Blizzard of 2026 (January edition) thread - Preparing for Snowmageddon
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- Dec 16, 2019
I wrote up this impromptu "guide" for making living in the wake of these fucking things tolerable elsewhere, but thought I might post it here - people might find it useful. There's doubtlessly going to be a run on the stores [especially in the south/mid-Atlantic, but elsewhere too since Ohioans and the like STILL go and strip the shelves of milk/bread/eggs even if they're only calling for six inches of snow], I guess all of a sudden everybody gets in the mood for French toast when there's snow coming. But anyway, ice storms suck DICK. I would legitimately rather contend with any other weather event/conditions - aside from a derecho, of course. I'd probably take my chances in a fucking hurricane rather than an ice storm, as long as it isn't some Katrina-level event. Anyhow, having lived through quite a few of these fucking storms, here are some things I WISH I would have thought of before they hit:
Unironically if this weekend storm does what they think it's going to, shit's gonna get real rough in much of the mid-South. Legit if I lived down there I'd be stocking up on shit and getting the generator ready [or acquiring one if you don't currently have one] and I hardly ever do that for winter storms.
Even like 2-3 feet of snow isn't that big of a deal in Ohio because we have the infrastructure in place to deal with it, even in the worst lake effect/snowfall areas it'll take maybe twelve to eighteen hours for roads to be passable again unless the wind keeps blowing it back on the damn road [which does happen sometimes] because you'll typically have local county trucks and DOT staged ahead of time and ready to at least get a start on it.
But in the south, most states don't really have that infrastructure in quite that quantity and it's not usually on deck/ready to go like our shit is in the northern states/midwest.
And that's just for snow, ice is way fucking worse.
Like if some regions end up getting like 2 fucking inches of ice like these models seem to suggest, you're looking at like 4-5 days without power even in cities/towns, a week plus if you're out in the boonies. Ice storms are like a cascade of shit rolling downhill. The ice builds up on the powerlines and weighs them down or does the same to tree branches, pulling them down onto the lines, because the temps are so fucking cold transformers start blowing up. And unlike a regular windstorm or a severe thunderstorm, the power company can't just stage shit beforehand too well [because winter storm tracks are a lot more unpredictable] and they can't take off and go fix it as soon as the wind stops, the roads will be a fucking ice-skating rink so just like everyone else, they can't really go anywhere until state DOT/county trucks catch up and get salt/brine down or temps increase to melt it into slush. And a lot of southern counties might not keep much salt/brine on hand because most of the time they don't really need it, like Georgia, Arkansas and Alabama, I doubt they keep a lot on hand. There's also the fact that - and I'm not claiming northerners are any better because God knows they really aren't, but people in the south aren't used to driving in this shit. Then once the power goes out, your house starts getting cold within 6-8 hours depending on insulation, most people in the south don't have heat tape/cable because it's unnecessary 90% of the time and even if they do, the fucking power's out - usually.
So without A) actually having heat tape and B) connecting it to your generator, you're kinda fucked, your pipes are almost guaranteed to freeze and if they stay like that very long they'll start bursting under pressure. So you not only have no tap water and can't flush your fucking toilet but when it thaws out, you might have a bunch of leaks, like massive leaks. Pipes busting is a fucking disaster in a lot of cases because people might not know until it's flooding their basement or filling up a wall cavity somewhere. Thank God my pipes have never frozen to the point they busted and usually thawed out within a couple days when my heat tape wasn't working but it's so miserable to not have any water for an extended period, one winter I had to pack a bunch of ice in a bucket and wait for it to melt so I could flush my toilet and I had grass and dead leaves in the tank lmao. You can't take a fucking shower or even a whore's bath out of the sink, usually can't cook if anything needs boiling, can't wash dishes or make coffee, etc.
People always seem to focus on food when prepping but a healthy individual can go about two weeks without ANY food - longer if you're a fat fuck [and we're on Kiwi Farms, most of us are fat fucks] but understock water, fuel, batteries, etc.
So I guess my "pro-tips" would be:
Anyway, good fucking luck Dixiebros - shit sucks.
Unironically if this weekend storm does what they think it's going to, shit's gonna get real rough in much of the mid-South. Legit if I lived down there I'd be stocking up on shit and getting the generator ready [or acquiring one if you don't currently have one] and I hardly ever do that for winter storms.
