🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[30+GameOvers]

So gunt knows that his shitty little livestream is coming to an end, and he's trying to grift his way into being a hate-magnet that people make videos on/tweet about to regain any sort of relevance...either that or make a living putting out shitty tourism blogs. Did someone tell him that he's going to need to travel around more than just Mexico in that case? He doesn't have that kind of money and never will.
Once upon a time, Ralph hosted da kontent. Then, he became da kontent, and now he is begging people to make some out of him.
Hope people just start ignoring him and he melts away just like Ronnie, except in a country his daddy didn't give him. A fitting end to a nobody like him.

 

[polar bear]

He turned the faggotry up to 1000.
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The only Maya curse happening is Montezuma's revenge making him sharding and shidding in his chair.

damn. Ralph made a mistake by simply losing weight rather than turning all that fat into muscle.
Now his head looks so fucking massive, his cap looks as tiny as the yellow duck one. He just kinda looks like he suffered a disease that caused him to be suddenly malnourished. Now in order to get the muscle back he will have to start bulking again

 

[Lidl Drip]

Wasn't there another guy who cursed our dear feeder? What ever happened to that guy? Oh...

 

[Dixieland Buckaroo]

So what thot / whore is Ralph trying to impress this time? There's no way Ralph goes out of the hovel unless he's trying to big league his way into some more pussy. I'm guessing he scraped enough together for another go at with Deni, but who knows with Ralph.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

Lol, that melon head gets me every time.

Circle of protection on that gat dang Jawsh Moon to save him from Ralph's dark magic.

 

[Johnny Doxville]

Smug ralph is great, means he's gonna do something stupid very soon

 

[Fannyscum]

Y'all are fucked now, Ralph has the ancient Mayan energy on his side, "El Magi-Chan"

Xeet

Really starting to reek of desperation here.

Xeet

EDIT: Taking bets on whether Ralph is trolling or really does lack this degree of self-awareness:

 

[Sammich]

Smug ralph is great, means he's gonna do something stupid very soon

This has been the case for years at this point. I don't get the idea of nitpickign every little thing the guy does, it's much funnier to prop him up and hype him up and let him catch big fat ls.

I generally like seeing ralph succeed because i KNOW it's just gonna make the next misstep that much funnier.
Ask yourself what's more fun, nitpicking dumb shit (wearing a murse) or watching him get hsi fancy murse stolen and his orbital bone shattered?

 

[Mr. Manchester]

Ask yourself what's more fun, nitpicking dumb shit (wearing a murse) or watching him get hsi fancy murse stolen and his orbital bone shattered?

Ralph owning a purse was funny on it's own because the more people laughed at it the more he'd wave it around like a trophy. Same with the bowling trophy he bought for himself, it's a small thing but it got a good laugh out of me.

That's the nice thing about Ralph, you can have little funny things in between the massive fuckups.

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

he's trying to grift his way into being a hate-magnet that people make videos on/tweet about to regain any sort of relevance...either that or make a living putting out shitty tourism blogs

Maybe he can collaborate with Chantal in that case. They can both be obese and irrelevant with sham relationships together.

 

[Truly Rural]

.either that or make a living putting out shitty tourism blogs

No, he is literally outside because he paid for gf experience with a woman who doesn't want to spend time with him between 4 walls.

 

[Johnny Clyde Cash]

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Is this fat retard really praying to the Aztecs on his knees with palms clasped like he's in church?

Buddy, the Aztec Gods couldn't even protect their own people. What makes you think they're gonna throw some pity your way?

The next time this faggot inevitably tries another Crisis Kang trad larp be sure to remind him that he was doing photo ops praying to heathen Gods.

 

[Sicko Hunter]

Man who said he's going to pop a bottle of champagne when Metekor dies of cancer is now lecturing people about reveling in someone else's misery. You can't make this shit up.

 

[AncientPhosphur]

>visit tourist attraction

“I’m a fucking kang they taught me the Aztec secrets I had to withhold child support from my kids to know”

 

[UCantCCPMe]

This has been the case for years at this point. I don't get the idea of nitpickign every little thing the guy does, it's much funnier to prop him up and hype him up and let him catch big fat ls.

