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6 Transgender Women Talk Menstruation
We spoke with six transgender women about their experiences with menstruation, from dysphoria to PMS.periodaisle.com
6 transgender women talk menstruation
by Guest Blogger
Weeks ago, a once-beloved children’s book author sent a tweet she seemed to think was clever or funny. Replying to an article about creating a more equal post-COVID-19 world for people who menstruate, J.K. Rowling wrote, “‘People who menstruate.’ I’m sure there used to be a word for those people. Someone help me out. Wumben? Wimpund? Woomud?”
The tweet sparked immediate backlash from followers who saw her “funny” words for what they really are: an invalidation of transgender people.
“What's happening right now with J.K. Rowling and the trans-exclusionary folks who have said very clearly that the only people they consider to be women are people who have uteruses is really painful,” says Tess, a transgender woman and professor of informatics.
It’s painful for transgender men and nonbinary people who have uteruses and are hearing that their body parts define their gender. And it’s also painful for transgender women like Tess, who don’t have uteruses and don’t bleed on a monthly cycle, but who are women and many of whom do have a period. “As a trans woman, obviously you don't have a monthly bleeding cycle, you don't have a uterus, you don't have ovaries. But you'll hear trans women talk a lot about having their periods,” says Meghan, a transgender woman and officer in the Royal Canadian Navy.
We’ve spoken with six transgender women, including Tess and Meghan, about their experiences with menstruation, from dysphoria to PMS. Read their stories below:
On periods and pregnancy:
Many of the transgender women we spoke to said they never felt much dysphoria around menstruation itself, but did start feeling dysphoric when they connected periods with pregnancy.
“It’s very confusing to feel the urge to have a child when you can’t,” says Mia, author of Yes, You Are Trans Enough. Some of the women pointed out that this is also true for cisgender women who struggle with fertility — yet, their inability to menstruate and to conceive a child doesn’t call their womanhood into question.
Yet others watched their partners through pregnancy and birth, and felt a longing for that experience. “My body regrets not being able to have children. When my wife and I were planning to start a family, I was much more interested in childbearing,” Tess says. “She said, ‘I guess we could have switched.’ I would have done so in a heartbeat.” At the time, Tess wouldn’t have described wishing that she could switch places with her pregnant wife as dysphoria. “But I can retroactively understand what I felt as a form of dysphoria. While my wife was pregnant, when she was breastfeeding, I strongly empathized with her, and identified with her, and felt blocked from being able to do so because I was still presenting male.”
Meghan has a similar experience. Thinking about periods leads her to thinking about pregnancy, and even though she and her wife have three children, she feels like she missed out on experiencing pregnancy for herself.
For Aurelia, who works in tech policy, wanting to be able to get pregnant led to obsessive thoughts about periods. “I had a real fixation prior to coming out and realizing that I was trans about being able to have kids and therefore have a period as symbolic of that,” she says. “It was this thing I was endlessly curious about and endlessly fascinated about. I thought it would be nice to have that cycle.”
On clueless things cisgender women say (but shouldn’t):
“The only negative emotions I’ve had relating to periods is when cis women tell me I’m ‘lucky’ for not having them,” Mia says. She understands that it’s meant to be a joke about how terrible periods are, but it’s a hurtful comment nonetheless. “If I had a choice of my body having a period or not I’d choose not, but if you take a second to think about why I don’t have one it’s because my body can’t bear children. There’s nothing ‘lucky’ about that,” she says.
Even well-meaning cisgender women say hurtful things like this to transgender women about menstruation. “It's similar to the first time you get catcalled as a trans woman or the first time you get talked over at a meeting or interrupted. A well-meaning cis friend will say, ‘Welcome to being a woman.’ And that can be problematic because I have experienced being a woman and not being seen as a woman for years. And these things make it seem like my womanhood is contingent upon presentation,” Tess says.
On PMS symptoms:
Meghan was once in the camp that trans women can’t experience PMS. “I thought it was maybe wishful thinking or psychosomatic,” she says. But then she started feeling PMS symptoms herself when her endocrinologist switched her to a new antiandrogen, which prevents androgens like testosterone from affecting the body. “Within a couple of weeks, I started getting much more emotional than I used to. My emotions started bombarding me and I would have these crying fits.” One day, Meghan came home from grocery shopping and, as she was unpacking the bags, her wife asked if she remembered to get diapers. “I said, no, I forgot, and I immediately started bawling my eyes out,” she says.
