Ask men why they do things the way they do and maybe you'll get an honest answer

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Epic Fail Man said:
when you hang out too often with a man his instincts kick in. In the mind of a man when they build a "friendship" with a woman they see the end goal as "pussy", always.
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I would say this is a significant oversimplification. I think it's more accurate to say the end goal is intimacy, and although that generally includes pussy too, it also includes close friendship. Some of the deepest conversations I've had are with female friends. I often joke about how illogical women can be, but I honestly treasure their companionship and take on things. There are conversations that are best had with buddies, and then there are conversations that need that intimate knowledge that I've only been able to have with female friends.
 
Was puberty traumatic, and how good/bad of a job did the adults in your life do helping you navigate it? What would you do differently if you were in their position?
 
Arbiter said:
Was puberty traumatic, and how good/bad of a job did the adults in your life do helping you navigate it? What would you do differently if you were in their position?
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Women moment.

Periods are some how traumatic to girls. While male puberty is you sound like a twat while your voice changes (and get the piss taken out of you), then you have to ask your parents for a razor to shave and get on with things. It's mild embarrassment and banter.
 
Kofi Drinka said:
Women moment.

Periods are some how traumatic to girls. While male puberty is you sound like a twat while your voice changes (and get the piss taken out of you), then you have to ask your parents for a razor to shave and get on with things. It's mild embarrassment and banter.
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Maybe “distressing” would have been a better word, but I still wanted to hold the door open in case it really was that bad for you guys. I’m glad it wasn’t anything worse than some embarrassment.
 
Arbiter said:
Maybe “distressing” would have been a better word, but I still wanted to hold the door open in case it really was that bad for you guys. I’m glad it wasn’t anything worse than some embarrassment.
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My memories of it are finding it embarrassing to squeak when you talk and not knowing how to ask my mother to buy me a shaver set. Male puberty doesn't really have big changes. You get taller, your voice changes and you learn to shave. Periods and all that revolting stuff means women have to actually manage their puberty changes and might end up with a bloody pair of trousers if they don't. But boys just get bigger and have clashes with their Dad because "I'm as big as you are and I'm a man now" type of bullshit conflict most boys do. A weird power struggle between the head of the house and the now coming of age male.
 
Arbiter said:
What would you do differently if you were in their position?
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I woulldn't let my son have unsupervised access to any electronics with internet access (and just being in a central location does not guarantee that usage of a family computer will be supervised at every moment). And I wouldn't have grounded him from reading books when he was younger so that he was already accustomed to hiding things from me.
 
Ass Dan said:
I'm dating myself with this probably, but why do men like Rush so much? I mean it's not like they suck or anything, they're fine, but I really don't get the level of appeal that they seem to have for males. Geddy Lee sounds like a cartoon villain.
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Depends which type of Rush they like.

Early stuff: They are a chad Tolkien and LSD 70s motherfucker who still rocks sideburns and probably owns a Gibson Les Paul.

Post-2112 stuff: They're a faggot. Dump them.
 
Epic Fail Man said:
Men will get the wrong idea. It is very hard to have a platonic friendship with a opposite genders, at least at a certain level of intimacy men and women have friendships with each other. There are few cases where it works but it's like 2% of the time and they most be in very specific points in their lives.
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I don't know if I agree with this. I've had plenty of women friends over the years and the majority of them I wouldn't actually want to be in any kind of intimate relationship with. They're not fucked up people or ugly or anything I just know things would never work out with any of them and it would be fucking weird and the thought of ever being like that with any of them never really even crossed my mind. Then again, I've been in a steady relationship for a lot my life and most of the women I've been friends with were also in relationships, but not always, so that may be why.
 
Kofi Drinka said:
Women moment.

Periods are some how traumatic to girls. While male puberty is you sound like a twat while your voice changes (and get the piss taken out of you), then you have to ask your parents for a razor to shave and get on with things. It's mild embarrassment and banter.
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You sound like a twat while having a boner in class for no reason, don't forget about that.
 
Arbiter said:
Alright men, how do you feel about women who are not interested/not single giving men compliments? Sometimes I want to give men platonic compliments like I would to other women, but I hold off as to not give the wrong idea. Do you think women should feel more comfortable doing this or is it unbecoming? Do you think this would improve the general relationship between the sexes or would it sow confusion and discord? What would you teach your daughter?
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As a rule . . . don't.

Never underestimate male optimism, ambition, and inability to read cues.
 
