- Joined
- Feb 14, 2023
My girl Super Hon doesn’t just post like a champion. She likes commenting too! In my second round-up of her comments (here’s the first) we discover a few choice facts, such as
First, you might think it’s a fetish, and I might think it’s a flight from adulthood, but ol’ Meg’s knows transition is just about being real,man woman.
It’s also part of her journey as a Christian, luckily.
But what is transition into womanhood anyway? (note: like Billy Joel said, she’s always a woman to me)
Since her last post on her mother, there has been further reflection on her family dynamics, which are tangled but naturally involve everyone’s favourite amateur psychologist’s DX.
Enough of such sturm und drang. It’s time for Megan to have some me time. How does a girl with body hair like a Wookiee keep herself trim?
Freshly shaved, let’s kick off our heels, pour some wine, and have some girl time. Hey Megan, seen any good films lately?
link | archive
- Lost all her hair between 17 and 25
- she thinks „my person” is a better title than „my husband”
- The Tori Amos skinwalking continues: „getting some ideas from her later life wardrobe choices!”
- i actually can’t mock this: „I actually believe the monthly exposure I have around her helps sharpen my wit and my perspective—because we also need a few folks who blatantly disagree with us, so that we don’t get into too much of an echo chamber.”
First, you might think it’s a fetish, and I might think it’s a flight from adulthood, but ol’ Meg’s knows transition is just about being real,
The one unexpected blessing no one warned me about is that you will actually find that the transition will cause some old acquaintances that you weren’t that close to to become dear friends fairly rapidly in the near future. (Some people are just really sensitive to people living in denial on a subconscious level and they’ll keep you at a distance without knowing why. Once you start to live honestly, they see you as someone who is now safe to be friends with and you’ll be shocked by how much they become part of your new open and honest life!)
…
I have an amazing wife but for me to transition I had to get to the place that I would fully commit to my transition even if I lost her. In other words, I had to get to a place where my living in truth was more important than my relationships.
After that transition, as I’ve lived authentically, I’ve actually discovered a lot of attributes have arisen in me that make me a better spouse to my wife than I had before the transition—but I couldn’t know that before I took the plunge!
Be aware: It won’t go smoothly, no matter how it seems to others. But it will be something that you will not regret. For me, I realized that if I kept waiting after I knew I needed to transition, that would be something I truly would regret—and not just because I was decade older than you when I realized it!
…
Agreed. It’s an interesting space to hope she [her mother] changes without being damaged if she never does, because I’ve got to be authentic. Her desire for me to return to hiding is something I cannot and will not ever do again. (That’s part of why my journey from egg break to full out transition was so meteorically fast, as it wasn’t years, but just 4 months. Once I realized that I had been deceiving myself, I could not keep doing so without deceiving others—and that was something my soul could not abide!)
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I had a friend from church say how following my social media has made him affirm me even more because he could see how committed I was to the change—and because he could see who I was becoming and how hidden I’d been before!
…
I have an amazing wife but for me to transition I had to get to the place that I would fully commit to my transition even if I lost her. In other words, I had to get to a place where my living in truth was more important than my relationships.
After that transition, as I’ve lived authentically, I’ve actually discovered a lot of attributes have arisen in me that make me a better spouse to my wife than I had before the transition—but I couldn’t know that before I took the plunge!
Be aware: It won’t go smoothly, no matter how it seems to others. But it will be something that you will not regret. For me, I realized that if I kept waiting after I knew I needed to transition, that would be something I truly would regret—and not just because I was decade older than you when I realized it!
…
Agreed. It’s an interesting space to hope she [her mother] changes without being damaged if she never does, because I’ve got to be authentic. Her desire for me to return to hiding is something I cannot and will not ever do again. (That’s part of why my journey from egg break to full out transition was so meteorically fast, as it wasn’t years, but just 4 months. Once I realized that I had been deceiving myself, I could not keep doing so without deceiving others—and that was something my soul could not abide!)
…
I had a friend from church say how following my social media has made him affirm me even more because he could see how committed I was to the change—and because he could see who I was becoming and how hidden I’d been before!
It’s also part of her journey as a Christian, luckily.
