The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch / @TenaciousRanch / Steampunk Penny / Penellope Logue / Phillip Matthew Logue - Don't cry because it ended, laugh because it's still getting worse.

[80's Dad]

Surely this is against the ToS? There's already another GoFundMe for Lakota mutual aid, plus another GoFundMe for "Help the Tenacious Unicorn Ranch Grow", plus the "fix the van" one (and they're planning one for firewood). Can you really advertise the same GoFundMe for completely different things like this?

Sorry, @AssignedEva the quote button is being funny rn. But I've been wondering the same. The amount of gofundme and paypals/cashapps for the tranch as a whole, plus all the ones that they individually make for themselves... it's so confusing to figure out where exactly the money is going and if the money you'd donate to one particular cause would be spent on that goal. I wonder what's the bigger issue for gofundme. Is it worse to have one gofundme for dozens of smaller issues, or dozens of gofundmes with different causes that (I'm assuming) all just funnel into the same pot anyway?

 

[Humbert Humbert]

I think the “help us get through winter” GFM is for their needs plus the gas cost of getting up to the reservation etc. I forgot to point it out, but in both grift posts he mentions gas prices to get to the reservation despite the Lakota guy saying that they go to Colorado every month. I don’t know how that went though, nobody’s discussed it since. For all we know Penny could just be lying and they’re going to do the tradeoff in Colorado or he insisted on delivery directly to their doorstep.
The Lakota people GFM seems to be specifically just the money they’re going to give to the families (obviously let’s pretend that they’re not scamming and grifting here).
Speaking of which: [A]

And the other GFM update [A]

Something I’ve noticed is that Penny ALWAYS types out money amounts as “389.oo” instead of “389.00”. Why does he use o’s instead of zeros?

 

[Gone Ham]

Something I’ve noticed is that Penny ALWAYS types out money amounts as “389.oo” instead of “389.00”. Why does he use o’s instead of zeros?

Because sub-zero IQ

 

[AprilRains]

Sorry, @AssignedEva the quote button is being funny rn. But I've been wondering the same. The amount of gofundme and paypals/cashapps for the tranch as a whole, plus all the ones that they individually make for themselves... it's so confusing to figure out where exactly the money is going and if the money you'd donate to one particular cause would be spent on that goal. I wonder what's the bigger issue for gofundme. Is it worse to have one gofundme for dozens of smaller issues, or dozens of gofundmes with different causes that (I'm assuming) all just funnel into the same pot anyway?

I think the bigger issue is keeping it all straight for the tax man. They need to be keeping separate accounts for different efforts. If they don't, they're in trouble. They're well over the amounts that might trigger an audit.

 

[Prolego]

View attachment 2909136
Penny uploaded pic with the dog who they're getting the puppy from.

Aww, they didn't show the TV. I was waiting to see what snarky comment they were making with their choice of film, but I guess you can't beat last time's "Dumb and Dumber". And just for any sucker donators who happen to end up here, take note that your donations are going to people who cut their dogs' ears off just to make them look tougher. How would "Save an Alpaca, mutilate a dog." work as a fund-raising slogan?

I’ve been thinking that us Farmers would do a better job of ranching than the Tranch for a while

Honestly, no-one could do it an awful lot better. That land is just totally unsuited for ranching unless you have a few hundred head of cattle roaming over several thousand acres. Like the buffalo used to to a few centuries ago. Shitty land, shitty location, shitty growing season. It's like keeping a sheep on the balcony of a 3rd floor condo and trying to feed it by growing grass in a bucket.

Maybe if they'd bought some carpentry tools they could have set up a small business in their outhouse. Or some metal working kit. Or even tools to set themselves up as mechanics. Maybe a Prius and sign up to Uber. A decent sized RV so they could commute to a town with jobs, then just come back at weekends. Or they could have used their grift bucks to buy a viable business in town. But they got a nice capital windfall and pissed it away on nothing. We're heading towards a 21st century Donner Party.

 

[Kung Pow Cream]

I don't understand why they are fixated on the Oglala Lakota. Seems odd, is all.

It's because they're still trying to do damage control when the coffee producers were anti native. They probably got the idea from a random person and ran with it.

Also as someone else in the thread pointed out, wool is an insulator which is why it's good for the inside of gloves. Alpaca wool lined leather gloves would actually be really nice as alpaca wool tends to be warmer, very soft and not so scratchy, but you'd need it to be the lining.

Just wearing wool gloves is not a great idea because they stop being warm once they get wet (they'll be warmer than polyester, but they won't be warm). Do not listen to anyone who tells says wool is "warm when wet", or that wool (alpaca or otherwise) is "waterproof" and "won't get wet" - it's water repellent, which means it won't get wet as quickly as, say, cotton but it will still get wet.

