💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

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When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%

  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%

  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 17 1.1%

  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.2%

  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.4%

  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 2.8%

  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 16.6%

  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 252 16.2%

  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 904 58.0%
  • Total voters
    1,558
SpiceyHuman said:
Not to be off topic, but why is Jack's head so pointy?
View attachment 1963596
Has the same energy of this...
View attachment 1963603
And both like to consume mass qauntities...
Click to expand...
1s5cg5jkkce31.jpg


to fit the hood better
 
Pig Cups said:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=rnPcxbF3KLI
No need to waste your time- a rather boring entry. The only use this video has is to the narrow segment of the population that's actually using the same device as Jack is and needs this tip. Nowhere in this does Jack discuss whether or not his arm is getting better (we all know the answer, but still), so it's ludicrous that the video has 'arm update' in the title. Probably just Jack being chintzy to drive up views.

I was zoned out through much of this- I just can't take my eyes off his arm, it's fucking hypnotic. At the beginning, you see the red, inflamed knuckles (that Tams probably massaged so they'd look less horrid for the camera). Then, once he gets his arm in the thing, his fingertips get all dark in what looks like blood pooling. It also appears that he has what's referred to as 'chicken skin', not to mention that his forearm flap looks like a rooster's lower comb. Plus, the goddamn thing is completely frozen. I try to keep a positive outlook, but sometimes giving up is warranted; there's nothing there that can be salvaged. Quite a thrilling trip for the sadist in me.

This is why I find it so distracting when I watch Jack's older content. All I see is.........future.........dead.........stroke arm.
Click to expand...
Archive (720p):
 
Aaway said:
also, jack still seems to be under the assumption that they made his cookies and then sold them to someone else. you'd think a guy who eats out for every meal would have a better understanding of how restaurants operate but nope, he's far too retarded for that
Click to expand...
Dude, we're talking about a guy who has spent his entire life gorging on fastfood and fatty cuisine and even his attempts to make a hamburger leads to raw, disgusting desaster.

Edit:
jfc that armstretcher thingy video. This looks like hell to me, not being able to use the hand is one thing, but it being a lump of meat frozen in a bizarre claw that always gets in the way, that's just fucking terrifying.
 
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Lenzperkins said:
View attachment 1963953
Ever notice Jack Scarfdownme really loves taking selfies? He is really feeling himself. lol.
Click to expand...
Wait until you see what the doctor looks like when he's done talking to obese retards who never take his advice and want him to magically fix all their self-induced health problems. The crucifix necklace juxtaposed with his whining is classic Jack. It's been a while since I've read the Bible, so I must have forgot the verses where it says that whining incessantly about minor inconveniences is a virtue.
 
Pig Cups said:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=rnPcxbF3KLI
No need to waste your time- a rather boring entry. The only use this video has is to the narrow segment of the population that's actually using the same device as Jack is and needs this tip. Nowhere in this does Jack discuss whether or not his arm is getting better (we all know the answer, but still), so it's ludicrous that the video has 'arm update' in the title. Probably just Jack being chintzy to drive up views.

I was zoned out through much of this- I just can't take my eyes off his arm, it's fucking hypnotic. At the beginning, you see the red, inflamed knuckles (that Tams probably massaged so they'd look less horrid for the camera). Then, once he gets his arm in the thing, his fingertips get all dark in what looks like blood pooling. It also appears that he has what's referred to as 'chicken skin', not to mention that his forearm flap looks like a rooster's lower comb. Plus, the goddamn thing is completely frozen. I try to keep a positive outlook, but sometimes giving up is warranted; there's nothing there that can be salvaged. Quite a thrilling trip for the sadist in me.

This is why I find it so distracting when I watch Jack's older content. All I see is.........future.........dead.........stroke arm.
Click to expand...
Fuck me, he can't even bend the wrist on the stroked out arm. I can't imagine suddenly not being able to bend my wrist and fingers at will that must be horrible. This video just makes a person want to do everything they can to never have a stroke.
 
