munchies an ambulatory wheelchair user is a phrase that makes sense. For example I've seen an amputee instagramer, that has no legs and she sometimes uses her prosthetics or her wheelchair or nothing but her hands. Sometimes one mobility aid is more convenient than another, but of course it's also very convenient for munchies.

Look who commented on one of Hannah's recent tweets

As a person who unfortunately did time as a sickly hag Hannah is stupid imo, like you build your pain tolerance, so you don't really "play martyr". But elaborating further would be powerleveling kinda.

Admits that she'd rather overwork "good" doctors if it keeps "bigots and abusers" from murdering her for being disabled in hospital

Butttttttttt this is exactly how you create bigots and abusers. You overwork cool young interns to the point that they hate everything and everybody. Obligatory put the commie in a bag and then throw the bag into a lake. Additionally, I'm stealing some pics from you and putting them in the funny pictures thread.
I love how
unmasking is literally being a pedophile XDD

I'm going to also theorize that the child will likely require SpEd services if Ace is some flavor of neurodivergent, which includes its own challenges that Ace cannot possibly handle if they can't deal with Monday morning traffic.

Even if the child was born healthy which is unlikely due to her smoking, the neglect alone would cause significant developmental problems, the boy will be too autistic for kiwifarms even, yes this severe. I still remember that old story of a Polish speech therapist who said she'd get some children with speech deficits caused only by the parents who wouldn't talk enough to the children in proper Polish, And they weren't like totally neglecting their children, they'd just speak in cute weird voices. Now imagine Ace's neglect even if you optimistically discard smoking nearby a child. But you shouldn't so I expect asthma sperging in like 3-4 years. Obviously if the child makes it this far with Ace.

I want to see the non binary genderqueer munchie deported to a communist country so she can experience what she covets.
Something tells me it would be a learning experience for her.

Also, munchies claiming that smoking weed is essential medicine is vexing me.

Why do you think so? In North Korea Ace wouldn't have to worry about having a kitchen stained by food, because there'd be no food and she'd not waste her precious spoons cooking or cleaning, because her home would me like super small. And the local doctor would be probably uneducated and he'd let her smoke. And if police (or rather milice) would catch her with drugs, going prison would be chill, because she'd go with her entire family and not alone.
I'm thinking she'd enjoy this.

Her post op post is incredible, though. She sounds, idk, aroused or something by all this.

It reads like those retarded Wattpad fanfics. No I don't read Wattpad fanfics , but I've read a few once and then I got a literal PTSD and heart damage from that I quit Wattpad forever anyway. Next chapter will be this neurosurgeon fucking her and she'll have some doubts bc he has a wife and whatever cool romance story.

 

[Jimmy Dean Bowl]

Shitting is a deeply spiritually vulnerable sensory experience

The best random_txt ever

 

[toffle]

Claims to be a sensitive shitter, yet no mention of bidet. Child's play.

 

[It's Never Leprosy]

@Pickled Cumquat I thought her shirt said 'In my transplant era' in one of those shorts but couldn't tell for sure. Cheyanne arc incoming.

Did we ever find out if her settlement got clawed back? After the whole Maya thing?

 

[kudzu quiche]

Oh right, I had promised to share my notes from the Tilly podcast. She’s actually more tolerable to listen to than to read, but that’s not a very high bar. My notes weren’t great since this was background noise while doing other things. I don’t know how much of this information has already been shared before. And looking over my notes now, I do wish I had written down time stamps occasionally, but it is in chronological order.

Spoiler: Tilly’s podcast appearance

She opens with the usual backstory, how raw milk gave her tuberculosis, and having undiagnosed active TB for 13+ years was the catalyst (haha, cattle-ist) for her to develop everything. That, and underlying EDS, Somehow.

She’s been in the hospital a lot. Admitted for IV antibiotics over the years. London 2022 - worst hospital stay, she was a medical mystery.

Tilly’s mum deserves an honorary MD degree for how much she’s done for Tilly. She believes there is a reason for everything, and that knowledge is power. Always asking next question, pushing for tests/diagnoses. Her research led to a care plan and next steps. She knows how to “ask questions the right way” so that doctors listen.
So… Is this long term MBP?? Enabler mum? Gullible mum? Both of them just stupid???

Tilly was allegedly told as teenager she has EDS - 15 years ago. This might have been when she mentioned that her mum was also informally diagnosed, but that might have been later.

Tilly lost weight, and EDS means she's too stretchy so her organs moved, and toxicity built up in kidneys because the vessels were compressed ???

Instagram crowdsourced for a diagnosis - Mum did research on all of the suggestions! MALS seemed most accurate, found Dr Deutschland [CBA to remember both the doctors names so I have merged them into a single entity] from his published research papers. LIFE SAVING surgery!

Her compressions meant no kidney detox for YEARS - heavy metals, "toxins", virus and bacteria stuck inside her.

Spoiler: Not how that works

According to the Cleveland Clinic, kidney failure has the following symptoms:

• Feeling very tired (fatigue)
• Nausea
• Vomiting
• Confusion or trouble concentrating
• Swelling (edema), especially around your hands, ankles or face
• Peeing less than usual or not peeing at all
• Cramps or muscle spasms
• Dry or itchy skin
• Not being very hungry, or food may taste metallic

And the following complications:

• High blood pressure
• Low red blood cell levels (anemia)
• Bone disease
• Fluid around your lungs and/or legs
• Electrolyte imbalance, including high potassium and high blood acid levels

If her kidneys were not working properly for YEARS!!!, she would have had some sort of obvious and serious issues.

But okay, let’s be generous and assume that this is only one kidney. I’m using the Mayo Clinic page about acute kidney injury, which they say can be caused by “a condition that slows blood flow to your kidneys” or if “the kidneys' urine drainage tubes, called ureters, get blocked.” These are the symptoms:

• Less urine output.
• Fluid buildup, which can cause shortness of breath and swelling in the legs, ankles or feet.
• Tiredness.
• Confusion or fogginess.
• Nausea.
• Pain in the belly or in the side below the rib cage.
• Weakness.
• Irregular heartbeat.
• Itching.
• Loss of appetite.
• Chest pain or pressure.
• Seizures or coma in severe cases.

And potential complications:

• Fluid buildup. A buildup of fluid in your lungs can cause shortness of breath.
• Chest pain. The lining that covers your heart, called the pericardium, can get inflamed. This can cause chest pain.
• Muscle weakness. This can result from the body's fluids and minerals in the blood called electrolytes being out of balance.
• Permanent kidney damage.Sometimes, acute kidney injury causes lifelong loss of the use of the kidneys, called end-stage renal disease. People with end-stage renal disease need either lifelong treatments to remove waste from the body, called dialysis, or a kidney transplant to survive.
• Death. Acute kidney injury can cause the kidneys to stop working.