Even like 2-3 feet of snow isn't that big of a deal in Ohio because we have the infrastructure in place to deal with it, even in the worst lake effect/snowfall areas it'll take maybe twelve to eighteen hours for roads to be passable again unless the wind keeps blowing it back on the damn road [which does happen sometimes] because you'll typically have local county trucks and DOT staged ahead of time and ready to at least get a start on it.
But in the south, most states don't really have that infrastructure in quite that quantity and it's not usually on deck/ready to go like our shit is in the northern states/midwest.
And that's just for snow, ice is way fucking worse.
Like if some regions end up getting like 2 fucking inches of ice like these models seem to suggest, you're looking at like 4-5 days without power even in cities/towns, a week plus if you're out in the boonies. Ice storms are like a cascade of shit rolling downhill. The ice builds up on the powerlines and weighs them down or does the same to tree branches, pulling them down onto the lines, because the temps are so fucking cold transformers start blowing up. And unlike a regular windstorm or a severe thunderstorm, the power company can't just stage shit beforehand too well [because winter storm tracks are a lot more unpredictable] and they can't take off and go fix it as soon as the wind stops, the roads will be a fucking ice-skating rink so just like everyone else, they can't really go anywhere until state DOT/county trucks catch up and get salt/brine down or temps increase to melt it into slush. And a lot of southern counties might not keep much salt/brine on hand because most of the time they don't really need it, like Georgia, Arkansas and Alabama, I doubt they keep a lot on hand. There's also the fact that - and I'm not claiming northerners are any better because God knows they really aren't, but people in the south aren't used to driving in this shit. Then once the power goes out, your house starts getting cold within 6-8 hours depending on insulation, most people in the south don't have heat tape/cable because it's unnecessary 90% of the time and even if they do, the fucking power's out - usually.
So without A) actually having heat tape and B) connecting it to your generator, you're kinda fucked, your pipes are almost guaranteed to freeze and if they stay like that very long they'll start bursting under pressure. So you not only have no tap water and can't flush your fucking toilet but when it thaws out, you might have a bunch of leaks, like massive leaks. Pipes busting is a fucking disaster in a lot of cases because people might not know until it's flooding their basement or filling up a wall cavity somewhere. Thank God my pipes have never frozen to the point they busted and usually thawed out within a couple days when my heat tape wasn't working but it's so miserable to not have any water for an extended period, one winter I had to pack a bunch of ice in a bucket and wait for it to melt so I could flush my toilet and I had grass and dead leaves in the tank lmao. You can't take a fucking shower or even a whore's bath out of the sink, usually can't cook if anything needs boiling, can't wash dishes or make coffee, etc.
People always seem to focus on food when prepping but a healthy individual can go about two weeks without ANY food - longer if you're a fat fuck [and we're on Kiwi Farms, most of us are fat fucks] but understock water, fuel, batteries, etc.
So I guess my "pro-tips" would be:
1. If you ain't got a generator or an inverter or something to provide power, try to get one. Yes, they're expensive, yes they can be a big pain in the ass at times, but it's better than freezing to death or shelling out $5000+ when your pipes are busted.
2. If you ain't got heat tape/cable, try to get some and wrap it around any exposed plumbing supply lines or vulnerable exterior wall plumbing, either that or get some foam insulation [pool noodles cut in half actually work pretty good for this] to put around your pipes. Be careful with heat tape/cable - get the kind with a thermostat which reads the ambient temperature and kicks on only when necessary, but it can absolutely cause a fire if you're not careful. If you live in an area where the temp only drops below zero degrees Fahrenheit a few times a decade, I'd probably just disconnect it and huck it in the shed/garage until you know you're going to need it. In northern states, it's usually plugged in year-round. Generally in most cases you only have to worry about pipes freezing if it's below 20 degrees for a long period of time - especially if you have a lot of plumbing in exterior walls, or you live in a manufactured home, but most of the time it needs to be single digits or lower for 24 hours or more to really be a big risk. If you're in a manufacturer home/mobile home, pretty much ALL of your pipes are exterior pipes - running beneath the floor, so it is extremely important there to have good heat tape. Luckily, it's usually a lot easier to install due to better access. Also, turn on your sinks faucets/tub taps to a trickle when temps are this low - running water freezes much more slowly than water that's just sitting in your pipes. You don't need it on full blast, just a solid little stream, especially the sink/tub which is furthest from where the main line connects - usually a master bath upstairs or something like that.
