💪 Tough Guys Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

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We have got something very unusual here. Patrick has just sentenced a twitter poster to prison who appears not to be an OnA Pest. Twitter user hackingjobs appears to be a normal user with about ten percent of his posts dunking on Pat but not using any of the typical Pest patois or memes.

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Normally Pat sentences the Pests to prison and calls people he engages in political slapfights with child, fascist, nazi, idiot or radish. He has a small sideline where he informs high ranking members of the US Government that they will be going to prison at some point in the future.

Edit:hackingjobs is currently making multiple dunk posts against Pat.
 
AfghanBlue said:
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Honestly, for someone who likes to think himself very right on and motivated towards humanitarianism, Patrick has some rather #problematic internal biases about the prison population.
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You have been instructed, many trillions of times, to upload full size images, stalker. If you continue to upload images for ants, you will have no choice but to enjoy prison. You died here, stalker.
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Enjoy the full size image, stalker child.
 
S.C.U.D. said:
You have been instructed, many trillions of times, to upload full size images, stalker. If you continue to upload images for ants, you will have no choice but to enjoy prison. You died here, stalker.
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Enjoy the full size image, stalker child.
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It's impressive how Pat always finds a way to dig a deeper whole.

For shits and giggles I asked Chatgpt how could someone avoid this situation, and it is amazing how Patrick basically does everything wrong and is by far his own worse enemy:

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So do the Fat ones.
Welcome to the internet, Pat.
 
femoralcanal said:
It's impressive how Pat always finds a way to dig a deeper whole.

For shits and giggles I asked Chatgpt how could someone avoid this situation, and it is amazing how Patrick basically does everything wrong and is by far his own worse enemy:

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So do the Fat ones.
Welcome to the internet, Pat.
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He's old enough to remember the internet before the "internet"; he has no excuse not to know better - except for that he's an obese, mentally defective homosexual suffering from gynocomastia.
 
That wookie one is great. But there has to be a point where fatty realises he sounds stupid just repeating the same catchphrase over and over and it's half the reason trolls engage with him so often. Or he has blubber induced dementia which is quite likely
 
OffTopic said:
I defy anyone on this site or any other to point me toward any lolcow in history capable of producing content like this:
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No one can take that bet. Patrick is the most perfect, unique retarded God ever made. There never was and there never will be another Pat, and that's why we must cherish every moment the Man of Pig, is alive dancing for us.

Side notes on the contents: The chewbacca one is often remembered as the epitome of his bizarre personality, but I remember 3 others that are equally as hilarious and usually forgotten: a) the "Hello" you posted; b) the guitar going wauaggazzzzzzii; C) the shower one.

Special mention should also be given to the 60 or so back and forth messages he had with a user called TheSheik about his review on Goodreads. Do you guys remember that one? It went on for weeks lol
 
femoralcanal said:
No one can take that bet. Patrick is the most perfect, unique retarded God ever made. There never was and there never will be another Pat, and that's why we must cherish every moment the Man of Pig, is alive dancing for us.

Side notes on the contents: The chewbacca one is often remembered as the epitome of his bizarre personality, but I remember 3 others that are equally as hilarious and usually forgotten: a) the "Hello" you posted; b) the guitar going wauaggazzzzzzii; C) the shower one.

Special mention should also be given to the 60 or so back and forth messages he had with a user called TheSheik about his review on Goodreads. Do you guys remember that one? It went on for weeks lol
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His own 880 replies in the six-month Battle of r/Autism could be the subject of it's own documentary.


Edit:

- TheSheik: I fuck pigman in ass, make him humble!
- ThePigman: No, stalker. You won't. Enjoy prison.
 
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femoralcanal said:
No one can take that bet. Patrick is the most perfect, unique retarded God ever made. There never was and there never will be another Pat, and that's why we must cherish every moment the Man of Pig, is alive dancing for us.

Side notes on the contents: The chewbacca one is often remembered as the epitome of his bizarre personality, but I remember 3 others that are equally as hilarious and usually forgotten: a) the "Hello" you posted; b) the guitar going wauaggazzzzzzii; C) the shower one.