Again, not something she’d be surviving over YEARS!!1!1 and just plodding along. And if she had any real kidney damage or disease, surely the other hospitals in the UK would have noticed it. They would at least notice a lack of urine output. Hospitals love to track your input/output.

Patients from all over the world go to Dr Deutsh for surgery, which is a horrifying thought.
I wish they could do this for patients in locations who truly need specialist care that isn’t available in their country (thinking of Jas from the anorexics thread who is not getting the help she needs in Australia public healthcare), but of course it’s only pay to play surgery

Swollen TUMMY - "now can I possibly be fat?!" Called "fat" by doctors, yet she was skin and bone under the swelling. "Why would anyone choose this?"
Tilly obviously has body image issues if she thinks she was EVER considered fat, at most the doctors probably mentioned it when she’d gained weight. But then Tilly says when young girls lose weight, they’re unfairly labeled as having an eating disorder. It’s not really unfair if you have unexplained weight loss AND weight related body image issues.

People crawl into your bed in hospital?? She didn’t elaborate

“Social media opens conversations, and shares information across borders.” This can be good and bad - patients in rural or underserved areas without access to medical care might not know about certain conditions. And not necessarily just the “zebra disorders” or actual ultra-rare genetic disorders. Some people don’t know, for example, long term B12 deficiency can cause neurological symptoms. If that person doesn’t have access to a doctor, or has to wait months, or the one doctor in their small town just plain sucks, then they can try a B12 supplement and see if it helps.
And the bad side of this is… everything in this thread and more.

"All you can ask for in medicine is for doctors to never stop trying” - nice thought on the surface but not true for munchies

Tilly writing another book? Briefly alluded to

She was on 30 different meds before surgery

[This was about where I started losing interest and being less diligent with my note taking.]

All her diagnoses are really just symptoms of EDS + compressions… okay, which compression gave her tuberculosis??

Dr Deutsch mentioned a hypermobile patient after open abdominal surgery just casually sitting with her legs behind her head just because she liked to sit that way??!

Podcast host is a “colleague” of Dr Afrin the MCAS specialist. Just an interesting fun fact she threw in there.

Tilly’s mum was at some point also told she has EDS. Which brings up the question, “Why are younger generations more sick from EDS?” There is probably something to it for real EDS. This happens with some genetic disorders, for example a parent with level 1 autism having a child with severe level 3 autism. But for other cases, it probably is because of social media, and factitious disorder, and social contagion, and being so anxious about their health that they start actually feeling sick, and…

Tilly has a life coach certification now?! Just like Alexandra! Would love to see how they coach people.

Blood leaking into spinal cord, she screams in relief when told about this

Tilly is "wise beyond her years" according to host

First line of Tilly’s book, and the thing she wants to tell every doctor: Being ill is not a choice. Wonder how often she was told her problems are self inflicted or nonexistent?

She spoke at Global TB Summit 2025

"Patient life" is a guarantee - not sickness or disability, which everyone will experience at some point. But PATIENT LIFE. Having your whole LIFE be about being a patient and receiving medical care.

What the hell, let’s make it a double feature. Alexandra Elaine Adams, the UK’s first deafblind-doctor-to-be for real this time, has updated again. I cannot for the life of me figure out how to download a video on mobile, and I don’t want to listen to her talking for long enough to screen record, so screenshots of the caption will have to do for now. Someone else will surely upload the videos later on (please?).
Come to think of it, these videos with no transcript are not very accessible for the deafblind people who can’t read her edited-in captions with a voiceover program!


Alexandra is in Australia, again, but this time for her medical elective.


She could have been a good disability travel influencer if she wasn’t so hellbent on being a doctor. She could probably even get decent attention for it online.


Okay, it wasn’t JUST for her medical elective. It was also yet another bucket list trip to celebrate.


So at the end of the day she had to “decide” to suck it up and make things work with her placement in Dorset. How many weeks/months did that take her? She could have spent that time on problem solving, finding a place to live in Dorset, etc instead of crying and complaining to instagram.

 

[Tram Fan]

Claims to be a sensitive shitter, yet no mention of bidet. Child's play.

capitalism destroyed bidets, notice that in capitalistic countries bidets are rare. Coincidence? I think not.

Come to think of it, these videos with no transcript are not very accessible for the deafblind people who can’t read her edited-in captions with a voiceover program!

most standard munchie/disability influencer situation. Not the first time somebody isn't making the proper caption while allegedly being informed in the topic of accessibility.

She could have been a good disability travel influencer if she wasn’t so hellbent on being a doctor. She could probably even get decent attention for it online.

Deafness isn't a good influencing content imo though. I don't know any deaf inluencer who talks of deafness and has like a million followers. All deaf influencers I've heard of were very niche. And then she'd have to learn some stuff and remember she's not good at learning. Notice how she doesn't talk of the superiority of the tactile sign language. Or anything of that nature really. So yeah it's not worth it. Blindness is better for content creation but only if you have an interesting life.

Alexandra is in Australia, again, but this time for her medical elective.

Okay I get it Australia is culturally close to England, but still how the fuck is it easier to make it work in a foreign country rather than your own? Like I got some big problem in Poland so I just move to Czechia and I'm fine? I can't imagine that working out any good, even though I can go to Czechia whenever with 0 legal issues via car/bus/train.
Besides what accessibility does she need apart from the orientation training for the blind? She doesn't talk of tactile sign language as far as I'm concerned, she just has her hearing aids. So what does she think she needs? I'm thinking she just created this drama so that she had a reason to move to a cooler place.

 

[RNTard]

So at the end of the day she had to “decide” to suck it up and make things work with her placement in Dorset.

the worst part is i know as soon as she's done her 2 years she'll be one a one way trip to Australia to practise here



I love this, my disabilities are supper bad and i could literly die, but heres how i'm able to have so much fun without my disability preventing stopping me when its convenient.

Okay I get it Australia is culturally close to England, but still how the fuck is it easier to make it work in a foreign country rather than your own?

Australia simply pays more, is better staffed and loves nothing more then bending over backwards to make everything more accessible for mouth breathing retards, i hate it.

If theirs ever a first doctor with down syndrome, i guarantee you they'll have graduated from Monash university and work at the Alfred, and somehow done it faster then Alexandra.

 

[Reddit Refugee]

I was planning on subjecting myself to her awful horrible long videos when work is not beating me up as hard but I've watched some of her recent ones in dribs and drabs so this might end up being a multiple part post. They are hard to watch so please forgive me.

Alexandra is in Australia, again, but this time for her medical elective.

Spoiler: Elective video transcript

Let's talk about setback and failure and all the opportunities that can come from these. Hello, my name is Alexandra Adams and in just a few months time I will be graduating as the UK's first deafblind doctor. I've recently finished my medical elective out in Australia and I'm currently spending my last week in a place that has honestly been on the top of my bucket list for as long as I can remember and it just feels utterly surreal to be here in my dream destination and to enjoy the fruits of my labour and the rewards of what have been a really relentless 10 years to get to where I am so I'm really really incredibly grateful for being here but I'm also very conscious that I haven't actually shared my medical elective experience on here yet and I think on reflection I've realised that you know you can do as much meticulous planning for a placement and things can still not go to plan, things can still very much go wrong and that was very much the case for me and yeah it's been tough but I've also had some really good things that have come out of it as a result which I'm grateful for.