[of course you need an accessible outlet to plug in the heat tape which can be a fucking problem depending where the pipes are]
3. Have an alternative source of heat of some kind, electric heaters [if you have a generator, otherwise it won't do you any good] or propane/kerosene space heaters, or if you have a wood/pellet stove. Sometimes when I was a kid and the power was out, we'd fire up the gas oven and leave the door cracked - I'm told nowadays this isn't a good idea, but it worked pretty well back then. Only caveat is that you need one of the good gas ovens that doesn't use an electric ignitor, or maybe you can light it with a torch lighter. There's another tip, with no power you can usually light your stove burners in a pinch with a lighter, just don't singe your fucking eyebrows off. Camping stoves that run on propane/butane are a good investment too.
4. Have at least ten gallons of purified water kicking around, or fill up empty containers/jugs with tap water while you can, also if there's any chance the pipes might freeze - fill up your bath-tubs and sinks, maybe even your washing machine, you wouldn't want to drink any of it [since it's bath-tub/washing machine water] unless you're about to die of dehydration but you can at least use it to take a whore's bath, do dishes, flush the toilet, or I guess cook with it if you boil it first and you're not grossed out by where it came from.
[bath tubs and washing machines hold quite a bit of water - good for flushing toilets, also if you have to manually flush the toilet with outside water, pour it fast in the bowl to make it flush, don't fill the tank because it uses up/takes more water to do it]
5. Get fuel for your generator and make sure the cocksucker works before you need it, also check your extension cords and shit and make sure if you're gonna hook up appliances that your main cord is rated for a shit-ton of amps, you want a thick ass cable for that or it'll get hot, melt and potentially cause a fire
[also don't keep the generator running very close to your house but that's common sense, CO detectors are a good idea too if you're dealing with generators or heating with propane/kerosene]
6. Try to have at least a week's worth of shelf-stable, easy to prepare food on hand. Rice and beans, oats, canned goods, shit like that. Stuff that doesn't require refrigeration, keeps forever and is easy to prepare - you don't want to be assembling a fucking beef wellington like you're Gordon Ramsay in this shit. Buy more water than you think you'll need. Have a stock of common batteries on hand - AAs, AAAs, 9 volts, maybe even D-cells. Lithium-ion power banks are cheap as shit now and pack quite a punch, they're worth having on hand. Try to charge all of your mission critical shit [phone, laptop, tablet, etc.] before the onset of icing/wind.
At cold enough temps natural gas lines can start to freeze up and shit too so your primary heat source might fail even, ice can also block up your furnace exhaust vent/chimney [if you have natural gas, propane, or fuel oil heating] and either prevent it from working properly, or potentially result in exhaust gases backing up into your house, another great reason to have CO detectors although most modern furnaces won't operate in this condition for that specific reason. Anyway that's my crash course for living halfway comfortably in a bad snowstorm/icestorm, been through a few of them, they still fucking suck even if you're as ready as can be but it makes it tolerable at least. It ain't like a regular storm/derecho where you can just get the hell out of Dodge for a few days if shit's fucked and get a motel room somewhere that isn't a disaster area. Plan on not fucking going anywhere for 2-3 days pretty much, maybe longer, because you very likely will NOT be able to unless you have some Mad Max mobile and tire chains. Don't assume that just because you have a 4x4 that it doesn't apply to you - I'm a county plow truck driver and after every big snow event, I'm yanking Dodge Rams and the like out of the ditch all fucking night because Cleetus wanted to make a beer run and assumed he'd be fine because he's got winter tires and 4Wd. Also make sure your car/truck's fuel tank is topped up and if you have a trickle charger, fucking use it, if all else fails you can always start it up and use your vehicle for heat/to charge your phone or other devices, in a pinch you could sleep there - but make sure your tailpipe isn't obstructed. If your fuel tank is full, if you need to, you can siphon fuel out of the car to put in the generator if it's absolutely necessary. Diesels may benefit from an oil/engine block warmer, too - so that you can actually fire up your rig. Have a good jump-starter, too - car batteries fucking hate cold weather.
