Ordinary sausage / Mr. Sausage - Internet sausage dad.

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The Projects said:
Wait a fucking second, I recognize all of these suggestions and statements from the comments... How outsized is the presence of Kiwis in the Sausagesphere?
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NUH UH
I really want a regrind on all of his 0/5's, like a serious attempt to fix whatever made them disqualified (if edible, so no toxic, inedible sausages) or simply just a 0, and I want to see what horror an "Oops All 5/5" sausage would be. Every sausage that got a 5/5, in the same sausage. Sausageception.
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That would definitely burn a hole in Mrs. Sausage's wallet..
 
I went and re-watched the Lobster Sausage, and I realized how much of an inflection point it is in the sausage man universe, he was THIS close to becoming a sanitized foodtoober, at this point all of his fun shenanigans could have been smoothed out and he could have become a copy paste foodie guy, but I think the water sausage immediately after it just broke him, and the great sausage in the sky just took him over like the Mask. After Lobster and Water Sausages, he was just never the same, and his madness has slowly but surely metastasized, he MUST push the sausage arts forward, he MUST push his food ideas forward. It has to get crazier, it has to get more maniacal, he doesn't have a choice, the life and death thrill of sausaging has consumed him whole. He is but meat in the grinder, and the sausage of his life MUST be pushed out, poked and cooked, be it in the pan, the smoker, the griddle or the toaster oven.

What hell hath been wrought upon this man?
 
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The Projects said:
I went and re-watched the Lobster Sausage, and I realized how much of an inflection point it is in the sausage man universe, he was THIS close to becoming a sanitized foodtoober, at this point all of his fun shenanigans could have been smoothed out and he could have become a copy paste foodie guy, but I think the water sausage immediately after it just broke him, and the great sausage in the sky just took him over like the Mask. After Lobster and Water Sausages, he was just never the same, and his madness has slowly but surely metastasized, he MUST push the sausage arts forward, he MUST push his food ideas forward. It has to get crazier, it has to get more maniacal, he doesn't have a choice, the life and death thrill of sausaging has consumed him whole. He is but meat in the grinder, and the sausage of his life MUST be pushed out, poked and cooked, be it in the pan, the smoker, the griddle or the toaster oven.

What hell hath been wrought upon this man?
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Probably the infinity+1 dollar lobster sausage.
 
New Sausage Dropped. Anti-vampire style. The opposite of a Valentine's Day sausage. Sure, just throw whole cloves in there. What could possibly go wrong?

 
The Projects said:
he was THIS close to becoming a sanitized foodtoober, at this point all of his fun shenanigans could have been smoothed out and he could have become a copy paste foodie guy, but I think the water sausage immediately after it just broke him, and the great sausage in the sky just took him over like the Mask.
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Despite my post criticizing him a couple pages back, this is why I’m still subscribed. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a YouTuber start to get kinda cringe/bad and then realize “You know what, this is a bit much.” then walk something back (I’m specifically thinking about when he started showing his face on camera and having a whole fan mail segment).

Self-awareness like that is rare as hell on the Internet these days; I’ve seen plenty of people on YouTube get better over time, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen one get less bad, if that makes sense.
 
Rango Dango said:
I was mad he didnt give it 5 mark ruffalos
perfect accuracy, stayed mostly together and in general it was a pretty nice hit
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a 5 Mark Ruffalo needs to be a catastrophic explosion of meat everywhere. The harder it is to clean up, the higher the Ruffalo.
 
Party Hat Wurmple said:
New Sausage Dropped. Anti-vampire style. The opposite of a Valentine's Day sausage. Sure, just throw whole cloves in there. What could possibly go wrong?

https://youtube.com/watch?v=p1MseDbgu7Q
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He must of have gotten lucky and missed a full clove because as some of you silly kiwis who fell into temptation probably know, biting a clove of garlic fucking burns. He also missed a funny opportunity to season it with garlic powder.
 
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Cat tit bingo said:
He must of have gotten lucky and missed a full clove because as some of you silly kiwis who fell into temptation probably know, biting a clove of garlic fucking burns. He also missed a funny opportunity to season it with garlic powder.
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Heating garlic takes the edge off, wouldn't be surprised the bagged garlic isn't as strong either. I'm surprised the raw garlic didn't weaken the casing though.
 
Cat tit bingo said:
He must of have gotten lucky and missed a full clove because as some of you silly kiwis who fell into temptation probably know, biting a clove of garlic fucking burns. He also missed a funny opportunity to season it with garlic powder.
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garlic's for pussies I put a whole clove of garlic in my urethra and I was only in danger of dying of boredom
 
The Projects said:
I went and re-watched the Lobster Sausage, and I realized how much of an inflection point it is in the sausage man universe, he was THIS close to becoming a sanitized foodtoober, at this point all of his fun shenanigans could have been smoothed out and he could have become a copy paste foodie guy, but I think the water sausage immediately after it just broke him, and the great sausage in the sky just took him over like the Mask. After Lobster and Water Sausages, he was just never the same, and his madness has slowly but surely metastasized, he MUST push the sausage arts forward, he MUST push his food ideas forward. It has to get crazier, it has to get more maniacal, he doesn't have a choice, the life and death thrill of sausaging has consumed him whole. He is but meat in the grinder, and the sausage of his life MUST be pushed out, poked and cooked, be it in the pan, the smoker, the griddle or the toaster oven.

What hell hath been wrought upon this man?
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Ordinary Sausage does not need metaphorical "off ramps", the lobster sausage was merely one part of the absurd culinary highway that is his journey on Youtube.
 
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