A movie for all the suicidal cripples and trans freaks of the world
Hi, I’m Kahlil Kasir. I’m a painter, cartoonist, and filmmaker. I’m mostly known for my book It Hurts Until It Doesn’t, an autobiographical comic about living with both medical and familial abuse. It was blurbed by Alison Bechdel and Carta Monir, and included in The Comics Journal’s Best Comics of 2022.
I’ve somewhat disappeared for the past yearish, but that is because 1) I am working on a reprint of said book, and 2) this. This is a very big pivot in my work as anyone who’s been following me knows, while dealing with many of the same themes of illness, survival, and self harm. I’ve wanted to make films for a very long time, as filmmaking is a medium that is less disrupted by the ups and downs of living with my disability and is also just purely something I’ve aspired to.
By Time You See Me There Will Be Nothing Left follows Agnes (played by Lucy Conrad), a disabled trans woman and burgeoning serial killer pursuing self annihilation on the outskirts of LA. In a moment of near death, she is saved by Lionel (played by River Starr), an aimless homeless trans man and sex worker. They begin a messy, torrid romance that leaves many bodies in their wake. By Time You See Me is a nihilistic, subversive movie about two people living on the margins finding each other. Agnes and Lionel roam California in a sea of violence, sex, and death.
It’s a deeply personal work about disabled suicide. It’s about what it means to be a forever cripple. It’s about what control you can exert over your body when it betrays you every waking moment. It’s about being trans in a California landscape plagued by both wildfires and politicians who will throw you to fascists in a second. It’s about people who can’t really function in everyday life. It’s about feeling your body rotting all the time. It’s about being desperately and stupidly in love.
This is a movie made very cheaply by and for queers with minimum wage jobs. It’s shot on an old Digital 8 camera, and wears its snuff film influences on its sleeve. Other influences include Philippe Grandrieux, My Own Private Idaho, Gregg Araki's Apocalypse trilogy, Baise Moi, and Lars Von Trier. The budget will be going mostly towards practical effects (mainly gore make up), as well as renting out locations and gas and food for everyone on set. The plan is to finish filming by January, and to have the film fully edited by March. This also precludes any disruption in filming or editing from any health issue (I'm immunocompromised and just disabled in general and this sometimes affects my work).