There is nothing they can make out of the "yarn",

Also one thing to remind everyone: pure alpaca yarn isn't really good for anything. Alpaca yarn stretches and doesn't hold its shape. It's only good for shawls and drapey accessories. The yarn that you see in the stores is usually a blend of wool and alpaca or acrylic and alpaca with the majority not being alpaca.

If you make a scarf from pure alpaca, it will eventually become stretched out. If you make a hat, it will lose its shape. Gloves will become a few sizes larger and will be big. It's kinda useless for gloves and coats or anything that isn't a drapey piece of clothing.

 

[AMHOLIO]

I think the bigger issue is keeping it all straight for the tax man. They need to be keeping separate accounts for different efforts. If they don't, they're in trouble. They're well over the amounts that might trigger an audit.

I'm getting mildly optimistic for a tax saga. Not since DSP I've seen a worthy financhu crisis.

Honestly, no-one could do it an awful lot better. That land is just totally unsuited for ranching unless you have a few hundred head of cattle roaming over several thousand acres. Like the buffalo used to to a few centuries ago. Shitty land, shitty location, shitty growing season. It's like keeping a sheep on the balcony of a 3rd floor condo and trying to feed it

Ok, get this: we raise trans people who do nothing and use them like a human zoo?

 

[Bob_]

He already has experience with banana peppers, surely alpacas are the next step for the irl kiwi farms?

Don't forget Null's pigeon wrangling skills

 

[Celestia's Little Helper]

Ok at risk of outing myself as a fucking idiot I’m actually mildly pissed that they donated all the yarn. My partner paid for a skein as a Christmas gift to a knitter because it would be very funny to peak my sister over shitty trans yarn. Not only did it never come, we got an email from Bonnie (who isn’t even at the tranch!!!) after Christmas, months after the order was placed, saying “we’re out of that color. Pick another.” Still no yarn and still no refund. And now we find that they “donated” it all to a Lakota man’s garage???

Got the trans coffee from the missionaries, though. I’m keeping the empty bag for posterity cuz that shit is toooo funny.

 

[Miss Misery]

Something I’ve noticed is that Penny ALWAYS types out money amounts as “389.oo” instead of “389.00”. Why does he use o’s instead of zeros?

Autism. Imagine a price tag: $399.oo (but with the oo in superscript).

Don't forget Null's pigeon wrangling skills

The idea of DL taking on a flock of chickens fills me with glee.

 

[AMHOLIO]

Ok at risk of outing myself as a fucking idiot I’m actually mildly pissed that they donated all the yarn. My partner paid for a skein as a Christmas gift to a knitter because it would be very funny to peak my sister over shitty trans yarn. Not only did it never come, we got an email from Bonnie (who isn’t even at the tranch!!!) after Christmas, months after the order was placed, saying “we’re out of that color. Pick another.” Still no yarn and still no refund. And now we find that they “donated” it all to a Lakota man’s garage???

Got the trans coffee from the missionaries, though. I’m keeping the empty bag for posterity cuz that shit is toooo funny.

I don't know why I'm surprised. I'm just... massively disappointed in them.

 

[Tactical Wizard]

Ok at risk of outing myself as a fucking idiot I’m actually mildly pissed that they donated all the yarn. My partner paid for a skein as a Christmas gift to a knitter because it would be very funny to peak my sister over shitty trans yarn. Not only did it never come, we got an email from Bonnie (who isn’t even at the tranch!!!) after Christmas, months after the order was placed, saying “we’re out of that color. Pick another.” Still no yarn and still no refund. And now we find that they “donated” it all to a Lakota man’s garage???

Got the trans coffee from the missionaries, though. I’m keeping the empty bag for posterity cuz that shit is toooo funny.

I'm going to engage in some rapid fire spitballing here so take it with however much salt that you please but I think you just hit on a very interesting question. If Bonnie has fucked off from the tranch and DFE'd, why's he still the one in charge of the store and handling order? And if so, where's the money going... was it going through Bonnie's hands thus preventing the tranch from minimizing losses and if so, Was the donation an attempt to starve them back? Is the web store down because it's ownership is disputed?

This could be fucking nothing but it's got my mind going a thousand miles an hour.

 

[retard strength]

Damn Penny, how does it make any sense to do these multi-state drives to donate stuff no one asked for when you can't even afford the gas to do it? What kind of white savior are you? How do you justify this sideshow when you are literally begging for money to keep your alpaca fed through the winter?

Why cant you do what you did for the artist with the pit bull and put TWENTY FIVE HUNDRED SHADY TAX FRAUD DOLLARS SMACK DAB IN THEIR HANDS, NO QUESTIONS ASKED, TWO TIMES, TWO DIFFERENT TRIPS INSTEAD OF JUST DOING IT ONCE but for firewood to the Lakota so they can go to a store just off the reservation and buy it?

 

[Celestia's Little Helper]

I don't know why I'm surprised. I'm just... massively disappointed in them.

