💀 Horrorcow Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta / "u/Early-Leopard-8351" - Polysubstance abuser, child doser, dog killer. "Lawtube pope" turned zesty Dabbleverse Redditor streamer. Swinger "whitebread ass nigga" who snuffs animals and visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold. Still not over his ex Aaron. Wife's bod worth $50.

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Luna's expiration date is?

  • <1 year

    Votes: 158 22.6%

  • Around 2 years

    Votes: 278 39.8%

  • 3-5 years

    Votes: 94 13.4%

  • As long as a pug lives, Karen farmer.

    Votes: 169 24.2%
  • Total voters
    699
Stupor Mario said:
The enhanced audio actually lets you hear her mouth as she's blowing him. The whole clip makes so much more sense now, especially the part where he mumbles about "Why are you doing this now?" while looking down under the table.
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People keep saying this and I listen to the “enhanced audio” but I can’t hear any talking or anything that actually sounds like a blowjob.

As an ex-cokehead/drunk, I have a hard time believing he could get an erection in this state.
 
Fapcop said:
IV may be too hardcore for Rekieta as of now, so they might go for vaginal/anal administration instead.
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Amusing though the idea is, all that'll get you is a frozen asshole/cunt. With cocaine and it's short half-life, you need a method of administration that'll cross the blood/brain barrier fast. If IV is too hardcore for him, I'd expect him to start rocking it up and basing the damn shit.

That said, if he was smoking the stuff, you'd expect to see the typical 'Night of the living basehead' behaviour patterns and while he does look like the corner crackhead, I don't see anything indicative of someone who's just smoked crack.
xbv said:
As an ex-cokehead/drunk, I have a hard time believing he could get an erection in this state.
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Even if he could get it up, such people are generally much more interested in the drugs than they are in sex.
 
Do you guys like lawtube internet streamer Nick Rekeita?


His early work was a little too “christian conservative family man grift” for my tastes, but when Dear John came out in '24, I think he really came into his own, both as a lolcow and as a drunk. The whole stream has a slow, slurring sound, and a disheveled aura of imminent decline that really gives the ranting a big boost. He's been compared to Ethan Ralph, but I think Rekeita has a much more bitter, cynical sense of humour.


Later in '24, Rekeita released this, The Appealstream, his most accomplished stream. I think his undisputed masterpiece was getting a sloppy bj from his former friend’s ex-wife under the table high on coke with his own wife passed out in the next room, an act so degenerate, most people probably can’t even hear the belt being unfastened. But they should! Because it's not just about the pleasures of drugs, and the importance of his downward marital trend, it's also a personal statement about Rekeita himself!

5D6549D2-639B-472D-8880-4C689D5A3E6E.jpeg
 
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He can’t just be sniffing coke.

No one goes 30+ minutes between bumps, especially when drinking heavily.
 
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DogZero said:
Do you guys like lawtube internet streamer Nick Rekeita?


His early work was a little too “christian conservative family man grift” for my tastes, but when Dear John came out in '24, I think he really came into his own, both as a lolcow and as a drunk. The whole stream has a slow, slurring sound, and a disheveled aura of imminent decline that really gives the ranting a big boost. He's been compared to Ethan Ralph, but I think Rekeita has a much more bitter, cynical sense of humour.


Later in '24, Rekeita released this, The Appealstream, his most accomplished stream. I think his undisputed masterpiece was getting a sloppy bj from his former friend’s ex-wife under the table high on coke with his own wife passed out in the next room, an act so degenerate, most people probably can’t even hear the belt being unfastened. But they should! Because it's not just about the pleasures of drugs, and the importance of his downward marital trend, it's also a personal statement about Rekeita himself!
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Completely unrelated, but Patposting and American Psycho memes are the objectively correct way to interact on the Internet. Thanks for making me laugh stalker child, you don't have to enjoy prison this time.
 
esoteric reference said:
From the king of the lawtube sector to IP2-style shit in two years. Goddamn. Here's to the next two years. Maybe he can take the show into the street, mace bouncers, get arrested.
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That's the part that gets me the most about his saga. I think most people watching this unfold would agree that he passed the point of no return a while ago. But it's unreal to see just how far he'll fall.
 
Doing some catching up on the Balldo saga and the only things I have to add are

How long before Uncle Drexel comes by to finger cuff April? Or will it be a private show for the Rackets?
prolapsed_cranium said:
"My kid figured out to convert Fahrenheit to Celsius while he was playing soccer."