I was supposed to be doing two weeks in palliative medicine in Sydney followed by four weeks of emergency medicine on the Gold Coast with a really good friend and colleague of mine who also happens to be a disabled medic so a quadriplegic emergency medicine doctor so it's fair to say that the whole experience was you know going to be really exciting, really insightful, really educational so I was really looking forward to it but things kind of fell through the ceiling before and yeah didn't go to plan. The first sort of mishap in my placement chronicles was that unfortunately I couldn't do palliative medicine because the hospital was being renovated but that was totally fine because my next option was geriatrics which is also another specialty that I really can see myself doing in the future but unfortunately the supervisor that I was allocated perhaps didn't share the same understanding of you know my strengths, my abilities and also you know what I've had to do to get get here like everybody else and instead of introducing themselves and introducing me to you know the basement the first thing they said to me was should you really be doing medicine with those problems and that kind of really hit me in the stomach. I want to say that I was taken aback but I think in reality I wasn't. I've had this comment so many times through my medical school journey so in many ways it wasn't a surprise but I think the upsetting thing was was that I got this comment when I'm literally just a few months away from graduating, a few months away from starting work as a doctor, as a fellow team member and I guess also I was naive in thinking that resistance, ableism, stereotyping and whatnot perhaps didn't exist on the other side of the world in Australia but it's made me realise that actually discrimination, misunderstanding, misconceptions of disability is not a UK-based thing, it's not an NHS-based thing, it is very much worldwide, it's very much system-based and a universal issue and until we sort of advocate more and empower more and educate more things are going to be like that everywhere.

So yeah that was a bit of a downer but I think on the grand scheme of things it was only for a fortnight and the star of the show was this next placement which was on the Gold Coast working with a fellow disabled medic but unfortunately that didn't go to plan either and it's something that I haven't really shared yet but what I'll make very clear is that it has nothing to do with my supervisor, he was incredibly supportive of me and very empathetic with the bureaucracy that we were facing Ultimately, the amount of paperwork and admin I had to do months before was just ridiculous but one of those things was I had to have a mandatory mask fitting session and this was to basically fit a special mask in case of a circumstance where there was an outbreak, something like that and I explained very early on that I cannot fit these particular masks because I wear an oxygen cannula and a vials tube and therefore I would break the seal but you know there are plenty of people who wear medical devices on the face or who have facial hair that cannot remove that facial hair for maybe religious reasons, people who have all sorts of size shapes and sizes and shapes of faces which basically means that not everyone is going to fit these masks and there has to be a backup plan and in my case the backup plan was that if there was an outbreak or sort of something infectious diseases going around then I would simply not go into that area, I would remain in the green zones as I have done at home but also I can wear a respirator hood and this is essentially like a Stig-sized helmet and I actually resorted to coming out to Australia with this massive helmet lent to me by my local health board so I've been lugging that around to Australia with me but it meant that that was the solution, a very easy solution to a little problem but for whatever reason it wasn't enough and people higher up needed to talk more, I wasn't involved in any of these discussions so they had no information or explanation from my end and they deemed me not allowed to go on placement just because of this mask situation when actually nobody is wearing a mask at all in the ED at the moment which is just crazy and yeah also I have a relative working in that same hospital who has been there for two and a half months and has only last week been invited to their mask fitting session so they've gone and worked for two and a half months without even being asked to fit a mask so you know I can't help but think are there other reasons that I was rejected or sort of declined from going on this elective and it was all very last minute it was after I'd already arrived in Australia so kind of just put to complete waste the time, the energy, the money, the resources that I put into organising this so yeah it's been really disappointing I'm not going to lie really really hard but like I said you know good things have come out of these sort of devastating things as well which I'm you know all the same grateful for.

It meant I had more time to do a lot of advocacy stuff and I've ended up supporting students and staff who may have a disability or in some cases a visual impairment and have been able to help advise and advocate for them in how they can be better supported in the workplace. I met with the dean and the clinical skills team of a visually impaired medical student and was able to sit down go through all the competencies that they needed to meet for the medical degree and also all the solutions because we now know that it's very much possible and that it just requires a little bit of open-mindedness and innovation so yeah really exciting stuff. I've also worked with or networked with the Australian Medical Association, Vision Australia, the Australian Association for Ophthalmologists so yeah none of these things would have come up had none of this bad stuff happened so you know again I'm grateful and I guess the message is that you know it's not always it's not always bad it's not always negative but for the people who have been following me recently will know that I currently do have bigger battles to fight in the sense of me trying to find an accessible and realistic placement for my job in the summer and so I have to prioritise where I you know inject my mental energy and that is for now my priority.

On that note I'm feeling okay about things, I'm at peace with the situation, I think on reflection I've realised that actually over the many many years I've had so many other setbacks and hurdles and facing resistance and whatnot and somehow although not ideal I've always come up with a solution and a way of continuing forward so you know if this is going to be the case with the UKFPO which I think it is then I'm willing to work with it and find a solution whatever that might be. I don't know what's going to happen next but maybe that's all part of the adventure and the excitement but I'm okay I think I'm in a good place and maybe it's the island time the island life that's making me feel that way I don't know but yeah despite the negative stuff that's happened I'm in a good place and I'm so grateful to be where I am and I am just so excited to just now you know wind down and recharge and rejuvenate ahead of what's going to be without doubt a really exciting next chapter so I look forward to coming back soon with another myth busting video and continuing advocating and educating on how things are done as a disabled medic. Thank you so much for following as always and appreciate any questions or curiosities in the comments and I will be back soon after my little holiday.

I'm thinking she just created this drama so that she had a reason to move to a cooler place.

This might have been her plan had she not come to the realisation whilst in Australia that discrimination is not just by evil Welsh people but everyone everywhere all over the world. Especially Australia, who would never let her emigrate based on health costs. I somehow do think working as a doctor in Australia may or may not have been some idealised dream she had.

She went to Australia for 8 weeks to work something like 2 weeks in palliative care, 2 weeks in geriatrics and 4 weeks in ED. The palliative placement broke down because the hospital was being rebuilt so she switched to geriatrics who instantly did a major discrimination so she switched again to emergency medicine to work with her bestie Dinesh Palipana except apparently they banned her from working anywhere in the hospital because she can't fit an FFP3 mask over her tubes "in case of an outbreak." This is obviously horrible discrimination because everyone in ED is not wearing a mask right now and her relative who works there (likely u/picklebug on Reddit based on their weirdly defensive comments in the r/doctorsuk thread) wasn't mask fitted. Alexandra doesn't consider the hospital doesn't want to expose a student reporting multiple resp-related ICU admission to a horrible infection.