If your pipes do freeze and you want to give it a shot at thawing them out - and this won't be an easy task if temps remain very low, but your best bet is a hair dryer on HIGH or a heat gun - heat gun will be the absolute best. If you know where the ice jam is [usually pipes in an exterior wall, or in some cases the exterior pipe which feeds your house] you could also try to boil some bottled water and dump it on there slowly. In any case, be careful - especially with a heat gun, it's really fucking easy to start a fire with them. You can also open the cupboard doors beneath your sinks to help circulate [relatively] warmer air around the pipes.
And if you already have all of this stuff on deck - a generator, power banks, trickle charger for your car battery, kerosene/propane heater, etc. - take the time NOW to make sure that it's functioning properly and ready to go. Don't dick around and wait to yank the generator out of the shed when your kids' bedrooms are 40 degrees Fahrenheit and your wife's got frost in her eyebrows only to find that the cocksucker won't start or there's no oil in it. Do it now, make sure this shit is working BEFORE you need it.
2. If you ain't got heat tape/cable, try to get some and wrap it around any exposed plumbing supply lines or vulnerable exterior wall plumbing, either that or get some foam insulation [pool noodles cut in half actually work pretty good for this] to put around your pipes. Be careful with heat tape/cable - get the kind with a thermostat which reads the ambient temperature and kicks on only when necessary, but it can absolutely cause a fire if you're not careful. If you live in an area where the temp only drops below zero degrees Fahrenheit a few times a decade, I'd probably just disconnect it and huck it in the shed/garage until you know you're going to need it. In northern states, it's usually plugged in year-round. Generally in most cases you only have to worry about pipes freezing if it's below 20 degrees for a long period of time - especially if you have a lot of plumbing in exterior walls, or you live in a manufactured home, but most of the time it needs to be single digits or lower for 24 hours or more to really be a big risk. If you're in a manufacturer home/mobile home, pretty much ALL of your pipes are exterior pipes - running beneath the floor, so it is extremely important there to have good heat tape. Luckily, it's usually a lot easier to install due to better access. Also, turn on your sinks faucets/tub taps to a trickle when temps are this low - running water freezes much more slowly than water that's just sitting in your pipes. You don't need it on full blast, just a solid little stream, especially the sink/tub which is furthest from where the main line connects - usually a master bath upstairs or something like that.
[of course you need an accessible outlet to plug in the heat tape which can be a fucking problem depending where the pipes are]
3. Have an alternative source of heat of some kind, electric heaters [if you have a generator, otherwise it won't do you any good] or propane/kerosene space heaters, or if you have a wood/pellet stove. Sometimes when I was a kid and the power was out, we'd fire up the gas oven and leave the door cracked - I'm told nowadays this isn't a good idea, but it worked pretty well back then. Only caveat is that you need one of the good gas ovens that doesn't use an electric ignitor, or maybe you can light it with a torch lighter. There's another tip, with no power you can usually light your stove burners in a pinch with a lighter, just don't singe your fucking eyebrows off. Camping stoves that run on propane/butane are a good investment too.
4. Have at least ten gallons of purified water kicking around, or fill up empty containers/jugs with tap water while you can, also if there's any chance the pipes might freeze - fill up your bath-tubs and sinks, maybe even your washing machine, you wouldn't want to drink any of it [since it's bath-tub/washing machine water] unless you're about to die of dehydration but you can at least use it to take a whore's bath, do dishes, flush the toilet, or I guess cook with it if you boil it first and you're not grossed out by where it came from.
[bath tubs and washing machines hold quite a bit of water - good for flushing toilets, also if you have to manually flush the toilet with outside water, pour it fast in the bowl to make it flush, don't fill the tank because it uses up/takes more water to do it]
5. Get fuel for your generator and make sure the cocksucker works before you need it, also check your extension cords and shit and make sure if you're gonna hook up appliances that your main cord is rated for a shit-ton of amps, you want a thick ass cable for that or it'll get hot, melt and potentially cause a fire
[also don't keep the generator running very close to your house but that's common sense, CO detectors are a good idea too if you're dealing with generators or heating with propane/kerosene]
6. Try to have at least a week's worth of shelf-stable, easy to prepare food on hand. Rice and beans, oats, canned goods, shit like that. Stuff that doesn't require refrigeration, keeps forever and is easy to prepare - you don't want to be assembling a fucking beef wellington like you're Gordon Ramsay in this shit. Buy more water than you think you'll need. Have a stock of common batteries on hand - AAs, AAAs, 9 volts, maybe even D-cells. Lithium-ion power banks are cheap as shit now and pack quite a punch, they're worth having on hand. Try to charge all of your mission critical shit [phone, laptop, tablet, etc.] before the onset of icing/wind.
