🌟 Internet Famous James Rolfe / James D. Rolfe / Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN) / Rex Viper and Cinemassacre / Screenwave - Now with not much grieving about a 41-year old man still making videos on YouTube. We're the balls on the dick.

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Which videos do you like the most from Cinemassacre?

  • Angry Video Game Nerd

    Votes: 1,898 63.6%

  • You Know Whats Bullshit

    Votes: 148 5.0%

  • James and Mike Mondays

    Votes: 100 3.4%

  • Board James

    Votes: 467 15.7%

  • Monster Madness

    Votes: 278 9.3%

  • James' movie reviews

    Votes: 93 3.1%
  • Total voters
    2,984
Friendly Primarina said:
This was well before smartphones were a thing. Just what the hell did he do for 8 hours?
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Playing with dolls I would guess? I could see waiting for 30 minutes. But 8 hours? And I don't believe this is an exaggeration because that is a very specific number. You would just sit there for 8 hours instead of asking around or going to an office to see if someone can let you in? 8. Fucking. Hours?
 
Pictured: James in his 7th hour of waiting for the lab monitor to show up

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A film school having students digitally edit their films in the late 90s/early 2000s with such limited quantity and quality of hardware sounds pretty damn impractical. Did it have to be strictly digital or was mechanical editing not an option?
 
BrunoMattei said:
I feel kind of bad ripping on his autobiography but there's a time and a place...

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Confirms that he grew up with autism. It all makes sense in hindsight but it's amazing how long he hid it while on camera.

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It is weird to have your wife write the foreword for your autobiography. Typically speaking, the writer would have a prestigious alumni or mentor write a foreword. Or maybe you play your celebrity friend card to get more eyes on the book. You don't use your wife because it pays to have someone who has no sense of bias and gives their unique take on the subject. Also, they misspelled "foreword" which -to be fair- it's a very easy spelling mistake to make but a good editor would have caught that. I'm starting to believe that there was no editor involved

Edit: I'm grabbing bits and pieces from the Reddit so pardon me as I edit as I go.

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Another part of the foreword. The wife cannot write for shit and it feels like James wrote this bit or encouraged her. It's also wayyyyyy too pompous. This man has directed one feature. That is it. He directed a couple of shorts that played a handful of festivals but he hasn't won an Oscar, or a Golden Globe or even a People's Choice award. I can think of many other scrappy filmmakers that actually made features, got them sold and distributed to an international audience and the vast majority of those guys don't have an ego (excluding the likes of Tommy Wiseau but that's to be expected).

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We can see where his free time goes. It's pretty adorable, NGL.

More power to him for writing this but the level of the writing is very 4th grade level. Understandable but over-simplified. But I have to question the timing and the purpose of this. Is this a self-exorcism kind of thing or is it pure hubris? I.E. all the big shots write their autobiography so I have to make one. That kind of thing. But I don't think he truly understands how exposed you are when you write something like this. It's one thing to do this when you're a beloved public figure or you're trying to clear the air over something perhaps related to trauma. It's another when you do it out of hubris and make a buck off people. It leaves yourself open to ridicule.

Edit: dudes are posting pages left and right. James gives his reasoning for filming in L.A. for the AVGN Movie:

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It always rains on East Coast? Snow during Halloween one time makes it a bad idea to film? Were you planning on shooting around Halloween time? There's nothing resembling a desert ANYWHERE in Jersey? Yeah... If you read between the lines it seems like the co-director made the decision for him to film in L.A. either that or his wife.

It's funny how many asspats the wife gets. I get the impression his wife April must have been the first and only woman he's ever had sex with.

Another thing: the formatting is bad. When writing you want to format like this:

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You get the idea.

2nd edit: MORE grammatical errors:

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I thought this was a joke. I thought a dude was shit posting. But no. This is from the book. So many god damn errors and it's so awkwardly constructed. Misspelling "foreword" is one thing but this is just dog shit. There was no editor involved with this and if there was an editor then I hope to god he didn't pay for it. If he did he got ripped off.
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I wouldn't say he's a Chris-Chan level of tard, as the happening headline suggests, as he actually made something of himself and didn't fuck his mother.
 
Lupin The Turd said:
A film school having students digitally edit their films in the late 90s/early 2000s with such limited quantity and quality of hardware sounds pretty damn impractical. Did it have to be strictly digital or was mechanical editing not an option?
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Oh, I can answer this one. Back then, you needed a firewire card in order to hook up the digital camera to your computer to upload the shit. Firewire cards were cheap but you needed a pretty decent rig to render everything and you still need a suitable video card and RAM for video editing even today. I'm guessing that's why he needed access to the lab.
 