Nick Wilde said:
Depends which type of Rush they like.

Early stuff: They are a chad Tolkien and LSD 70s motherfucker who still rocks sideburns and probably owns a Gibson Les Paul.

Post-2112 stuff: They're a faggot. Dump them.
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Post-2112!? Are you nuts? That’s so early! Even I would give them credit up through Moving Pictures (and honestly they’re the only bit of music that got through the 80’s largely intact).
 
Arbiter said:
Was puberty traumatic, and how good/bad of a job did the adults in your life do helping you navigate it? What would you do differently if you were in their position?
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It wasn't the worst experience. I went from being a shrimpy little child to being tall and broad so fast I ran through a lot of clothes. Lots of shitty hand-me-downs from other families. Wouldn't say I got a straight answer on what being a 'good man' is at any point, most of it revolved around working yourself to the bone for a wife. The lesson I took from it is you should do what you can for your loved ones no matter what they are or the tasks you are doing. Don't lean on them to do it all even if they might be able to do it.

I was also told a lot about what 'women want' from family and it wasn't accurate in the slightest. It translated mostly into being a doormat who was there to be an emotional crutch for his partner. All the lessons I learned from that were from observing others and my own mistakes. What 'women want' isn't a universal thing but trying to really care about what might be on their mind helps.
 
Arbiter said:
Was puberty traumatic, and how good/bad of a job did the adults in your life do helping you navigate it? What would you do differently if you were in their position?
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Wasn't traumatic, turned me from a little shitbag to a larger shitbag. Family didn't help too much other than gifting me razors and patience. Only thing I remember that was "awful" was no matter how much I scrubbed and washed my body, the BO would come back within an hour. Not sure what will be done differently, I will cross that bridge if I even make it there.
 
Ass Dan said:
I'm dating myself with this probably, but why do men like Rush so much? I mean it's not like they suck or anything, they're fine, but I really don't get the level of appeal that they seem to have for males. Geddy Lee sounds like a cartoon villain.
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i really dont know i argee there all right but they arent amazing or anything but i dont really like prog rock in general
 
Arbiter said:
Was puberty traumatic, and how good/bad of a job did the adults in your life do helping you navigate it? What would you do differently if you were in their position?
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My puberty was great

I would get out of school and go work at my dads office. At 15~16 i got my first girfriend! End up flunking a year because i'd skip class and take her home instead, i don't regret it though. How i did not end a teenage dad was sheer luck, my life could have gone a whole different direction

Despite that i had pretty mild teenage years, school, work, hang out with friends on the weekends. I was in my extreme metal phase but my parents didn't nag me about it. I remember fondly dad taking me to a record store, he bought me a Cannibal Corpse shirt, it was from the Eaten Back to Life album

When i'd fuck up, dad would have a stern talk to me. I'd honestly rather get my ass beat then listening to the sermons, but hell, they worked. I was terrified of letting dad down. He taught me about women and how to handle rejection and how to spot a bad relationship before it developed. I see today that Dad was a wise man, i miss him so much
 
McMitch said:
Post-2112!? Are you nuts? That’s so early! Even I would give them credit up through Moving Pictures (and honestly they’re the only bit of music that got through the 80’s largely intact).
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2112 is where they blew their load creatively. It was a prodigiously voluminous, viscous and virile nut, but it is where they peaked.

This isn't even my most controversial Rush take- Caress of Steel is my favorite one.
 
oldTireWater said:
Never underestimate male optimism, ambition, and inability to read cues.
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I think most men can handle them fine, but some of us are actually delusional when it comes to this. That being said, if the guy is mentally stable, it can really make our day, I still think back to a compliment I got maybe 5 years ago, though a completely random compliment would probably just feel insincere.
Also I should add, that most men will see any relationship with a woman as a path towards a romantic one. Most does not mean all, but it is a very strong trend I see with a lot of my friends. If I were a woman, I'd probably make it clear that I am in a relationship (even if I were not). Not when someone asks me, but as soon as possible.
 
Arbiter said:
Was puberty traumatic, and how good/bad of a job did the adults in your life do helping you navigate it? What would you do differently if you were in their position?
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Not traumatic, at least probably not in the way that it is for women.

But it is fucking exhausting to be suddenly controlled a lot by your urges with no way to handle it, young boys are perma-horny, stunted fuckers, even the shy, quiet ones.

You get boners constantly and this is somehow your fault as if you could control it.

Women really have no idea about the intensity of male horniness, they think they do but they don't.
 
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