The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch / @TenaciousRanch / Steampunk Penny / Penellope Logue / Phillip Matthew Logue - Don't cry because it ended, laugh because it's still getting worse.

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Who are the top three strongest characters in the Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe (KGIU) canon?

  • Gash Coyote

    Votes: 103 4.5%

  • Rioley

    Votes: 279 12.1%

  • Penis

    Votes: 417 18.1%

  • Loathsome Dung Eater Jen

    Votes: 300 13.0%

  • Boner

    Votes: 300 13.0%

  • Kevin Gibes

    Votes: 684 29.7%

  • The Elusive Earl

    Votes: 716 31.0%

  • Landon Hiscock

    Votes: 266 11.5%

  • The Korps LARP Brigade

    Votes: 205 8.9%

  • Kiwifarms Militia

    Votes: 1,149 49.8%

  • Kindness

    Votes: 669 29.0%

  • Trans Cucumber The Child Abandoner

    Votes: 313 13.6%
  • Total voters
    2,306
AfghanBlue said:
That same goat that butts one alpaca in the selected clip, buts another a minute later in the longer video. It’s also the first one over to hassle kev for the feed. This is the footage they have chosen for presentation. The pac’s are fucked.
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They picked the footage they did because they're actually crafting a densely symbolist narrative. The alpaca represent Penny's hopes and ďreams while the rambunctious goat that keeps trying to gore them is a metaphor for reality. Interestingly, Kevin still represents Kevin; whining and hoarding food while futililey trying to shove the goat of reality away
ellroy said:
Null should buy the tranch, turn into a memorial, charge visiting Kiwi's admission, and sell beverages and snacks to offset hosting costs.

The neighbors are probably so sick of trannies now, they'll shoot any driving down the road, Null has free armed security for his registered agent.

Make it happen Null.
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It could be used like one of those living museums. When Barb finally passes, you could get 14 Branchland Court disassembled and rebuilt brick by brick on the Tranch property.
Checkerboard Hero said:
I've been tracking this for a little and know of its existence but to hear only 10 remain is absolute cruelty and criminal negligence. I am curious how many they started with because the way I see it they should all get a year for each one they let die and if the number isn't that high make it 10 years per Alpaca.
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They've only relocated ten, seemingly the cutest fluffiest ones (which is why there's so many young ones relative to the overall herd). They haven't neglected all of the other 190 to death - some of the other survivors could still be languishing on the Tranch.

Penny touted the move to his parent's place as the Tranch "expansion". While that was a cope to cover for the massive failure of the Tranch, it might mean leaving the rest of the alpaca behind with Jarrod and that poor soul who joined them in December. We know Kevin is with Penny and it seems safe to assume Jen is as well (since he uploaded those videos for Penny to Patreon) but unclear on the others.

I can actually see that ahead of Penny euthanising the other alpaca - not because he's squeamish, but because having to put down the herd is too obvious a reminder of his failures.
 
Cuckoman said:
I would say none of the others were re-homed. No one wants to take on diseased and starved animals that have an unclear outcome. They probably just buried them in yet another massgrave.
In total, ~10 alpacas survived. How many did they have all in all over the years? Several hundred.
The killed off the geese, the sheep and several hundred alpacas. Troons fail at everything.

EDIT: all in all I think they went through close to 300 alpacas.
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This made me curious:
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How convenient of those Nazis and Polish Jews accounting for almost perfectly half of the alleged six gorillion and killing a nice round number. 9% survivorship (allegedly) for a literal holocaust and the Tranch comes in at 3.3%. E:
Beast From 20000 Faggums said:
Y'know Null was talking about buying a US address to have the 'Farms be an LLC in America, I believe, and buying the Tranch would be the perfect place! Tranny chasers never do followup, so they'd see the address is the Tranch and assume it was a hoax since the Tenacious Unicorns MUST be thriving with their alpaca wool business!
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On the off-chance this happens I nominate naming the compound KiWaCo. Similar to Kiwi and pays homage to the fact it used to be Tranny Waco and now glowies are all over it because it's Kiwi Waco. E2:
On the re-homing hypothesis- unless they put in some honest-to-God hard work and completely eschewed the internet/social media somehow, I sincerely doubt any meaningful amount were moved. I did some browsing for Alpacas out in that region and it's like dozens of animals listed among a handful of sites in total. No listings that appeared to be tranch related. There's simply not enough "volume" in this kind of market to re-home that many animals even at the giver's expense.
 
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BelUwUga said:
This made me curious:
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How convenient of those Nazis and Polish Jews accounting for almost perfectly half of the alleged six gorillion and killing a nice round number. 9% survivorship (allegedly) for a literal holocaust and the Tranch comes in at 3.3%. E:

On the off-chance this happens I nominate naming the compound KiWaCo. Similar to Kiwi and pays homage to the fact it used to be Tranny Waco and now glowies are all over it because it's Kiwi Waco.
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You're looking at the wrong sampling pool. 3.3% is correct for the average Burning Man camps. The camps that didn't share that same commitment to a kosher cookout had higher percentages depending on their main activity.
 
