💼 Careercow Hayden Black - Untalented comedian with a string of failures including the infamous Gen Zed; suspended from Twitter

  • Thread starter Thread starter JU 199
  • Start date Start date
  • 🏰 The Fediverse is up. If you know, you know.
  • Want to keep track of this thread?
    Accounts can bookmark posts, watch threads for updates, and jump back to where you stopped reading.
    Create account
NegaCWC said:
He didn't go for him randomly, the Kiwi tagged Black first in a different tweet:

The tweet above was posted three minutes before Hayden's tweet.
Click to expand...

Oh so it wasn't random, just a shitty comeback on a different tweet

Guess I get to post this again

hayden.png
 
Ass Manager 3000 said:
I can't rationalise why anyone would say that.
Click to expand...

I interpreted that as a contrast to Vigoda living relatively long, and the remark was supposed to be extreme eyeroll sarcasm. The thing about shock humour is that it's a cheap shot but it can work with the right delivery. Conan used to do this stuff fairly often with his stand-up bits but the thing is that the delivery is missing. It's like he has these easy ingredients for a joke but he just can't deliver more than a single "heh".
 
Clown Doll said:
I interpreted that as a contrast to Vigoda living relatively long, and the remark was supposed to be extreme eyeroll sarcasm. The thing about shock humour is that it's a cheap shot but it can work with the right delivery. Conan used to do this stuff fairly often with his stand-up bits but the thing is that the delivery is missing. It's like he has these easy ingredients for a joke but he just can't deliver more than a single "heh".
Click to expand...
You pretty much described Hayden's "comedy" style perfectly. And he seems to be under the impression that that these "Twitter jokes" is the key to fame and success. His failed attempt at standup involved him reading his Twitter posts onstage, he tried to make a show based entirely around birds making the same Twitter jokes(because Twitter is what birds do. GET IT?), and Gen Zed's plot has a lot to do with Twitter as well(Shona's an aspiring Twitter comedian, there's points where just screengrab sod his Twitter jokes just spin onto the screen accompanied by a laugh track). It's like Hayden is under the impression that telling jokes on Twitte is some kind of untapped gold mine that he just has to control.
 
Clown Doll said:
I interpreted that as a contrast to Vigoda living relatively long, and the remark was supposed to be extreme eyeroll sarcasm. The thing about shock humour is that it's a cheap shot but it can work with the right delivery. Conan used to do this stuff fairly often with his stand-up bits but the thing is that the delivery is missing. It's like he has these easy ingredients for a joke but he just can't deliver more than a single "heh".
Click to expand...

Yeah usually I'd find humor like that funny but Hayden ramps up the cruelty to intolerable levels- Think his Jimmy Carter cancer joke ("What will he die of first, old age or cancer lol")

He has no sense of irony.

SteelPlatedHeart said:
You pretty much described Hayden's "comedy" style perfectly. And he seems to be under the impression that that these "Twitter jokes" is the key to fame and success. His failed attempt at standup involved him reading his Twitter posts onstage, he tried to make a show based entirely around birds making the same Twitter jokes(because Twitter is what birds do. GET IT?), and Gen Zed's plot has a lot to do with Twitter as well(Shona's an aspiring Twitter comedian, there's points where just screengrab sod his Twitter jokes just spin onto the screen accompanied by a laugh track). It's like Hayden is under the impression that telling jokes on Twitte is some kind of untapped gold mine that he just has to control.
Click to expand...

He does that in goodnight burbank too. His character checks out twitter alot.
 
Ass Manager 3000 said:
Abe Vigoda died today. Time for hayden to work the news cycle.

View attachment 70285

I'm speechless


PLUS- Hayden is now attacking random kiwi users

View attachment 70286

:story:
Click to expand...
He misses such good set ups by kilometers.

Street Fighter killed Raul Julia. Transformers killed Orson Welles. The Island of Doctor Moreau killed Marlon Brando. But Good Burger did not kill Vigoda. We thought he was immortal!
 
Titan Lithos said:
Street Fighter killed Raul Julia. Transformers killed Orson Welles. The Island of Doctor Moreau killed Marlon Brando. But Good Burger did not kill Vigoda. We thought he was immortal!
Click to expand...
See, I actually laughed at this. Because it was funny. Take notes, Hayden - we know you're reading.
 
Clown Doll said:
I interpreted that as a contrast to Vigoda living relatively long, and the remark was supposed to be extreme eyeroll sarcasm. The thing about shock humour is that it's a cheap shot but it can work with the right delivery. Conan used to do this stuff fairly often with his stand-up bits but the thing is that the delivery is missing. It's like he has these easy ingredients for a joke but he just can't deliver more than a single "heh".
Click to expand...
I agree, I think some of his jokes could potentially work if they were properly delivered. A good example of this would be in Patton Oswalt's Special, My Weakness Is Strong.
The example is only one minute in, (although I highly recommend watching the whole hour long special, it's great) where Oswalt tells an autocorrect joke, something Black constantly tells but fails at. It's also a ridiculously basic one, basically he tried to text "I love you" to his wife but it autocorrected to "I hate". But, what makes it work is his whole delivery of the joke, which is something that Twitter lacks with its character limit.