Lupin The Turd said:
A film school having students digitally edit their films in the late 90s/early 2000s with such limited quantity and quality of hardware sounds pretty damn impractical. Did it have to be strictly digital or was mechanical editing not an option?
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I don't know what it it was like at his school. But it was really impractical when I was in school. The college used Macs for editing and they always crashed on me. I hate Macs. I think the resolution was also quite low... less than 480i. So I stuck with video tape editing. It was easier (for me) and more versatile.
It was obviously a mistake. Digital editing was the future and I backed the wrong horse.
 
Wow this autobiography is a fucking mess, which anyone with half a brain could tell when the first initial previews of it came out. Now the quick snapshots that have come out from some of the truther Reddit give me the indicator that this book is a tremendous trash fire of Biblical proportions. Did he edit this shit before he released it? Like, this has to be some of the jankiest writing, that I have read in a long while. It is very difficult to follow the premise of what even is being expressed half the time, because the vernacular is not necessarily appropriate for this type of publication. In certain sections of what I have read so far, it feels like a fucking caveman wrote this thing. As soon as I seen forward, the entire train just derailed entirely off the track. The first word in your self proclaimed autobiography being wrong automatically would get the letter grade of F.
His wife being a teacher and not being able to write worth a shit either just shows the diminished standards of the American education system. Doesn’t matter her major is art either , not an excuse for not being able to catch such an easy to identify error. Clearly no proof reading or proper peer review went into this book, along side with this gives even Boogies little short story a run for its fucking money. Like what other Farmers have stated, you can juxtapose James book with Movie Bobs.

James this is why you hire editors and you have someone ghost write your autobiography; You just made yourself look like incredibly ignorant by this publication. To charge 23+ dollars for this also should be considered a crime. I’ve seen thread posts with more care and comprehension than this 320 something page disaster. I would understand maybe at most a ten dollar sticker price, if it had even the most moderate of proof reading efforts. Though this book I wouldn’t even pay the equivalent of bargain bin game prices for.

What is up with my favourite internet creators from my youth becoming massive fucking lolcows in current year? The dimensional merge really fucked everyone’s minds after the New Year hit 2017, because God damn this is just embarrassing. As another farmer pointed out, it is almost as if he just transcribed it to text to speech, and because of his broken linguistic aptitude, the algorithm could barely interpolate a conversation of the nomenclature of his sentence structure. One thing I will disagree with the speculation is the Chris Chan comparisons. What is up with that specific comparison? Just because he has some developmental issues, what ever. James a managed to overcome those issues, along side with taking a level of responsibility in his life. Chris has none of those features and is like comparing apples to oranges, total different class all together.

James could have had such a better product if he had some better support in actually publishing this autobiography. Just proves his staff sucks monkey shit and the quality of his work has suffered because of the lack of tard wranglers to suppress some of his spastic ideas. Like his current content suffers the same issues, time and time again he is making the same retarded mistakes. Then wonders why people are so prone to criticize the retarded nature of his actions.

I think the most ridiculous story in the whole book was the, “attempted suicide.” Literally water melon head tried killing himself in 2 feet of water? All because of what, he was kicked out of film school for being a complete sped. What an entitled faggot, also in front of his mother all things considered. The amount of self pity and ego stroking is just ridiculous in this garbage ass book. James true kryptonite isn’t time, but the kiddy pool. I wonder when the Alogs on the subreddit will start sending him water wings…
 
General Tug Boat said:
One thing I will disagree with the speculation is the Chris Chan comparisons. What is up with that specific comparison? Just because he has some developmental issues, what ever. James a managed to overcome those issues, along side with taking a level of responsibility in his life. Chris has none of those features and is like comparing apples to oranges, total different class all together.
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People are comparing him to Chris because James had the support and familial structure the former never had. From the book, James was as developmentally stunted as Chris, more or less. This makes people wonder how Chris might have turned out.
 
Celebrate Nite said:
Knowing him... GameBoy
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I feel like he would have mentioned that. I just picture him sitting there thinking about how dedicated he is, while staring into space. For just eight solid hours. Not even getting up and going to the bathroom or getting a drink, just staring at a wall.

Friendly Primarina said:
People are comparing him to Chris because James had the support and familial structure the former never had. From the book, James was as developmentally stunted as Chris, more or less. This makes people wonder how Chris might have turned out.
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I’d imagine Chris, with the support of James’ family and friends, could have possibly made him into, like, a fast food employee living a quiet life. James can pass as a normal guy, he doesn’t have a weird voice, he doesn’t look weird, and even in unscripted things like the podcast, people have to point out little details to prove he’s an autist. He’s certainly high functioning, but not nearly as bright as he thinks he is.
 
