Niggercattle finance - Kiwi Farms' Caleb Hammer Moment

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reptile baht spaniard rid said:
what chaps my ass is I had to learn about shit like 400% of federal poverty line - bennies go that high! I'm not making mcdonalds wages here and yet I qualify for poornigger programs; shit is insane.
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Man. Where do I learn about this stuff?
It's such a morbid fascination for me, kind of like when you see someone in a scooty-puff at the store.
 
the websites are all state and federal run, and they're pretty easy to maneuver, the hard part is knowing you should even try

the most annoying thing is they never just tell you "make X get Y" it's always based on poverty line and some calculations

here's some to poke:

(shit just realized I may qualify)

And here's a huge fuckoff list:

 
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Audit said:
They're cut from the same fabric as people who buy a house and plan out their budget based on the mortgage payment alone, excluding home maintenance, repair, insurance, and taxes. Sadly, until they financially implode, they keep thrusting the housing prices higher with reckless overvaluation of assets.
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They will not financially implode because there are milliona of them who failed upward by buying the house before Bidenflation and locked in low interest rates. At some point there are going to be people who bought shitty houses in 2009-2020 and could pay their mortgage by working at McDonalds (unless we get the scenario where AI causes massive deflation). I will not be shocked to see these people agitating for freezes on property taxes similar to Proposition 13 in California. Their mortgages are fixed, but right now their taxes and insurance rates are subject to inflation. They won’t like that, but the government will probably bail them out again because it’s centered around placating niggers.
 
Angry Shoes said:
Agreed, the average dude can just buy SPY, VOO, or any other similar broad-market fund and get these same gains. People tend to overthink investing but there are ETFs and mutual funds anyone can buy that completely remove all the guesswork or the need for an actively managed account.
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Speaking of, I was looking into ETFS (Vanguard ones, at least)

Is it really this easy? I'm sure Vanguard gets better returns because they have great funding but can I just really put my money in VOO and their IT ETFs and be fine? They have some pretty fucking good returns. (12%+)
 
hideandgoseekchampion said:
Speaking of, I was looking into ETFS (Vanguard ones, at least)

Is it really this easy? I'm sure Vanguard gets better returns because they have great funding but can I just really put my money in VOO and their IT ETFs and be fine? They have some pretty fucking good returns. (12%+)
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Like any other investment you're taking a risk. If large-cap stocks go down large-cap ETFs will follow. However if you're looking at long-term growth and you can stomach some risk it's probably the move for you. Statistically the S&P500 (and the ETFs that track it) will usually outperform most stock returns. As of late I've been selling individual stocks and using the money to buy ETFs. It's a much less stressful way to grow your money. You never have to research stock picks or worry about when to buy in or anything like that. Just buy VOO or VTI and let the account handle itself.
 
My dirt poor brother who still lives at home spends all his money on payments for his brand new 2024 Chevy Silverado, as well as insurance. What he has left, he uses on his phone bill, alcohol and sports betting.
 
RA-5C Vigilante said:
The US Army is an entire organization of these people.

Get paid 2-3k a month.
Spend it on Jordans.
Spend it on video games.
Spend it on alcohol.
Lots of alcohol.
Liver-failing amounts.
Spend it at the bars and clubs off post trying to pick up 3/10s.
Spend it on Dodge Chargers/Mustangs with a 32% APR.
Get married at 18 and marry your HS sweetheart.
She gets fat, spending your money on food for her disgusting eating habits.
Slides two to three little shits you have to care for.
One of them may not be yours.
Congrats! You're trapped in the Army because its a stable money flow and you can't escape. Kill yourself or feel self-hatred for the rest of your life.

I saved my money by having only $500 in my checking account and saved everything else when paycheck hit. Then I get asked by people older than me, completely baffled, how I have so much money now.
I fucking hate the military.
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The exit interview was fun. The SNCO who.had been calling me stupid for months looked like he'd just got fucked in the ass at how much money I had.
 
Not taking advantage of the high interest savings accounts available right now counts.

SangeAndYasha said:
Americans love to financially die on their car costs. I'm convinced its probably as bad if not worse of a debt trap than ccs. Not only do they take out large loans which eat at their savings, but insurance and repairs get worse as you get nicer and nicer cars. And once you recognize that most "luxury" cars are just shitty brands with a rebranded badge it becomes more absurd. Cars are only cool if there's a story other than 'I bought it last year at the dealership for 10% over msrp'.

I know a guy that spent 130k on a jaguar (Tata lol) as a mid life crisis spend. Even if you're an engineer like him that's pretty dumb and pathetic.
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I don't think they're a worse debt trap than credit cards because it's definitely easier for dimwits to get into impossible levels of debt on cards than with a car, but they're definitely a debt trap. It is common for people to buy a new car and get a big payment for no good reason though, you hear all of the stories once you make a friend who worked in sales at a car dealership. I'm sure there is at least one farmer who can chip in some retarded financing stories. The worst are people who have a car that is only a few years old or moderately inefficient then get themselves into a financed car that clearly costs more than the maintenance and fuel on the older car under the justification that the car and fuel is going to cost a lot. I have had (in law) family question my old cars before because I can "clearly afford" something new with what I've spent on my small collection. All of my cars are appreciating.