Eventually, the mood swings became cyclical, showing up every three to five weeks, and Meghan started feeling some physical symptoms, too. “There have been about two or three times when I've actually experienced physical cramping in my lower belly. And anytime I heard other people say they experienced cramping, I thought that's not physically possible. We don't have the parts,” she says. Now, Meghan feels much more sympathetic to other transgender women who talk about their periods. And the experience seems pretty common — Tess, Aurelia, Crystal, and Angela, a writer and developer, also feel PMS symptoms.
“I tend to have trouble seeing the bright side. I tend to get pretty grumpy and moody,” Tess says. “I also get some of the gastrointestinal symptoms of menstruation. I get cramping. My girlfriend who is also trans gets more serious cramping.”
For Crystal, “it's a predictable pattern of weight gain, listlessness, and being done with the world. Once in a blue moon it comes with some minor cramping for a few days, which is honestly a little upsetting because wtf down there is even cramping?” she says.
Aurelia, who has bipolar type two, started getting severe emotional swings after starting HRT (hormone replacement therapy). “Having mood swings on top of a disposition to have mood swings is not great,” she says. It took a while to figure out how to manage her moods, and Aurelia was having severe cramps on top of that. “It's definitely a thing I am very aware of now that I might have a week where I'm just going to have an anxiety attack every day. I can understand what I need to do and take a week off or reschedule my day,” she says.
Angela’s experience has been more positive. She says, “After a year, I added progesterone to my HRT, and the staccato moodiness of my ‘second puberty’ took on a wave-like quality, ebbing and flowing. After a few months on progesterone, I found myself having PMS-like symptoms, generally around the same time as my wife, a cis woman. Those symptoms include greater emotional extremes (both good and bad), sentimentality, defensiveness, an increased craving for certain kinds of food (salt! chocolate!), bloating due to water retention, greater likelihood of migraines, and less energy. This lasts five or six days. I think the experience actually causes a kind of gender euphoria in me. It was an unexpected development but it feels correct. Like something my body wants to do.”
On period-tracking apps:
As they started noticing PMS symptoms coming every month, many of the women we spoke to started using period-tracking apps to know when to expect mood swings or cramping. “I'm in the process of trying to map something, because I'm noticing that there are some weeks when I’m just feeling bitchy. I don't want to be, but I can't help it. And it seems to be cyclical,” Tess says. She’s started using a period tracker to track her symptoms, and while she’s had to disable some of the features — she doesn’t care about ovulation or whether or not she might be pregnant — she’s able to see the emotional cycle.
The same is true for Meghan, whose period often lines up with her wife’s. “We get very snappish and we are very, very, very emotional. I even downloaded a period-tracking app so I could see that every three to five weeks I would have these peaks and valleys when my hormone cycles were kicking in,” she says.
On commiserating with other women about their periods:
It’s a common experience for people who menstruate to complain to each other about their periods — the cramping and mood swings that affect their days. Many of the transgender women we spoke to say that as cathartic as complaining about your period can be, for them it’s also validating.
For Aurelia, complaining about her PMS symptoms to a friend helped her realize that’s what they were. “I was talking with one of my dear friends about feeling bloaty and crampy and I hadn't quite figured out what was happening yet. And they said, ‘Oh, you're having your period,’” she says. That conversation led to her friend giving tips about how to manage her period.
Meghan’s period confidant is her wife, who will notice her mood swings and make fun of her. “She’ll say ‘I know you're on your period because you’re being moody, you're emotional,’' Meghan says. She says comments like this feel “strangely validating” and “wonderful.”
Tess leans on a close group of friends, both cis and trans, when complaining about her period. “I haven't had to go in-depth with my [friends] about the biomechanics of my period. But they understand that I’m experiencing something that parallels what they are experiencing,” she says. There is this sort of shared solidarity that you get from sharing suffering about what your body does to you, whether you want it to or not.”
Kasandra Brabaw is a freelance writer and editor with focus on health, sex, and LGBTQ+ identity. You can find her work at Health, Bustle, Women's Health, Allure, and other publications.
