I decided to start dating again about a month ago, and honestly? I’m already feeling burnt out. I’ve met and talked to a lot of girls lately, and every time I finally feel a real vibe, like I actually want to take the next step and ask someone out, I get hit with the same thing:
“Just so you know, I’m poly. I have a partner… or three.”
And it sucks.
I’ve tried polyamory before. I gave it a real shot. And I just… didn’t enjoy it. It didn’t work for me, emotionally or mentally. I know myself enough now to be sure of that.
I see posts all the time, on Reddit, in Discord servers. where poly girls talk about finding the loves of their life and building these sweet little “tribes.” And while part of me is a bit envious of how happy they seem, I also know deep down that’s not what I want. I just want one person. One partner. Someone I can give my full attention, time, and energy to without splitting myself a dozen different ways. I don’t have a huge social battery. I’m not built for constantly navigating complex relationship dynamics. I want something quiet, focused,
intentional.
But I swear, every trans lesbian I meet is poly. Every single one.
Where are the monogamous girls? Where are the ones like me?
It’s starting to feel like I’m exhausting all my options, and it’s just… disheartening. I’m tired. I’m lonely. And I don’t want to settle, but I also don’t want to keep running in circles hoping someone magically shows up.
Just needed to get this off my chest. I’m so scared that if this keeps going, my fate really is just gonna be: old single lesbian with cats. And while I
love cats… that’s not the future I dreamed about.