🗑️ Trashfire PPP: Pig's Passage to Portugal - Update 1/26 - Ralph got his ass kicked and murse stolen. Turns out, the citizens of Portugal are NOT big fans of the Killstream

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What actually led to Ralph's beating?

  • Official narrative, chased robber to defend his property (Manpurse, €150) and 1 VS 4 epic fight.

    Votes: 80 3.4%

  • Beaten by the pimp of an underaged prostitute.

    Votes: 755 32.0%

  • Tumbled down the steep streets like a loose boulder.

    Votes: 153 6.5%

  • Beaten by a gang of drug dealers.

    Votes: 476 20.2%

  • Uttered something stupid in front of locals.

    Votes: 850 36.0%

  • Tried to put his trotters on Warski's sister.

    Votes: 47 2.0%
  • Total voters
    2,361
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Blue Miaplacidus said:
it is entirely possible that whoever stole it emptied and it and tossed it on the side walk,
as a kid, my neighborhood was going through a string of burglaries as there was a nigger zone within 20min walking distance. one day while building dirt bike jumps in the woods a year or two later I found a stash of empty wallets and purses, was totally gonna keep the wallets but then realized one of the purses was my mothers and it was where the burglar was sorting his loots so I called the police to come gather it up.
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Yeah, that could be the case. Absolutely no one sees this fat lard blob Ethan Ralph and thinks his nylon manpurse is worth over $800.
They basically tossed the part that's worth the most in this case, thinking it's some worthless piece of junk. There's a chance Ralph could get his nylon murse back. :story:

He will be forever reminded of that beating whenever he sees that overpriced piece of Chinese nylon.
 
AltisticRight said:
Well he can, he will never be allowed in Valhalla Eurostan, I mean a European country ever again.
Many Middle Eastern and Asian ones will not accept fat worthless American parasites with outstanding medical bills either.

Ralph is lucky, this happened in Portugal not some Latin American/Middle Eastern hellhole. Hospitals there will just leave patients to rot if they're not covered and won't pay the bill upfront. Amanda would have to wire them her Subway cheque and spend extra time in the questionable streets surrounding the area. Or that's her plan, cash in on the death insurance.
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I don't think he'd actually be 86ed from the ambiguously defined continent of Europe for not paying bills, would he? I understand that maybe you mean the EU, but, hey, Greece never paid their bills and is pretty much third world country but they never got kicked out. Surely one little gunt won't be banned simply for sleazing it up.
 
Keranu said:
Just noticed that spot on his left shoulder. Is that blood or is it just the typical trash burger grease his clothes are normally soaked in?
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He probably laid unconscious on a filthy street/alleyway covered in piss, beer, grease, dog shit, vomit, spit, petrol, garbage juice…and his own blood for a good half hour. His body and shirt were basically a giant dish rag for an alley in Lisbon so I’m sure it’s new filth, not just regular old Gunt filth.
 
Magic Sun Daddy said:
I would ask out not being in a relationship with Meigh is bad news, but then I remember that she probably has some dirt on Ralph that he'd rather not have known to his haters.
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Not only that, but you have to think: he's already in MAXIMUM GRIFT mode with one bastard child custody battle, how do you think his audience is going to react to yet another abandoned child? And the mother of the second bastard is going to likely be much more vindictive and public than the first.
 
Blue Miaplacidus said:
he had two phones, an iphone and an android, looks like they stole the iphone

I think it lends more evidence to the black out drunk started shit with the wrong people theory, first it was all a bit blurry, now he doesn't know if there were 3 or 4, and it was broad daylight? Dude, if you legit got into a fight that ended in that bad of a beating I'm pretty sure as shit you would remember exactly how many people were whooping your ass if you weren't black out drunk acting like a nigger.
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Possibly. The now missing cell phone could hold evidence of what he was really doing when he got mugged and he ditched it. Who knows at this point?
 
rhinoplasty said:
I don't think he'd actually be 86ed from the ambiguously defined continent of Europe for not paying bills, would he? I understand that maybe you mean the EU, but, hey, Greece never paid their bills and is pretty much third world country but they never got kicked out. Surely one little gunt won't be banned simply for sleazing it up.
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To be honest, I'm not 100% sure. Greece and a range of EU countries are welfare parasites, this doesn't mean they can't be extremely selective and pedantic about the tourists they allow in.
 
