Chibinekodemyx Japansperging containment thread

[Gay Sex Enjoyer]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=Y9xTdu4_sgs
You can find them as low as $100 but uh...

Into the Gaijin box with you, Adam-kun.

 

[Looney Troons]

That’s the exact video I remember watching a few years ago. All I could remember of it was the guy having to turn on the lights to the unit from the outside, and the below floor storage was basically just access to the foundation.

He did mention some company at the end which specializes in cheap apartments. Maybe Chibi needs to see that video (if it’s still relevant)

 

[the khat quaffer]

I selected the option for no cheese, the person making my hamburger came around the corner and was telling me that the burger came with cheese and asking if I sure that I don't want cheese on it like it was a foreign concept. They put cheese on the burger anyway.

corn (corn is everywhere in Japan)

Tony B said on one of his No Reservations episodes where he went to Japan - RIP Tony - that in one of the ramen alleys he went to, they served corn in the ramen. He made a point of mentioning this. Quote, "freaky! corn! that's not Japanese. freakier still, it's awesome. we seem to take corn with us everywhere we go. it probably came about as a result of post-WW2 era Japan."

Lovely episode, lovely man. It's also how I learned about the Ainu people in Japan, a persecuted minority, similar to Native Americans here.

 

[Lisa Frank Abomination]

There are definitely fully-furnished apartments at or below ¥90,000 (including utilities and internet), possibly a little smaller than he's asking for, available right now in the city Chibi's already living in. I know because I looked it up on probably the only foreigner-pointed rental site that'll consider him on a one-year visa with no prior rental history in Japan. Hell if I'm going to namedrop it where he can find it though. Good luck on the search, Chibi!

Miso ramen with corn is a Hokkaido staple. Highly recommend. Yokohama Iekei ramen is where it's at, though.

 

[Purple_Urkel]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=c5BL4RNFr58


Tony B said on one of his No Reservations episodes where he went to Japan - RIP Tony - that in one of the ramen alleys he went to, they served corn in the ramen. He made a point of mentioning this. Quote, "freaky! corn! that's not Japanese. freakier still, it's awesome. we seem to take corn with us everywhere we go. it probably came about as a result of post-WW2 era Japan."

Lovely episode, lovely man. It's also how I learned about the Ainu people in Japan, a persecuted minority, similar to Native Americans here.

I think some sweet corn would compliment a beef/chicken ramen.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Insightful, thanks Cheebs!
View attachment 7900123
(the rest of the post says: "....Calpiss")

Spoiler: Comment (his one)

View attachment 7900143
YOU SAY KONBINI, LIKE WE SAY KONBIIINI

It's Calpis which is a kind of yogurt drink but it's pronounced as "cow piss".

Chibi thinks he's being super funny.

Do they have those "coffin apartments" in Japan or is it just HK?

They have "capsule hotels" which is where drunken salarymen go to after missing the last train home.

They're actually pretty comfortable but you better get some earplugs because there's a lot of drunken snoring going on.

But those apartments that are subdivided so that six families live in a single one bedroom unit? No. I've never seen one.

Is it true you can't go to onsen as a foreigner? How about hot springs?

It depends. The uproar over this was in Hokkaido when some Russian navy guys showed up to one while they were on leave. They were loud, rowdy and disturbed the locals so the onsens and in the area said, "no gaijin allowed". That's more or less it. In the half-dozen times we've been to one I've never had a problem going in.

Nah, you can get a livable size area for that price, as long as you aren't in a major city. Though I guess "livable" depends on how much space you need.

Found one

No word of a lie there's a place in Oi maybe 20 minute walk from Oimachi station in that price range. It's also closer to Tachigawa station but who's counting? Gotta go with what you can get right? And no I'm not saying where it is but let's just say they're pretty well known and have a two letter name.

 

[Team TERF]

Tony B said on one of his No Reservations episodes where he went to Japan - RIP Tony - that in one of the ramen alleys he went to, they served corn in the ramen. He made a point of mentioning this. Quote, "freaky! corn! that's not Japanese. freakier still, it's awesome. we seem to take corn with us everywhere we go. it probably came about as a result of post-WW2 era Japan."

A Japanese/Asian fusion place nearby that I like serves corn in their ramen. It's not something I actively dislike, but I have asked for it without corn before because it didn't seem authentic (and I didn't think it added much to the dish). The more you know!

 

[the khat quaffer]

I heard that you can, but whatever True & Honest Nihongo is sitting in the onsen will often rudely get up and leave if you dare to get in the water.