For the past few decades, the majority of women has tried to get away from the 'women are sooo emotional and unstable' stereotype. Jokes like 'she is being so bitchy, must be on her period' fell out of fashion. Only for these mentally ill motherfuckers to go back to reinforcing this shit.
Also something I've noticed that they keep mentioning: PMS symptoms == I must be having my period. It's literally called PRE menstrual syndrome. Because it happens during the luteal phase - that's the time after ovulation and until either pregnancy or menstruation, so roughly days 14-28 of the cycle (day 1 is the day of menstruation). PMS isn't an indicator of you being on your period. It is likely the result of the corpus luteum dying (no fertilisation has occurred) which causes rapid hormonal changes which in turn affect serotonin production. This changes once the menstrual phase starts. If you want to LARP that badly, at least do some basic reading.
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queue-anon
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jan 13, 2019
I'm sure they'd like to try to use "deadnaming" to avoid criminal prosecution, but law enforcement is extremely shitlordy about keeping track of all of a criminal's various aliases. I'm sure TRAs want them to stop doing that when a tranny is a criminal. I high-key will lose all hope if law enforcement rolls over on that one, and not just because I loathe everything trannies stand for. Police can't function if they don't know who the fuck they're dealing with (which of course is the objective of the entire batshit left, not just trannies).
Although regardless of what police are doing, trannies use their new identities (which get awarded no matter what kinds of horrific crimes they've committed) to avoid consequences in civilian life, such as normies googling or conducting background checks of their "deadnames".
I'm sure the rates of shelter residents getting permanent housing and meaningful employment are pretty low, but, if it's a trans shelter, I guarantee the rate will be exactly 0%.
- Joined
- Sep 7, 2016
That was a good episode where someone were given enough rope to hang themselves. Rogan didn't attack his position instead he asked stoner questions based on what Adam was saying like he's never even heard of trans-kids before. To paraphrase a line "but if a boy believes that he is a girl and is happy, why is it necessary to give him drugs to make him more of a girl?" Something like that, and it's actually a good point.
- Joined
- Dec 4, 2018
Complicated issue. Some states have laws that place restrictions on name changes for convicted felons. Some have none. This article provides more info on the situation (ignore the pro-troon tone).
One of the men suing to change the law in Illinois, Eisha Love, was convicted of attempted murder in the first degree; his male victim had to have his leg amputated due to his injuries. Peter “Donna” Langan, part of the Texas lawsuit, is the former leader of the Aryan Republic Army; he’s doing life for multiple bank robberies, assaulting federal agents, and using bombs against the feds.
One of the early cases that comes to mind is Dennis “Allison” Woolbert, a troon convicted of molesting his stepdaughter. Due to the state law at the time, Dennis didn’t have to register as a sex offender. Woolbert was able to change his name and gender marker and went on to become the executive director of some troon advocacy group until his record came out. The group initially didn’t accept his resignation until public pressure pushed them to let Dennis go.
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- Nov 12, 2019
LGBTQ+ Gayming Awards Announced To Remind Everyone It’s Current Year
July 23, 2020 EthanLGBTQ+ Gayming Awards Announced To Remind Everyone It’s Current Year July 23, 2020 Ethan
I’m sure if a game award show called “Straight White Male Gaming” or “Gaming for Heterosexuals” existed, current year media would not tear it a new orifice to defile, right? I’m sure it would go over just fine without any controversy bubbling up, right? Sarcasm aside, it wouldn’t go over well at all and wouldn’t be celebrated by mainstream outlets like the upcoming LGBTQ+ Gayming Awards set to go live in 2021.
I bet you are thinking, “I’ve never heard of the LGBTQ+ Gayming Awards before, are you sure it’s being promoted and celebrated?” To that question, yes, it is.
The same current year websites that will trash anything related to “old-school gaming culture” have simultaneously released articles to celebrate the new upcoming exhibition. Here is a handful of names praising the event:
- Kotaku.uk – London will play host to the world’s first LGBTQ+ videogame awards show next year.
- AB-Gaming – We look forward to seeing the results from the LGBTQ+ community in 2021.
- Bleeding Cool – The show will be celebrating the advancements in LGBTQ video gaming, with the support of Ukie, Out Making Games, and Games London.