At cold enough temps natural gas lines can start to freeze up and shit too so your primary heat source might fail even, ice can also block up your furnace exhaust vent/chimney [if you have natural gas, propane, or fuel oil heating] and either prevent it from working properly, or potentially result in exhaust gases backing up into your house, another great reason to have CO detectors although most modern furnaces won't operate in this condition for that specific reason. Anyway that's my crash course for living halfway comfortably in a bad snowstorm/icestorm, been through a few of them, they still fucking suck even if you're as ready as can be but it makes it tolerable at least. It ain't like a regular storm/derecho where you can just get the hell out of Dodge for a few days if shit's fucked and get a motel room somewhere that isn't a disaster area. Plan on not fucking going anywhere for 2-3 days pretty much, maybe longer, because you very likely will NOT be able to unless you have some Mad Max mobile and tire chains. Don't assume that just because you have a 4x4 that it doesn't apply to you - I'm a county plow truck driver and after every big snow event, I'm yanking Dodge Rams and the like out of the ditch all fucking night because Cleetus wanted to make a beer run and assumed he'd be fine because he's got winter tires and 4Wd. Also make sure your car/truck's fuel tank is topped up and if you have a trickle charger, fucking use it, if all else fails you can always start it up and use your vehicle for heat/to charge your phone or other devices, in a pinch you could sleep there - but make sure your tailpipe isn't obstructed. If your fuel tank is full, if you need to, you can siphon fuel out of the car to put in the generator if it's absolutely necessary. Diesels may benefit from an oil/engine block warmer, too - so that you can actually fire up your rig. Have a good jump-starter, too - car batteries fucking hate cold weather.
If your pipes do freeze and you want to give it a shot at thawing them out - and this won't be an easy task if temps remain very low, but your best bet is a hair dryer on HIGH or a heat gun - heat gun will be the absolute best. If you know where the ice jam is [usually pipes in an exterior wall, or in some cases the exterior pipe which feeds your house] you could also try to boil some bottled water and dump it on there slowly. In any case, be careful - especially with a heat gun, it's really fucking easy to start a fire with them. You can also open the cupboard doors beneath your sinks to help circulate [relatively] warmer air around the pipes.
And if you already have all of this stuff on deck - a generator, power banks, trickle charger for your car battery, kerosene/propane heater, etc. - take the time NOW to make sure that it's functioning properly and ready to go. Don't dick around and wait to yank the generator out of the shed when your kids' bedrooms are 40 degrees Fahrenheit and your wife's got frost in her eyebrows only to find that the cocksucker won't start or there's no oil in it. Do it now, make sure this shit is working BEFORE you need it.
Anyway, good fucking luck Dixiebros - shit sucks.
Last edited:
Grub
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 2, 2021
Huh. Shitty deal. Guess I'll just keep on enjoying that unseasonably warm spring like weather we've been having.
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2020
The worst part of big snows in my area is SUV Superman Syndrome.
Morons think they can drive their SUV 50 mph because its large and has 4 wd, then they're crashing into poles, power transformers and trees everywhere. You should see how many cars and trucks are in ditches early in the storm or the next morning.
Keep in mind that you can place your frozen and refrigerated food outside in the cold if your fridge isn't working.
Moms tend to buy up all the chocolate pudding cups and Lunchables before hurricanes or snow storms. They're gone before the batteries. Gotta keep those kids happy to avoid tantrums when the ipads go down and they're stuck inside bored off their asses.
You can't blame the parents for being realistic. It's hell when Ethan and Olivia won't stop arguing and poking each other. You can't send them outside into the blizzard unless you hate them.
Morons think they can drive their SUV 50 mph because its large and has 4 wd, then they're crashing into poles, power transformers and trees everywhere. You should see how many cars and trucks are in ditches early in the storm or the next morning.
And that doesn't need to be heated by anything electric.