Ultimately we just had to ask ourselves what we really expected to happen. Not this exactly, but definitely something dumb. I thought it was miraculous that the coffee (ordered separately) came at all. We’re considering it a charitable donation to the tranch now, because they clearly need the money more than we do lol

 

[stupid frog]

Ultimately we just had to ask ourselves what we really expected to happen. Not this exactly, but definitely something dumb. I thought it was miraculous that the coffee (ordered separately) came at all. We’re considering it a charitable donation to the tranch now, because they clearly need the money more than we do lol

How was the coffee?

 

[AMHOLIO]

Damn Penny, how does it make any sense to do these multi-state drives to donate stuff no one asked for when you can't even afford the gas to do it? What kind of white savior are you? How do you justify this sideshow when you are literally begging for money to keep your alpaca fed through the winter?

Why cant you do what you did for the artist with the pit bull and put TWENTY FIVE HUNDRED SHADY TAX FRAUD DOLLARS SMACK DAB IN THEIR HANDS, NO QUESTIONS ASKED, TWO TIMES, TWO DIFFERENT TRIPS INSTEAD OF JUST DOING IT ONCE but for firewood to the Lakota so they can go to a store just off the reservation and buy it?

Holy shit, what if they are in a legal tard battle between BonBon and PenPen, both trying to strangle each other by one keeping money away from the other? You're right, there's endless possibilities here.

 

[Oxyjen]

Holy shit, what if they are in a legal tard battle between BonBon and PenPen, both trying to strangle each other by one keeping money away from the other? You're right, there's endless possibilities here.

Scorched earth tactics! You love to see it.

 

[Another Sperg on the Net]

Holy shit, what if they are in a legal tard battle between BonBon and PenPen, both trying to strangle each other by one keeping money away from the other? You're right, there's endless possibilities here.

All because of some low rent natal BPD pussy, you just love to see it.

 

[Oxyjen]

I think the “help us get through winter” GFM is for their needs plus the gas cost of getting up to the reservation etc. I forgot to point it out, but in both grift posts he mentions gas prices to get to the reservation despite the Lakota guy saying that they go to Colorado every month.

Yes, I think that’s been covered (p668 onwards), the thread is just lightning fast.
Penny does seem very concerned about having reasons and funding to drive to north Colorado / SD regularly, and I’m sure it’s to do with securing animal feed at cheap or free prices. Which seems last-ditch desperate.
Notice he did not answer that totally reasonable and polite query about how can it make sense, even from a sympathetic fan.

The Lakota people GFM seems to be specifically just the money they’re going to give to the families (obviously let’s pretend that they’re not scamming and grifting here).

Right, it’s doubtful that the cash part was completely straight, in hindsight. Perhaps a deal between Penny and a native friend “look, my alpaca are starving - I’ll give you a grand in cash and the rest to follow once we’ve got through the winter. Just let us make a little video to imply we gave you the full amount”.

Honestly, no-one could do it an awful lot better. That land is just totally unsuited for ranching unless you have a few hundred head of cattle roaming over several thousand acres. Like the buffalo used to to a few centuries ago. Shitty land, shitty location, shitty growing season. It's like keeping a sheep on the balcony of a 3rd floor condo and trying to feed it by growing grass in a bucket.

Maybe if they'd bought some carpentry tools they could have set up a small business in their outhouse. Or some metal working kit. Or even tools to set themselves up as mechanics. Maybe a Prius and sign up to Uber. A decent sized RV so they could commute to a town with jobs, then just come back at weekends. Or they could have used their grift bucks to buy a viable business in town. But they got a nice capital windfall and pissed it away on nothing.

Agreed, there’s a ton of profitable, low startup cost businesses you could do. They’ve got empty land, large vehicle access, neighbours and local government that doesn’t give much of a shit what you do, and low cost or totally free volunteer labour.

You *could* grow stuff despite the horrible land and climate - organic mushrooms or greens in hoop houses. Even weed. Sure, you’ll need lighting and power for it, but you’re burning gas to keep warm anyway so could easily be doing that with a combined heat and power generator and make a profit.

But what I’d do, given all the yard space, would be to turn out tiny houses or cabin kits, ready to be shipped out. That’s a premium item that people will pay a lot for, since they’re legal to site in that part of CO. Start off with selling and assembling 3rd party kits and work up to building your own from scratch, it’s nothing complicated.
If nothing else you’d get upgraded outdoor-caste troon housing out of it rather than rotting and freezing trailers.

 

[Alpacawitz]

It's a 1st generation Honda Ridgeline. The site Fuelly puts the average mileage at 18 MPG, but that includes both generations; the second generation seems to have better fuel efficiency, but let's go with that number for fairness' sake. Google Maps gave me three routes which narrowed down to one when I added Denver as a midway stop: 474 miles meaning 28,333 gallons of fuel.

Implying that one of the tranches vehicles would make it that far...