Overall she has spent six weeks doing "advocacy work" including meeting with a visually impaired student's medical school and a few other bits and pieces that amount to nothing you want in a future doctor. We may see interesting content published by Australian Medical Association, Vision Australia, the Australian Association for Ophthalmologists in the near future. She went to Australia to do two months of clinical work and did like two weeks if that lmao in my heart of hearts I wish Cardiff would make her repeat the year for this but I'm sure they're extremely keen to just wave her through and get rid of her.

Spoiler: Stethoscope video transcript

Myths and misconceptions on being a soon-to-be deafblind doctor.
Myth 12: You can't possibly use a stethoscope if you are deaf. Wrong. Come with me and I'll explain.

So I was born with severe to profound hearing loss and it requires me to wear hearing aids in both my ears. But because of my hearing loss it means that when I take my hearing aids out I cannot hear anything and so using a normal stethoscope would be of no use to me. Because of that I use something called a Littman Core Digital Stethoscope and this allows me to connect via Bluetooth wirelessly to my hearing aids and it allows me to hear patients' lungs and heart sounds without actually even having to take my hearing aids out. This allows the sound from the stethoscope to go directly to my hearing aids without having to remove them but it also allows me to be able to still hear what's going on around me. So for instance if my colleagues are talking to me or if the patient says something.

What's really cool about the stethoscope is that it comes with an app which you can download onto your smartphone and this is called the Echo app and it's able to give you a visual representation of what's going on when you're listening to the heart or lung sounds. Now as someone who's obviously registered blind this does come with limitations. However I do have some usable vision and so it allows me to still be able to identify the different shapes that are coming off from the different lung and heart tracings. Now this is where your clinical knowledge is really important because you need to be able to have pattern recognition and understand the different sort of shapes and types and sounds to then understand what's going on with the heart. So for instance if somebody had something called aortic stenosis which is a murmur as a result of narrowing in the aortic valve you would expect to hear a crescendo decrescendo murmur and on paper or on tracing this would look like a sort of a diamond shape. So when I'm using this app and I think that I might be hearing something like an aortic stenosis you would be able to identify these sort of diamond shaped patterns on the tracing.

Another example is something like mitral regurgitation. Now this is a pansystolic murmur and sounds a little bit like a "brrr, brrr, brrr" and so on. And again on paper on tracing you would expect this to just be sort of one sort of chunk going along the tracing. It doesn't change in sort of character or sort of level of sound there's no sort of crescendo decrescendo sort of characteristics to it. So again it's about being able to identify the shapes. Now being able to see the outline of things I am able to do this and along with my clinical knowledge I can develop this pattern recognition over time to help me diagnose different types of murmurs.

Another really useful function with this stethoscope is that I can select different settings for it so for instance if I'm listening to a patient's heart then I might want to select the cardiac function or the function but if I'm needing to listen to somebody's lungs so from their back then I would probably choose to change it to the pulmonary function because it's able to pick up lung sounds better than if I was listening to heart sounds and because I am using my phone and my hearing aids I can adjust the volume and make it as loud as I need it to be so that I'm able to hear.

So I'm going to try and demonstrate by using the stethoscope on me obviously I'm not going to be recording in a clinical environment for patient confidentiality reasons. So here I've got the stethoscope I don't need to put this end of the stethoscope into my ears because my stethoscope is already connected viably to my hearing aids. I then get the stethoscope and put it onto my chest so here I'm looking for the second intercostal space which you can find by feeling down the ribs and then what happens is that the stethoscope will pick up the heart tracing and if you leave it on the area for a few seconds it will then pick it up and it will start analysing the heart rhythm.

It will then go to automatically record however you can change the setting so that it doesn't do this if for whatever reason you don't need to or you don't want to and here we go so this is my it's also giving me the beats per minute on average and I can play back my heart rhythm and listen to it. What's also really cool is that I can simply disconnect the bluetooth function from my stethoscope so that everybody else in the room can hear the recording. So if for instance I wanted to use it for teaching purposes or if you know one of my doctor colleagues wanted to just double check that I was hearing the right thing or sometimes even if the patient wanted to hear their own heartbeat which is actually a really nice way of kind of breaking the ice and having a good conversation. And I can play this out loud so that everybody else can hear it so it doesn't just go straight to my hearing aids.

Now the app is able to also pick up murmurs so when you do do your recording you can see here that it has identified a murmur. It won't tell you what type of murmur it is. I do believe that there are extra programs that you can purchase that can potentially do this but as somebody who is a new resident doctor and not a consultant cardiologist this wouldn't really be relevant or applicable for me but what you can do is select where on the chest you found or heard this murmur and then that will help your diagnosis because you hear different murmurs in different areas of the chest on examination.

Now every medical school is different but my particular medical school did give out normal stethoscopes to every student when we first started our degree. Now obviously that meant that I did get another stethoscope which I couldn't use but I actually still use that every now and then especially when I'm in paediatrics because again it's just a nice way of being able to make the patient feel more comfortable, break the ice. So quite often I will give my normal stethoscope over to the little patients just so they can get a feel of what's going on and what I'm about to do and then I'll use my special Bluetooth stethoscope to then listen to their heart and lungs.

So I hope this myth-busting video has helped to explain how I use a stethoscope as a deaf-blind soon-to-be doctor. As always I'm really really grateful for all the comments and welcome any questions you have and I look forward to seeing you in the next myth-busting video. Thank you!

She was still in Australia when she posted this myth-debunking video on how she uses a stethoscope which is pretty boring but answers my question on why she cosplays with a normie stethoscope (freebie from Cardiff med school ). Weirdly she also debunks the myth that deafblind people with EDS, a ryles tube for drainage and channelopathies requiring oxygen can't do headstands. She also uh, dances? Wiggles her bum at the camera? You be the judge:

She continues to be vague about her vision remarking that she can see "shapes" and "outlines" and uses the term pattern-recognition to describe something that is more akin to how a nursery school teacher might use the term versus the way doctors use it. Otherwise I actually think this video is vaguely interesting and had she based her content more around non-sensationalist demonstrations she would be much more accepted by her so-called doctor colleagues. Still she manages to undo all this good work in the caption by finishing off with how much better it makes her than everyone else:


I'll come back for her travel videos and the job video and hopefully she will not post again before that because this is so painful. One of her travel videos was weirdly thirst trap style including filming herself showering for her story but no dialogue. I wasn't overly interested in her Cook Island videos so I'll leave those for the next post.

 

[glioblastoma multiforme]

Alexandra will have to "compromise her medical care somewhat."

She was at Cardiff university right? Which for those who don't know, is in Wales. Which is further by train from London, where her specialists are, and has its own NHS system. NHS Wales doctors I personally know demand to be treated in England because NHS Wales is so bad. If your mini-country's own doctors are demanding treatment over Offa's dyke so they can literally get back to treating their patients quicker then its fair to assume your healthcare system is shite.