- Pocketgamer – Gayming Magazine to host first ever Gayming Awards in February 2021.
- Gamasutra – A range of sponsorship opportunities are available for companies wishing to support this world-first and join Gayming Magazine in making history.
- Mirror.uk – The first-ever award recognising LGBTQ+ video games has been launched.
Lo and behold, there are even categories that are up so that people can vote and nominate games for the 2021 current year award show. Here are all eight categories:
- Authentic Representation Award
- Best LGBTQ Character
- Best LGBTQ Narrative
- Best LGBTQ Indie Game
- Best LGBTQ Streamer
- Industry Diversity Award
- Special Recognition Award
- Gayming Magazine Readers Award
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McGregor
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jan 5, 2017
@Terrifik
You obviously aren't thinking this through. The need for awards programs like this is because fagots and sub human races can't compete in regular environments. Surely that should be apparent given the scope and long march forward that history presents us with. Name me one fagot who successfully competed in the hetro sphere, or any black, brown or Asian body to excel at any form of athletic activity? We have black history month because every other month is white history. Learn your history! Sorry. I mean: Educate yourself.
You obviously aren't thinking this through. The need for awards programs like this is because fagots and sub human races can't compete in regular environments. Surely that should be apparent given the scope and long march forward that history presents us with. Name me one fagot who successfully competed in the hetro sphere, or any black, brown or Asian body to excel at any form of athletic activity? We have black history month because every other month is white history. Learn your history! Sorry. I mean: Educate yourself.
- Joined
- Feb 13, 2020
And the African athletes in the Olympic games, Middle-Eastern and African soccer players all over Europe, et cetera.
Sorry, I'm dumb, mistook this for a genuine post.
- Joined
- Sep 12, 2018
One of the most destructive ideas of the 20th century was selling "identity" shit to teenagers. It wasn't even a thing 80 years ago, and now it's an absolute cult. People are wrecking their bodies just to buy into consumerist identity shit that was originally created to sell more poodle skirts and Monkees albums.
The generations that grew up without this obsessive need to buy yourself to express yourself are almost gone.
McGregor
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jan 5, 2017
Don't feel too bad. Somebody's going to mistake the Gayming awards for legitimate as well. Happens every time.
- Joined
- Jan 18, 2017
Just give everything to TLOU2 and whatever navel gazing 2D indie walking sim that captured the journo clique's gnatty-attention spans and be done with it.
- Joined
- Feb 13, 2020
Yes, but are there any paraplegic African-American gay trannies among the developers or the characters? Pansexual two-spirit enby Chippewa Native Americans?
MrJokerRager
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Nov 2, 2019
GOP governor condemns LGBT provisions in state party platform: 'Hurtful and divisive'
North Dakota Gov. Doug Burgum, a Republican, took to Twitter on Thursday to condemn certain provisions in the state Republican Party's platform that made highly controversial claims about LGBT issues.
North Dakota Gov. Doug Burgum, a Republican, took to Twitter on Thursday to condemn certain provisions in the state Republican Party's platform that made highly controversial claims about LGBT issues.
The statements were included in a resolution on the party's opposition to "Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity Anti-Discrimination" (SOGI) bills.
The platform was approved by a mail-in vote in April and addressed a wide array of issues, not just those related to the party's position on the LBGT movement. But many, in addition to the governor, objected to those lines.
"As I’ve long said, all North Dakotans deserve to be treated equally and live free of discrimination. There’s no place for the hurtful and divisive rhetoric in the NDGOP resolutions," Burgum said. "We can respect one another’s freedoms without disrespecting or discriminating against the LGBT members of our state and our party, whom we support."
The resolution was meant to show the party's opposition to adding sexual orientation or gender identity to protected classes like race -- a generally standard position among Republicans nationwide. It also included noncontroversial statements like the party is against discrimination from a place of "hatred." Further, it noted some versions of SOGI bills "criminalize not using certain preferred pronouns." But there were a number of other declarations in the resolution that caused uproar.
One line read that "[m]any LGBT practices are unhealthy and dangerous, sometimes endangering or shortening life and sometimes infecting society at large."
Another read: "[R]esearch has shown that causes of Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender (LGBT) compulsions are primarily developmental and not genetic as in color and gender."