I just went on a 5 minute autistic daydream thinking about Null taking out a loan for a few million dollars and starting the worlds first physical lolcow museum. He acquires a bunch of memorabilia - The Gurse, Sonichu amulets and original Sonichu panels, Yaniv's dilators, etc- and displays them in wings dedicated to specific lolcows that are jam packed with the history behind the lolcows and the items on display. I think this is a solid business opportunity and it all starts with Josh acquiring Ralph's Armani gunt-purse from this Portugal monkey on that auction site.
 
rhinoplasty said:
I don't think he'd actually be 86ed from the ambiguously defined continent of Europe for not paying bills, would he? I understand that maybe you mean the EU, but, hey, Greece never paid their bills and is pretty much third world country but they never got kicked out. Surely one little gunt won't be banned simply for sleazing it up.
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It's quite interesting how it works in portugal. They won't send a bill until you've left the hospital for thirty days. Then they send a bill and a payment plan.
 
After wasting a fucking hour and a half, Rackets is going to address the Portugal shit finally. Here's the link again in case anyone missed it or cares:
 
I'll end my commentary here by stating that this was uniquely satisfying. While Ralph may be slowly and fundamentally fucking up his life, he's usually dodged immediate and hilarious consequences. He has had an odd luck against things like going to jail or being forced to register as a sex offender, so seeing him getting his shit kicked in while in a foreign country is a rare but welcome release. Thanks to his attention whore nature, nobody even has to hack, leak, or phish anything; he posts every humiliating moment on twitter. I don't know about you fuckers, but if I got the shit kicked out of me by some brown-skin pimp, I wouldn't let anyone point a phone at me until my face deflated.
 
Telemeter said:
You know, he could have just said he got mugged and defended himself, that would have been believable. He could have said it was multiple muggers, that is also perfectly fine.

Then he said he "chased them down" and now the entire thing is suspect. Everything he said before that may well be a lie, since he's obviously lying already.

He could have just picked a fight in good old gunted-midget-wigger fashion, as he has a criminal history of doing (Rekieta even talked about Ralph picking fights with a fat women in Miami in one of his streams), and got the shit kicked out of him by just a regular Portuguese Joe who is a foot taller, 100lbs lighter and not a pussy.

If he's going to lie he needs to know when to stop or the entire thing comes crumbling down.

Are there public police reports in Lisbon? If he really did get mugged and hospitalized there should be some record of it even if the police end up doing nothing about it.

Or, you know, there might be an euro-mugshot in meters about a midget caught picking fights at a bar, just no charges pressed cause he almost died and pig abuse makes everyone look bad.
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You know.. it seems plausible he took a punch to the side of the face which broke his eye socket. Then the dipshit chased after the guy, tripped, fell and busted his nose and teeth. So he had to make shit up to not look like the complete imbecile that he is. It could explain the cuts under his eyes from his sun glasses smashing in to the pavement and cutting his face since both cuts are conveniently right under where his sunglasses would be. Apologies if this may have already been mentioned, but fuck me I'm 50 pages behind and this shit is still moving.

The person who robbed him felt so much pity for the fat fucking retard they called an ambulance for him before leaving because you know he had no clue where he was.
 
I tend to believe that what happened is Ralph did some wigger/criminal shit, agitated somebody/a group and got the shit kicked out of him for it. Afterwards the guy(s) (or gals!) responsible stole his bag for the fuck of it which had some of his things inside, which he is now spinning into a mugging in which he was not the aggressor.

Another thing, what if he catches covid while in hospital? This retarded faggot might actually be dead this time next month.
 
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