King Koopa said:
Did the parents not do any research, and just trusted that their idiot son wonderful daughter and her eunuch harem wives knew what they were doing?
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The parents are fucking senile and are being taken advantage of by violent, abusive troons. Christ. Why would you expect they'd do any research? Just defecating without dying is probably above their current skill level. Jesus.
 
Ophelia said:
Is it possible for the parents to kick everyone out? (Sorry am new)
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This is another tragedy-in-the-making. Penny's parents are in their late 70s and in poor health. His mother in particular has advanced Alzheimer's. I wouldn't be surprised if they get abused. At the very least, they're in danger of tripping over Kevin's hoard of toys & other junk.

Neil said:
They had around 90-100+ alpacas, right? Holy fuck, that's an 8-10% alpaca survival rate, 11%~ at best if you lowball. This is some gristly shit.
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They had ~200 alpacas at their peak. No doubt a bunch have died, but I think/hope there were still a decent number which survived and have been rehomed. Paul (aka Bonnie, the former Tranch co-founder) mentioned that he was getting involved in rehoming the animals.

ulsterscotsman said:
Will Vice news and other media now cover the mass graves at Alpchawitz after blowing so much smoke up the Tranches Ass or does it not suit the narrative?
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Yeah, not a chance. The Tranch has had like 40+ puff pieces written about them over the past 4-5 years (not even exaggerating), but I'm betting that none of those journoscum will write about the disaster now. Although it would be funny & maddening if they do... but then blame the Tranch's failure on Paul/Earl/Kiwifarms/fascists/etc.

one_time_user said:
Has anyone ASKED any/all of them where the other animals are? or, do their followers not know how to count?
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The Tranchers have been extremely quiet on social media, and their followers are the type to either ignore the disaster or circle the wagons (denying anything bad is happening or blaming the Tranch's problems on fascists, etc). To give you an idea of the freaks involved, here are some Tranch supporters who've defended them on Twitter: [1] [2] [3]
That last one is a real doozy.
 
I'm glad the members of the Tranch are now safe from Earl who will surely move in quickly to claim the abandoned property now that the trained resistance forces are gone.
 
I can only read this thread a bit at a time because I hate seeing mistreated animals. Call me MATI but I hope these fucks get convicted of animal cruelty, in addition to all the sexual offenses they're probably guilty of.
 
Temperance XIV said:
The Tranchers are still silent on social media.
Jen has resumed the Patreon updates; I assume he was just stressed or busy with the move previously. If - like me - you've ever been curious about what kind of content they put behind the Patreon paywall (but don't want to pay the Tranchers to find out), then feast your eyes:
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In this update post, you can see the youtube links which lead to unlisted videos on the Tranch's youtube channel.
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When I checked them out, there were no views and no comments on either video, despite the videos being posted two days ago. This tells me that the Tranch's Patrons don't really care about the Tranch's content... they probably just donate as a vague show of support and otherwise don't pay any attention. I also wouldn't be surprised if many of the donations are just recurring payments that have been forgotten about. It would explain why the Tranch Patreon hasn't really taken a hit despite the drama with Paul.

Here are the videos:
Everyone waiting for food [Y_WrO1nJQS8].webm
Paca in the snow [rUwG0YtMIC4].webm
It's just Penny and another troon (Kevin?) feeding the animals, same as always... riveting content. 🙄

What's interesting though is that they've clearly RELOCATED TO PENNY'S PARENTS' HOUSE!
And they're still being idiots, too. I count ~3 goats and 8-10 alpacas in these videos. That's still too many for a 5-acre plot! If they were going to keep any alpacas at all, they should've only kept 2-3. At least I don't see any sheep, thankfully. No Pepe the Vicuna either.

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That house is going to stink of Alpaca shit and new mass grave dug behind it, I'm calling it. It's beyond me why animal protection services haven't taken more through action.

I feel bad for those Alpacas, they deserved better.
 
What if they aren't dead? I wouldn't put it past the lazy shitbags to just kidnap their favorite pacas and doggos and kitties and leave the rest behind for Boner to clean up after them.
 
Sleazy Car Salesman said:
What if they aren't dead? I wouldn't put it past the lazy shitbags to just kidnap their favorite pacas and doggos and kitties and leave the rest behind for Boner to clean up after them.
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That's exactly what they did. I'm going to call this social phenomenon a Delusional Identity Crisis. It's how these millenials seem to deal with personal failures. Instead of finding a way to fit into society while being freaks where nobody civilized cares, they invent an identity that is special enough to excuse both consequences from failure and behaving according to societal customs and norms. Next macabre horror will be when someone dies and they try to cover it up, as their behavior has proven what their first instinct will be. The only constant with this shim circus is they *always* find a way to make the worst possible move.
 
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