Keep in mind that you can place your frozen and refrigerated food outside in the cold if your fridge isn't working.
Already started here. Get toilet paper now if you're low. Grab salt, a heavy snow shovel and a heavy duty car scraper if you need them.
People who don't even use milk normally will go out and buy a gallon. I don't get it.
Moms tend to buy up all the chocolate pudding cups and Lunchables before hurricanes or snow storms. They're gone before the batteries. Gotta keep those kids happy to avoid tantrums when the ipads go down and they're stuck inside bored off their asses.
You can't blame the parents for being realistic. It's hell when Ethan and Olivia won't stop arguing and poking each other. You can't send them outside into the blizzard unless you hate them.
There was a blizzard in Atlanta years ago where they didn't even presalt the roads. It was traffic Armageddon.
- Joined
- Jul 18, 2017
Looking like Dallas Fort Worth is going to get half an inch to an inch of Ice around rush hour Friday evening. I would say maybe not go to work, or if you do, dont drive a full sized pickup truck 80 MPH on half an inch of ice.
But who am I kidding. Mother nature is going to claim a few bodies right out the gate there.
But who am I kidding. Mother nature is going to claim a few bodies right out the gate there.
- Joined
- Aug 14, 2024
- Joined
- Apr 7, 2022
Im pissed off I keep getting missed with the snow. We’re gonna burn this summer.
My rose bushes are still green….
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2020
Report from the huge local grocery store: Oreo cookies are gone. Still have a few snow shovels, lots of road salt, batteries, toilet paper, etc. Grocery store was ten times as busy as it would usually be at this time.
But Total Oreo Death has occurred. It's the only shelf empty in the whole place.
Also: Saw a middle aged woman headed out the door with 8 bottles of wine. No, she wasn't having a dinner party. She had decent taste in wine for a grocery store purchase.
Semper Fi, Mrs Drunkette.
I was in Houston once when they got a light snow storm and you'd have thought sulfuric acid was falling from the sky the way locals freaked out. It was hilarious.
But Total Oreo Death has occurred. It's the only shelf empty in the whole place.
Also: Saw a middle aged woman headed out the door with 8 bottles of wine. No, she wasn't having a dinner party. She had decent taste in wine for a grocery store purchase.
Semper Fi, Mrs Drunkette.
That's mind blowing. I can't even picture that and I used to live in the upper midwest.
I was in Houston once when they got a light snow storm and you'd have thought sulfuric acid was falling from the sky the way locals freaked out. It was hilarious.
Don't drive a truck like an idiot in bad weather challenge: level impossible. Add 0.15 blood alcohol level for bragging rights.
- Joined
- Dec 16, 2022
You should buy a gas powered emergency heater instead of something electric. They are pretty safe inside, but I would recommend cracking a window for the moisture to escape, and keeping a CO/CO2 detector nearby just to be safe. Make sure your emergency food doesn't need cooking, or also invest in a small gas cooking stove. There's also attachments for cooking stoves that will heat small spaces, but they are a lot sketchier than actual heaters and you do not want pets/kids/retards near them, nor do you want them running without supervision.
Good luck.
Good luck.
REGENDarySumanai
Scraping the arse end of the barrel for these.
Forum Staff
Global Moderator
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Nov 8, 2017
The bread, milk, and toilet paper people are going to be out in droves. I guess it's no better time to try my new balaclava than now. Maybe I should get a third one.
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2022
Also recommended: sleeping bag. Preferably a rectangular one that unzips into an insulated blanket, it'll probably be used more in that form anyway unless actually outside in snow.
Cheap chinesium camping stove and a few gas cartridges, also some sort of metal tea pot or whatever for hot drinks.