By train Cardiff-London is roughly 2 hours, not including getting to to/from the station at either end. Dorset is making little difference to her life if she's sayingi it'll be a 2.5 hour journey- but she should just live there and see her specialists when needed, not spend the £1000s commuting back and forth. I did not look up driving times because I have enough faith in the DVLA to not let her drive.

Aus to London is 24 hours at least but she didn't complain about being away from her specialists then. Cook Islands? Fuck knows. Weird how its only a problem when she isn't getting her first choice location.

Also Dorset is fucking lovely, and I get the impression she's from a sufficiently well-off family to help her live in a nice place whle there. The whole south coast is boomer retiree/second home owner central ,so off limits price-wise to most people. I know many hospitals offer accommodation to students but I doubt it meets the standards of someone who can go on jaunts to Pacific Islands with no discernible income. Price thing also applies to London though they do have "key worker" housing there that is much discounted and quite nice but hard to get. Even the fucking Met can't afford to live in London.

TL;DR her travel time isn't that much different to while she was at uni. If she can go on long trips to the other side of the world she can live just fine in Dorset.

 

[Systems All The Way Down]

Meet Aster!​

Current TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@how.we.navigate
Current Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/thelastwhimzy

Aster is a 29 year old mixed race woman and self-proclaimed disability rights activist with a massive list of diagnoses. She spends almost all her waking hours on Tumblr, making TikToks, suicide-baiting, reading fanfiction, and going to doctor's appointments. She’s never had a full-time job, and she supports herself by e-begging and leeching off others. She's on medicaid and relies on "mutual aid" to pay for food (often doordash), housing (airbnb's and hotels), and other necesseties (that she replaces every year or so, due to bedbug issues, evictions, and other dysfunction).

A non-comprehensive list of claimed diagnoses and symptoms:

Spoiler

autism, DID, NPD, schizoaffective disorder, OSDD, BPD, bipolar, depression, PTSD, OCD, cPTSD, POTS, dystonia, dyspraxia, dissociative amnesia, dysphagia, dyscalcula, ADHD, dissossiation, arthritis, neurogenic bladder, spinal cord instability, craniocervical instability, HEDS, MCAS, Sleep apnea, infantile encephalitis, traumatic brain injury, post-exertional malaise, trigeminal neuralgia, prediabetes, nerve damage from wisdom tooth extraction, lactose intolerance, neuropathy

A non-comprehensive list of implied or suspected diagnoses and symptoms:

Spoiler

stockholm syndrome, tourettes, hEDS, dysautonomia, epilepsy, cptsd, anemia, unspecified tic disorder, tourettes, tachycardia, mcas, insulin resistance, arthritis, osteoarthritis, hypothyroidism, unspecified intersex disorder, nonverbal learning disorder, auditory processing disorder, severe obstructive sleep apnea, PCOS, chronic pain, chronic fatigue syndrome, craniocervical instability, hashimotos disease, PMDD, hypersomnia, amblyopia (lazy eye), insomnia, asthma, chronic fungal infections, no object permenance (???), raynaud's, psychosis, hallucinations, genetic mosaicism, mosaic down syndrome, dermatillomania, hypermelanosisofito, psoriasis, genetic thrombocytopenia, shaken baby syndrome

Aster, birthname “Star,” is a transmisogyny-exempt bigender man. She uses he/hymn, ae, and fae pronouns. She identifies as a polyfragmented, traumagenic system. Her altars include knockoffs of Wednesday Addams and Moon Knight.

FARMERS, DO NOT INTERACT WITH THIS POST IF:
- You are a zionist, a transmisogyny denialist, a transandrophobia truther, a pro-shipper, or an anti-anti
- You think fiction =/= reality
- You don’t disclose your race in your profile
- You think it’s OK for a DID system to have alters that identify as a race that's darker-skinned than the host body's race (lighter-skinned races ok)



---------------------

Here’s two fairly recent summaries Aster has made of her medical journey.

Spoiler: ”Images”

December 10th, 2024:


March 30th, 2026:

Spoiler: ”Transcript for easier reading”

Post from December 10th, 2024

I started iv saline therapy to help manage my dysautonomia in september 2022. the nurse was supposed to come weekly to change my peripheral iv but my veins kept blowing within a day or two because of my heds. I ended with four superficial blood clots in two weeks. That scared me, so I stopped iv infusion until I could get a central line to continue. It turned out that the estrogen birth control to help with my pcos was a major contributor. My labs were also borderline for antiphosopholipid syndrome. I stopped the birth control but didn’t know about the borderline aps in my labs until earlier this year (summer 2024)

one day, the area where my port was developed a small blister. it kept growing and I was concerned but at this point I mentally couldn’t handle more er visits. Eventually though, the blister popped. It took about a week to realize, but I showed my nurse pictures, and she realized that she could see the surface of the port underneath my skin and immediately sent me to the er.

I had already been in the er once that week for severe left blank pain that I was worried could be a rupture due to my heds. They gave me a painkiller for the flank pain and claimed that it was a puled muscle. I eventually found out that I might have something called nutcracker syndrome and it was strangling the blood supply to my left kidney but they complete ignore the ct scan because it takes a specialist to recognize it. Meanwhile my port was gaping open, though bandaged, but I didn’t tell them at the er because I couldn’t deal with more gaslighting.

When my nurse realized that my port was compromised, she immediately sent me back to the er where it was placed. They were very concerned and ended up admitting me, which was a huge surprise after being ignored for 4 months. This was the first time I had ever been given iv antibiotics and my first admission ever. they pulled the line and eventually placed a picc line. I was there for 9 days.

While I was admitted, I experienced a fair amount of neglect. I had a mcas episode at one point that they refused to help with. I ended up getting a really bad migraine for a bit, which was weird because severe migraines are very rare for me around this time, though, i was finding it harder and harder to urinate.

My struggles with urination had been going on for awhile and a close friend had mentioned I may be in retention, but the port situation was my priority at the time. While admitted, though, I ended up becoming completely unable to empty my bladder. I had to be straight cathed 4 times before they placed a foley catheter. At one point, they let me wait 9 hours before cathing me. It was super painful, and, when they finally did it, I had nearly a liter of urine in my bladder.

A few months after being discharged from the hospital, I ended up having a urodynamics study that showed hypotonic bladder. Ironically, I found out about the neurogenic bladder through the portal. The urologist told me that I had been in chronic retention for so long that my bladder was stretched and couldn’t contract properly. He wanted me to learn to self cath, insisted on it in fact, but this was extremely dangerous for me for several reasons. I ended up finding a new neurologist who specialized in neurogenic bladder and got a suprapubic catheter placed.

