The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch / @TenaciousRanch / Steampunk Penny / Penellope Logue / Phillip Matthew Logue - Don't cry because it ended, laugh because it's still getting worse.

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Who are the top three strongest characters in the Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe (KGIU) canon?

  • Gash Coyote

    Votes: 103 4.5%

  • Rioley

    Votes: 279 12.1%

  • Penis

    Votes: 417 18.1%

  • Loathsome Dung Eater Jen

    Votes: 300 13.0%

  • Boner

    Votes: 300 13.0%

  • Kevin Gibes

    Votes: 684 29.7%

  • The Elusive Earl

    Votes: 716 31.0%

  • Landon Hiscock

    Votes: 266 11.5%

  • The Korps LARP Brigade

    Votes: 205 8.9%

  • Kiwifarms Militia

    Votes: 1,149 49.8%

  • Kindness

    Votes: 669 29.0%

  • Trans Cucumber The Child Abandoner

    Votes: 313 13.6%
  • Total voters
    2,306
I like that their plate carriers are too big for their plates.

Also, I bet they're using AR500 because they're broke dumb faggots. Why don't they have helmets? If you need plates you probably also need a helmet.
I wouldn't expect dumb trannies to know anything about tactics. What are they doing, waltzing around town square trying to find their retard friend?
 
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Cool, a group of weirdo guys feeding into one another's delusions and projecting that insanity into the ether for us to laugh at. I appreciate their entertainment value, and will be momentarily disappointed when they all join the 41%.
 
The closest and still stretching believability possibility isone of the tranny went out for whatever reason, panicked at not being in their safe space anymore and the tryhard duo went to pic them up, gear optional and to save face (too late) they took that photo and made up an obviously bullshit story.
It stretch believability since that require effort
Gone Ham said:
They now have a wikipedia page. It's as biased as you would think. It blatantly goes against all the rules on wikipedia, but considering they're troons, it'll probably stay up.

Also we have confirmation that the other Tranch is in Bellingham, Washington

Edit: It's been written by the world famous GorillaWarfare, the female wikipedia editor who is blatantly biased, so it's most certainly not going anywhere
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Late but there's another Tranch?
 
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If a bunch of trannies pulled up to my home with airsoft gear trying to abduct any of my children, they'd be getting some serious plate checks. I can imagine an actual fella "white supremacists den" would respond with much more overwhelming force
 
CryoRevival #SJ-112 said:
Forgive me if someone has already done the economics of this, but I find this to be an interesting economics question.

First, establishing their alpaca costs, $369 per animal but cost cut to $250, according to this lady's blog. So assuming economy of scale, cost cutting, inflation, and neglect, lets say $190 annually (Who needs vet visits, vaccinations).

So at 170 animals at $190 each = $32,300 animal upkeep costs per annum.

Their reported fleece production is 2000 pounds (though this is highly unlikely as adult alpacas average 10 pounds of fleece per 12-18 months), but I will take them at their word.
______________
Milling Partner:
I am making an assumption here that they exclusively deal with Soundview Fiber Mill.
  • This assumption is based on the fact that they process their yarn.
  • Are based in Washington State (1400mile drive away).
  • There are two mills in the state and two more mills considerably closer which have better pricing.
  • They seem like the type of crew who would go for the easiest option.
NameStatecost/lbs
Mystic Pines Fiber ProcessingArizona$ 33.00
Tahoma Vista Fiber MillWashington$ 35.00
Yampa Valley FiberworksColorado$ 37.00
The Fleece FactoryColorado$ 38.00
Ranch of the OaksArizona$ 38.00
Soundview Fiber MillWashington$ 41.50
Data scraped from mill sites found here its's pretty bare bones and doesn't account for delivered vs washed weights, but it's sufficient.
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Sales Floor:
Soundview Fiber Mill offers alpaca fiber for weaving at $15/lbs.

Assuming some kind of magic rainbow land where they buy the tranch's fiber at $15/pound (taking a significant loss), this adds up to $30,000 (minus shipping cost), or -$2,300 profit.
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Selling Yarn!
Ofcourse we know that the ranch sells yarn, and before their 'virtue signal to your friends your tranny yarn' $30.00 per 215 yards units,

Now, I haven't been following the tranch too long, so I don't know if their website yarn has ever actually been available, but once you see the economics of selling alpaca wool at the prices they're advertising, it will make sense why they advertise so high, despite the questionable quality of their product. Spoiler alert, it's optics.

