Democracy Dictatorship Index

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Black Man Underwear

Suspenders chaffing zipper tit scars
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Jul 4, 2022
The Democracy Dictatorship Index ranks countries from 1-10, 1 being a dictatorship and 10 being a perfect democracy.

I'd like to know the alternate reality where Germany, a country that jails people for possessing uncensored copies of video games, ranks as a "full democracy" with a score of 8.73. Japan, still effectively a one party state in permanent economic and ideological limbo has a score of 8.48.

Britain, an unlivable shithole where you can be arrested for possessing butter knives and given jail time for tweets, and where police actively aid rape gangs, is also a "full democracy" at 8.34.

America, a country with a stereotype of independence, freedom, and trouble with authority ranks as a 7.85 "flawed democracy" along countries like South Korea, where every single president goes to prison.

Brazil, a country that tried to imprison a feminist for 25 years for calling a man a man, ranks only one tier lower than America at 6.49.

Somehow North Korea, a country where the leader is literally god and all other religion is illegal, ranks above Myanmar, a simple military dictatorship.

Assadist Syria, a hereditary secular multi-party dictatorship with admittedly mostly controlled elections ranks below titans of democracy like Haiti, China, Russia, Eritrea, Cuba, and Saudi Arabia. Some of those countries you can't even leave because it's illegal, and Eritrea is known as Africa's North Korea.

In what world does South Africa, a nation built on executing white people and taking their shit, rank as a better democracy than Croatia, Serbia, and Bulgaria?

How is India, a country where religious lynchings are daily occurrences, in close competition with Italy and ranking above Slovakia?

How is Mauritius, a random nigger island where half of the parties have "Militant" in their name a better democracy than the United States, the country that arguably invented modern democracy?

Fucking astonishing logic. I totally trust this system.
 
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When "democracy" is treated as the yardstick, are you really surprised to get such results? It's a scoreboard for how faithfully a state performs its rituals, regardless of whether it leaves people alone

In Germany you will be jailed for speech and the government still "scores high" because the metric doesn't care if laws violate consent, because it only cares if the laws were passed in the approved way. North Korea can outscore other regimes because the index is grading the formal structure on paper instead of the reality of coercion on the ground

If you use freedom as the standard, then the results will always look astonishing. But they're actually perfectly consistent with the premise of measuring the manners of the master instead...
When "democracy" is treated as the yardstick, are you really surprised to get such results? It's a scoreboard for how faithfully a state performs its rituals, regardless of whether it leaves people alone

In Germany you will be jailed for speech and the government still "scores high" because the metric doesn't care if laws violate consent, because it only cares if the laws were passed in the approved way. North Korea can outscore other regimes because the index is grading the formal structure on paper instead of the reality of coercion on the ground

If you use freedom as the standard, then the results will always look astonishing. But they're actually perfectly consistent with the premise of measuring the manners of the master instead of measuring the condition of the slaves
 
Solution
When "democracy" is treated as the yardstick, are you really surprised to get such results? It's a scoreboard for how faithfully a state performs its rituals, regardless of whether it leaves people alone

In Germany you will be jailed for speech and the government still "scores high" because the metric doesn't care if laws violate consent, because it only cares if the laws were passed in the approved way. North Korea can outscore other regimes because the index is grading the formal structure on paper instead of the reality of coercion on the ground

If you use freedom as the standard, then the results will always look astonishing. But they're actually perfectly consistent with the premise of measuring the manners of the master instead of measuring the condition of the slaves
So we're grading them on bullshit. Nice.
 
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