"Okay sushi boat , more room for me."

You didn't read the fine print. "Except in Japan where the only option is you take what we give you".

And yeah, that's Japan in a nutshell. Either you go with it and accept that you will never get what you truly need or you drive yourself nuts trying to fight against the ocean.

Might be an Asian thing in general.

Couple foreigners I worked with were utterly shocked when I stood my ground against a employee at whataburger when he fucked up our order. I wasn't rude/insulting, just firm but polite. (People shitting on service workers is a massive pet peeve of mine.) Guy tried to get off on some "our fryers only run for a few seconds" (nigger what?) and was half a fag, but still. I asked for fries well done, not soggy and limp. Most people that go to a fast food aren't interested in being health conscious. Just fry them well.

Anyways, my Asian colleagues were utterly flabbergasted that you can demand your order be made right and won't bend over and take something sub-par, or that you can make requests on someone older than you.

 

[Lisa Frank Abomination]

It's hard to get substitutions, sure, but damn if what you order isn't going to come out exactly like the picture on the menu almost 100% of the time. I find the exception was delivery apps. At least around where I was, you were definitely more likely to get something fucked up if you used UberEats. Maybe they figured once it left the store with the driver it was no longer their problem.

The big one a lot of foreigners can't wrap their heads around is how they treat allergies. Restaurants are like, we listed the allergy info so we're not liable if you eat it, no we won't change it. Order something else. Some British bitch I worked with had the gall to complain that a local joint served her gyoza that contained soy sauce even though she told them she was allergic to soy - she was like "I don't get how they don't understand that soy means tofu and soy sauce and soy beans!!!" Girl, they knew, they just did not give a fuck lmao they probably hoped you'd die so you never went back.

(As much as I love chatting shit about Japan, I really hope Chibi does something soon. Where are the big Japanese magical samurai adventures we were promised?)

 

[Ultraman Orb Dark]

That's what 99% of autism is these days. Being raised by parents who never said no.

I know a few autistic people who can hold down a job. Chibi's just an idiot.

Our boi cheebz is stuggling...

View attachment 7887060

Better get ready to donate a lot of sperm and plasma.

I think reality is setting in that Japan isn't the promised land of bing bing wahoo.

Maybe he thought he'd become a superhero or something anime-related his first week there?

Japan is also going through a streak of anti-immigration due to some tards with a camera and such making headlines

I think I saw something about a Japanese-Fillipina actress in Super Sentai being the victim of a harrassment campaign partially motivated by xenophobia.

View attachment 7891514

my nigga is RICH BISH

View attachment 7891525

His mom will sigh, pick up the phone, and call the Japanese government, the Japanese AT&T, the best Japanese bank, and a Japanese landlord, then wire him the money she gets from refinancing her mortgage a second time. She will Karen so hard that everything will fall into place for Chibi.

What I imagine Mama Cheebs does to get money for her son:

I can't wait until his melty over not being able to control a classroom of children speaking a language he doesn't understand. Maybe he's still doing some training or something before actually starting.

"Why are none of the female students flirting with me?!"

I don't think you understand how strong the autism is in Japan. You can't even substitute items on a restaurant menu because it goes against the process that is set up. If you go into a restaurant and ask them to change an item on the menu, like saying that you don't want corn (corn is everywhere in Japan) and would rather have extra broccoli or whatever, they will look at you like you just walked off a spaceship and tell you no. If someone starts being a Karen about something, the clerk or whomever will just short circuit and keep repeating that they can't do it because its against policy.

This thread makes me think Japan should be an autistic utopia for the ones who like rigid structure.

Wow, they sound really anal. What, are they fascis--oh right.

They have "capsule hotels" which is where drunken salarymen go to after missing the last train home.

They're actually pretty comfortable but you better get some earplugs because there's a lot of drunken snoring going on.

But those apartments that are subdivided so that six families live in a single one bedroom unit? No. I've never seen one.

Didn't the Clone Troopers sleep in a place like that?

 

[Purple_Urkel]

Maybe he thought he'd become a superhero or something anime-related his first week there?

He totally thought it would be his own personal anime, someone discovers him on the street and he's the chosen one. Bing Bing Wahoo Warrior!

 

[Gay Sex Enjoyer]

Didn't the Clone Troopers sleep in a place like that?

Oh no clones slept in regular military bunks. It does have a Kamino pod vibe going on though, doesn't it?