They currently advertise a White 50 percent alpaca 50 percent wool worsted weight 215yard yarn,

Costs according to Soundview Fiber Mill:
Alpaca Fleece Washing Cost: $8.50 / pound
Processing Cost (Worsted 700 - 900 yd output): $30 / pound
Wool for Blending cost: $15 / pound
Discount for over 50pound transaction: 15%

Wash out rate (When you wash a fleece you lose some of its weight): Industry standard assumption = 15%

Delivery weight = 2000 pounds
Washed Weight = delivery weight * 0.85 = 1700 pounds
Wool Weight should match washed weight = 1700 pounds

Costs:
((Delivered weight * washing cost) + (washed weight * wool cost) + ((wool weight + washed weight) * Processing Cost)) * (1 - Discount rate) = cost of production
((2000 * $8.5) + (1700 * $15) + ((1700 + 1700) * $30))*(1-0.15) = cost of production
($17,000 + $25,500 + $102,000) * 85% = $122,825

Revenue potential:
Input weight: 3400 pounds
Assuming an optimistic 900 yd yarn / pound
Sale unit: 215 yard
Sale unit price: $30

((Input weight * Yards per pound) / (sales unit)) * Sale Unit Price = theoretical revenue
((3400 * 900) / 215)) * $30 = 14,232 skeins @ $30 each = $426,976 🌈 🌈 🌈 Revenue.

Profit:
$426,976 - ($122,825 + $32,300) = $271,851 per annum.

This is of course ignoring shipping costs both upstream and downstream of their store.

Total Skeins: 14,232
Break Even point: 5170 skeins sold @ $30.00 ex. shipping and tax.

_______________
Conclusion:
When taking an optimistic view :
All inputs, from their 120% fleece intake, to minimal animal wellbeing considerations, to assuming optimal yields on all processing, to assuming they're able to sell 14000 skeins of their yarn despite advertising literally only selling it in one place, they're made in the shade.

When taking a more realistic view:
I think that they probably sell most of their fleece to Soundview fiber mill (they were the only mill I found which did not appear to have an alpaca farm, but offered alpaca wool for multi-fiber weaving, though they don't sell any in their store so this is a bit tinfoil on my part) and get a maybe a few hundred skeins to sell on their store (on the bottom of the store page) for looks. Pulling in the rest from grifting.
It really is an issue of demand here, I don't think there's sufficient demand from the hobby knitting community for $30 / skein shit yarn. The virtue signal can only carry this product so far.

I'm betting someone has already done this kind of post, but it was interesting.
In this magic land scenario they could break even at $11 per skein. But distribution is just too big an issue, if they were to partner with a company, the quality assurance, upstream supply chain auditing , and animal rights considerations would fucking murder them.

At least they get to outwardly pretend they run a viable business as they pan handle so that the media stories can continue to flow.
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So while working my way through this tread I doscovered that they were donated a years worth of animal feed, meaning that the functional cost of their alpacas has been 0 6ish months.

I think this supports my hypothesis that they are selling raw alpaca fleeces to their mill, at least in recent times.

Also they claimed back in march that they had over 200 alpacas, as of july their herd was reported as almost 170. Meaning either the earlier figure was actually across all animals they have and I misread it, or they have lost over 30 alpacas since the beginning of this thread. Which, how do you lose 30 x 150 pound animals in summer? Are wolves a big thing in Colorado?
 
Tism the Return said:
So which one of them is Mr. T's character in the Tranch Team? Or are they all meant to be Mr. (low) T? What's the lore?
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Penny, the one on the left (she/ her patch on vest) in the highlight pic set that made the Happenings board, is the Mr. T Mx. T of the bunch.
CommonSenseWYAHoney said:
Yeah, I’d be disappointed too if my owners managed to colossally fuck up every aspect of running a farm.
C3CBA6CC-CB96-43A2-AB9A-D57D79BADA98.png
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💯👍
Adolphin said:
The disappointment of that alpaca is insurmountable. I can't help it to say again about how bad I feel for those poor abused animals.
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Same dude.
48EE096A-D59E-4722-AF7A-F364CED83FF1.jpeg

That alpaca knows. He’s seen some shit.
 
I just want to see whoever they picked up. I don’t believe they would go rescue anyone, but I 100% believe they would drive 2,000 miles to pick up some troon they found attractive and who agreed to be their sissy slave cum dumpster -or just as likely- a troon with some cash in the bank and an SSI check to turn over every month.

I still think the Tranch will end up being like the scheme Dorothea Puente ran from her house.
 
MirnaMinkoff said:
I just want to see whoever they picked up. I don’t believe they would go rescue anyone, but I 100% believe they would drive 2,000 miles to pick up some troon they found attractive and who agreed to be their sissy slave cum dumpster -or just as likely- a troon with some cash in the bank and an SSI check to turn over every month.

I still think the Tranch will end up being like the scheme Dorothea Puente ran from her house.
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I kind of doubt they picked anyone up.
 
TiggerNits said:
If a bunch of trannies pulled up to my home with airsoft gear trying to abduct any of my children, they'd be getting some serious plate checks. I can imagine an actual fella "white supremacists den" would respond with much more overwhelming force
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One well placed ding on the cheap plates. Hell, even just a courtesy warning shot would make them turn tail and run.
 
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