Lord of the Rings TV Series in Development - How could this POSSIBLY go wrong...

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Overly Serious said:
Sauron I can agree with. By far the most interesting character, Adar a possible second place. The dwarves... I find quite over the top in how silly their storyline is. And I feel quite sorry for the actor who plays the dwarven king as they gave him more facial hair than Cousin It and then give him dialogue that has almost nothing to it. How can you act seriously under all that? But okay, I can at least understand an interest there. I am (respectfully) dumbfounded that you pick out the Stranger storyline as one of your main reasons. Watching him bumble his way through like a failed Harry Potter character is dreadful to me. Though I did find it hilarious when he accidentally blew away the hobbits and by all rights should have killed them then and there. Each their own, though.

I've grown to actually quite like the actress, though not the character. Which is probably a bad sign if I can draw such a distinction just from watching the show. But still, your comment intrigues me - what role or sort of role do you think would suit her better?
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She's fine as an elf, I just can't see her as Galadriel. Maybe she'll level out whenever Celeborn comes back into the picture. As for the Stranger, it's mostly the actor lending a bit of charm to the role more than the storyline itself. Sort of how Elendil's actor basically carries Numenor's stuff.
 
starborn427614 said:
She's fine as an elf, I just can't see her as Galadriel. Maybe she'll level out whenever Celeborn comes back into the picture.
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I don't see how they can introduce Celeborn without it being a mess. I didn't watch S1 so maybe there are numerous references and mourning sequences where she talks about her lost husband (though I didn't get that impression) but either way he doesn't seem to exist in the show in S2 at all. It also makes her a worse person for entertaining a relationship with Sauron if her husband appears because it shows she apparently forgot about him. I guess if she explicitly has reason to think he's dead but I don't know that she does. And presumably his disappearance is a recent thing.
 
Overly Serious said:
I've grown to actually quite like the actress, though not the character. Which is probably a bad sign if I can draw such a distinction just from watching the show. But still, your comment intrigues me - what role or sort of role do you think would suit her better?
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The problem with the actress is two-fold:

1) Physically speaking, she looks and has the mannerisms of a lower-class peasant girl than a wise and ancient queen of elves. I know it sounds elitist but Cate Blanchett actually looked like an upper-class lady and had an "intelligent" look about her for lack of a better term which this girl doesn't.

2) Her acting is also like that of a generic rank-and-file elf citizen that gets shitfaced at the local pub rather than one of the elite. Blanchett's acting had a sense of gravitas to it, like you needed to hang on to every word she said. She also spoke slowly and clearly while the new chick talks too fast and comes off as a bit nervous at times. It seems silly but these little quirks go a long way to differentiate how someone is perceived by others.
 
ArthuriusMartyrius said:
The problem with the actress is two-fold:

1) Physically speaking, she looks and has the mannerisms of a lower-class peasant girl than a wise and ancient queen of elves. I know it sounds elitist but Cate Blanchett actually looked like an upper-class lady and had an "intelligent" look about her for lack of a better term which this girl doesn't.

2) Her acting is also like that of a generic rank-and-file elf citizen that gets shitfaced at the local pub rather than one of the elite. Blanchett's acting had a sense of gravitas to it, like you needed to hang on to every word she said. She also spoke slowly and clearly while the new chick talks too fast and comes off as a bit nervous at times. It seems silly but these little quirks go a long way to differentiate how someone is perceived by others.
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to be fair, expecting good direction in a show like this is a folly. I'll hold my judgement till I see her elsewhere in a better environment (hopefully, good chance it's gonna kill her career daisy ridley style).
 
Jesus fucking christ...I genuinely and sincerely thought my absolute fucking contempt for this shit had bottomed out weeks ago but....fucking jesus....
 
strawberry15 said:
They are really doing their best to get a reaction from us.
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It actually fucking astonishes me they managed to pull off something worse than "Galadriel falls in love with Sauron" but here we fucking are.

Given how even the literal bot accounts and clinically retarded gif-spammer consoomer accounts on social media are barely even noticing this shit's existence, It would not surprise me that they are straight up desperate to provoke a loud enough backlash to use for cheap "WE AM BEING HARASSEDEDED!!!" whine campaigns
 
It does make you wonder how many awkward conversations lie in Elrond's future.

Celebrian: "I was cleaning out some of your old stuff and found this letter from mom addressed to you. Why does she call you 'My darling?'"
Elrond: "Ah, well, um, before you were born your mother and I well, we were, um, more than friends...."
Celebrian: "You dated my mom before she met dad? And you never thought to mention it?"
Elrond: "Well, actually this was after she married your dad..."
Celebrian: "Oh my Valor! Does dad know you banged mom?"
Arwen entering from behind the arras: "You banged gramma Galadriel?"

