💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Only Jack would love this. The wet brain actually loved his own post about fast food hamburgers.

Made me think of The Simpsons.

"I lived off Whoppers growing up, did you?"
"I had home cooked meals with my family."

 

[Slavic Patronym]

It's not surprising to hear he's been burying his tears in sesame buns for the last 50+ years:

• Eating ultra-processed foods tied to cognitive decline (Harvard Health)
• Ultra-processed foods – like fast food – may contribute to cognitive decline (Center for Cognitive Aging & Memory at UF)
• "A link may even exist between fast food, processed food, commercial baked goods, and sweets and destruction of brain cell and a lowering of intelligence." (National Library of Medicine)

 

[myhairisonfire]

I'm drunk and not cropping at this moment.

Only Jack would love this. The wet brain actually loved his own post about fast food hamburgers.


My goodness. View attachment 7322062

She's in to you, bro!

 

[Doctor of Autism]

Jack going schizo acting like he's an expert on youtube




Random sperging about illegal immigrants

 

[semitooth]

Jack going schizo acting like he's an expert on youtube

View attachment 7323375

out of context this is unironically one of the funniest things jack has ever posted

 

[Super Hans v2]

Jack going schizo acting like he's an expert on youtube

I think a genius writer wouldn't have used the singular 'a' with plural nouns.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

View attachment 7323677
out of context this is unironically one of the funniest things jack has ever posted

I genuinely don't know whether that was a stock image Jack found or AI generated (of either a random guy or making the AI make him look more handsome)

 

[p1138]

In a world where Jack was a little more succesful, he would have collabed with Cathy Mitchell. If only he sold more Nu Wave cookers or whatever they were called.

Nah, you see the problem is that even when he kept getting repeated chances in life he managed to fuck up every single one of them entirely because he's a shit human being. That west texas investors club thing where he didn't cook his own food at a bbq cook-off and made the show people do it so they could at least have something to fucking film.

Cathy Mitchell could have been a complete cunt off camera for all I know, however she's at least charismatic in the commercials. Fatty can't do that.

They're just so nasty, 10 extra minutes is all one would need for something more edible. It really can't get any worse than these one-pot-slop meals.
Oh wait.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=J1lZ44dQYmMI guess I proved myself wrong.
Is this better or worse than Scalfatty's lazy man recipes? I honestly don't know.

To quote her in the commercial "it's like coloring, with food!" as in a children's coloring book. Hilariously it could have been marketed as a children's product showing the real measurements then having a visual representation, include safety warnings about handling knives and the oven with parents and shit, and probably would have done better. But instead they targeted completely retarded people. They even showed a parent working with a kid in the commercial but only glossed over that instead of making it the selling point. I'm pretty sure the book never even existing as a buyable product, considering hardly anyone discusses it and it seems like too much of a 2008 era shitpost from collegehumor

 

[Puggers]

Fatass can't even be bothered to get up and take a photo outside. Just posting a screenshot from his ring camera.

Also, that porch is fuck ugly.

 

[The Stranger]

Also, that porch is fuck ugly.

Nothing more appealing and welcoming than a cold, bare concrete slab in the front of your house.

 

[myhairisonfire]

View attachment 7325063

Fatass can't even be bothered to get up and take a photo outside. Just posting a screenshot from his ring camera.

Also, that porch is fuck ugly.

This is some Wall-E tier shit.

"Looks like a beautiful day out there! Praise God!" *turns back to giant screen playing Blues Clues*

 

[Shartavius]

Fatass can't even be bothered to get up and take a photo outside. Just posting a screenshot from his ring camera.

Remember: Even though Jack compulsively buys shit with his wife's credit card and has it Amazon Prime'd onto that very slab greeting visitors to their pole barn Groverhaus, he complains that UPS drivers should be mandated to put the packages inside his house for him; because he can't get his wheelchair over the threshold, and has to reach out with a cane or grabber to try to turn the boxes left on that "porch" over until they fall through the front door. That way, he can close the door, scoot back to his segregated section of the couch draped with boom boom blankets, and yell at Hope to gnaw open the boxes for him.

 

[Whaler]

Nothing more appealing and welcoming than a cold, bare concrete slab in the front of your house.

He could easily get a waterproof rug from Amazon and have somebody slap it on that porch for him to give it some kind of life and color. I guess since Jack ever hangs around out there he can't be bothered to make it look nice.

 

[densedance]

Says the fat cunt that uses AI generated Pictures as Thumbnails for his food creations that do not even recognize whatever he's cooking in the video at all.

 

[p1138]

Says the fat cunt that uses AI generated Pictures as Thumbnails for his food creations that do not even recognize whatever he's cooking in the video at all.

View attachment 7325866

So Fatty really thinks that blurred thumbnails will make people think things are sexual, rather than just having a pair of tits in an un-blurred thumbnail? Or does Fatty just not realize the thumbnail isn't an example of how everyone else normally sees T&A since his eyes are all fucked up?

Fatass can't even be bothered to get up and take a photo outside. Just posting a screenshot from his ring camera.

That is some peak fucking laziness. Could be scooted himself over to a window, or even the door and just opened it.

 

[VenomPlug]

View attachment 7325063

Fatass can't even be bothered to get up and take a photo outside. Just posting a screenshot from his ring camera.

Also, that porch is fuck ugly.

Truly amazing fatty. Crooked rails, stairs he can't even reach in his current state, what's with that center pillar with holes and some sign on it? Loving all the empty space with shit just doing whatever because fatties are too obese and too disabled to maintain it. Picture is such a low res, reminds me my old Nokia i had when was a kid.

 

[Enig]

Truly amazing fatty. Crooked rails, stairs he can't even reach in his current state, what's with that center pillar with holes and some sign on it? Loving all the empty space with shit just doing whatever because fatties are too obese and too disabled to maintain it. Picture is such a low res, reminds me my old Nokia i had when was a kid.

They have an outdoor temperature gauge on the pillar, one that is too wide for the pillar to begin with. Also, why are the railings attached to the pillars only at the top by a single horizontal beam, why are the lower horizontal supports cut off entirely?

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

Truly amazing fatty. Crooked rails, stairs he can't even reach in his current state, what's with that center pillar with holes and some sign on it? Loving all the empty space with shit just doing whatever because fatties are too obese and too disabled to maintain it. Picture is such a low res, reminds me my old Nokia i had when was a kid.

They have an outdoor temperature gauge on the pillar, one that is too wide for the pillar to begin with. Also, why are the railings attached to the pillars only at the top by a single horizontal beam, why are the lower horizontal supports cut off entirely?

It's because they had a shit house built for how Jack used to be and not how he is now.

 

[I am Jack's dead arm]

So Fatty really thinks that blurred thumbnails will make people think things are sexual, rather than just having a pair of tits in an un-blurred thumbnail? Or does Fatty just not realize the thumbnail isn't an example of how everyone else normally sees T&A since his eyes are all fucked up?

That is some peak fucking laziness. Could be scooted himself over to a window, or even the door and just opened it.

Nah, he didn't get up. He's mentioned how it takes "several minutes" to get to the door to let Hope in/out.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

Says the fat cunt that uses AI generated Pictures as Thumbnails for his food creations that do not even recognize whatever he's cooking in the video at all.

View attachment 7325866

Fatty does know that people can see tits intentionally any time they want, right? Youtube creators don't have to use sex to sell because if people wanna see tits, they can find them on the internet anytime they want