Engineers make decent money but they're out earned by tech sector people, or at least they were, there seems to be some turbulence in tech. Engineers have no excuse for being bad with money though, most of engineering is optimizing things these days, and you have to have some natural ability to work with numbers to get through calculus and differential equations which are still required for all engineers other than software engineers as far as I know. I have seen young engineers make such financial mistakes before though. $130,000 is a lot of car for an engineer, a vast majority of them make less than that, it's a senior engineer's salary outside of places like CA and NY where wages are high because they have to be.
 
hideandgoseekchampion said:
Speaking of, I was looking into ETFS (Vanguard ones, at least)

Is it really this easy? I'm sure Vanguard gets better returns because they have great funding but can I just really put my money in VOO and their IT ETFs and be fine? They have some pretty fucking good returns. (12%+)
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Like @Angry Shoes said, ETFs and index funds are your best bet to get rich, although it's relatively slower. Just put money in when you can and don't touch it. Don't worry about the current price, either. Market timing is a fool's errand. They will be volatile, but over the long term they'll go up. I put money into VTSAX (VTI is the ETF) each month and don't try to time the market. Whatever it is on that date, I buy.

I would also recommend an ETF that tracks an index, either the S&P 500 (VOO) or total market (VTI) or their equivalent mutual funds. The cost will be way cheaper and they beat the vast majority of actively-managed funds over the long term. Again, don't look at the current value so you aren't tempted to panic and sell. Just buy when you can and in 30 years you'll be loving this post.
 
Big brain investment moves:

Buying a non-municipal bond fund in a taxable account.
Paying commissions in 2024.
Excessively trading short term stocks and triggering wash sale rules constantly (I feel like you could make an equivalent of the negligent discharge greentext with wash sale rule triggering).
Not managing your 401k at all, leaving it as the cash account because ‘I don’t want to lose money’.
Buying meme stocks with your HSA (and then your wife gets pregnant).
Buying precious metal ETNs (literally buying an IOU for gold).
Buying Boomer-grade investments (whole life, annuities, those weird second mortgage products nobody understands).

Another thing that might not be so common now since covid is buying engagement rings (and general wedding grifts) with a loan. At least it doesn’t depreciate like a car though!

There are some people who should never, ever be allowed to have credit cards. It seems like these people always have something bad happen to them and always need money. Bonus points for trying to start a ‘business’ and asking people for funds.
 
Guy I do martial arts with is on eight different gambling apps and maxes out the daily limit on all of them. He doesn't know how much he is in for in total. If he didn't live with his parents he would be homeless for sure.
 
hideandgoseekchampion said:
Speaking of, I was looking into ETFS (Vanguard ones, at least)

Is it really this easy? I'm sure Vanguard gets better returns because they have great funding but can I just really put my money in VOO and their IT ETFs and be fine? They have some pretty fucking good returns. (12%+)
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It is that easy.

I’m a fan of investing a set monthly amount into an index fund as a long term strategy and sweeping monthly leftovers into a money market account.
 
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ObeseScreamingBlackMan said:
It is that easy.

I’m a fan of investing a set monthly amount into an index fund as a long term strategy and sweeping monthly leftovers into a money market account.
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This. I have most of my net worth in just boring old index funds (total us stock market index, total international stock market index, total short term bond index). I put money in each month. They do great over the long haul. I am actually slowly moving all of the money i have in the short-term bond index into stock index but im doing it very, very slowly with DCA.

The best is when you keep putting the money in during a downturn and then when it goes back up, your account goes up very fast.

I have a bit of money that I put into individual stocks and options but it's a very small amount (like <5% of my portfolio)
 
The virgin paying your bills versus the Chad debt Max so pay none of your bills there's nothing the credit card companies can do to you I mean I personally have never done it but here's the thing if you're $100,000 in debt just don't pay it it's that simple.
I'm gonna let you on the worst kept secret in the finance world the debt you have today will be worth less money tomorrow.

On ironically that one Asian guy has the best advice when it comes to debt buy everything on debt because the debt will be worth less money in two years than it is today a bar of gold would just go up

the best investment advice I ever got was from this crazed 65 year old man he told me to put all of my money in World War 2 memorabilia and I probably should have listened to him because when I was like 16 you could buy Nazi stuff for much cheaper now it's basically 10 times more expensive .
S&P 500 are scams real physical objects is where you should invest your money but do research before you buy stuff and only buy from reputable dealers.
Avoid video games unless you know what you're looking for most of it's overpriced and it's a bubble
 
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An old friend has $190k in unsecured consumer debt, plus whatever the mortgage and vehicles he still owes on. Him and his wife pull down almost that much each year combined. Hey, gotta get the fastest internet, biggest 4k tv, coolest new guns, fanciest vacations and the like. Admittedly I'm one of the stingiest people out there, but goddamn, how do people live like this? He's actually a bright guy and knows how fucked up it is, but I think he's just so far down the hole that it's like, well, I'm fucked so might as well enjoy it while I can.
 
I just had a thought. Isn't our entire system of procuring a place to live in the world the most niggerish thing you could possibly do with your money. Seriously, here's my train of thought:

-You save up an astronomical amount of money in order to take out a loan so the bank can buy you a house, on top of that, you have to pay a lot of fees to middleman that would make a payday lender blush. Once you have said loan, you have to pay it off of course, but with a terrible interest rate schedule that nobody ever thinks about.

-if you somehow don't have the money to beg a bank to let you borrow more money than you'll make in a decade, you have to rent a house from someone else. Then you're at the mercy of whoever you rent a place to live from and they can come in and take your shit.
 
The most Niggercattle move possible is to emulate/listen to influencers on what to do, at best it will be too late to join, at worst you just got into a scam.

The same with journalism is also bad but not nearly as risky.
 
wtfNeedSignUp said:
The most Niggercattle move possible is to emulate/listen to influencers on what to do
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Let’s be honest, when you think influencer, think ho that shills products and advertises to you because she whores out for large companies that pay her to shill their product and brainwash NPCs.

Tell me I’m wrong. It’s a business, a business of selling you the perception of a lifestyle, told from the eyes of some dead-eyed woman playing pretend. It’s easy to spot, weak people eat it up, because most people are fucking retarded.
 
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