- Joined
- Dec 16, 2019
Seriously, part of my job is to assist stranded motorists during the winter [or during the warmer months sometimes too if there is flooding or knocked-over trees due to thunderstorms] and 95% of the time if I'm yanking someone out of the ditch with my rig, it's always SUV Sally or Dodge Ram Dan who think just because they have a 4WD or a crossover that sits higher-up than most other vehicles, they can just open up the throttle and do the speed limit when there's snow/ice on the road. I basically never see anyone in a sedan or a 4-banger in the ditch or with their shit tangled up in a wire fence because it seems like those people have the fucking sense to stay off the fucking roads when they're bad. I stopped to ask one guy in one of those compensator trucks [it's always obvious, a Dodge with an unwieldy lift kit, enough LEDs and chicken lights that it can be seen from low-Earth orbit, NRA/RealTree sticker in the back window and NOTHING in the bed] if he needed help and he insisted he could get himself out and told me I could move along. Alrighty then, that's what I did. Came back that way about 45 minutes later after I finished a county road and the motherfucker was still there and still very much stuck, waved me off. Passed back through toward the end of my shift and there sat his truck - still stuck, he was nowhere to be found, apparently gave up and caught a ride back to town with somebody. None of them ever seem to have an AAA membership either. A lot of the time they act like they're putting me out or something but it's part of my job, sometimes if I'm done with my route and heading back to base I'll give 'em a lift into town if they sign the waiver. It's especially stupid when it's some soccer mom with a carload of kids, putting them in unnecessary danger. No survival instincts at all, no common sense to be found.
It still puzzles me how in the fuck a person can live in a place with real Winter for their entire lifetime - sometimes 40-50 years of driving experience, and they still have absolutely no fucking idea how to drive in snow or when to call it and just stay the fuck at home. At least the Dixiebros have an excuse - this shit is rare. Up here in the north, nobody has an excuse. We've fucking done this before, Maude/Steve, you've been driving since 1968, how in the fuck is eight inches of snow still apocalyptic to your driving skills? Snow isn't a new phenomenon in this state. I remember one neighbor girl had this shitbox Honda Civic on bald tires and she tried for like three hours to get down the street and she made it maybe 50 yards out of her own driveway after we got about three feet of snow dumped on us. I don't have a clue where the fuck she was even trying to go because everything was shut down anyway, but she just kept redlining that cocksucker and spinning her wheels. Sooner or later some dumbfuck with a pickup showed up and he tried to pull her down the street with the thinnest rope you've ever seen, predictably it broke and he got his truck stuck too. People really are morons about this shit, I halfway expected that girl to crack her car's engine block because it was like -24F and she jumped in and started redlining it like there was absolutely nothing going on. There was what they call a 'level 3 road condition' anyway, which are issued by the county sheriff and it basically says only DOT and emergency vehicles/tow trucks ought to be on the road and they will absolutely pull you over if they find you out and about driving.
Same goes for the people who clean out the store shelves every time a snowflake hits the ground, they hit the fucking Walmart like the missiles are about to drop and seldom do I see them stocking up on relevant shit like sidewalk salt/canned goods and rice, it's always junk food and perishables that you'll have to stick out in a snowbank in the yard when your power goes out. That's another useful tip, if it's under 38 degrees outside and your power's out, put the milk and Hot Pockets out in a snowdrift, just make sure the coons don't get into it. I just know all of these dumb behaviors are amplified 100x in the south because people down there don't have to deal with it on a regular basis. Tourists will come up here and have no idea how to dress and end up freezing their asses off, that and they aren't acclimated to it at all. It can be forty degrees out and locals are wandering around in short pants, meanwhile the guy from Alabama's teeth are chattering. Likewise tourists will come up here in Winter after some big fuck-off blizzard and get all buttmad that everything's closed - yep, that's how it goes sometimes up here, the weather just decides to shit on you at random and everything is shut down for a couple days while we try to fucking fix it. Although I will say, nowadays they seem to close school at the drop of a fucking hat. I remember waking up at 7AM when I was a kid and either listening to the local AM station or watching the news footer scroll to see if school was open or if I'd be able to go sledding that day and often being disappointed. They only closed schools back then if some serious shit was going down - three feet of snow capped with ice beneath it, -40 wind chills, or a derecho just blew our balls off and tore half the county apart. Now? "Well it's a little bit chilly and the wind's blowing, looks like we'll have to cancel school! D:", maybe it's because now they can just do that remote learning shit that doesn't work, either that or modern kids/parents are just bitch-made.
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- Joined
- Sep 30, 2021
Atlanta is special in a way that a crackhead can burn down an overpass that has heavy traffic and people still managed to keep things going smooth the entire time it was being rebuilt, but God forbid you get even the slightest bit of snow and ice. There's something in the roads around the Atlanta that releases some form of gas when wet that turns the drivers into dipshits.