When I had my foley, I started getting a lot of utis. This was only worsened when my spc was placed. It was very painful and I had horrible bladder spasms. After they switched my spc from silicone to latex, though, the pain improved somewhat. This is what made me realize my mcas is reactive to silicone.

I ended up losing my housing in dec 2023. I still had my picc and it was difficult to access consistent dressing changes. The infusion company wasn’t very understanding so I ended up getting my picc line pulled and a new, non-silicone port placed in hopes of being able to care for it myself. I took a break from home fluids for a bit while staying at a dv shelter, instead going to an infusion center.

Unfortunately, due to my lax connective tissue, even infusion nurses and liens teams at hospitals struggled to access my port. They still struggle to this day. I've had 3 instances where it took 6 tries to access my port properly, which left me feeling a bit traumatized. I am always wary of new people accessing my port these days purely because of how difficult it is to access.

Meanwhile, I was still getting constant utis that were often antibiotic resistant. I ended up getting admitted in june for iv antibiotics. Eventually I stared at home iv antibiotics, which was a huge relief. Unfortunately, though, my mcas is reactive to 4 different antibiotics classes, so I had to start taking steroids and an extra antihistamine before running my abx.

I have been on iv abx for my chronic uti/kidney infection 6 times since june – it’s kind of a pain! Luckily, was able to get a consult for a urosotomy. I will be having an ileal conduit urostomy in april of 2025. I am currently scrambling to get several health issues deal with before the surgery. Last month (nov 2024), I finally saw a doctor to ask about nutcracker. My pcp was convinced that the pain was musculoskeletal but I have had chronic rib subluxations for years and knew that this pain was different.

The doctor I saw last month, an interventional radiologist, diagnosed me with severe nutcrakcer, may thurner, and pelvic congestion syndrome. He also said that the vascular compressions definitely contributed to the utis and bladder paralysis. It turns out that the flank pain I had in july 2023 was actually my undiagnosed ncs.

I am currently looking to see a vascular surgeon for a second opinion about surgical options since ir can only place stents. I need to get this dealt with before my urosotomy because, once my bladder is removed and stents are placed, no one is going to want to touch my kidney.

The past two years have been traumatizing and rife with medical gaslighting. Through it all, ive learned to become a practiced self advocate, which is something I am proud of.

Still, though, I can’t help but feel frustration at being neglected for so long. I am privileged to be very informed about my conditions and able to advocate for myself, but there are so many people out there who aren’t. It’s terrifying to think about how many people must fall through the cracks. The medical system needs to do better.


Post from March 30th, 2026.

Fall 2022:

I am having symptoms of what I assume to be overactive bladder: i constantly feel like I need to go but only small amounts come out when i try. It starts to completely take over my life and causes me a ton of pain. when I mention it to a close friend who also has bladder issues at the beginning of 2023, he says that it sounds a lot like i might actually be retaining urine. I have a lot on my plate and try to ignore it- something I really regret now.

In june 2023, I end up in the er for severe left flank pain. I have hypermobile ehlers-danlos with a lot of vascular involvement so there is some concern for rupture of one of my abdominal organs. While there, I struggle immensely with giving a urine sample. They tell me that the pain is most likely muscle strain and send me home.

later that week, i end up in the hospital for a central line complication and end up being admitted. While there, the pain gets worse and worse and i don’t know why. Then, one day halfway through my admission, i get a severe migraine – the worst I’ve ever had in my life.

the next day i cant pee at all.

i end up leaving the hospital with a foley catheter. I have the foley from july-october, which is when I end up getting a suprapubic catheter placed instead. Pretty much as soon as I received the foley, I started having constant utis due to my body trying to reject the foreign object. then, then suprapubic cather that is first placed ends up being silicone. i don’t know at the time, but I am allergic to silicone. healing takes much longer than it should and i constantly have severe irritation at the site.

the utis go on for the next nearly 3 years, getting worse and worse over time. for the first two years they are about monthly. I end up opting to eventually get a surgery to remove my bladder and get a urostomy in order to try to curb the infections.

Then, in 2025, the utis ramp up. One day, i grow a very resistant bug that doesn’t end up getting treated because the doctors assume that its contamination. i end up on iv antibiotics for another bacteria that i grow at the same time. I am inpatient for several days and go home on the iv antibiotics

that weekend, i start feeling really REALLY sick and am unsure why. assume that the antibiotics might not be working well but home anyway because i am exhausted. That monday I get labs done with home health.

when labs come in, my white blood cell count is 26. i feel awful. my vitals are all over the place and I cant stay upright. my pcp sends me into the er and then my infectious disease provider also calls that same day to send me in as well. in the hospital, they do blood cultures, see that my urine looks clean (due to the fact that im already on abx, mind you) give me a single dose of a strong antibiotic, tell me it must be a virus, and send me home.

that evening; i see the term "sepsis" in myportal for the first time. i was diagnosed my remote evaluation. im not sure what to do after being dismissed and go home to rest. The next morning, I get a call. my blood cultures are positive. I have bacteremia. they tell me to come in to the er but also try to say that the TWO positive cultures from different parts of my body might be a fluke. The doctor says that they might keep me or cut me loose. they end up keeping me. I have never felt to sick in my life.

Because of the type of bug it is, they assume its a central line infection. When they do a second set of cultures, though, nothing grows – this is most likely due to the face that they’d given me a heavy dose of abx the day before admission. I struggle with constant symptoms and gaslighting for weeks and am told several times that maybe it isn’t even bacteremia and sepsis and that is maybe been a false alarm. I no longer have a central line due to them removing it because of the bacteremia. I end up so unwell and afraid of them letting me d1e that I end up moving in with my partner across the country for support.

the infection symptoms continue for the rest of the year until now (2026). I have chronic low grade fevers and every time I end up with a positive uti things spiral and I end up meeting the sepsis criteria again. The doctors start refusing to treat because they assume that the urine samples are either colonization or contamination. I get sicker and sicker. I no longer have the ability to swallow and take oral pills but everyone is hesitant to replace my line so I end up mostly losing vascular access. They refuse to consider urostomy for me due to my size despite the fact that id already been approved in my old state (arizona) and had even had it schedule before I had to move.

my partner and i break up and I move back to arizona. The cycle continues but there is finally a light at the end up the tunnel because my surgery is scheduled. unfortunately, the utis get worse. I am now getting diagnosed with urosepsis every couple weeks, finish treatment, and immediately get deathly ill again as soon as I finish treatment.

finally; the week of surgery arrives! I end up inpatient for a few days that week due to another severe uti. I can not stay awake or take care of myself at this point due to feeling so unwell and tell me hospitalist that I am afraid I won’t be able to keep up with my treatment, causing my surgery to potentially get pushed back. He sends me home anyways. I even get security called on me when I try to appeal discharge.

then, my worst fear comes true. after a week of meeting the sepsis criteria still, i end up getting admitted for severe sepsis and lactic acidosis on saturday (the day before yesterday). I am told that I am "septic as hell" and that surgery will have to be pushed back to avoid the risk of bacteremia + other complications of manipulating an infected urinary tract

my surgeon is army reserve and out of town long chunks of the year. because of the surgery getting pushed back and him having to leave in a few weeks, it may be another several months until I get the surgery. all because every doctor that I see refuses to listen to me despite me having relived this pattern for the last year.

because I am so unwell; i am no longer able to consistently keep up with my medications at home. ive spent the last week almost fully unconscious and 95% bedbound. I nearly died. again.