Special mention should also be given to the 60 or so back and forth messages he had with a user called TheSheik about his review on Goodreads. Do you guys remember that one? It went on for weeks lol
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This is one I send people when I'm introducing them to him just to show how absurd the things he'll argue about are.
 
Markorian said:
This is one I send people when I'm introducing them to him just to show how absurd the things he'll argue about are.
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I think that for the ONA guys who have been through the Rick saga from the beginning, the Traffic Court zoom video is the go-to when introducing civilians to this nonsense.
You don't have to explain who the Pests are or who Rick is, it requires no context all all. It would be funny to anyone, of any age, from any culture, in any language.

I still laugh out loud imagining what must have gone through Rick's fat head while he was sitting in his kitchen waiting for his case to start when he sees the zoom lobby is for some reason packed with upwards of 40 guests all with names referencing Sopranos characters, comedians, and sci-fi authors. The creeping panic he had to have experienced, the terror realizing those trolls he'd been childing on Twitter and Reddit for a year had somehow found out about his traffic case, found the zoom link, and coordinated a viewing party in the middle of a work day.

When someone played the People's Court audio introducing Joe Cumia I had to get up and walk out of the room I was laughing so hard. I couldn't believe it was happening in real time. Rick's heart rate had to be through the roof.
 
This may have been a slow year for our beloved Piggyman, but that one AI video from a few weeks back is the funniest thing I've seen in the last 20 years.
 
femoralcanal said:
So do the Fat ones.
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Pound-per-pound Fatrick is the least interesting lolcow ever, which would explain him never winning a Julaay. This isn’t because he’s uninteresting, mind you, but simply because his corpulence so far outstrips any other trait about him.
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Holy shit he is such a bad liar. True to being a supposed sci-fi writer, he’s terminally bad at the implications the math behind his writing holds: 400 miles per year is less than 8 miles per week (10 per week if he doesn’t run the three months of winter). A 5k run is 3 miles in and of itself, which is a warmup for people who regularly run half-marathons. How far of him to lie like this.

The bench press is ultra funny because his arms clearly have never lifted anything heavier than a pint of beer any further than to his face.
 
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Major said:
That wookie one is great. But there has to be a point where fatty realises he sounds stupid just repeating the same catchphrase over and over and it's half the reason trolls engage with him so often. Or he has blubber induced dementia which is quite likely
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He is absolutely incapable of any realization whatsoever.

Even if someone chained him down and forced him not to tweet, he'd still mumble "enjoy prison, stalker" under his breath. He can't not do it.
 
McMitch said:
The bench press is ultra funny because his arms clearly have never lifted anything heavier than a pint of beer any further than to his face.
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Pat is a big boy. I'd say he can probably rep 75lbs. If he can lift 110 once I'd be amazed. Still, he's not a weak as everybody thinks, mass has its benefits even unformed tender veal like his muscles.
 
Sog Dog said:
There's a handful of them that I really have no sympathy for. Pat, obviously. DSP is another one, he's not actually an exceptional individual, he's just a really stupid, lazy, greedy asshole, so he has no excuse and all of his problems are self-inflicted like Pat's. I'd put Ethan Ralph and most of the sektur cows in that category too. At least an actual retard like Chris or Cobes, or someone like Rekieta or Bossman who's burned his brain out with drugs is somewhat worthy of pity and empathy, if not sympathy.
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No one should feel sorry for Rekieta. He has continuously put his children (whom he seems to care very little for) in danger to the point where one had high amounts of cocaine in their blood, yet somehow he only got away with a slap on the wrist for it. Say what you will about Patrick and his threats to murder Adrienne and an unborn Annabelle, at least he had some non-adipose encrusted braincells to completely surrender his parental rights.

I can't believe I'm saying something positive about Patrick, but Rekieta is that much of a contemptable, horrorcow scumbag when it comes to parenting.
 
From Owen:
Patrick is still negging Ade’s brother on Facebook.
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In the thread discussing it, it’s mentioned that Pat used to bro out and apparently fondly recalls his time watching LOTR with her brother. I cannot think of anything more cringe than abandoning your daughter and posting overfamiliar shit talking under her uncle’s page in the vague hope that your ex will notice you. Pat musT be seen, child.
 
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