 

[Ghostse]

I can't wait until his melty over not being able to control a classroom of children speaking a language he doesn't understand. Maybe he's still doing some training or something before actually starting.

eikaiwas teach english via immersion, theyre forbidden from speaking any japanese to the students. hes paid to stand there and be a clown talking americanese and if no one is paying attention he cant do shit

His "english teaching job" is basically going to be a mascot for kids in (western) grades 8th and below, more likely grades 1 - 5th. He will not be left unsupervised with the children at any time, and as @Lapsus of the bepsus points out, his piss-poor Nipponese helps his cause.

The idea is less that he teaches the children anything and more that he is a combination Mascot/Class Pet and no-accent source of words for the children to hopefully autistically memorize. The actual teacher runs the class and will basically prompt Cheebs to chirp up at the right times. The most instructing he will do is saying words slowly and carefully as the rest of the class repeats them with no idea what they're saying. Sometimes they will play games with the younger kids that require them to sound out/repeat english words. Aka LOTS of playing Hangman.
But mostly he's just there to entertain the kids/let them gawk at him and let the school talk about their "English program with native speakers"

If he's got any skill what so ever, he will moonlight at Private Cram Schools for extrascratch. Some of these schools will give him a handler, but most will expect that you can handle the class yourself AND you need to have at least a base academic understanding of english and to teach it, not just the ability to speak it like JET. The next down the chain is "foreign language institutes" (I forget the proper term) where you are paid to have 1 on 1 or very small groups, where you basically just talk and correct/critique their speaking.

One of the expats who had graduated from mascot-level JET talked about how in the early days of the aughts he was shocked by how easy it was for him to get dates and get all these girls to talk to him for hours and they seemed very interested in what he had to say, but then he'd end up disappointed when they'd never lead to anything except more cafe dates. He later realized that he was being used for English conversation training, and that he needed to suggest they go somewhere more intimate than the cafe* within about 30 minutes if there was any chemistry, because if they refused it was almost certain they were wasting his time to get free english lessons.

*By that I mean a movie, a ballgame, walk in the park - couple activities, something you could not explain to a boyfriend. Not (necessarily) the love hotel.

I was a manager at one of the big eikaiwas a couple years ago. I hope Chibi's working there, because we had an employee record page for every teacher where the Japanese front desk staff (who basically ran day-to-day operations for each individual school) and management would shitpost about terrible instructors, and I know the guy who took my position would be willing to share any funny news that pops up.

I miss reading those logs, man, they were a treasure trove of delicious lolcow content that I could read through and still pretend to be doing my job.

Any particularly good stories?

So much for Burger King's slogan "Have it your way"
View attachment 7899367

The Burger fears the Samurai.

Insightful, thanks Cheebs!
View attachment 7900123
(the rest of the post says: "....Calpiss")

Spoiler: Comment (his one)

View attachment 7900143
YOU SAY KONBINI, LIKE WE SAY KONBIIINI

I am going to say Lemon Sour (citrus malt drink) is pretty damn good tho.

What is that drink and did he buy it purely because theres an anime girl on the label?

Its Calpis. It is a carbonated lactose (Milk but might not be strictly speaking dairy) drink popular in japan. Its a version of/similar to Kefir. There are a variety of fruit flavors. I was not a huge fan, it was like....if you added a little carbonation to watered down and sweetened milk. Its not disgusting, but not something I get at the Asian market.

It's hard to get substitutions, sure, but damn if what you order isn't going to come out exactly like the picture on the menu almost 100% of the time.

This 100%. It will look like the menu picture. I never had anything (from a restaurant) that wasn't tasty as fuck. Well, I guess maybe some izakaya snacks but that's because I'm not big on dried squid.

View attachment 7902215
It depends. The uproar over this was in Hokkaido when some Russian navy guys showed up to one while they were on leave. They were loud, rowdy and disturbed the locals so the onsens and in the area said, "no gaijin allowed". That's more or less it. In the half-dozen times we've been to one I've never had a problem going in.
[/QUOTE]

Is it true you can't go to onsen as a foreigner? How about hot springs?

Granted this years ago but the rule of thumb for Onsen, bars, and pinkbox was:
"If the sign says 'No Foreigner' it just means don't act like an obnoxious Foreigner or they will kick you out. Also that the staff probably don't speak english so hopefully you don't need anything explained".
Some of the super traditional places will bar round-eyes, but you are unlikely to see that in Tokyoko and adjacent - there is just too many gaijin, and the locals are accustomed to their roun-eyed ways, to bar them. Its a little more dicey if you go away from the major cities.