I generally like seeing ralph succeed because i KNOW it's just gonna make the next misstep that much funnier.
Ask yourself what's more fun, nitpicking dumb shit (wearing a murse) or watching him get hsi fancy murse stolen and his orbital bone shattered?

Good point. Ralph I hope you make a million dollars.....

in losing bets and the bookie breaks your legs

 

[30+GameOvers]

Metokur can get 15K people to come watch his stream about some retarded boomer on a day's notice and on a holiday, plus sell his merch. Ralph has to beg and bait people into even talking about him. In fact, I think Jim is still one of the few people outside this thread that pays attention to piggy anymore, and I think that's out of pity, "for old time's sake".
Ralph, go watch IP2 streams. This is your only destiny now, start a Mexican branch and make history. You want attention and money, that's the only way to get it now. Have that whore on with you while you're at it, promise her big money and shiny objects, she's stupid enough to fall for it and bring even more content for your new trailer streams.

 

[Um...]

Is this fat retard really praying to the Aztecs on his knees with palms clasped like he's in church?

Mayans, not Aztecs. He’s at Uxmal, which is 50 mi. south of Merida.

I thought looking at Ralph’s pics of his big baller vacation trip that it looked like some ghetto cinderblock beach.

According to Deni’s pic on her thirst trap instagram, it’s Sisal,

30 miles north of Merida. And it indeed seems to be a ghetto cinderblock beach, exactly as pictured.

which is probably why he chose not to include a more revealing, panoramic pic.
So why Sisal, you ask? Well, 1) it’s cheap, 2) it’s close to his rented hovel, and 3) it’s cheap. Specifcally,

- It is mostly a sleepy beach town visited by residents of Merida
- located 53 km from Merida, making it a popular beach getaway for the people of Merida.
- the town retains its quiet feel, except for on the weekends, when the people of Merida arrive for weekend beach trips.

and best of all,
- prices are lower than more developed areas of Mexico
https://www.5losttogether.com/getting-off-the-beaten-path-sisal-in-the-yucatan/

The other place, the dusty Mayan pyramids, is Uxmal as mentioned above. And oh yeah, he also visited some museum in Merida. Gee, you’d think that a baller like Ralph, raking in those big livestream bucks ($500/day of totally real not at all fake donations) would go somewhere high-end and exotic on his ‘vacation,’

not spend it rattling around within an hour’s drive of his rental box.
(Actually it’s exactly what you’d expect from a broke bitch like him.)

 

[Mr. Manchester]

>visit tourist attraction

“I’m a fucking kang they taught me the Aztec secrets I had to withhold child support from my kids to know”

Seems like there's a point in every lolcow's career where they start thinking they have magic powers. Ralph's ancient Aztec magic is a pretty cool version if you want my honest opinion. Lets just hope he doesn't end up as a blood sacrifice somewhere, the Aztec gods will just spit him right back out and probably cause an earthquake or something.

 

[Trigger Me Timbers]

Y'all are fucked now, Ralph has the ancient Mayan energy on his side, "El Magi-Chan"
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Xeet

Really starting to reek of desperation here.
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Xeet

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EDIT: Taking bets on whether Ralph is trolling or really does lack this degree of self-awareness:
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… Pigs weren't introduced to the new world until Cortez brought them over…

The Mayans slaughtered all the pigs they could find as they believed them to be a bad omen.

 

[AltisticRight]

Um yes. Tostitos probably being the most well known brand but there are tons of smaller brands.
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Guaranteed, whatever restaurant gunt went to is using salsa from a jar since they served tortilla chips from Costco.

Ah, Tostitos. I rarely visit the jarred stuff isle.
What I do know is Tostitos also offer these.

They're not as salty as the Mission branded ones, which I'm 99% sure was in that photo, wedged into the cup of gross slop.

Eating like a King indeed. He's in Mexico eating slop any butt fuck hellhole in the country his daddy gave him would have.