*Palantir starts ringing, Galadriel's face appears.*

Celebrian: "Mom, I just found out who you used to date! How could you?"
Galadriel (embarrassed): "Now in my defence, I didn't know at the time that he was Sauron."
Celebrian: "WHAT?"
Galadriel: "Wait, um, who did you mean?"

Arwen storms out: "I hate this family!"
 
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ParasiteSteve said:
Its a show made for gays and women, of course its going to be nothing more than a soap opera. Surprised anyone bothers to get annoyed, its was pretty well signalled what was going to happen from the get-go.
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Its mostly just genuine astonishment at how much more shit the show manages to become despite having seemingly hit rock bottom multiple times.

Its a bit like how even people who completely fuckin abandoned ship on the Star Trek franchise circa Discovery Season 2 were still blown away by hearing about how much worse it became after they left with shit like Stacey Abrams being given a guest role as President of Earth or Picard and Six of Nine fighting evil ICE agents in currentyear america. Sometimes shit is so fucking asinine that even the most jaded of cynics cannot help but feel just a little more disgusted.

Also your note about it being nothing more than a soap opera is truer than you know. Many have spoken about how bad shit got once tumblr breached containment, but few realise just how much worse it was when the soap opera demographic found themselves without new soap operas, thus causing them to migrate en-masse to other franchises and turn ever more shit into cheap currentyear melodrama.
 
I am glad I'm not a Tolkien fan (and yes, I'm aware that other franchises I'm fan of have been destroyed)

strawberry15 said:
Did they really made elrond and galadriel kiss?
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Overly Serious said:
It does make you wonder how many awkward conversations lie in Elrond's future.

Celebrian: "I was cleaning out some of your old stuff and found this letter from mom addressed to you. Why does she call you 'My darling?'"
Elrond: "Ah, well, um, before you were born your mother and I well, we were, um, more than friends...."
Celebrian: "You dated my mom before she met dad? And you never thought to mention it?"
Elrond: "Well, actually this was after she married your dad..."
Celebrian: "Oh my Valor! Does dad know you banged mom?"
Arwen entering from behind the arras: "You banged gramma Galadriel?"

*Palantir starts ringing, Galadriel's face appears.*

Celebrian: "Mom, I just found out who you used to date! How could you?"
Galadriel (embarrassed): "Now in my defence, I didn't know at the time that he was Sauron."
Celebrian: "WHAT?"
Galadriel: "Wait, um, who did you mean?"

Arwen storms out: "I hate this family!"
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We laugh, but I am sure many people would want this scene to happen for real because it's "funny".
 
Screen rant coming in hot with an article guaranteed to piss everyone off. What's funny is they aren't even doing it on purpose. They just don't know anything about Tolkien or his work and quickly skimmed a Wikipedia before shitting out an article.


How Elrond Is Related To The Maiar, The Beings That Created Lord Of The Rings' World​


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Sweeties, Middle Earth is not "The Lord of the Rings' " world. It is OUR world, in the same way Odysseus fighting the cyclops on his journey back from the Trojan War is OUR world. It is a mythological story of pre-history for the people of England. The actual England, that exists in OUR world.

More importantly, the Maiar did not "create" the world. They aided in the song of creation at the direction of the One God, Eru, who men call Illuvatar. Maiar is also just a definition of rank amlng the members of the heavenly choir who are collectively called the Ainur.

SMH. This shit can't even be good fanfiction at this point.
 
*Downs third double shot of the morning*

Ok ya know what. I am throwing down the fuckin gauntlet to LAWD DEM RAAAAANGZ right here and now.

I am predicting that the reason why Celeborn and Celebrian have not appeared in the show is because the showrunners have decided to further "condense the timeline" by having Elrond and Galadriel shack up together and Galadriel winds up being Arwen's mother because fuck you.

I fucking dare the show to do worse than this, like they have the rest of my spiteful predictions.

starborn427614 said:
Beyond that retarded moment with Elrond kissing his future mother-in-law, that was an OK episode. Probably the one that felt the most LOTR to date, but it's still all pretty superficial. Very telling that the episode without Numenor or Rhun was the most engaging of the season.
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starborn427614 said:
Beyond that retarded moment with Elrond kissing his future mother-in-law, that was an OK episode. Probably the one that felt the most LOTR to date, but it's still all pretty superficial. Very telling that the episode without Numenor or Rhun was the most engaging of the season.
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There are no words in the tongues of elves and men to describe this insanity
 
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