Indeed. My understanding of the Hebrew worldview is that they believed God could only be found in the tension! The world of being trans is one of constant tension—but maybe that brings us closer to God?
…
If you read about Jesus Christ, he’s a really gender fluid guy in those days. One hand he’s a carpenter leading a motley crew of disciples who would seem more at home in the ring of WWE than in a temple, while on the other hand he’s talking about being a mother hen, and encouraging people to bring their little kids, and allowing women to be in his inner circle and fund his work. As problematic as Paul can be, his writings become a lot easier to understand if you read him as a patriarchal man’s man whose brain is just fucking broken by this Christ. Most of what he writes seems to be him just trying to process this atypical perspective on life and God.
…
If you read about Jesus Christ, he’s a really gender fluid guy in those days. One hand he’s a carpenter leading a motley crew of disciples who would seem more at home in the ring of WWE than in a temple, while on the other hand he’s talking about being a mother hen, and encouraging people to bring their little kids, and allowing women to be in his inner circle and fund his work. As problematic as Paul can be, his writings become a lot easier to understand if you read him as a patriarchal man’s man whose brain is just fucking broken by this Christ. Most of what he writes seems to be him just trying to process this atypical perspective on life and God.
But what is transition into womanhood anyway? (note: like Billy Joel said, she’s always a woman to me)
I’m earlier in my journey than you, but, at 6’5” tall and a large build, the likelihood of me facial passing as AFAB—even when I get to 3 years of HRT and even if I can afford facial electrolysis and voice training—isn’t high. But, as I hang out around other trans folks, I am discovering a comfort in not trying to fit into binary spaces of gender. There’s actually a comfort around folks who’s gender definition is blurry at best.
And I’ve already actually had some very interesting conversations that have arisen because of that in the outside world.
While there are some exceptions, in general, Trans is the only piece in LGBTQ that demands a major shift in how you present physically in order to be out of the closet. (Most others are knowledge based—ie who knows about it—and private action based—ie what I do behind closed doors with another consenting adult. They don’t have to put it on front street for the world to see; unlike the way being trans feels like it does.)
…
(And thank you for the compliment! When you start out 6’5”, you kind of have to own the height and not worry about “passing” so much!)
…
(While I like wearing wigs, because I lost my hair when I was younger, I’m starting to get used to how I look as a bald woman and liking what I see! It would be a lot less expensive than having to juggle all these stupid wigs, so maybe in the future I’ll have the courage to do it publicly, too!
)
And I’ve already actually had some very interesting conversations that have arisen because of that in the outside world.
While there are some exceptions, in general, Trans is the only piece in LGBTQ that demands a major shift in how you present physically in order to be out of the closet. (Most others are knowledge based—ie who knows about it—and private action based—ie what I do behind closed doors with another consenting adult. They don’t have to put it on front street for the world to see; unlike the way being trans feels like it does.)
…
(And thank you for the compliment! When you start out 6’5”, you kind of have to own the height and not worry about “passing” so much!)
…
(While I like wearing wigs, because I lost my hair when I was younger, I’m starting to get used to how I look as a bald woman and liking what I see! It would be a lot less expensive than having to juggle all these stupid wigs, so maybe in the future I’ll have the courage to do it publicly, too!
)Since her last post on her mother, there has been further reflection on her family dynamics, which are tangled but naturally involve everyone’s favourite amateur psychologist’s DX.
I’ve taken breaks from her in the past, but I also have a trans daughter who wants a relationship with her grandmother. I’ve talked to some trans leaders in my community that have helped me think of ways to interact with her in ways that don’t do damage, but there’s no question it’s tiresome. (Part of the reason I can probably do it in my situation is because my wife and kids support me, my work supports me, my church supports me, and I’m in therapy. That gives me more emotional latitude for dealing with my mother—at least for now. We’ll see what that looks like in the future. I’ve blocked her for other shit in the past and don’t have a problem doing it again if needed, so that also gives her less leverage on me.)
…
Agreed. It’s an interesting space to hope she changes without being damaged if she never does, because I’ve got to be authentic. Her desire for me to return to hiding is something I cannot and will not ever do again. (That’s part of why my journey from egg break to full out transition was so meteorically fast, as it wasn’t years, but just 4 months. Once I realized that I had been deceiving myself, I could not keep doing so without deceiving others—and that was something my soul could not abide!)