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General Tug Boat said:
Wow this autobiography is a fucking mess, which anyone with half a brain could tell when the first initial previews of it came out. Now the quick snapshots that have come out from some of the truther Reddit give me the indicator that this book is a tremendous trash fire of Biblical proportions. Did he edit this shit before he released it? Like, this has to be some of the jankiest writing, that I have read in a long while. It is very difficult to follow the premise of what even is being expressed half the time, because the vernacular is not necessarily appropriate for this type of publication. In certain sections of what I have read so far, it feels like a fucking caveman wrote this thing. As soon as I seen forward, the entire train just derailed entirely off the track. The first word in your self proclaimed autobiography being wrong automatically would get the letter grade of F.
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This autobiography could of easily been of one of those "man overcomes adversity and becomes rich doing something he loves" stories, which in all honesty is what Rolfe's life is. The lack of any kind of editing or proofreading and an oversharing of details in places where you could of just not mentioned them destroyed such an outcome though. For a lot of long-term viewers or fans of AVGN and Cinemassacre I think its fair to say a lot feel more disappointed and astonished then amazed and astonished when it comes their opinion on the book.
 
Breadbassket said:
This autobiography could of easily been of one of those "man overcomes adversity and becomes rich doing something he loves" stories, which in all honesty is what Rolfe's life is. The lack of any kind of editing or proofreading and an oversharing of details in places where you could of just not mentioned them destroyed such an outcome though. For a lot of long-term viewers or fans of AVGN and Cinemassacre I think its fair to say a lot feel more disappointed and astonished then amazed and astonished when it comes their opinion on the book.
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That and pure narcissism. There's so far been zero acknowledgement of ever being in the wrong. I would be curious if there's any admittance of making mistakes. The closest you get to that is how he used the money for the movie Indiegogo.
 
This guy has a video game room and a fake video store/monster movie room in his house. Did anyone ever think he wasn't super autistic? Have you seen the autistic ode to the dragon statue?

It's mostly a spectacular failure of the Screenwave peados that this emberassing ass conformation that, yes, James is atleast as autistic as you thought - has seen the light of day.

The special school thing is over the top though.
 
General Tug Boat said:
James could have had such a better product if he had some better support in actually publishing this autobiography. Just proves his staff sucks monkey shit and the quality of his work has suffered because of the lack of tard wranglers to suppress some of his spastic ideas. Like his current content suffers the same issues, time and time again he is making the same retarded mistakes. Then wonders why people are so prone to criticize the retarded nature of his actions.
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I honestly don't believe there was an editor. Either that or James entrusted his wife or Justin Silverman to do it and I'd be willing to bet it was Justin but that doesn't make sense either: Justin isn't a writer or an editor so why entrust this sleazy unfunny obese man to edit your book? Who knows? But James gave him a shoutout for "helping" so it's a possibility. I'm willing to bet that Justin pulled a George Castanza and converted it to Word and called it a day.

 
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waffle said:
This guy has a video game room and a fake video store/monster movie room in his house. Did anyone ever think he wasn't super autistic? Have you seen the autistic ode to the dragon statue?
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I think we all suspected they were just sets, and the enormous collection came largely from fan donations and whatever leftovers Mike had when he was buying literal trash bags worth of games at Funcoland when NES games were selling for pennies on the dollar 20 years ago. And of course, they were built in his house because he came off as so down to earth, not a millionaire that could easily afford a RLM-style studio. Which, uh, I guess he does have now, by way of Screenwave.

Also, I think I read that they got rid of the video store set. No clue where I read that, though.

All of the awful sketches throughout the entire show make sense now, though. Like that Super Ultra Mecha Death Christ thing. No wonder he was so gung-ho on those, he's fuckin' autistic
 
Pissmaster said:
I think we all suspected they were just sets, and the enormous collection came largely from fan donations and whatever leftovers Mike had when he was buying literal trash bags worth of games at Funcoland when NES games were selling for pennies on the dollar 20 years ago. And of course, they were built in his house because he came off as so down to earth, not a millionaire that could easily afford a RLM-style studio. Which, uh, I guess he does have now, by way of Screenwave.

Also, I think I read that they got rid of the video store set. No clue where I read that, though.

All of the awful sketches throughout the entire show make sense now, though. Like that Super Ultra Mecha Death Christ thing. No wonder he was so gung-ho on those, he's fuckin' autistic
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By video store set do you mean James video store room or the video store set for Rental Reviews? It's possible that James got rid of the room which would explain why recent videos set in that room heavily use green screen.
 
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