💀 Horrorcow Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta / "u/Early-Leopard-8351" - Polysubstance abuser, child doser, dog killer. "Lawtube pope" turned zesty Dabbleverse Redditor streamer. Swinger "whitebread ass nigga" who snuffs animals and visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold. Still not over his ex Aaron. Wife's bod worth $50.

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Luna's expiration date is?

  • <1 year

    Votes: 158 22.6%

  • Around 2 years

    Votes: 278 39.8%

  • 3-5 years

    Votes: 94 13.4%

  • As long as a pug lives, Karen farmer.

    Votes: 169 24.2%
  • Total voters
    699
Golden Boy said:
He is incredibly strung out, it's surreal to watch.
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Nigga's eyes so squinty he looks Chinese
Screenshot_20250613-161156.webp

Maybe making the stream a 5 hour nothing burger that ended at 1 am Nick's time had some benefits

He probably was tense throughout the whole thing waiting for the big drop and then got pissed once it was revealed there was nothing and it wasted his time and was too mad to sleep
 
PrestonHolt said:
do you really think it will take Nick this long to do nitrous?
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I am being conservative. I know he's pretending to do lawyer shit, and he hates it, so I would put absolutely zero stock in him holding to his decision not to talk about any of what happened last night.

Also, since I'm Nostradamus, I want you all to know he'll end the stream with a Kurt cooking video. You heard it here first!
 
Captain Manning said:
I am being conservative. I know he's pretending to do lawyer shit, and he hates it, so I would put absolutely zero stock in him holding to his decision not to talk about any of what happened last night.

Also, since I'm Nostradamus, I want you all to know he'll end the stream with a Kurt cooking video. You heard it here first!
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Optimistic he can wait that long to play it
 
${Sandy} said:
I had testicular torsion before so looking at this caused me genuine physical pain.
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Until Rackets started talking about them, I figured they were just some old MADTV sketch that never made it to air. I was shocked to find out the they're an actual real thing... And people say sex and porn addiction isn't a thing.
Stuffing your balls into something so you can keep chasing a coom is textbook junkie behavior.
The Balldo to child drugging pipeline needs to be studied.
 
Unintelligence Score said:
I don't know how to feel about this, Kiwisisters. But it's looking to me like June is going to be a FLAWLESS VICTORY MONTH for Nick Rekieta. Let's tally up how things are going for him this month:
  • Kandiyohi County court status: CUCKED and DISGRACED by Nick Rekieta every stream WITHOUT CONSEQUENCES
  • Probation rules: IGNORED WITHOUT CONSEQUENCES
  • Cocaine status: ENTIRELY SNORTED
  • Galaxy Gas status: COMPLETELY HUFFED
  • Church Community status: DISGRACED by PRUDE revelations
  • Montagraph status: DEFAMED WITHOUT (serious) CONSEQUENCES, legal fund still missing over 80% of its goal.
  • Aaron status: SILENCED and BANKRUPTED after losing his revenge porn case and being forced to fork over an entire KNU
  • Body Cam Footage publication status: DENIED and BALLDOWASHED POST HASTE
  • Keanu status: GOODWILL LOST after hosting the SNOOZEFEST NOTHINGBURGER STREAM with Gabe Hoffman
  • Israel status: DIPLOMATIC CRISIS after Gabe Hoffman's role hyping what turned out to be the SNOOZEFEST NOTHINGBURGER STREAM with Keanu
  • Kiwi Farms status: BLUEBALLED by SNOOZEFEST NOTHINGBURGER STREAM, DISGRACED as a BUNCH OF FUCKING NERDS
  • Joshua Moon status: MISSING, EXPOSED AS A BRONY BY OUR NEW LORD CARDPOSTING
  • Disagreeable side hoe April status: DISCARDED WITHOUT CONSEQUENCES
  • Disagreeable Wife status: BATTERED and MONETIZED
  • Disagreeable Son status: CHOKESLAMMED ONTO A FUCKING WALL
Am I missing anything here?

You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like:
View attachment 7497352
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But at the end of the day he is still Nicholas Robert rekieta, the balldo man. And if I were him, I would also huff so much nitrous that the brain damage would make me forget what a failure I was straight out of the womb and the disgust I harbor for my parents that made me this way.
 