…
Ironically, after this exhausting exchange, a local trans leader who leads my trans support group here pointed out that, if we parent our siblings or parents, we end up exhausted. The method she used was to allow exposure to do its work over time and, strategically, every few months, show how much their callousness hurts you by asking, “you know it hurts my feelings when you misgender me and call me the wrong name. Why are you trying to hurt me?” Then just sit in the discomfort for a few minutes.
The point she brought up is that everyone knows how to react to anger—but very few people can tune out actual hurt in someone they claim to love. It’s more vulnerable for us, but it cuts deeper than any angry outburst can.
….
My mother’s a narc too!
…
Yeah. I don’t know if I quite had the ability to realize that when I was younger but, as an adult, that seems far preferable—especially since she and my kid sister are trauma-bonded in a super unhealthy codependent way, which means my sister’s a “flying monkey” a lot of the time. (Originating from the movie version of The Wizard of Oz, “Flying Monkeys” are minions of narcissists. There’s actually a sub called “raisedbynarcisists” which covers a lot of these terms and can be a great place for support. My wife clued me in because, although my mom is a more passive narc, her mom’s an aggressive one!)
…
I can say that, in my life, my mother is really conservative and is not affirming at all. (My father died when I was 18, so he’s not in the picture.) However, she didn’t disown me (even though I thought she would) and, now, she’s having to be exposed to me in girl mode every time I see her.
Sometimes we’re so sure that our parents will disown us that it rules us; when, as far as I can tell, most parents of adults don’t actually disown them for transitioning and, so long as they don’t refuse to see you, over time, there is good evidence for them coming around! (Because my mom is very religious, and I’m of the same faith, I also felt it helpful to just realize that, in heaven, a good God is going to put me in a feminine-aligned body—so my parents are going to have to get used to it there. If that’s going to be the case, anyway, then there’s no advantage in waiting until she’s dead to transition. Might as well do it now and give her more time to grow used to it!)
…
I Feel that so hard! (My mom always wanted a girl, but I was AMAB, so she adopted my sister who was the golden child—but is now enmeshed. To complicate things, Megan was the name my mom chose if I’d been born a girl—so my re-claiming of it has additional emotional weight!)
…
Occasionally, I think I see my sister realizing that she’s a lot more able to take her rightful place in our patriarchal family if the elder male is no longer male. But then she talks to my mom and gets confused all over again! (Sometimes it feels like the Christopher Nolan film, Memento!)
…
Agreed. It’s an interesting space to hope she changes without being damaged if she never does, because I’ve got to be authentic. Her desire for me to return to hiding is something I cannot and will not ever do again. (That’s part of why my journey from egg break to full out transition was so meteorically fast, as it wasn’t years, but just 4 months. Once I realized that I had been deceiving myself, I could not keep doing so without deceiving others—and that was something my soul could not abide!)
…
Ironically, after this exhausting exchange, a local trans leader who leads my trans support group here pointed out that, if we parent our siblings or parents, we end up exhausted. The method she used was to allow exposure to do its work over time and, strategically, every few months, show how much their callousness hurts you by asking, “you know it hurts my feelings when you misgender me and call me the wrong name. Why are you trying to hurt me?” Then just sit in the discomfort for a few minutes.
The point she brought up is that everyone knows how to react to anger—but very few people can tune out actual hurt in someone they claim to love. It’s more vulnerable for us, but it cuts deeper than any angry outburst can.
….
My mother’s a narc too!
…
Yeah. I don’t know if I quite had the ability to realize that when I was younger but, as an adult, that seems far preferable—especially since she and my kid sister are trauma-bonded in a super unhealthy codependent way, which means my sister’s a “flying monkey” a lot of the time. (Originating from the movie version of The Wizard of Oz, “Flying Monkeys” are minions of narcissists. There’s actually a sub called “raisedbynarcisists” which covers a lot of these terms and can be a great place for support. My wife clued me in because, although my mom is a more passive narc, her mom’s an aggressive one!)