I am SO screwed and petrified that these people might k1ll me purely because they refuse to listen

Already quite a few red flags! Let’s go through her old posts and see if her story checks out.
Luckily, Aster has been chronically oversharing on Tumblr, often live-blogging, since at least 2014, so it shouldn't be too hard to pry apart fiction from reality.

Teaser of things to come:

Next Part: 2014-2017. Teenage Tumblr antics.

 

[Zemblan Physics]

Interdasting specimen! Thank you, @Systems All The Way Down

Sounds to me like she propably had functional urinary retention, but that it was addressed as a medical issue by some idiot who gave her an SPC? Many such cases. Had they persevered in making her intermittently cath herself the issue probably would have resolved itself eventually. I'm no urologist, but functional urinary retention is not uncommon in psych EDs. Never seen it addressed surgically.

One thing impressed me about this retard though: she writes grammatically correct sentences. So there's that.

 

[Systems All The Way Down]

Aster: Part 1​

2012-2014: High School
(Some of these screenshots may be slightly chronologically out of order, but they should be accurate to the month).

Spoiler

August 2012: Aster, at age 15, is posting about Autism-related activist issues on Facebook.



She posts about being 'hypomanic':




She's also doing a bit of a Wicca larp:


These tagged text posts were all made from Christmas Day to the end of December. Spam-posting like this was something she did semi-regularly. She's very fixated on race and gender issues already. She claims to be "black/native/norwegian/sami native."

And she has already incorporated the color lavender into her identity.


Here, we get the first e-begging post that I'm aware of. (Also December 2014).
I highly recommend reading this post in full, as she gives a lot of background.




Self-discovery journey making her wonder if she's a "median" system.

And later that same month, she's already identifying as one.

Directing people to follow "Ari's" blog. (It's one of her "alter's" blogs.)

Learned Helplessness levels are already critical.


Average Tumblrite

Claims meds are making her more unstable. Mom was right, I guess!

She's in an online "lesbian" relationship with an mtf

The way attention-seeking behavior manifests on activist Tumblr in this era is just bizarre.

Already misappropriating funds. (Right to left)

Leaning into the psychosis angle

2015: An unbelievable amount of online slapfights

Spoiler

Febuary 2015. Aster makes another dono post that's very similar to the one she made a few months prior.
Some additional claims:
- Her mom is physically disabled and neuro-atypical but refuses to work on her violent urges
- Aster is going to a private school, citing that as a reason why they are so poor.


Aster weighs in on the Tumblr dress meme


At this point, Aster's main URLs are 'demixirl' and 'voidboi'. And she's hear to say that being gay and trans IS a choice! And that's valid!

Graduating from regular gymnastics to mental gymnastics.

This is what she spends her free time doing.

Celebrating Trans day of Visibility

Another ebegging post in May 2015. The update in this one is that she's back in homeschool.
Summary of new information:
- Now identifying as #actuallyborderline
- Being homeschooled again "due to her disabilities"
- Mom is supposedly hiding her meds and threatening to take her off her insurance

Aster creates "a list of privileges and disprivileges so that people on here know what im allowed to talk about"
I wonder if this kind of environment would, perhaps, incentivize people to collect oppressed identities?

This one is just so ignorant and presumptuous it's hilarious. my god.

Many of these posts are recovered from reblogs on other people's blogs, as she seems to have deleted her old blog.
June 2015: Mom has left the state, as Aster didn't go with her for "reasons"


July.
Not reblogging my selfies is racist.
(A lot of these screenshots are very crunchy for some reason. It'll get better eventually.)

Aster fails an audition for something. She gets home and has to clean up maggots off the kitchen floor. #disordered eating

She gets in a retarded fight with people on Tumblr because she insists that Lapiz Lauzli from Steven Universe (a blue alien) is an asian woman and therefore cannot be kinned by white people. People point out that if the white people can't kin an asian woman, then a black person probably can't either. She has a meltdown about it.

She then pivots to insisting that she has monolids, and since Lapiz's voice actor is asian, we can assume that her perfectly-round cartoon eyes actually represent monolids. Therefore, it is OK for aster to kin Lapiz Lazuli.

I don't think she understands what monolids are.

Claims mom beat her up and ripped her shirt and left her at a hotel. suicide baits.


August.
No longer asexual, now bisexual.

Clumsily planting seeds for a full-blown DID arc

"i can't apply for college because I'M HOMELESS (staying at my grandma's house)"


More Steven Universe kin nonsense. This time, the orange alien and the white alien are non-white.

Grandma calls Aster chubby.

But Aster is recovering from an eating disorder

Aster is apparently polyamorous and has 3 simultaneous, almost certainly long-distance, girlfriends.


Aster says she's refusing to move anywhere with her mom besides Florida

Complaining about how comphet makes her avoid using she/her pronouns to talk about her girlfriends... so Aster instead uses they/them pronouns for his he/him girlfriend. ok.

Suicide Bait

Looking for a place to stay in detroit

Yet again, upset at posts that point out that mentally ill people can be abusive

Gonna say with my new gf and her bf in detroit

Claims she has a scar that's a bite mark from her mom

This post is just confusing

Aster is stranded in Tenessee for reasons I don't fully understand. (Links were broken and not archived)

Aster has found a paypiggy

Official label is now poly ace nb lesbian

More stories of abuse from mom. Claims mom dislocated her finger in retaliation for Aster saying something rude.

"New gf" that Aster was going to stay with spoke with Aster's mom and sides with the mom. lol.

Both mom and grandma think Aster is the abuser

Complains that her mom says that Aster only ever tells her side of the story.
Aster says she's "afraid that everyone's right" and that her "perception of reality is warped" and that she's "a liar". How can you be lying if it's just your warped perception?

Aster upgrades three words to slurs.

Aster calls herself controlling and reactive

suicide baiting

says mom had a "valid reason" to pour juice on her and drag her to the floor by her hair and kick her out of the house

"i am not a woman by white standards". admits to having past male attraction. wants to be a male-attracted, non-woman lesbian.

HOMELESS and staying with my gma (who i hate)

another e-beg

priorities while threatened with homelessness: telling people to unfollow someone that you suspect sent you a mean anonymous message

aster's mom says she's afraid aster might murder her

Aster has purchased a new laptop. Perfect for making a new donations post!

random selfies

Aster has attracted a hater. (All of these blogs are hers. I haven't really discussed this, but she's usually running 1 main blog, 1 secret personal blog, 1 fandom blog, 1 aesthetic blog, and 1 quotes blog at any given time, with varying levels of activity.)