Hell, even if it's dry, people still drive like they're qualifying at Talladega. You can be driving 90mph with someone riding your ass in ALL lanes, bumper to bumper, for miles. Atlanta traffic is consistently one sudden stop away from a pileup and it's absolutely fucking miserable to drive in. Every time I've had to go through Atlanta with Ms. Spider, she makes me drive.
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ZsaZsaBinks
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 15, 2022
I just hope we get some precipitation because where I’m at it’s so dry.
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
Blizzard in 2026 is just sad. They've released like 2 games in the past decade and their reputation is seriously in decline.
- Joined
- Sep 15, 2024
i havent actually gotten much snow this year tbh
- Joined
- Jul 18, 2019
That's actually worse because this far south we'll be getting freezing rain and ice which'll destroy the power grid.
People think southrons are scared of a little snow when the bigger issue is that winter storms create the perfect conditions in this latitude for ice accumulation.
- Joined
- Jul 18, 2017
People were already at the local wally world at 7:30 AM this morning. Bread and milk getting raided as is tradition. I just needed some soap though.
Did get 10 gallons of Kerosene though. If I lose power for a week I will be fine.
Did get 10 gallons of Kerosene though. If I lose power for a week I will be fine.
- Joined
- Dec 16, 2019
For real, fuck ice. If God called me up and told me that I had a choice between four feet of snow over a period of three days and a half inch of ice accompanied by sleet in a single day, but I had to choose one, I'd go with the former every single time. When it snows real hard, your home is still a sanctuary and you can dig out on your own time-table, an hour here and an hour there, go back into the house and warm up. When you get ice, there's no digging out, you just have to fucking wait and if ambient temps are cold enough, salt/brine won't even begin to crack the ice and in most cases your house is a dark box that's only marginally above the outdoor air temp unless you have a kerosene heater/wood stove going. If you even try to go out on foot, you're liable to slip and bust your ass and even break your ass-bone at worst. About the only 'cool' thing about ice accretion is that at least it looks neat - all of the trees covered in a thin layer of ice is interesting to look at. That's pretty much it, everything else about it sucks. It's hard for me to determine which is worse: a power outage during Winter or a power outage when Summer is already balls deep. On one hand, unless you're old or feeble, a Summer power outage is unlikely to kill you - unlike the cold, which absolutely can if you don't have any heating sources or thick blankets, but by God, July power outages are so fucking miserable without a generator. Heat index of like 115 degrees Fahrenheit, no air moving through the house at all, you just sit there in the hotbox and sweat absolute sack.
I actually don't even mind shoveling snow, there's something satisfying about it and it's basically a free workout. Sometimes, if I had the time to do so, I'd go check on the little old lady that lived behind me and dig her car out for her. That and moving around keeps you pretty warm. Even when it's like -30F out with wind chills, so long as you layer up you barely even notice so long as you keep moving, sometimes you'll even start fucking sweating. The trick to going out in that sort of temperature is longjohns or thermal underwear, sort of like an old timey unionsuit people used to wear. Get those and add some kind of fleece-lined sweatshirt under your primary winter coat and you'll hardly even notice except where your skin is exposed.
I remember the first time my old lady went out when ambient temps were below zero, she was like "how in the hell do you people live here?" but like I told her, you eventually learn how to dress for it and get acclimated to it. Lowest temps I've personally experienced were a few years ago in, I wanna say 2022 when there was that massive cold snap/pressure drop throughout most of the midwest/eastern U.S, temps went from 50s to -10 in the span of about twelve hours, -45 with wind chill. First time I ever saw frost forming on the inside of my windowpanes and ice around my exterior doorframes. Shit was wild, you go outside in that shit without gloves and it only takes a minute or two for your fingers to go completely numb and probably about five mins to cause moderate frostbite. But fucking no matter where you live minus say California and the Pacific Northwest, the weather is always trying to find unique ways to either kill you or make your life miserable. Some of the more ignorant Euros always go on about "well maybe if you moronic Americans didn't build your houses out of particle board and toothpicks, you wouldn't have to worry about tornadoes!" and they just have no fucking comprehension of how powerful a tornado is. The Joplin tornado in 2011 shifted a nine story, 800,000 square foot hospital building four inches off of its foundation, for fuck's sake.
TL;DR is basically - weather is fucking scary sometimes, shit will fuck you up.