Teacher friend, who went to some rural areas, would just by default when he went to a new district have the principal/super intendant/the top administrator "show him around" to the local hangouts. That is, the Principal usually was well connected/powerful and respected locally, so by going around with the new gaijin to the local bars and baths the message would get out fairly quickly "Don't treat the round-eye like a gaijin"

The point was Chibi thinks he can just jump to an IT position. He can't. First of all his visa won't allow him. Secondly he has literally zero experience in the field. Chibi is literally fucked if he loses this "teaching" job.

Now, if Cheebs was actually skilled and was going to work for a reputable company, the visa wouldn't be a problem. If you are skilled and pass the culture fit, they will move whatever mountains are needed to get you in, and any large and reputable firm will have a few MPs on payroll.
Note the problem there where I said "Skilled". They aren't going to do that for a phone monkey, you'd need to have actual system skills.
Its possible he could find some random small japanese company that needs an english speaker for foreign tech support, but they won't have the juice to fix his visa problems.

I say that, and now watch Cheebs find some v-tumor model rigging company that just happens to be run by the new PM's cousin. Cheebs then spends the rest of his days in japan, up to his neck in a constant stream of BPD v-tuber pussy.

He'll be lucky to make it a full year, but no matter how long he's there he's never going to be able to have a single interaction for the entire rest of his life where he doesn't find a way to bring up the fact that he lived in Japan. That will be the real damage done.

yup. This will be the long term legacy of the Japan arc. that and having his kidney stolen.

 

[Quizibo]

There are definitely fully-furnished apartments at or below ¥90,000 (including utilities and internet), possibly a little smaller than he's asking for, available right now in the city Chibi's already living in. I know because I looked it up on probably the only foreigner-pointed rental site that'll consider him on a one-year visa with no prior rental history in Japan. Hell if I'm going to namedrop it where he can find it though. Good luck on the search, Chibi!

Miso ramen with corn is a Hokkaido staple. Highly recommend. Yokohama Iekei ramen is where it's at, though.

Well, if you noticed the pattern, Chibi wants other people to do the work for him. Which is why he posted his requirements on a facebook group and hopes other people will do the legwork for his apartment. I am sure if he just did a google search, the results would pop up for him in less than a second and he could make the appointment to meet with the people. However, he fucked himself over because he may not have a bank account yet with enough money in it to cover key cost, fees, and rent; his Japanese is shit, and he started work (while working US hours for the telemarketing job) so he has limited time to even go out and check the apartments. Also, I believe its the second surge now for apartment hunting new company employees and transfers.

 

[Whaler]

You can find them as low as $100 but uh...

It really depends on which area of Japan you're in, and where abouts in the area you're looking for. Places will be cheaper away from the bigger cities, and even cheaper away from things like major like train stations and what not.

How long before Chibi goes insane from having no friends, a miserable job, and a tiny box to live in?

Probably a long time because that's how he was living in America.

No word of a lie there's a place in Oi maybe 20 minute walk from Oimachi station in that price range. It's also closer to Tachigawa station but who's counting? Gotta go with what you can get right? And no I'm not saying where it is but let's just say they're pretty well known and have a two letter name.

Yeah, I don't know why Cheebs is so insistent on everybody else doing this shit for him.

"our fryers only run for a few seconds" (nigger what?)

It's actually true. Almost every place like McDonalds, Burger King, and Wendys have all their equipment (grills and fryers) running on a timer that does everything for you so everything comes out cooked the same. It's literal slop.

I am going to say Lemon Sour (citrus malt drink) is pretty damn good tho.

I'll admit it, it was very delicious.

 

[Oliver Onions]

Looks like he's started the hunt for his sex dungeon apartment.

>Prefer low initial cost and/or furnished already

Adam, my dude, do you really think you're in the position to be choosy? You'll take the empty roachbox and be happy or your ass is on the street.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Yeah, I don't know why Cheebs is so insistent on everybody else doing this shit for him.

It's because he's a retard that expects others to do the heavy lifting for him.

Seriously this took me not even 30 seconds to find it. The difference is I knew what I was looking for. But he'd need to buy his own appliances if he wanted to live there.

I'll admit it, it was very delicious.

Sounds interesting actually. I always liked trying new flavors of chu-hi and this one with the real lemon slice looks like it would be a blast to try.