Should I be surprised that FatJack is still alive these days? He has the endurance rivaling that of Barb these days.
 
Jack really cant help himself....if you watch the stroke arm update video in isolation, you would nearly feel sorry for the fat fucker...he comes across as being helpless and pathetic...he has to take off the "device" to"pull up his pants" in the toilet....(I wonder does Big T have to wipe his arse?)

But then you watch the cookie video and see his various recent uploads on social media and realise what an absolute cunt he is.....
 
Lenzperkins said:
View attachment 1963953
Ever notice Jack Scarfdownme really loves taking selfies? He is really feeling himself. lol.
Click to expand...
I can already tell he has his drooped, stroke mouth wide open too. I would of loved to hear the convo between him and the doctor.

Doctor: So how is that diet going for you?
Jackass: Its going great, I lost um...14...16 pounds!
Doctor: Ok, well I had a look at your blood work you had done recently and your cholesterol, lipids and enzyme counts are pretty high. What diet are you on exactly?
Jackass: Im on keto. Its really amazing how many places have keto options, I had this delicious pizza bowl from...
Doctor: A bowl of meat and cheese is not diet food, especially for a man in your condition.
Jackass: What do you mean? Its Keto. I havent done anything wrong.

The doctor lets out a sigh and realizes hes putting his kids through school and this fat slob is his literal piggy bank.

Neko GF said:
Original:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=fQc9bFHDDvwArchive (480p):
y2mate.com - Julia Childs Tuna Sandwich_480p.mp4
Click to expand...

Fuck me what a mess. I love how he "acts" healthy by saying hes using low carb bread then to only use half parts mayo and tuna for the filling. Sorry baby corn, you got to go cause we need more mayo on the bread. Jack, it looks like you need more tuna for your mayo sandwich.
 
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Neko GF said:
Original:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=fQc9bFHDDvwArchive (480p):
y2mate.com - Julia Childs Tuna Sandwich_480p.mp4
Click to expand...

Today on Combining with Jack, a sandwich any 4 year old American knows how to make.

1. Now he's down 16 pounds total. Wasn't it 17 within the first weekend of his shilling for Profile by Sanford? I wonder what happened? /sneed
2. Speaking on the diet, I'm sure a sandwich with tons of mayo fits right in to that.
3. Who the fuck puts mayo on their bread before putting on the over mayo'd salad? A man with two strokes and three defective limbs, that's who.
4. Why's the tuna salad so runny? He put barely any lemon juice in. It's like Jack wasn't able to get somebody else to drain the cans for him.
5. Again he pulls the retard shit of eating the sandwich sideways in order to not 'waste' his taste buds on the bread. The runny tuna salad predictably falls out.
 
Neko GF said:
Original:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=fQc9bFHDDvwArchive (480p):
y2mate.com - Julia Childs Tuna Sandwich_480p.mp4
Click to expand...
Looks like the mayo man is back. That tuna salad was more mayo than tuna. Also there was no need to add salt to this dish and he added way too much. He put what appeared to be 4 tablespoons, ridiculous. The tuna and mayo already have more than enough salt. I chuckled at him needing to taste the dish multiple times. His diet must have him starving. These meals recently have been horrible. Too bad the comments are still disabled so no one can give any opinions. These cooking videos are just a waste of time at this point. He needs to stop pretending to be a cooking celebrity and retire.
 
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Neko GF said:
Original:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=fQc9bFHDDvwArchive (480p):
y2mate.com - Julia Childs Tuna Sandwich_480p.mp4
Click to expand...
Down 16 pounds since he started this. But according to the app he posted his information to on this page his weight was down 16.9 pounds. That was 2 weeks ago. Meaning that he gained weight since then and is using doublethink to say he's lost 16 pounds when in total he's gained 0.9 pounds since then.

But then what do you expect from somebody who scarfing down cookies and bowls of pizza without the crust because it's KEEETOOOOOOOO!
 
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