…
I can say that, in my life, my mother is really conservative and is not affirming at all. (My father died when I was 18, so he’s not in the picture.) However, she didn’t disown me (even though I thought she would) and, now, she’s having to be exposed to me in girl mode every time I see her.
Sometimes we’re so sure that our parents will disown us that it rules us; when, as far as I can tell, most parents of adults don’t actually disown them for transitioning and, so long as they don’t refuse to see you, over time, there is good evidence for them coming around! (Because my mom is very religious, and I’m of the same faith, I also felt it helpful to just realize that, in heaven, a good God is going to put me in a feminine-aligned body—so my parents are going to have to get used to it there. If that’s going to be the case, anyway, then there’s no advantage in waiting until she’s dead to transition. Might as well do it now and give her more time to grow used to it!)
…
I Feel that so hard! (My mom always wanted a girl, but I was AMAB, so she adopted my sister who was the golden child—but is now enmeshed. To complicate things, Megan was the name my mom chose if I’d been born a girl—so my re-claiming of it has additional emotional weight!)
…
Occasionally, I think I see my sister realizing that she’s a lot more able to take her rightful place in our patriarchal family if the elder male is no longer male. But then she talks to my mom and gets confused all over again! (Sometimes it feels like the Christopher Nolan film, Memento!)
Enough of such sturm und drang. It’s time for Megan to have some me time. How does a girl with body hair like a Wookiee keep herself trim?
I don’t know if you’ve tried Harry’s 5 blade razor, or not, but I’ve found they give a pretty tight face shave and the blades last a week or two with daily use—and they’re the only 5 blade that I’ve found that put all five blades in the actual shaving mesh, rather than putting four in the mesh and an “edging” blade on the top. (I tried out a bunch of others and didn’t find they worked as well.)
With that said, I’ve been trying the Amazon Basics “Five” Blade Motion Sphere razor on my scalp, as it has a little more swivel to it, and that’s been going pretty well, even if it’s not quite as close as the Harry’s one.
With that said, I’ve been trying the Amazon Basics “Five” Blade Motion Sphere razor on my scalp, as it has a little more swivel to it, and that’s been going pretty well, even if it’s not quite as close as the Harry’s one.
Freshly shaved, let’s kick off our heels, pour some wine, and have some girl time. Hey Megan, seen any good films lately?
It’s still a little surreal to think a movie that was so popular is such genius. There’s been blowback due to its sheer popularity. If I say “Fight Club” is a masterpiece (which it is), people all nod; that’s a worthy art piece because so few people saw it. But if I say the same thing about Barbie, there’s a lot of snorts of derision just because it happened to come out at the right time for people to be drawn to its powerful message, so it was popular and profitable! 
link | archive
modern family problems
freaking out his son
flip your wig
barrel-chested babe
transphobic supply chain
ms potatohead shoots up
hrt fun
i feel pretty, oh so pretty
hair today, gone tomorrow
my monstrous autism
vintage vamp
mein Kampf mit dem Gewicht
girl with a Go-Pro
pouring one out for my homie’s Reddit account
feels like the first time
chicks dig cars
live action movie reviewing
transdoll Barbie, boundary-busting based mother
random thoughts of a sassy girl
my name is my name
i am 16, going on 17
UTI euphoria
hello boys
Megan Thee Stallion
holy roller
feeling 17, looking 70
that’s ma’amicure
Tori! Tori! Tori!
when Megan met Suzy
gurning from my girl
Be not deceived; God will NOT be mocked.
freaking out his son
flip your wig
barrel-chested babe
transphobic supply chain
ms potatohead shoots up
hrt fun
i feel pretty, oh so pretty
hair today, gone tomorrow
my monstrous autism
vintage vamp
mein Kampf mit dem Gewicht
girl with a Go-Pro
pouring one out for my homie’s Reddit account
feels like the first time
chicks dig cars
live action movie reviewing
transdoll Barbie, boundary-busting based mother
random thoughts of a sassy girl
my name is my name
i am 16, going on 17
UTI euphoria
hello boys
Megan Thee Stallion
holy roller
feeling 17, looking 70
that’s ma’amicure
Tori! Tori! Tori!
when Megan met Suzy
gurning from my girl
Be not deceived; God will NOT be mocked.