Rodeo Roadrunner said:
I'm not gonna make a long complaining post about infighting in this thread. I will just say that for all the complaining about Gabe and Keanu not delivering content, there were almost 100 PAGES posted in this thread complaining about no content, ie 100 pages of fucking nothing. I didn't watch the Keanu stream, because I have better things to do than watch her. I also knew that the content would not be as good as Nick admitting that he choke-slams his son in the chiropractor's office. However, I wasn't going to be glued to this thread making useless posts complaining about it.

I also see no one clipped any part of the stream, not even the part about the Kayla shower incident, so I did the work myself and clipped it, just so my post would actually contain some content and not be fucking useless spam like the last 50 pages of nothing.

kayla headwound.mp4
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I did not watch the stream or read the thread because I expected it to be another attention seeking nothingburger.

I am disappointed that it proved to be that way, but why should anyone expect different from Keanu and Gabe who both accidentally stumbled into a W once upon a time?

Nick still remains the same degenerate retard who needs to drive his car into a tree, but Gabe behaved like a mentally retarded Twitter alog and not like a "journalist" at all.

[EDIT] I take that back about Gabe not behaving like a journalist, he behaved EXACTLY like any random journalist does in 2025. He made the shit up and his sources were crackpipes.
 
River possum said:
But at the end of the day he is still Nicholas Robert rekieta, the balldo man. And if I were him, I would also huff so much nitrous that the brain damage would make me forget what a failure I was straight out of the womb and the disgust I harbor for my parents that made me this way.
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Balldo man, lmao!

Let’s make a pact fellow Kiwis.

If we ever run into Rekieta in public, we’re going to stop him and say: “Hey you look familiar?!”

And right as he’s about to launch into a cocky “Yeah. You might have seen me during the Depp trial!” We say: “YOURE THE BALLDO MAN!” And watch all the light disappear from his eyes.
 
Nick :really: I have no empathy for this and that, him and her. Sorry Nick, that's not how empathy works. You either have it or don't. You don't pick and choose toward who you have or don't have it. That's sympathy. Empathy is involuntary and beyond reason and/or value judgement, sympathy is discerning, it's cognitive and involves value judgement.
 
Fapcop said:
If we ever run into Rekieta in public, we’re going to stop him and say: “Hey you look familiar?!”
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If you ever run into Rekieta in public you should chokeslam him through the nearest coffee table to rightfully stake your claim as champion of the Sektur. His reign must come to an end!
 
Fapcop said:
Balldo man, lmao!

Let’s make a pact fellow Kiwis.

If we ever run into Rekieta in public, we’re going to stop him and say: “Hey you look familiar?!”

And right as he’s about to launch into a cocky “Yeah. You might have seen me during the Depp trial!” We say: “YOURE THE BALLDO MAN!” And watch all the light disappear from his eyes.
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To the tune of the Spider-Man themesong:
Balldo-man, Balldo-man
Does whatever a faggot can!
Snorts a line, any size
Huffs gas to get high
Look out!
Here comes the Balldo-man

Is he straight? Listen, bud:
Thinks only of Aaron's wood
Can he swing with his wife?
Yes and fucked his entire life
Hey there
There goes the Balldo-Man
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Fapcop said:
Balldo man, lmao!

Let’s make a pact fellow Kiwis.

If we ever run into Rekieta in public, we’re going to stop him and say: “Hey you look familiar?!”

And right as he’s about to launch into a cocky “Yeah. You might have seen me during the Depp trial!” We say: “YOURE THE BALLDO MAN!” And watch all the light disappear from his eyes.
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My existing plan is to say Hey! ... but then "You let your 8 year old get into your cocaine!"
 
${Sandy} said:
I am actually getting fucking ptsd flash backs. My balls fucking ache and I feel like I'm about to puke the more I look at that picture. God damn, Rekieta must not have any feeling down there.

Im fucking dry heaving. I need to go lay down.
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He's probably numbed his balls and micro by constantly gooning to disgusting porn, and what that didn't finish, the cocaine and whiskey did. Impotent Balldo cuck.
 
AnOminous said:
He's probably numbed his balls and micro by constantly gooning to disgusting porn, and what that didn't finish, the cocaine and whiskey did. Impotent Balldo cuck.
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Oh God. What about the whippets? If they are turning his fingers blue, I can't imagine what they're doing for other....appendages. Literal blue balls.
 
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