Unfortunately, I also get the sense that, since he really seems to love these kind of Twitter jokes, his standup would be just him reading tweets off his phone.
 
Clown Doll said:
I interpreted that as a contrast to Vigoda living relatively long, and the remark was supposed to be extreme eyeroll sarcasm. The thing about shock humour is that it's a cheap shot but it can work with the right delivery. Conan used to do this stuff fairly often with his stand-up bits but the thing is that the delivery is missing. It's like he has these easy ingredients for a joke but he just can't deliver more than a single "heh".
Click to expand...

Black knows the elements of a joke but can't turn them into an actual joke of the sort that actually causes laughter. Maybe it's partly that you are more inclined to laugh at the jokes of someone you like, and if you have dealt enough with Black, you hate him as a contemptible, loathsome toad. So he's starting out in a giant hole comedy-wise, but he dug it himself.

A good comedian can manage to dig out of a hole, though, rather than just digging deeper.

My favorite example of this is Gilbert Gottfried telling a 9/11 joke while the ruins were still smoldering, an incident that spawned the "Too soon" meme. The audience was horrified and he started out in a huge hole, but then went into the Aristocrats and brought down the house. And a lot of Gottfried's schtick is being annoying and unlikeable.

Black could, if he had some style, manage to turn his own unlikeability into part of a routine.

But he doesn't, and he just sucks.

So this is an example of a joke that's marginal and could be funny if told by someone funny. It literally sucks because Hayden Black himself sucks.

sassyma seed said:
I agree, I think some of his jokes could potentially work if they were properly delivered.
Click to expand...

I promise I didn't just steal this post and sub in Gilbert Gottfried. I was writing it at the same time.
 
God Patton Oswalt made that auto-correct joke amazingly funny. Hayden Black would have utterly buttfucked that joke.
 
Last edited:
sassyma seed said:
I agree, I think some of his jokes could potentially work if they were properly delivered. A good example of this would be in Patton Oswalt's Special, My Weakness Is Strong.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=Ia8F5kvhx6IThe example is only one minute in, (although I highly recommend watching the whole hour long special, it's great) where Oswalt tells an autocorrect joke, something Black constantly tells but fails at. It's also a ridiculously basic one, basically he tried to text "I love you" to his wife but it autocorrected to "I hate". But, what makes it work is his whole delivery of the joke, which is something that Twitter lacks with its character limit.

Unfortunately, I also get the sense that, since he really seems to love these kind of Twitter jokes, his standup would be just him reading tweets off his phone.
Click to expand...
What also makes Oswalt's joke work is specificity; the scenario he describes is a pastiche of War Games and I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream. It's completely plausible as an example of a certain sci-fi subgenre, while also relating to the situation at hand (autocorrect), and being simple enough that everyone can recognize the cliches he's playing with.

And if someone in the audience doesn't get it? If they don't know the references (which he doesn't even mention by name)? Fuck 'em. He has faith that most of the audience will be able to keep up.

Hayden's problem is that he does the opposite: he over-explains everything, while still somehow leaving it vague.
I know explaining a joke is a surefire way to ruin it, but a well-crafted joke is worth picking apart just to give Hayden an impromptu writing lesson.
 
Ass Manager 3000 said:
Another oddity of Hayden's behavior is his lame comebacks. They're so poor, like 8 year-old level.
Click to expand...
Like an eight year old on the internet, whenever Hayden is criticized, he panics and sends off a reply as fast as he can. Knee-jerk reactions lead to piss poor insults. Hayden'd be right at home in a youtube comment thread.
 
Dismaying Tree said:
Like an eight year old on the internet, whenever Hayden is criticized, he panics and sends off a reply as fast as he can. Knee-jerk reactions lead to piss poor insults. Hayden'd be right at home in a youtube comment thread.
Click to expand...

This works for some people. I HATE to do it, but Donald Trump is an example of someone who can respond with some idiotic comeback nearly instantly and while it's subject to attack, the people who actually like Donald Trump generally love his comebacks like this. I could say something really uncomplimentary about those people, but they number in the millions, while you wouldn't run out of fingers or toes counting the number of people Black has of this sort.
 
Hayden retweeted and was tagged in this. Probably another interview were he talks about the evil Kiwi Farms and @Kitlen

 
And I can tell they have an even weaker footprint than the Ponzi Scheme runner with a stroke killing a third of his brain without even looking.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom