💪 Tough Guys Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[Anonymus Fluhre]

This would be a lot of fun but there's so many to choose from.

Gun expert pat
Geopolitics pat
Car expert pat
Resistance fighter pat
Irl toughguy pat
Science pat
Sports fan pat
Commando pat


I know I'm missing some

General Fatton is always a good laugh. He's quite active too

 

[The Noise]

So I think everyone on this board is aware of Ralph’s law: Every lolcow W is followed by an L of equal or greater value.

This got me thinking, has Rick ever had a win? He lost Aide, lost to Quasi, will soon (probably) lose to MPD. Where is the win? Is this all fallout from the publishing deal?

I very vaguely remember some super obscure lolcow that randomly tried to get involved in trolling Patrick, and Patrick clapped back so thoroughly that the guy stopped alogging him outright. I just wish I could remember who it was.

Patty's only real notable thing this year is the lolsuit, which is just starting to take shape. And I guess chimping out over his lawn chairs.

By the rules of arbitrary categorization, IMO, there are two broad types of lolcows:

Active: The lolcow consistently engages in deranged or uniquely humorous behavior. All lolcows start out as Active just by law, but after a long enough time may transition to Passive if new milk doesn't break stride with their usual antics or doesn't "raise the bar" in some manner. See: Samuel Collingwood Smith, Liz-Fong Jones, old Chris-Chan, Patrick etc.

Passive: The lolcow is consistent in their behavior, but it is not unique/does not break status quo with their known modus operandi. Moviebob is probably the best example of this; he's still bleating on social media every day but it's nothing he hasn't been doing for the past couple of years already.

Patrick is pretty Passive right now but he has a habit of sporadically jumping back into Active. It's anybody's game, folks!

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

I love how Rick just directly admits that the dumbest man in the world beat the best candidate the Democrats have ever produced.

 

[Morshu's Paradise]

You got a point, I just don't know who else even comes close to the magnitude of Rekietas collapse this year.
Personally I don't think he should have won last year, but this year I can't think of anyone thats fucked up as much, as badly, or as consistently as Balldo has.
I'm still voting for Pat though just on principle.
I've found Pat far funnier than Rekieta, Balldo disgusts me more than anything, I'd rather vote for someone I find funny, even if its pretty much a lost cause at this point.

Sure but what's even funny about Rekieta's collapse? He's a sadcow or a dramacow, but I don't think I've ever actually LOLed at anything he's said or done.

 

[Make Anime Illegal]

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Shitty xitter meme format aside, the fuck does "chi-chi's" mean in this context?

He's right, a coincidence is when two incidents coincide. Here one incident occured before the other one even happened. Thanks Pat for proving this incident is not Trump's fault.

 

[AnOminous]

Sure but what's even funny about Rekieta's collapse? He's a sadcow or a dramacow, but I don't think I've ever actually LOLed at anything he's said or done.

How is getting catfished and singing a serenade to a dude he thought was a woman not hilarious?

And I'll note this was after MULTIPLE people were like "yo that's obviously a dude."

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

Sure but what's even funny about Rekieta's collapse? He's a sadcow or a dramacow, but I don't think I've ever actually LOLed at anything he's said or done.

I dunno, Judge Pussy Liquor was pretty funny.

But yeah, in general he’s just pathetic.

 

[Post Reply]

That's right, stalkers. Unless you are Rick's little brother, your life is already over. Earth, Population of 1!

 

[Sexy Peach Emoji]

I love how Rick just directly admits that the dumbest man in the world beat the best candidate the Democrats have ever produced.

That's the thing, isn't it? If Trumps IQ was actually 73, it really lays bare the fact that the establishment has so entirely fucked things up that people would vote for the dumbest man alive over their people. Also, if Trumps IQ is really 73, what is Pat's excuse for not being as successful as Trump?

 

[The Noise]

How is getting catfished and singing a serenade to a dude he thought was a woman not hilarious?

And I'll note this was after MULTIPLE people were like "yo that's obviously a dude."

I think there's a case to be made that some lolcows aren't particularly funny, just interesting. I've never laughed out loud at a Patrick tweet but I just think he's interesting to watch, in the same way that old ladies gossiping in the salon aren't doing it for comedic value.

 

[TheMeanOne]

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That's right, stalkers. Unless you are Rick's little brother, your life is already over. Earth, Population of 1!