No, Nick. That didn't happen.
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shorthand for quick mental math.

C to F = (C2+32) - C2(0.1)
F to C = (F-32 / 2) + (F-32 / 2)0.11

Mile to Km = M + M/2 + M0.1
Km to Mile = Km/2 + Km0.1 + Km0.02

C to F and F to C can be slightly off, but not by much and is perfect for most temps you engage with in your active life.

Mile to Km is fine for most regular speeds/distances, but the drift will become numerically significant when using values in the thousands. Same with Km to Mile.
 
Ivan Daniloff said:
To play devil’s advocate—why are we sure it’s April and not Our Wife?
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Feyd-Robert Rekieta said:
He stated earlier in the stream that Our Wife was upstairs sleeping.
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Also, when trying and failing to turn off the stream the corner demon appears to speak to him and he replies that Our Wife doesn't know where to turn it off either, which doesn't make sense if Kayla is the one sitting there.
 
Fapcop said:
Yeah… Just because Rekieta is a drunk loser, doesn’t make LegalBytes any less of a cunt.

You can add her name to those who thought they were king/queen of lawtube after the trial. Along with Rekieta.
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Rekieta was king for a time. LegalBytes was pretty much excommunicated after the wedding and everyone was kissing up to Nick. Who would even be the king of lawtube at this point? Out of that group I only enjoyed Branca and Legal Mindset. Mindset seems to still be talking about law but he doesn't seem openly affiliated with the rest. I'm assuming Branca's too busy teaching Boomers self defense laws to get involved.
 
porkWellington said:
Rekieta was king for a time. LegalBytes was pretty much excommunicated after the wedding and everyone was kissing up to Nick. Who would even be the king of lawtube at this point? Out of that group I only enjoyed Branca and Legal Mindset. Mindset seems to still be talking about law but he doesn't seem openly affiliated with the rest. I'm assuming Branca's too busy teaching Boomers self defense laws to get involved.
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Seems that lawtube has split up into multiple unrelated grifts.

LegalBytes still chasing the next Depp trial, Mike is doing sovereign citizens, Branca is doing self defense stuff, etc.

And Rekieta is of course drunk.
 
What are the chances Kayla doesn’t know Nick is fucking April and that’s why he took down the stream?

Today’s going to be an even harder day at school for their 16 year old than yesterday was.
 
What is it with gen Xers like Nick and their shitty boomer parents these are people who had everything during what might have been peak America, but they felt they were above having a nice house a good job in a low crime suburban neighborhood cuz they felt they were meant for more? So they destroy themselves and everything around them?
 
Schpoots said:
Moment in history: the exact time that kino casino figures out that april is sucking rackets' dick under the table. They boosted the audio and could hear his belt and her making gluck gluck sounds.

View attachment 6009758
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Called something similar during the first noticing of the corner demon.

AncientPhosphur said:
Saw the Null clip (I catch up on his stream during work drives). April off stream stripping is the corner demon. He glances and adverts his eyes while his speech increases like she took off her clothes. He closes his eyes before looking direct at her, in her underwear, apologizing how he has to take care of it while eyeballing it from top down as if someone is removing more and says see you guys as soon as possible with further plans and glances back. Is this some sort of dominatrix stuff?
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What are the odds we get a Nick and April sex tape to stick it to all the incel prudes

🥃:really:
 
Fapcop said:
Seems that lawtube has split up into multiple unrelated grifts.

LegalBytes still chasing the next Depp trial, Mike is doing sovereign citizens, Branca is doing self defense stuff, etc.

And Rekieta is of course drunk.
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Emily D Baker is probably the overall winner, she was beating Nick during the Depp trial, and managed to keep the momentum going through the crazy strategy of... streaming more trials and law stuff. She has been getting 100-300k views on the Karen Reed streams in the last couple weeks.

 
inception_state said:
Emily D Baker is probably the overall winner, she was beating Nick during the Depp trial, and managed to keep the momentum going through the crazy strategy of... streaming more trials and law stuff. She has been getting 100-300k views on the Karen Reed streams in the last couple weeks.

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She also pops up on major TV shows quite a bit. I only knew about her from this thread as I never tuned into lawtube streams, but recently she seems to have popped up quite a bit as a commentator on legit programs covering high-profile cases.
 
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