Science Tarantula Species With Penis That Dwarfs Its Body Discovered By Stunned Scientists

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Tarantula Species With Penis That Dwarfs Its Body Discovered By Stunned Scientists​

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Scientists have stumbled upon four new species of tarantulas whose males have such outrageously long genitals that they had to invent an entirely new genus to classify them: Satyrex, named after the mythological satyr—half-man, half-goat, all libido—and the Latin word for king, rex. The males of the newfound species boast palps (spider sperm-delivery appendages) that stretch up to four times the length of their upper bodies and rival their legs in size. Most species top out with palps twice the length of their head and thorax combined. But in Satyrex ferox, the largest and fiercest of the bunch, the male’s palps clock in at a full 2 inches—nearly half its leg span. Researchers believe these exaggerated organs evolved as a survival tactic, keeping males at a safer distance from their famously cannibalistic mates. Satyrex arabicus was found in Saudi Arabia, Satyrex ferox in Yemen and Oman, and Satyrex somalicus and Satyrex speciosus in Somaliland. The spiders live in rocky crevices. “At least in tarantula taxonomy, it seems that size really does matter,” said Alireza Zamani, the study’s lead author and an arachnologist at the University of Turku in Finland.
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Eight arms to hold you tight, and a dick that can rival that of some of the cows on here.

What's not to like?
 
Palps aren't penises, are they? Aren't they an extra set of arms down by your dick
No. Palps, shortened from pedipalps, are heavily modified legs, hence ped - latin root for foot. Pedipalps have adapted for all kinds of shit across chelicerates (spiders and their close relatives), having adapted to be used for prey capture, sensory use, sperm transfer, mating displays, and probably a bunch of other stuff I haven't yet read about. You just take those front legs and adapt them to do what you need when you already have eight fully functional legs to scurry on.

Also, they're the leggy bits at the front of the spider, not the ass end. Spiders deliver sperm sacs face first.
 
No. Palps, shortened from pedipalps, are heavily modified legs, hence ped - latin root for foot. Pedipalps have adapted for all kinds of shit across chelicerates (spiders and their close relatives), having adapted to be used for prey capture, sensory use, sperm transfer, mating displays, and probably a bunch of other stuff I haven't yet read about. You just take those front legs and adapt them to do what you need when you already have eight fully functional legs to scurry on.

Also, they're the leggy bits at the front of the spider, not the ass end. Spiders deliver sperm sacs face first.
So, in short, the retard that wrote the article is mistaking the spider's arms for their dick? :story:
 
So, in short, the retard that wrote the article is mistaking the spider's arms for their dick? :story:
"It delivers sperm, therefore I can call the organ a penis! :smug: Actually explaining basic spider physiology to my readers to inform them might require me to do basic research, could you imagine?!?"

Journos are scientifically illiterate mongs, more at 11!
 
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