"SOGI bills seek to pacify those made uncomfortable as a result of their gender dysphoria," yet another said, "by compromising the potential comfort and safety of an untold number of innocent individuals."
A separate line warned that SOGI laws could "empower" gay or transgender people "to assume positions of mentorships of minors often over objections of parents influencing their emotions and thereby recruiting for their lifestyles."
"The @NDGOP thinks NoDakotans like me are only interested in recruiting young people to a lifestyle, protecting bathroom voyeurs & infecting society," Joshua Boschee, the North Dakota House Minority Leader, said in a tweet Wednesday. "Is this how my legislative colleagues feel? Is this how Gov. @DougBurgum feels? If not, then say something & do something about it!"
Burgum sent out his tweet just hours after Boschee's message, and Boschee thanked "the @NDGOP lawmakers who have started to speak out against this disgusting language within your party's platform."
North Dakota's Democratic Party said the resolution was "troubling but not surprising," in a statement reported by KX News.
The North Dakota American Civil Liberties Union also weighed in.
"If these policies don't actually reflect North Dakota, then what are constituents of all political parties doing to fix this and address the state of inclusivity for LGBTQ+ and Two Spirit folks?" the organization said in a tweet.
The state GOP's executive director, Corby Kemmer, issued a statement Wednesday apologizing for the language in that resolution, which was first reported on by The Forum of Fargo-Moorhead on Wednesday.
“The resolutions were presented for an up or down vote, and no one resolution was voted on individually,” Kemmer said.
He continued that the delegates wanted "to stand up for individual and religious liberties" but that "this language falls woefully short of that goal."
Kemmer said that the resolution would be reconsidered in a "future meeting."
- Joined
- Jul 22, 2019
'Yerh this bitch is complaining too much so im gonna fingerblast her and prescribe some hot lesbian action with a slutty midwife'
What a fucking chad move, i wish i was an old timey doctor
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
It’s now commonplace to see social media posts of cakes, balloons or clouds of smoke bursting with hues of pastel pink or blue, with exuberant parents-to-be in the foreground. This relatively new tradition is often called the 'gender reveal' of a developing baby. But experts say this ceremony is actually revealing the baby’s biological sex, as it’s based on external features. Gender is something else.
“Sex is the thing the doctor declares the day the child is born by looking at the child. Even though they use gender terms, what they mean is ‘this child is a male,’ or ‘this child is a female,’ which are sex terms,” explains Kristina Olson, a developmental psychologist at the University of Washington. “And the child's gender — I usually talk about gender identity — is the way that someone feels about their social category, whether they feel like they're a boy, a girl or something else.”
By these definitions, an ultrasound photo can’t reveal the gender of someone who hasn’t yet formed their own identity. Sarah Richardson, a feminist philosopher of science at Harvard University, also points out that gender can refer to the ways that others perceive us. It’s a social cue. “Gender could be talking about not just identity, but an individual's role or status. Being a mother is a gender role,” she says.
So, are sex and gender always separate things? And is it all written in our biology, or does society’s cultural expectations influence the relationship between them? Scholars are now pushing the limits of our knowledge, and building a more complete picture based on the latest findings.
A New Term: Gender/Sex
It turns out that one of the biggest issues in studying sex and gender isn’t far off from the public’s confusion around the so-called gender reveal announcements. “In the field, we struggle mightily with the constraints of these paired constructs,” says Richardson. “We're often in incredibly uncertain terrain, where we're almost certainly dealing with aspects of both, or an entanglement that we can't completely clarify.”
The terms are so closely related that Sari van Anders, a social neuroendocrinologist at Queen’s University in Kingston, Canada, coined the new term 'gender/sex,' which is gaining traction in the field. Van Anders says she created the term because it felt important to highlight that scientists don’t always know which characteristic they are specifically testing, and rarely design their studies to separate them out.
As to why she put the word gender first, she explains: “Sex is something that's biological, and bodily evolved. But it can only be understood through a lens of gender. We never get to biology on its own. We always have to go through our humanness to get to it. And so in that sense, gender is really primary because it's the lens through which we see.”
Bye Bye, Binary?