He's so bad at writing. If you picked any KFer at random and handed them a book deal, you'd end up with a better writer than Fatrick.

 

[Red Frida]

Sure but what's even funny about Rekieta's collapse? He's a sadcow or a dramacow, but I don't think I've ever actually LOLed at anything he's said or done.

You don't think it's funny a trust fund baby fucked his life up because he can't figure out how to turn off his webcam while he's doing coke and to hire a nanny to take care of his kids?
Patrick got further ahead in life than any retard born to a rodeo clown deserved, even if that distance is a half hovel he's still paying the mortgage for.
Crackieta had life on easy mode and committed major unforced errors because he couldn't handle two tasks.
He also put Vic half a million in debt and put boss baby Barnes in the hospital from the stress of reading Nick's court filings.
I think Nick is the clear winner, sorry to say.

 

[Pat's Pointer Finger]

You don't think it's funny a trust fund baby fucked his life up because he can't figure out how to turn off his webcam while he's doing coke and to hire a nanny to take care of his kids?
Patrick got further ahead in life than any retard born to a rodeo clown deserved, even if that distance is a half hovel he's still paying the mortgage for.
Crackieta had life on easy mode and committed major unforced errors because he couldn't handle two tasks.
He also put Vic half a million in debt and put boss baby Barnes in the hospital from the stress of reading Nick's court filings.
I think Nick is the clear winner, sorry to say.

yeah but pat is fat

 

[Meriasek]

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Does he have ANY frame of reference that's not based in superhero slop? I mean I know the answer, but geez.

Real answer is that he sees himself as the epitome of positive masculinity, and how he sees himself is entirely fictional.

 

[TurboNAS]

He's so bad at writing. If you picked any KFer at random and handed them a book deal, you'd end up with a better writer than Fatrick.

You’re gonna be eating lots of crow when Patrick’s book gets released and Tiny Tim finds Scrooge’s murderer. Aaaaany day now. Wait for the release, stalker.

 

[Something Awful]

Rick already bitching that Bluesky doesn't have enough moderation.

Also, nice ad, stupids. Did you get an Indian on Fiverr to make it out of MS Office clip art?

 

[Judge Holden]

Ya know it really is a mistake to check out fatrick's latest oinks while at work....

Only sociopaths like you "Pat post."

Also yeah Jackie is straight up patposting herself now and pig man is too retarded/in denial to accept it. Even his biggest fucking enabler and asspatter cant hide her fucking contempt for him lol

 

[Maude Snew]

yeah but pat is fat

So's Nick. If he really wants to impress and attract new swingers to his hot tub he needs to get rid of that pesky coke bloat, maybe cut back on that single Dorito too, maybe try some good old Meth, gets rid of extra tooth weight as well.

 

[NaggotFigger]

That's the thing, isn't it? If Trumps IQ was actually 73, it really lays bare the fact that the establishment has so entirely fucked things up that people would vote for the dumbest man alive over their people. Also, if Trumps IQ is really 73, what is Pat's excuse for not being as successful as Trump?

It also has to do with the fact that Rick barely graduated high school with an excuse of a GPA as low as 1.2 (excluding P.E). He's fucking jealous as shit towards people who are far more successful than he is. Rick doesn't do anything valuable to contribute life, aside from making barren excuses that he's "working" on his failures and being lazy. Nice job, retard.

Ya know it really is a mistake to check out fatrick's latest oinks while at work....
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Also yeah Jackie is straight up patposting herself now and pig man is too retarded/in denial to accept it. Even his biggest fucking enabler and asspatter cant hide her fucking contempt for him lol

Rick is such an pathetic, unlikable pig that, even the self-proclaimed "legal hacker" like Jackie would mock him back eventually. Rick, we know you're ass pissed off to the point that you pretend not to cope, seethe and dilate over others having a better take than him. Enjoy Patposting, stalker swine

 

[just Reading a post]

Ya know it really is a mistake to check out fatrick's latest oinks while at work....
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Also yeah Jackie is straight up patposting herself now and pig man is too retarded/in denial to accept it. Even his biggest fucking enabler and asspatter cant hide her fucking contempt for him lol

The fuck is this retard doing back on X? I thought he quit the site totally forever for his new hotness Fagsky.
Let me guess the far leftist assholes didn't even want him and he is on numerous block lists, so he has been talking to himself, realised nobody likes him and came back to X.