Stella Sacco
1h
I get a lot of women who recently started their transition telling me it’s overwhelming to try to learn how to beautify/style themselves. And that’s true! Cis girls get to absorb ambient knowledge of this stuff growing up. Here’s a thread of some advice for ramping up, and tips that helped me.
The biggest thing to know is this: No one can tell you how you should dress or wear makeup. I mean this both in the “you get to decide for yourself” way and the “anyone who tells you they know best is selling you something” way. However, there are still good rules of thumb.
1) STYLE IS A SKILL YOU BUILD, NOT AN INNATE QUALITY. Every girl, cis and trans, who is good at styling had to learn and experiment. You may be getting a late start, but you are not at some genetic disadvantage. You learn by trying and doing. No one emerges from HRT, or the womb, fully fashionable.
2) ONE THING AT A TIME. For many reasons, will feel like you need to learn/implement it all at once. You do not. Be patient and start with the basics, and move on when you feel comfortable with what you’ve tried.
3) DON’T CHASE TRENDS TO START. Or maybe ever. Fashion and beauty move fast—really fast, nowadays. Fast fashion is 90% garbage. 90% of dumb makeup trends won’t last a year. Start with classic looks, cuts, and designs that have stood the test of time. They’ve done that for a reason.
4) TAKE CARE OF YOUR SKIN. Your face is your canvas. When it’s in good shape, everything from makeup application to shaving easier. Get decent drugstore moisturizer like CeraVe/Cetaphil, retinol/tretinoin, and SPF50 facial sunscreen. These are the Big Three, and many girls never need more.
5) SMALL THINGS HELP YOU LOOK “PUT TOGETHER”. Match your hardware—that is, the metals in your jewelry and your accessories. Gold earrings with a gold belt buckle, etc. Wearing shapewear for knockout moments smooths out your silhouette and just makes clothes look better.
6) FIGURE OUT “COLOR SEASON”. Based on your skin’s undertones, certain colors will pop and look better on you than others. (Yellow looks bad on me; deep green looks great.) Look up “color seasons” to find your range. They’re not hard rules, but they’ll help you develop an eye for shopping.
7) DON’T BUY ANYTHING YOU DON’T LOVE. This is a very simple rule. If you don’t love it, don’t buy it, don’t put it in your wardrobe. Don’t buy to buy. This will solve many early problems. You deserve to feel good when you get dressed.

FIND YOUR SHOWSTOPPER PIECES. These pieces can be anything—a dress, a bag, a coat, some shoes—but they’re pieces that you adore and that make a statement. Then, build your wardrobe around them. I have a showstopper Lagerfeld coat people love, but yours could be a fun thrifted purse or anything.
9) IN CLOTHING, YOU DO OFTEN GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR. I see pricier or designer clothes get dismissed a lot as being no better than cheapies, and that is usually wrong. There is a price at which stuff stops being worth it, but pricier stuff often means better construction/materials and a longer life.
9 CONT) Be smart about pricier pieces you do buy—can you build outfits around this? How often will you wear it? But investing in a nice coat, a well made pair of jeans, real leather goods, better jewelry etc usually means you’ll get something that lasts. When in doubt, read reviews.
10) AVOID DROPSHIPPERS. Yes, this means Temu, SHEIN, etc. but it also means many online storefronts that are made to look like legitimate brands but are really more cheap goods drop shipped from China. If you’re not familiar with a brand, Google “[brand name] Trustpilot” and read the 1-star reviews.
11) SOME STUFF WILL JUST NOT BE FOR YOU. It sucks but it’s true. You may not be built for whatever trend. There may be dress cuts that make you feel like shit. Clothes may be made for smaller shoulders or smaller bellies. That just means you look elsewhere. Don’t get hung up—it’s for someone else.
12) FINALLY: DON’T BE RULED BY FEAR. Being trans means being worried about safety. Believe me, I know. But these fuckers are gonna be shitty to you no matter what you wear on your face or body. When something makes you feel like a million bucks, don’t let a hypothetical keep you from it. Go slay.
This is hardly a comprehensive guide but I hope it gives you a good foundation to start if you’re struggling. I came out at 32. Building a wardrobe, learning makeup felt impossible. It isn’t. Remember you are surrounded by sisters and cisters. Help is just a question away.