Olson notes that both sex and gender are often talked about as if they are binary, meaning they consist of only two groups, but it's not that simple. “We like to simplify things, and unfortunately this is an example where we shouldn’t because we are ignoring the fact that there are human beings that don’t fit cleanly into those categories.”
In particular, Olson mentions that we sometimes recognize gender as more ambiguous and fluid than sex, but sex also blurs the lines. Individuals who are intersex, for example, can have external genitalia and internal genitalia that differ, and individuals with genetic syndromes can have an extra X or Y chromosome. One comprehensive review of medical studies published in 2000 estimated that nearly 2 percent of the global population does not fit within the biological male-female binary at birth.
Richardson describes the evidence for binary categories like this: When you pool across all humans and put them on one graph, you will generally end up with two large male and female peaks for sex, or two large man and woman peaks for gender. But you will also see lots of other little dots in between those peaks. This means there is not a strict binary, though there are two predominant categories. “So, people are not binary, but the constructs may fall out that way,” she says.
Having two large categories in the overall population can lead to assumptions about binary biological phenomena that don’t always hold up. Van Anders says that early on in her training, she was taught that hormone levels are different in men and women, and they do not overlap. But more recent work from her lab and others has shown that both testosterone and estrogen levels can be very similar in men and women depending on their age, diet, activity and stress levels.
“Hormonally, there's definitely not a binary,” she says. “So really, the question is: What would be the goal of making that binary? For science, there isn't one. Usually, [the binary] is there for political reasons."
Yet, van Anders notes that just because there isn’t a strict binary in biological systems like hormones doesn’t mean that sex differences don’t exist at all or that they don’t matter. Instead, science is starting to change how we understand sex and gender differences together as a whole.
Sex and Gender Intertwined
“Things that we think of as sex differences between women and men might actually reflect, at least in part, some level of social influence,” says van Anders. Her lab has found that sexual thoughts can increase testosterone levels in women, and she explains that because women are often socialized not to think sexual thoughts, this is an example where our gendered socialization could be directly impacting our biology. Similarly, her lab found increases in testosterone during an experiment where women acted out competitive and authoritative behaviors, which she notes women are often culturally discouraged from doing.
“We think testosterone reflects biological differences between women and men, but it also could reflect these social norms that push women away from engaging in things that actually end up just increasing testosterone,” she says.
Anne Fausto-Sterling, a developmental biologist at Brown University, is studying mother-infant interactions to examine the early effects of sex and gender. She’s found that mothers tend to physically handle infant boys differently than infant girls; they pick up boys more, and hold them farther from the body (though she believes it’s an unconscious act). She hypothesizes that this can affect the developing nervous system of infants, such that what we might call sex differences in the brain could just be a result of different neural connections in response to different sensory input.
With such a complex and dynamic relationship between sex and gender, van Anders says there are many exciting questions to answer — though the field needs improvements. “Science is at its heart empirical, but people are ignoring gender diversity in a lot of their work in humans.” She also highlights that the science is still far behind many people's lived experiences. If the science eventually catches up, Richardson notes there will be an upside for all. “It will allow us to appreciate the incredible diversity to better capture and understand our own human nature,” she says. “When we exclude the diversity among and within sexes and genders, we create a science that is unjust.”
Women should die
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jun 23, 2020
lol why are we treating people with obvious mental delusions as "brave" and "powerful"? Nothing about having thoughts depicting you chopping off your genitalia is Brave or Powerful. Why are people pushing this stuff?
- Joined
- Jun 13, 2020
And there's where I stopped. Nothing this woman has to say could possibly be worth my time, which isn't very valuable to begin with.
- Joined
- Jul 6, 2015
Lol untangle your chromosomes and you won't be so confused about gender
DumbDude42
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 12, 2019
your actual sex is the only thing that matters. the notion of "gender" itself is pointless nonsense and should not be acknowledged at all.
- Joined
- May 16, 2019
Great, fine, male and female are sex terms, not gender. Immutable and objective. They are all that matters, gender is irrelevant.
Yes, thank you for confirming my statement above. Biology doesn't care about your feelings, and after a decade of LGBTQ activism, neither do I.
Nothing else in the article (or the larger debate) matters.
- Joined
- Aug 21, 2018
Worrying about gender identity is overrated, especially if you're conflating it with reproduction.