Daddy issues. He is in fact a Norwegian guy, living in Norway. But is he Sami?


Another life update in the form of a donation post.
Updates: Moved to Arizona with her mom after spending summer with her grandma. Supposedly, her grandma is paying her mom's bills.

grandma thinks aster should be in a group home

im 18 but actually i look 14 teehe

new alter. pronouns: "ae fae she or it, but only use them if you're speaking about me positively"

supposedly there is a whole community of aster haters

claiming to be stalked by someone from cypress, texas


apparently got url-sniped by someone she knew. and now she feels "unsafe" on tumblr

meltdown

November:
PSA that "spooky" is racist

I most people would consider Aster 'non-white', but it's just hilarious in this context. "i'm not a girl but i'm kind of a girl, therefore, i am can be a lesbian. this is because i am only half white, therefore non-white, therefore not white at all."
Aster claims that she is a rape victim (therefore less male-aligned and therefore more allowed to call herself a lesbian)

2016-2017: Misc minor life updates

Spoiler

I couldn't find that many posts from 2016 or 2017. Aster seems to have gotten into a LOT of Tumblr slapfights in this time period, and ended up DFE'ing once or twice.

February:
Ubering to and from college:

"wlw" is for black women only

so is "sgl"

attracting even more haters

"as if I care!" *reblogs donation post one more time and abandons blog*

June:
Mom is kicking holes into Aster's bedroom door.

July:
Aster wants top surgery. But wants to do it after breastfeeding her children.

New diagnosis acquired: Stockholm Syndrome

November:
Wishing her mom a happy birthday. And correcting of her mom's friends who misgenders her.

December:
Aster's dad reposts a Youcaring fundraiser to escape from her mom.

Aster asks the norwegians not to report her mom.

Other 2016:
Made a post on Transgender Housing Network


She gets a job as a gymnastics coach at some point. Her profile on the business's website:


2017

Aster with her brother:

World's wettest kiss.

Very manly.

If you're self-aware about attention-seeking, is it really even attention-seeking?

Dad doesn't believe Aster is autistic

Aster is teaching gymnastics and has dropped out of school. Mom chimes in.


Aster explains her autism diagnosis. Says she first suspected she had autism after learning about her little brother's atypical development.
Claims she cannot understand sarcasm, facial expressions, tone of voice, or body language. Says she cannot remember multiple directions. Conveniently, her verbal ability was perfectly intact (and even advanced! so special.)

Aster posts an article telling parents to stop gaslighting their kids.


November:
Going by "Vega" (an alter), maybe trying to keep a low-profile after previous drama.

That's it for today. Next time: 2018-2020: Chronic negligence.

 

[Dharma bump]

I dont know Alexandra, reads like NSW hospital risk teams said "our aspergillis and pigeon riddled hospitals are not compatible with your personal circumstances. Kind regards." to me.

 

[Tram Fan]

You think it’s OK for a DID system to have alters that identify as a race that's darker-skinned than the host body's race (lighter-skinned races ok)

For the unaware girls this retard talks about this bitch dissocia did
So basically put this retard in one bag with Ace if the bag is big enough. That drama was super retarded and it was a few years ago. Basically Chloe aka Dissocia is a totally non munchie true and honest woman non binary system of alters. She claimed that one of the alters Nadia I think was a native American. The problem is that Chloe is white as snow so retards wanted to stone her like muslims stone women sometimes. Yes she got no control of her alters if you believe her but who cares.

If theirs ever a first doctor with down syndrome, i guarantee you they'll have graduated from Monash university and work at the Alfred, and somehow done it faster then Alexandra.

And that downie doctor* would be a better doctor because they'd probably give more fuck about doing their best. I'm not saying they'd be a good doctor.

* in Polish we sometimes say a downie instead of a person with down syndrome which is considered very mean and impolite

She went to Australia for 8 weeks to work something like 2 weeks in palliative care, 2 weeks in geriatrics and 4 weeks in ED.

GODS BE GOOD WHAT THE FUCK
Very fucking thankful I'm not in Australia. What was she thinking? If I was in her situation I'd try to avoid the ED rotation entirely one way or another. Geriatrics? Ugh depends what geriatrics but it's unlikely anyway. The ED? Fuck no.

By train Cardiff-London is roughly 2 hours, not including getting to to/from the station at either end. Dorset is making little difference to her life if she's sayingi it'll be a 2.5 hour journey- but she should just live there and see her specialists when needed, not spend the £1000s commuting back and forth

Yes agreed the math isn't mathing additionally a plane to Australia also costs a shitload of money. I wanted to ask if she gets any discounts for the train tickets. In Poland she would get 51% discount for herself and 95% for her guide which can be just her mate or family. And obviously she'd get the disability seat. Doesn't it work similarly in the UK? She has disability papers for her blindness right? This would be super funny if she didn't have the disability papers xd

You are a zionist, a transmisogyny denialist, a transandrophobia truther, a pro-shipper, or an anti-anti

I'm ESL i got 0 fucking idea what those phrases mean apart from zionist
I'm absolutely against denying transmisogyny. Trannies are very fucking misogynic towards real women.

You think fiction =/= reality

I've taken some philosophy classes so I know that reality doesn't exist and therefore reality is fiction I wasn't listening during those classes.

You don’t disclose your race in your profile

Thankfully I disclose my Slavic race in every other post so I guess I'm allowed to pist on this retard's page.

 

[glioblastoma multiforme]

Yes agreed the math isn't mathing additionally a plane to Australia also costs a shitload of money. I wanted to ask if she gets any discounts for the train tickets.

Yep- £1500 for cattle class this year pre-Iran shit interfering with many routes- UK-Aus is usually via Qatar, UAE, or Singapore (who naturally jacked up their prices the moment shit went down). Up from £1000 last year. This is why my Aus family get one wedding each. I think she did it just before things got uncertain and way more expensive.

She is eligible for a disabled persons train card. I don't know about carers. I do know that for buses you can get a card that allows you a carer for free. It will still be eye-wateringly expensive though. Also part of the South Coast line nearly fell into the sea a few years back, so beyond how unreliable UK trains are in general, she might have shit like that to contend with. If she really chooses the 2.5 hour commute, she'll need to leave 4 hours before her shift starts to have even a chance of reliably making it on time.

Thank you @Systems All The Way Down for the presentation of Aster, I feel kinda sorry for her, but fucking hell you do not get sent home if sepsis is even suspected. And its not a one big shot of antibiotics type of deal. I also don't believe that doctors owuld dismiss bacteremia findings as "contamination" - if your pathology lab is that bad then you are in for a shit ton of law suits. Bacteria shouldn't be in your blood stream, ever afaik, I can't imagine a doctor dismissing it.